Chapter 12

[NOTE: This discourse will be in the book "India Coming Back Home", which has not been published, as of August 1992.]

WOMEN ALL OVER THE WORLD FIND YOU EXTREMELY ATTRACTIVE; ACCORDING TO YOUR CRITICS, FATALLY SO. HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR OWN SEX APPEAL?

The whole history of man is a history of condemnation of women by all the societies, by all the cultures, by all the religions. Among even the greatest human beings who have walked on the earth there is not a single one who has respected women. Moses, Jesus, Mohammed, Mahavira, even Buddha, have condemned women in some way or other. I am the first man who has given womankind the same respect as is given to man. It has nothing to do with sex appeal.

In the Jewish synagogues, women cannot sit with men, there is a curtain they have to sit behind. They are not considered equal even spiritually. When Indira Gandhi visited Israel, another woman was prime minister of Israel. Indira wanted to visit a synagogue. The Jewish woman prime minister was worried because the separation is so insulting. She made a special arrangement that both prime ministers would sit on the balcony so no men could see them, and Indira would not become aware that women are treated in such a humiliating way.

Indira was not aware of the tradition. She said to the prime minister of Israel, "This is something great. Do prime ministers in your country have a special place on the balcony in every synagogue? Even a visiting prime minister?" And it is said the Jewish prime minister simply smiled and didn't answer because the reality was totally different -- it was not respect, it was an insulting situation. To avoid it, she had created this facade.

Jesus' best followers were women, but none of them were accepted by him and his church as his apostles. The twelve apostles are all men, and when he was crucified all these twelve apostles escaped. They proved to be simply cowards, fearing that if they were caught, the same would be their fate. But the three women... Mary Magdalene was once a prostitute, but when she saw Jesus she fell in love with him and his teachings and stopped being a prostitute. She was there standing near the cross. That prostitute humiliated all those twelve apostles.

Jesus' mother, Mary, was also standing near the cross. Jesus never respected even his mother because she was a woman. Once he was speaking to a crowd and somebody from the outside shouted, "Jesus, your mother is standing here. She wants to see you, she has not seen you for three years."

And the way Jesus responded is so ugly, inconceivable, that it degrades his whole teaching. He said, "Tell that woman..." He could not even use the word mother "Tell that woman that I am not her son. My father is in heaven, and I am his only begotten son."

This was absolutely out of context -- that poor old woman simply wanted to see him. There was no need to say this. To say, "Tell that woman..." shows his attitude about womankind.

Mohammed had no respect for any women. He allowed each Mohammedan to marry more women than any other religion has allowed, four women at least. He himself married nine women. His followers have treated women like cattle. The Nizam of Hyderabad had five hundred wives, even in this century.

Parasuram, the Hindu incarnation of God, was ordered by his father to kill his mother and bring her head to prove that he had killed her, because the father suspected that she loved some other man. And Parasuram did not hesitate.

A man can never be certain who his father is. The father also cannot be certain that his children are really his, only the mother knows. But he followed the order of his father, a father who already suspected that his wife loved somebody else.

There is a possibility Parasuram was not the son of this man. But to cut the head of a woman was not a problem. Still, Parasuram remains one of the incarnations of Hindus.

Krishna surpassed all the Nizams and all the Mohammedans. He had one wife that he had married, and sixteen thousand wives stolen from other people.

Whenever he saw any beautiful woman it was enough, she was taken to his palace. No man has done such criminality as Krishna, but he is worshipped.

Mahavira, the most important prophet of Jainism, teaches that a woman cannot be released from the body and the world. First, she has to be born again as a man and only then she can attain to moksha, but not directly from the body of a woman. And these people have been saying consistently, insistently, that the soul is neither male nor female, that the body remains behind, only the soul moves, so why should a distinction be made -- that the soul of a man can reach to the highest peak of consciousness but the woman's soul cannot?

Gautam Buddha did not allow any woman to be initiated into his sannyas for twenty years. Thousands of women cried, wept, but this man, who is thought to be the most compassionate man in the world, went on denying them. He would not accept any woman as a disciple for twenty years.

It was just by coincidence that he finally had to accept a woman. The day he was born his mother died. His mother's sister did not get married, just so she could take care of this boy. No mother has loved any boy the way this woman loved, the way this woman sacrificed.

In her old age she came and asked to be initiated. There was immense silence over the ten thousand sannyasins of Gautam Buddha and he himself was in a dilemma. This woman has sacrificed her whole life for him and to say 'no' did not feel right to him. Unwillingly, he initiated her, but the condemnation was so deep that in his initiation speech he said, "My religion was going to last for five thousand years, but now that I have initiated a woman into the commune of my sannyasins, my religion will last only five hundred years."

Do you see the point? He is throwing the responsibility on a poor old woman for destroying his religion. From five thousand to five hundred means four thousand five hundred years are sacrificed because one woman has been initiated. Can you condemn somebody more?

Women are attracted towards me. It is not a sex appeal; it is a spiritual appeal, because I am the first man who has not made any distinction between man and woman as far as spiritual growth is concerned.

Women are fighting all over the world, particularly in the advanced countries, for ordinary liberation from man. I have given them the ultimate liberation, the equality of consciousness. And if they are in love with me it has nothing to do with sex. It has something to do with superconsciousness.

I HAVE HEARD FROM RATHER RELIABLE SOURCES THAT IN 1969, WHEN THE LATE INDIRA GANDHI WAS OF TWO MINDS ABOUT MORARJI DESAI, YOU ADVISED HER TO SACK HIM FROM THE CABINET AND SHE DID SO EVENTUALLY. IS THIS THE REASON BEHIND HIS ANIMOSITY TOWARDS YOU?

It is true. She had discussed with me whether to remove Morarji Desai from the cabinet or not, and I said to her, "It is not a question of Morarji Desai. If anyone is against the evolving nation, if he is a blocking stone in the progress of the country, then whoever he is, he should be removed immediately -- there should not be two minds about it."

Morarji Desai's animosity toward me is not solely dependent on this fact -- it had already begun ten years before. Twenty people from all over the country were invited by Acharya Tulsi to address a gathering; they were celebrating a great festival. The gathering was big, nearabout one hundred thousand people.

I was one of those twenty people and Morarji Desai was also. Morarji Desai was then the finance minister. An incident happened that started his animosity, then many things got added to it. From my side there is no animosity against him.

The incident was that these twenty invited guests were sitting on the floor and Acharya Tulsi, the host, was sitting on a higher stage; nobody had bothered about it. Morarji, just like a political leader, arrived last.

The twenty people were gathered to first discuss human problems before they addressed the one hundred thousand people who were waiting outside. But Morarji said as he entered, "Before any other question is raised I have to ask two questions. First, when I entered I folded my hands the way in India we greet each other, but Acharya Tulsi did not respond with folded hands. Rather, he raised one of his hands to give a blessing."

That was very insulting to him, although Acharya Tulsi was simply following a Jaina tradition -- that only the monk can bless you because he is higher than you.

He has renounced the world, you have not renounced the world. You can bow down with folded hands, you can touch his feet, but that does not mean that he will respond in the same manner. The tradition is ugly, because to me, the higher person should be more humble.

And he said, "The second question is: why are the guests sitting on the floor and you, the host, are sitting on a higher stage? First, answer these two questions and then we can discuss other things."

Acharya Tulsi himself is not a religious man. He wears religious garb but he has a very political mind. He was in a fix what to do, how to answer; he did not want to annoy Morarji Desai. There was silence for a few seconds, then I said -- Morarji Desai was sitting by my side -- I said, "The question has not been asked to me so I have to ask the permission of both the parties. Acharya Tulsi has been asked but he seems to have no answer. If he allows me to answer I can answer, but I want Morarji Desai to give me permission, because he has not asked me."

He said, "It does not matter from whom the answer comes. I want the answer."

I said, "Now things can be sorted out. One thing: there are twenty guests, nineteen guests have passed through the same process, and nobody raised the question. You seem to be a very egoistic person, hence the question has arisen in your mind. Otherwise, what does it matter? He is sitting on a high stage, he can hang himself from the ceiling, still he will not be the highest. There are spiders moving on the ceiling, you can see them. If to be higher is to be greater, then those spiders are the greatest here.

"Secondly, when you greet someone with your folded hands you are showing your heart. It cannot be conditional, it cannot be that the other should respond in the same way. Otherwise, you should first make the condition that, `I will fold my hands and bow down to you if you are also ready to do it to me.' It was your fault -- you did not make the condition.

"As far as Acharya Tulsi is concerned he has proved himself simply stupid. There was no need to answer the questions, he could have just come down from his stage and sat with us on the floor. There was no need to use a single word, his action would have been an answer. But he is sitting there almost like he is dead.

He cannot move, he cannot step down from the stage, he cannot fold his hands to receive you. These two egoists are facing each other and destroying the whole conference. You both can keep quiet, the remaining eighteen people can continue the discussion."

That was the beginning of the animosity from Morarji Desai and Acharya Tulsi.

To say the truth in this world is to create enemies. But from my side I don't feel any animosity, I simply feel sad for these people, they are retarded -- they don't have any intelligence to understand simple things.

THE HEAD OF THE INTERNATIONAL KRISHNA CONSCIOUSNESS MOVEMENT SAID RECENTLY, REFERRING TO YOU, "THE BIRDS AND BEES HAVE SEX, EVEN INSECTS HAVE IT. WHY DO YOU NEED A GODMAN TO TEACH YOU THAT?"

PLEASE COMMENT.

The head of the Krishna Consciousness Movement is an American idiot.

He is doing a great job. And referring to me, he said that, "Bees have sex, birds have sex -- why do you need a godman to teach you sex?"

A godman is needed to teach you sex because you belong to the Krishna Consciousness Movement. You have forgotten what sex is.

I have heard that when this idiot was passing, two small boys were discussing the difference between ordinary men and these swamis. One boy who was a little older said, "Just wait, when you become a little older you will know."

The other said, "What? I may not understand, you try to help me."

He said, "It is a simple difference. These people use their sex organ only to urinate and others use it for other things also. But you will have to grow a little, then you will know."

Teachers are needed to show these people that the sex organ is not given to you just for urination. Nature has higher hopes!

SOME WESTERN INTELLECTUALS HAVE HAILED YOU AS A GREAT PSYCHOLOGIST AND PHILOSOPHER. DO YOU EVER REGRET THE DECISION TO BECOME A GODMAN INSTEAD OF PURSUING AN ACADEMIC CAREER? AFTER ALL, WHO WOULDN'T WANT TO BE IN THE COMPANY OF FREUD OR CARL JUNG?

The question has many questions in it. I will take them one by one.

First, the journalists are always playing a vicious game. They started calling me godman, I have never called myself godman. And then they ask me, "Why do you call yourself godman?"

There is no species in the world which can be called godman. Just to be man is enough -- there is no God. At least I cannot call myself a 'godman', because I don't accept any existence of a god who created the world.

Existence has always been here and will always be here. It was never created.

God is a hypothesis to explain something. Because existence is there, the question arises in every intelligent man's mind, "Who created it? How did it come into being?" From the time of the RIGVEDAS to today -- the same question. And when such questions arise in the mind they become a torture, you have to find some answer. Then the wise people, or unwise people, start giving you consolations. They say, "God created the world." But it is strange that you don't ask who created God; the question remains the same.

If God can be there without any creator, then why cannot existence be there without any creator? Why unnecessarily go on adding more hypotheses -- god A created god B, god B created god C... and you will not come to an end, you will fall into an infinite regress, and finally you will find the question is still there as intact as it was before. The whole journey has been futile. And even if you accept, just hypothetically, that God created the world, it does not solve anything, it creates a thousand more questions. Why has he created the world?

I was going on a journey and I went to my tailor and I told him, "Make my robe - - I have only six days, on the seventh day I will be leaving the city. In six days you have to make the robe."

He was a Christian. He said, "If you say, I will make. But just look around the world. God created the world in six days and what a mess. I will create the robe in six days, but don't tell me later on that it is just a mess!"

And because God created a mess, he has not been found since.

Either he is hiding or escaping. Physicists say the stars are escaping farther away with the speed of light. Perhaps he is riding on some big star and is just running away from the mess he created.

And why did he create it at a certain moment? What was he doing before that?

Christians say he created the world exactly four thousand and four years before Jesus Christ was born. I assume it must have been the first of January. You cannot create in the middle of the year, because where could you have started the year?

According to Christians, he created the world only six thousand years ago. And what had he been doing for the eternity that had passed before? Just sitting silently, doing nothing? And suddenly, for no reason at all -- nobody has asked him, nobody has requested him -- seems to be a little crackpot -- he created the world; and this world where everything is wrong, howsoever you arrange it.

I have heard one man was purchasing a toy for his child. It was a toy which you have to fix. It came in many parts, you have to fix those parts and then it comes to a certain figure. He fixed it in every possible way. He was a professor of mathematics, but whatever he did it was always wrong.

He was perspiring in the cold. Finally he went to the owner of the shop and he said, "Something is wrong. This toy I cannot manage. My whole life I have devoted to mathematics. Whatever you do, it always turns around."

The owner started smiling. He said, "It will turn around, whatever you do."

He said, "Well, what kind of toy is this?"

He said, "This represents the world. And it is better for your children to learn from the very beginning that whatever you do, it is going to be wrong! This toy has been created with great genius to teach children, `Don't be worried. Here, right things don't happen. There is no way to do things in a right way. All ways lead towards something which is wrong. You always end up in a mess! This is an educational toy."

The hypothesis of God does not help. I don't have any hypothesis of God. To me life is divine. To me existence is godliness, not God. To use the word `godman'

for me is simply stupid. But journalists started calling me that, and then started asking me, "Why do you call yourself godman?"

Strange! They started calling me the guru of the rich and then they started asking me, "Why do you call yourself the guru of the rich?" They started calling me the sex guru, and then they started asking me, "Why do you call yourself the sex guru?"

I have never called myself godman. Yes, the people who love me have called me Bhagwan, but Bhagwan does not mean God. We have called Gautam Buddha 'Bhagwan' -- and he does not believe in any god. We have called Mahavira 'Bhagwan' -- and he does not believe in any God.

So 'Bhagwan' cannot be synonymous with God. 'Bhagwan' simply means the blessed one, one who has attained the ultimate bliss, the peace, the joy of his own being. And I say unto you that I am the blessed one, but I am not the godman. I am simply a man fulfilled.

Secondly, your question asks, "I was praised by people as a great psychologist, as a philosopher. Why did I start calling myself a godman?"

Half of it I have answered. As for the other half, I am not a psychologist. A psychologist inquires into the complications of the mind. I am a meditator who does not bother about the mind but simply goes beyond it.

Gautam Buddha is not a psychologist. His achievement is not the knowledge of the mind, but the experience of no-mind. It is beyond psychology. I have experienced no-mind.

I cannot allow anybody to call me a psychologist. I am not. And I do not think that the people who are psychologists have anything to offer to a man who has known something beyond mind. I would like you to be reminded that psychologists commit suicide twice as often as any other profession, they go mad three times as often as any other profession. I don't want to belong to such a group of half-mad people.

You asked, "Would it not have been better to be categorized with great psychologists like Freud and Jung?"

No. To me, both are sick because both are below the silence of their own inner being. They are still struggling with empty thoughts, hot air, nothing. And if you look into their lives, you can see it.

Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychoanalysis, was so much afraid of death -- I don't think anybody present here is so much afraid. You cannot conceive, but even the word 'death' was tabooed, it was not to be uttered in his presence.

Twice it happened that somebody mentioned death and he fell from his chair into unconsciousness, his mouth foaming. Sigmund Freud flat on the ground.

The great founder of psychoanalysis had not even enough courage to listen to the word 'death'. I do not want to be categorized with these people.

Jung was expelled; in the movement of psychoanalysis he was second only to Sigmund Freud. Everybody thought that he was going to be his successor. And he was profoundly intelligent. But he was expelled from the movement because he was interested in ghosts. Sigmund Freud told him, "Drop this. I cannot even tolerate those words."

His interest was in what happens beyond death, so naturally he was interested in death, in ghosts, and this was the basic reason that he was thrown out. You would think he was a courageous man but it is not so. All his interest in ghosts and death and what happens beyond life was only intellectual. He wanted to go to Egypt to see the old, dead bodies preserved as mummies. Twelve times he booked and twelve times he cancelled. His whole life he wanted to go, but when the day came to go, he would become so afraid of seeing a dead body that was three thousand years old, he would find some excuse and cancel the ticket.

He came to India; he went to the universities. He was here for three months and it was simple stupidity to talk to the psychoanalysts in the universities because they were taught in the West -- they were parrots. He had come to try to understand the Eastern psychology. It was suggested by many people that if you want to understand Eastern psychology then you are going to the wrong people; if you want to understand Eastern psychology then there is a man in the South, Raman Maharshi. Go to that man, who has not even heard the word `psychology'.

He went to Madras and then fear gripped him because he had heard that these people have hypnotic powers, their eyes are hypnotic, their gestures are hypnotic, and it is dangerous to go to these people, they can convert you. You will forget completely for what you had come; they can put you on a new route.

From Madras he came back. Only two hours more and he would have reached Shri Raman Maharshi -- a simple man with no bookish knowledge, but of immense self-realization -- a man who has reached, who has arrived home.

Certainly he has an aura. In his presence there is a magnetism, but it is not to mislead you, it is not to misguide you. This is the way of the East, to find a man who has found himself and to sit at his feet, just in silence. There is no need to say anything. His silence can start moving your heart in a new rhythm, with a new music, which you had never heard before -- a new harmony, a new synchronicity.

First, it will happen between the disciple and the master, and then it will start happening with the trees, with the rivers, with the mountains, with the ocean, with the stars, with existence itself. The master is only a door. The Sikhs are right to call their temple Gurudwara. It simply means `the master is a door'.

And when he reached back home he was asked why he had not met people who were really rooted in the East. Going to the universities, which are by-products of the West, was simply a waste of time. However, he started finding explanations, rationalizations. And his rationalization was, "I have avoided meeting these people because the East has its own way, the West has its own way, and they are so different, so diametrically different, that it is dangerous to mix them."

This was a consolation and a rationalization, but absolutely cunning. You can teach Eastern people Western ways. He himself, in his institute in Zurich, was teaching Eastern people Western ways. That was okay, it was not disturbing anybody. But he could not learn from the East because that may disturb. If he was really honest, he should have refused Eastern people the right to study at his institute. He should have told them, "This is not your way. Go to Shri Raman Maharshi. Don't come here."

But no, if people from the East were coming, it was perfectly okay to condition their minds, to program their minds, to fill their minds with all kinds of rubbish.

But when he came here, he avoided those people who can help you get rid of all rubbish, who can help you become absolutely silent and peaceful, in deep harmony with existence.

I don't see that being in harmony with existence can disturb anybody. Not a single meditator has ever committed suicide, not a single meditator has ever gone mad.

Western psychology has nothing to teach to the East. It has everything to learn from the East, because it is still working in the mind. Our whole approach is to transcend mind, don't be bothered with it, leave it behind. You are bigger than it.

Western psychology thinks mind is all; it is not, it is just the surface. Your innermost reality is far away from your mind. It is closer to the universal existence. It is far closer to the farthest star than it is to your own mind. And the moment you transcend the mind the mind starts stopping on its own, because you are no more feeding it energy, you are no more giving it nourishment. It dies its own natural death. The greatest moment in life is when your mind is transcended, when you know yourself, that you are more than your mind -- then anxieties, anguish, meaninglessness, all disappear.

I am not a psychologist. Psychologists need to learn much and they can learn only if they understand that there is something more than psychology in man -- that he has a soul.

And I am not a philosopher either. It has been one of the most unfortunate things that the Eastern concept of darshan has been translated into English as philosophy. Even people like Doctor Radhakrishnan... but these are all professors, they are not mystics. They have agreed with this translation -- I disagree. Because philosophy means `thinking about truth', and one thing that is impossible in the world is thinking about truth. It is like a blind man thinking about light. How will he think? And whatever he thinks, is not going to be even close to the experience of light. Light either can be seen or not seen, but you cannot think about it.

You cannot think about love. Either you can love, or you cannot, but you cannot think about it.

I am not a philosopher, I am a mystic. I have not thought about truth, I have seen it. And the strangest thing about truth is that to see it is to be it. You cannot see it as an object, you can see it only as yourself. The moment you experience yourself -- when the observer and the observed are one, when the seer and the seen are one, when the experienced and the experiencer are one -- truth is revealed.

Western philosophy has been the longest exercise in futility. None of the Western philosophers -- Plato, Aristotle, Bacon, Kant, Hegel, Russell -- none of the Western philosophers has had even a glimpse.

Their whole story is written in PANCHTANTRA which is five thousand years old. In a village, one elephant comes for the first time and the village has five blind men. They are excited, more excited than the people who have eyes, naturally, because those who have eyes can see, then the excitement is gone.

Those five blind people are so excited to find out what it is that has come.

They touched the elephant, somebody touched the legs and said, "My God! The elephant is nothing but a pillar."

And somebody touched the ears of the elephant and said, "You idiot! You must be touching some pillar. The elephant is not a pillar, it is like a big fan which is used by kings." and so on and so forth. All five were quarreling, and a man who had eyes was watching and laughing.

The whole Western philosophy is written in that story. All these blind people are touching and coming to conclusions and quarreling with each other. And Western philosophy is nothing but argumentation -- not realization. Hence the Western philosopher will remain just an ordinary man. He will have great ideas, he will make great systems, but his own personality, his own individuality, will remain very ordinary. He cannot become a Gautam Buddha, he cannot become a Lao Tzu, he cannot become a Chuang Tzu, because these are not philosophers; these are people who have tried to see within, to reach to the very center of their being.

And the center of my being is also the center of every being, it is the center of the whole universe. Hence if I can know myself I have known all.

I do not want to be categorized as a philosopher. It is not my thinking about truth that I am sharing with my people, it is my experience that I am sharing. It is not my idea -- it is my taste, it is my heartbeat. If you want to call me anything you can call me a mystic, but please drop that ugly word godman.

UNLIKE THE SPIRITUAL MASTERS OF THE PAST WHO WERE GRIM IN THEIR SAYINGS AND SELDOM LAUGHED, YOU'VE ALWAYS DISPLAYED A GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR. PLEASE COMMENT. AND PLEASE CAN YOU TELL ME YOUR FAVORITE JOKE!

A sense of humor is my basic contribution to religiousness. All religious people have been sad and serious and sick. You cannot live with them. That's why people simply touch their feet and run away, because they are so boring. Just sitting by their side a little while, you will start feeling bored too.

I am always thinking that if there is a heaven where these saints and sages and mahatmas have all reached, then I don't want to go there, because that will be the saddest place in the whole existence. And everybody will be trying to be sadder than the other.

A sense of humor is something especially human. Buffalos don't laugh, they are all saints. Donkeys don't joke, they are all mahatmas. In their past lives they have been saints and mahatmas. That's why they have attained such a great status.

These are the people who will go to heaven. If after death you are asked where you want to go, please remember to say, "Wherever you want to take me, take -- but I don't want to go where saints go!" Even hell will be better. You will find superior, finer, more juicy people.

Now the joke. And because it has been asked for by a journalist it is about three journalists. All three were retired: one was eighty, another was eighty-five, and the third was ninety. It was their usual habit to go for an evening walk, sit in a public park and discuss the golden old days.

One day it happened that the first journalist, who was eighty, said,"I feel so ashamed, it hurts. It is like a wound."

The other two said, "What happened? Who has hurt you?"

He said, "Nobody has hurt me. Just I was caught red-handed."

They both said, "You are making a mystery of it. Simply tell us the whole thing!

What happened?"

He said, "I was caught red-handed by my mother."

They said, "At what?"

He said, "Now, how to say it? I was peeping through the keyhole when a beautiful woman was taking a bath and my mother caught me. I feel ashamed."

The two other guys laughed. One said, "Son, don't get disturbed, it happens to everybody. In childhood everybody looks into keyholes, into bathrooms, and what else to do? Keyholes are made for that. Beautiful ladies are made for that.

Don't feel ashamed -- we have all been caught but that doesn't mean that...."

The man said, "You don't understand at all. You go on saying to me, "Don't feel ashamed, don't feel ashamed." It is not a question of childhood! It happened today!"

Then there was silence. This was too much, if it happened today.

The second one said, "Yes, we can understand. I will tell you my story which will give you consolation. It is now the third day that I have not made love to my wife. She is such a bitch that whenever I mention love she immediately turns to the other side and says, 'I have a headache, enough is enough. Now no more.'" The other two laughed now. The third, the oldest, said, "Do you know his love?

First tell what you mean by love!"

He said, "It is a very simple process. Every night I take her hand in my hand and press it three times. By that time I am fast asleep and snoring. But for three days the bitch won't allow me to make love. I can understand you are feeling ashamed, hurt. I am feeling hurt. My own wife, at this age, is betraying me!"

The third man said, "What is happening to me will make you forget all your troubles. This morning when I started making arrangements to make love to my wife she said, 'What are you doing?'

"I said, 'What am I doing? I am just doing what should be done. I am trying to make love.'

"My wife said, 'You idiot! This is the fourth time in the night! Neither you sleep nor you let me sleep! Love, love, love... there is no limit to it.'

"I said, 'My God, that means my memory is going. I had completely forgotten that three times already I have made love.'

"And you are talking about your troubles. Think of my trouble, my memory disappearing. At least it is good I can still make the distinction between day and night."

So everybody has his problems.

To look at a problem with humor is human. Except for human beings no animal can laugh. And your religions have been preventing you from laughter.

In the schools they teach the three R's; I teach the three L's... Life, Love, Laughter.