Darshan 1 November 1976

[A sannyasin says: I feel if I don't ask you whatever comes up - every week almost something new comes up - I'll go off the track; I'll go off on some incredible ego trip.] Mm, mm. Even the fear of going in a wrong direction is an ego trip. Why are you so afraid of being in a wrong situation? - because the wrong situation is very ego shattering and the right situation is very ego enhancing. In fact to think of the future is to think in terms of the ego. So remain with the moment If it is needed for your growth - that you should go in a wrong direction - it will happen.

And you cannot avoid it, because avoiding it will be avoiding your own growth. You cannot avoid anything. So whatsoever is available, enjoy it to your total capacity; respond to it totally. Let this moment give all that it can give to you. And the next moment is going to be born out of this moment If this moment has been rightly lived, from where will the next moment come? It will grow out of this moment. It is going to take on the same quality. It is going to be a continuity with this moment. The next moment is not coming out of the blue. It grows out of you like a leaf grows out of the tree. It comes from your roots... it is nourished by your life juice. So if this moment is lived rightly.... And when I use the word 'rightly', I don't mean in the sense puritans use it; I don't mean the meaning that moralists will like to enforce on it.

To live rightly means to live totally. It is not being virtuous; it is just being whole. The right is not against wrong or against sin. The right is only against being partial. Don't be partial, don't be fragmentary. And the right has nothing to do with any goal, any perfectionist's ideal. The right has something to do with the feel of this moment If you feel good, it is right. Easy is right. Happiness is right So celebrate this moment, enjoy this moment, delight in this moment - and the tomorrow will take care of itself. Think not of the morrow. The moment you start thinking that you may go wrong, that

you have to go right, the ego has entered. It is the ego that is worried about its decoration - morality, good, virtue, respectability... some shoulds. So just remain with the moment, as much as possible and everything will go right If this moment is right, everything is going to be right This is the definition of being right if you are happy in this moment nothing is going to be wrong.

Happiness is a sure indication that things are flowing with the total; you are one with the universal.

Happiness arises only when there is a harmony between you and the whole... when there is no conflict, when there is no pain. Then there is sheer joy - and the joy is incredible because you cannot even find any cause to it. You cannot explain why it is there. It is there unexplained, and it is utterly there, for no reason at all; it is simply there. It is there like a mystery. So live in the moment and by and by start dropping these tensions of the future. If you go wrong, you go wrong; nothing is wrong in it. Don't be a coward - be courageous. In life a few wrong things happen. In fact they are part of life.

You cannot weave a cloth unless the thread is put in such a way that each thread is crossed by another thread, the vertical is crossed by the horizontal; otherwise the cloth will not exist. A good man is simply good. He is a heap of thread; he is not a cloth. A bad man is simply bad. He is again a heap of thread; not a cloth. A whole man is both. He accepts God and devil both, day and night both. And in that acceptance is transcendence. In the very acceptance you are neither good nor bad. You have gone beyond both; you become a witness. And that's what real sanctity is.

So don't try to be good and don't try to be right. Don't try to avoid the wrong and don't try to avoid the bad, because then your life will lose all salt. You will become tasteless. Saints are tasteless - at least so-called saints. A real saint has tremendous contradictions in him; he is paradoxical. He is both sweet and bitter. He is as dark as the darkest night and as full of light as the noontime. He's simple like a child. You can almost call him a fool. That's what Saint Francis used to call himself - and he is as wise as there is the possibility to be.

In the Old Testament there is a saying: The wiseman, the perfect man, is as cunning as the snake and as innocent as the dove. This is the contradiction - as innocent as the dove and as cunning, sly, as the snake - but both meet, and in that meeting both change their qualities; in that meeting both negate each other. When both the plus and minus come together they negate each other. And out of that negation a zero experience is born. When God and devil meet they negate each other. They are equal forces, and when they are negative, you are empty. That emptiness is absolute. It knows no limit; it is immeasureable. And in that emptiness is what in the East we have called the witness, the witnessing consciousness.

My whole effort here is to help you to become that emptiness. So I am not worried about going wrong. Sometimes it is good to go wrong. It is very good to go astray sometimes. It is not always good to remain good, so don't be worried about that. It is as it should be. Nature takes its own course. Simply remain with the moment. Live the moment with your total being involved in it, committed to it, absorbed in it. Become drunk with the moment, and then whatsoever happens will be good. Even if it is not good, it will be good. At least eventually it will prove to be good. Even if you go wrong sometimes, finally you will find that that was also part of being right. It was needed.

Life is really a mystery, and the mystery is because of this paradox.

If you love somebody and you are together for twenty-four hours, your love will lose charm, the magic will be gone. But sometimes you are separated. You fight; you go on your own way. When you are separated, again a desire to meet arises. Again you come... you come fresh. The old is dissolved by the fight. You have become discontinuous with the past. Now it is a new moment again - fresh, young, virgin. You fall in love again. You will fight again.

One day when you look at the whole phenomenon you will see that fight was part of love - otherwise love would have died long before. It was the fighting that wouldn't allow it to die. The fight creates separation, the separation creates desire to be together again. You come together again. In being together again there comes a moment when it becomes flat, becomes monotonous. Again a desire to separate arises. You move again... you fight for small excuses. That's why lovers always say, 'We have been fighting but there is nothing much to fight about.' In fact when they look, when they think about it, it seems ridiculous. The reason seems to be absolutely absurd, or so tiny - but that is not the point. They don't know the real reason. The real reason is that they want to create hunger again. Separation gives hunger.

This is how it goes - exploding, imploding, exhaling, inhaling. This is how it goes - happiness, unhappiness; good and bad, right and wrong. So don't be worried about it. Simply trust life. I teach you trust - trust in life. So if sometimes life leads you into some wrong ways, go. Don't resist that moment; just go totally so whatsoever life wants you to learn from that experience is learned, and you can come out again.

In Jesus' life he used the parable of the prodigal son very much. That's what I am saying. A man had two sons and he divided his property among these two - half and half. One remained with the father - was a good young man, very virtuous, obedient, served his father, increased the money that had been given to him, was respected by everybody. But the other, the younger one, left the town.

He gambled, he drank; he moved in wrong company. He destroyed all his money, he destroyed all his character, he destroyed his health.

One day news came that he had become a beggar. The father sent a message that there was no need for him to become a beggar; he could come back home. The son came back and the father arranged a big feast for him. The fattest lamb had to be killed and the best wine from the cellar had to be brought. He invited many guests to receive the son on his coming back.

Somebody went to the field where the older son was working hard in the hot sun, and said, 'Look at the injustice! A lamb was never cut for you. The old wine was never brought for you, a feast was never given for you. Nobody gathered to welcome you. Now look what has happened! This is absolutely partial. And that vagabond who has destroyed the whole money earned by your father with much hard labour is coming back a beggar. His whole life savings he gambled. Now he is coming like a beggar but he is going to be received like an emperor!'

Of course the son felt bad. He came home and he said to the father, 'This is too much!' And the father laughed and he said, 'You are with me so there is no need for any welcome. Not that I love you less, but the one who was lost is coming back. He needs love, he needs acceptance. He has to be welcomed. It is not unjust to you. He is wounded and he needs rest and love. Love will be his treatment.'

So nothing wrong in.... What Jesus is saying through this parable is that those who go astray will also be received by God. They will be really welcomed. This parable is very dangerous. It says that those who are good, they are just so-so - but those who are bad, once they come back home they are going to be received with a great feast because they took the risk of going astray. They are becoming grown up. They have become more experienced, they are more mature. They staked their life, they risked their life. They were lost, and they are being reclaimed.

So never be afraid that something may go wrong. Simply trust. If it goes wrong, that's what is needed. Go prayerfully into it and you will see that your prayer, your acceptance, your trust, has changed the whole quality of it. It has transformed it utterly. The wrong also becomes right when you trust life. And when you don't trust life even right becomes wrong. So it is not a question of right and wrong.

And whenever you have a question, ask. Don't be worried about it - whatsoever it is. Mm? Good.

[A sannyasin, who is a dancer, says: Since I came to Poona I have been sick four times. There is no desire to do any activities. I thought I was going into a more devotional path but now I think I can go into meditation.] Mm, mm. A few things to be understood. First: this moment is precious. When energies start moving inwards and one wants to be just alone, silent, and everything seems to be distraction - even one's own hobbies, one's deepest interests, even they look like distractions - this moment comes.

Energies are simply moving inwards. But you have to do one thing: enjoy this inner movement of the energy but keep in contact with your music and your dancing, because soon, when this process has ended, you will move into another phase when the energy will move outward. It is an inner rhythm.

When it moves outward, if you don't keep contact things will become difficult. So right now give as much time as you like for simply sitting but keep a minimum contact at least with your dancing, your music, your training. Fix a few hours. For those few hours completely forget about this inner-going energy. That will keep you in balance and it will be very paying.

If for example you give four hours in twenty-four for your music and dancing, then twenty hours are yours. If you give these four hours - which will be a little difficult because the energy is moving inwards, and you are going outwards - this will make you capable of certain things in the future.

When energy moves outwards you will be able to give at least four hours for inner work, and that will become a balance.

It is just like the symbol of yin-yang. The symbol is in a circle... as if there are two fish - one is white, one is black - and each are turning into the other. But the deepest symbol in it is that the white fish has a black dot in it and the black fish has a white dot in it. These are the four hours I am talking about. When the energy is moving inwards you are a white fish, but let there be a black dot; that will keep you in balance. When energy is moving out you will be a black fish, but then let there be a white dot in it; that will keep balance. Otherwise both will fall apart.

And once a person starts falling apart, it is dangerous. It has happened to many people. All the old monasteries are full of people who have completely forgotten how to get out. And that is not good - because silence is good, but if you cannot get out.... If out of your silence a song is not born, then

it is dead; it is barren. You remain a seed and you never flower. You have something but you never share.

Silence is good. It is good only because it can become the womb for a song. And song is also good, because song can be possible only if there is silence within. So one has to keep balance. It is exactly like a tightrope walker. When you see that you are falling towards the left, start leaning towards the right. Right now you are falling inwards; keep a little leaning towards the outer. Otherwise you can turn into a monk in a month - and that is a wastage. One person becomes useless again. It is uncreative.

There are people who live only in the outside. They create much noise but no music comes out of them because music needs grounding in silence. They make much fuss in the world. The politicians, the generals, the money-mad people - they make really much fuss in the world. They have caused the world to be in a neurotic state, but nothing comes out of them. And people who have renounced the world, they don' t make any fuss. They keep quiet but their quietness is dead.

My approach towards life is paradoxical because life is paradoxical. I would never like you to move into one extreme totally. Keep contact with the other; always keep balanced. And always remember that whenever one process is becoming too much, start leaning towards the other process.

So continue - you have to create a discipline. Decide to put aside a few hours for your dance, for your singing, music, and the remaining is for your inner being, so let it move there. After a few weeks, one day suddenly you will see that the tide is turning, the climate is changing. And when the climate changes, again you have to keep balance. Those four hours that you were giving to music and dancing have to be given to meditation; and then you can give twenty hours to the outside activity.

But this has to be the balance.

Always remember the yin-yang symbol - it is really beautiful. But the most important part is the white dot in the black fish and the black dot in the white fish. Then one is together - and that togetherness brings strength, that togetherness is power.

The oldest jewish word for God is Elohim. It comes from the same root as the mohammedan word for God, 'Allah'. It comes from the root el. El means power. Elohim means the one who is powerful.

Allah also means the one who is powerful. Allah is the totality of the whole universe - all yin, all yang meeting, all feminine, all male energy meeting, life and death meeting. That is the total energy of Allah, Elohim, God.

The same can happen on a small scale. Man is a miniature, a small yin and yang. You can become a small circle, but the moment you become a small circle, you become powerful, and suddenly all God's power is yours. So just keep balance. Balance is the word to be remembered.

And the illness may be part of this process, because you have lived a very outward life. You have lived actively and now suddenly you are moving into an inactive and passive, meditative life. That change is too much. It can make you ill many times; the body will need adjustment. So if you keep outside contact you will not fall in so easily. But continue, otherwise you will lose much and I don't want you to lose anything. When we can gain everything without losing anything, why be foolish?

Meditation is possible with your dancing; there is no problem in it. In fact, it is more easily possible than for a non-dancer.

I make people dancers who don't know anything about dancing. You know much about it, you have a feel for it; you have a potential for it. You should not lose contact. Mm? Good!