The significance is not in the goal but in the journey
[A new sannyasin says he's been doing zen meditation for two years... he was frustrated; it was only discipline.]
It is... but we will change it. Once you have passed through a few cathartic groups, you will start enjoying the same zen meditation.
The technique is very significant but one has to approach it in a right way. Sometimes the right thing also turns into a wrong thing if you are not ready for it; if you are ready for it then things are different.
Zen simply approached without any catharsis, without any primal therapy, encounter, and things like that, is just discipline - dry, dull, boring, frustrating. But once you have gone through catharsis, you have thrown out all the rubbish that one naturally carries, then those same techniques will fit and will be of tremendous significance. So do a few groups here, mm?
And right now stop your zen meditations. When you are ready I will tell you to start, and you will see the difference then, mm? First one has to get ready. Zen is very very significant but you have to be ready for it. You started without getting ready - that's why it has been frustrating.
[Osho explains the meaning of deva sandhan: god, the goal - and unless god is the goal one remains frustrated. Joy arises only when there is significance in your life... when each act contributes to its total quality... when you move in a direction and you feel that something is growing, one is arriving somewhere.... ]
There are three kinds of goals: one, the very very small range goal, the mini-goal. One is feeling hungry and one wants to eat - that's a mini-goal; within an hour, once you have eaten, it is finished.
Again after eight hours you will feel hungry and again it will be there - thousands of times it will come and go - it is a mini-goal. It gives satisfaction; not fulfilled it gives dissatisfaction but nothing arises out of it. In itself it is meaningless - one can go on eating and defecating, eating and defecating, but life has no sense.
Then there are short-range goals: one wants to become a doctor or one wants to become an engineer or one wants to become a wife or a husband or a mother - small range goals; they help a little bit. For a few days or for a few months or for a few years, one has a certain aim and one has drive but once one becomes a doctor, then what? Suddenly one falls flat and then comes to feel that it doesn't make much difference whether you are a doctor or an engineer or a carpenter - it only helps your mini-goals: you can get food, shelter, a car. So the short-range goals only help mini-goals and mini-goals are meaningless. Naturally the short-range goal is also not of much use....
God is the really major goal, the only ultimate goal. There are mini-goals and minor-goals but god is the ultimate goal. And the beauty is that you are always coming closer and closer but you never really come. It is never exhausted, hence it is the ultimate goal.
You will be growing towards it and you will find every day that you are coming closer, and the closer you feel, the more happy. But it never happens that one day you can say that now you have arrived.
If you have arrived, it was not the ultimate goal - it was again a short-range goal, the second type of goal. Then again the question will come: now what?
God is the goal that is never achieved, hence it always remains significant. The significance is not in the goal but in the journey... but the goal makes the journey possible. So one should choose a goal that can never be achieved really, the impossible should be chosen... and god is the impossible goal, the absurd goal. We call it a 'goal' because we try to achieve, but it is not the goal because it is never achieved, hence it is the absurd goal, and only a very few courageous people choose it.
Millions of people remain with the first type of goal - the mini-goal - eating, drinking, merrying.
The other kind of people, a minority, choose slightly bigger goals: becoming famous, becoming a president of a country, a doctor, a scientist, a poet, a painter - things like that. But that is a minority, not more than five percent of people; ninety-five percent remain with the first, five percent choose the second type.
Very rarely does a person choose the meta-goal, the ultimate goal. Great courage is needed...
almost absurd courage is needed. That is the meaning of your name, 'deva sandhan'.
[A sannyasin who is teaches martial arts in Taiwan says: I found in the encounter group I did, that certain emotions brought out anger, and I could see how to use T'ai Chi for love, but things like pain and fear, I cannot come in contact with.]
T'ai Chi can be used for many many things, and for this also, because each movement of the body can have some relevance to the emotions. That's why they are called 'emotions' - because they are connected with body motions: each emotion has a particular body gesture related to it, corresponding to it.
[Osho describes the James Lange theory that was evolved in the beginning of this century which proposes that in a situation that could be fear-provoking, it is the running away that causes fear, not the other way round. There is some truth in it, Osho says, because the fear and the running are deeply connected... ]
When you become angry your eyes have a certain gesture, your hands have a certain gesture, your teeth have a certain energy, your jaw is more aggressive; you are ready to destroy, to be aggressive.
The energy accumulates in the hands and in the teeth, because when man was an animal that was the only way to be angry. Still animals are angry with their teeth and with their nails; we still carry that mechanism.
If you try to be angry without using your hands and your teeth and your eyes, you will be in an almost impossible situation - you cannot be angry. That particular gesture in the body is a must. And what precedes what cannot be said, so lange is also true. In fact it is just like saying: 'Which comes first?
- the hen or the egg.' Does fear come first and then the gesture of being frightened, or does the gesture come and then the fear? They both come together; they are simultaneous.
You can work it out... but t'ai chi masters will not be of much help because they have not used it in that way. T'ai Chi has many potentialities which have not been used in the past. In fact, T'ai Chi has been used to repress, not to express.
All the eastern techniques are in a way repressive. Rather than expressing your anger, your sadness or your negativity, the techniques have been made in such a way that you can very very politely persuade them to go into the unconscious, to the basement.
So T'ai Chi masters won't be much help... but you can work it out on your own. Learn T'ai Chi from them but then you can work it out in a very cathartic way and you can throw negative emotions through T'ai Chi movements; they can be thrown out. You can develop that thing and it can be helpful for others too. It can become a new dimension in T'ai Chi. I have always been thinking that some time or other, that dimension has to be developed in t'ai chi. As it is, it doesn't exist right now.
So don't talk about it otherwise they will say no... because the east is very orthodox. They have a certain use and they have used it down the ages and they have become very fixed; they are not even exploring new possibilities.
The same is the case with yoga in India - it has become a frozen science: for three thousand years, not a single development. So is the case with T'ai Chi: for three thousand years not a single improvement. It remains exactly where it was three thousand years before... as if three thousand years have not passed.
The East is very very orthodox: once it finds that a certain thing works it uses it only in that way. The west is very very exploring, hence the West could reach from the bullock cart to the space jet. The East could not, the East still carries the bullock cart; it is the same bullock cart! In the same bullock cart Buddha was moving, in the same bullock cart Patanjali was moving, in the same bullock cart Lao Tzu was moving, and in the same bullock cart the East is still moving.
[The sannyasin asks: How to use the movements to cathart?]
Do it alone - don't talk to any t'ai chi master... the first thing, mm? Don't talk about that.... Just learn T'ai Chi with them and alone in your room try it.
Just stand, hold your energy in the hara, concentrate at the hara, and then just whatsoever you feel like... If it is anger, mm? - for example if it is anger, then just feel the energy arising from the hara taking the form of anger like flames, spreading all over the body. Then relax and let the body move with those flames.
You will find that gestures start - they may be more like latihan, subud, they will be more like subud movements. But if you know t'ai chi, they will take the t'ai chi form easily.
So just like flames - if you are thinking about anger, then think of flames.
[The sannyasin asks: Then you watch the movements and you trace them back?]
Yes, trace them back.... Trace the energy, yes, and just go with the energy and allow the energy to take its own shape and start moving.
By and by experiment and you will be able to fix the movements, that these are the movements that always come whenever you think of anger, and whenever you think of flames arising in you and taking shape, then this happens. But you try with anger for a few days so you come to an exact formulation. Then try with some other things - sadness, hatred, jealousy - but remember not to get confused. If you try with anger then try anger only for three weeks, so it settles. It settles so much that you can tell somebody else to do the movement and if he does the movement, he will suddenly say that anger is arising in him and anger is being thrown out. You follow me?
Then you try something else when you have come to a fixed pattern about anger. And whatsoever your negativities, you can search....
[The sannyasin says: In t'ai chi some of the forms take an hour - there are many many more movements. When you can separate the parts, when you link it together, you just let each one go out as it goes out?]
Simply let it go out, let it be dissolved into the cosmos. Don't make a circle, don't take it in; simply let it out. It moves into the existence and disappears... you have poured it into existence.
[The sannyasin asks: And this can also be done silently?]
Yes, quietly you can do it... you can find your own ways. These sciences - t'ai chi, yoga or things like that - are arts, not really sciences, and everybody can play around and find out their own ways.
One should be very very free about them. They are not very fixed things... they have great freedom in them.
So learn the art and then use it in your own individual way - give it your own flavour. And never become an orthodox follower of these things otherwise rather than helping they constrict you. They help in a certain limited way, but if you can improve upon them, innovate, then you can be benefitted tremendously.
Go and learn and experiment. Mm? I would like many people to go everywhere and learn everything and then innovate.
[The sannyasin asks: Osho, I have been doing this for nine years... in teaching it, is there not a danger of anger or something coming out and then it going very far?]
No, no danger, not at all... not at all. Catharsis is never dangerous - repression is always dangerous... and people never feel danger with repression, and with expression they always feel danger!
The very english word 'expression' is negative because people have never been allowed to express.
The word means express, it means 'squeezing out... ex-pressing'. It is not very positive: it is as if somebody is squeezing something out of you and you don't want it... just as you squeeze juice from the fruit and the fruit naturally does not want it. It is not a very positive word.
The sanskrit word for it is 'abivenjana' - it means flowering, like a bud opens... not squeezing but like a bud opening. Not that somebody is doing something to it - on its own accord it opens. It has a grace and beauty.
Repression has been the accepted mode - people have been taught to repress - and it has been thought that a repressed person, a controlled person, is a good person; there is no danger. And in fact this has created all the danger! The controlled, the repressed, is the most dangerous person in the world because he is carrying a volcano which is going to erupt one day or other.
There is a certain limit to which you can repress things, then they explode. If you don't express, they explode. If you express, you remain the master; when they explode they become the master. You are no more the master... the key is no more in your hands.
That's what madness is: explosion. Had you been expressing all these things there would have been no need for going into madness; madness is the last natural resort. The man has been repressing and nature comes to a point where it cannot tolerate it any more - it explodes. That is dangerous, when you explode in madness or you explode in violence: you murder or commit suicide.
Every ten years the society needs a great world war and small wars in between so we can explode.
This society is a dangerous society, it is a mad society... and the whole thing depends on repression.
With expression there is no danger because if you go on expressing you never accumulate these negative things inside: they never become a wound in you, they never grow like a cancer and they cannot spread over your whole being. You always remain the master.
A little anger here and there is not bad; it simply shows that one is alive, and if one is really alive, then even one's anger has a beauty to it. And it adds something to the personality, it enriches it; without anger something will be missing.
Mm? just think of Jesus with a whip in the temple, throwing the boards of the money-changers. That flair makes Jesus rich, gives him a quality of youth, of rebellion... makes him powerful. That anger is not bad - it is very creative. A little anger here and there, rightly used, gives a little salt to your personality. You are not without salt; you have some taste. But if the anger accumulates and then explodes like a cancer and pus starts oozing out all around, then it is ugly.
Repression is dangerous, always dangerous - expression, never. So whenever there is a choice always choose expression and help people to express. There is no danger....
[An ashram therapist says he's had an intermittent fever for the past few weeks with weight loss of forty pounds and a sensation of weakness. Osho checks his energy, and says that everything is okay... the energy is returning, and that he began to hypnotise himself into believing he was weak when he noticed he was losing weight.... ]
Once I told two young men - both were my students in the university - to go on a fast for seven days.
And one I had conditioned, talked to for a long time, that every day he would become stronger and stronger through the fast, and the other just the opposite, that he would become every day weaker.
They both had their minds conditioned, and it happened exactly the same way: after seven days one was really feeling younger - as he had never been. He was just flying... he was very alive and very very strong. The other was simply dead after seven days of continuously fasting and with the idea revolving in his mind that he was becoming weak, he was becoming weak....
And there are a few things which are very very suggestible. One is: when you are hungry you become very very suggestible - that's why many religions have used fasting as a process for hypnosis. When a person is hungry he is very suggestible; when a person is full he does not bother, he is less suggestible. When a person is hungry and empty he takes anything in - that's why he is suggestible. He wants anything to stuff in: anything you give he stuffs in, keeps it in the stomach... any idea and he will take it in. When a man's stomach is full he does not take things so easily; he does not swallow things so easily.
Poor people are very suggestible people - you can provoke them for anything: communism, fascism, anything, any nonsense idea can be put into their minds. Well-fed people are not so suggestible.
Karl Marx declared that rich countries would become communist first but he was proved wrong, his prediction went wrong - only poor countries started becoming communist; not a single rich country has turned communist - because he didn't know the basic idea of hypnosis. He must have known much about economics but economics is secondary as far as the mind is concerned; hypnosis is far more primary.
You cannot hypnotise a person who is living perfectly conveniently, comfortably, has good food, has good shelter, wife, children - you cannot hypnotise him.
Russia turned communist first... and that was the poorest country. Then China turned - it was again another poor country; now India, the third poorest country in the world can turn. Only poor people are suggestible. Marx was thinking that America would turn or Germany or England - they have not.
So when you are hungry, it is very easy to be hypnotised... or when you have not been allowed to sleep well you are very suggestible. Keep a man awake for three days, don't allow him to sleep, and he becomes absolutely suggestible.
So a few religions have used fasting and a few religions have used vigilance - both are tricks.
Mohammedans have used vigilance: keep alert the whole night and go on repeating a certain idea.
You can create your visions very easily.
Jainas have used fasting and Mohammedans have used vigilance but both are the same trick. Both are very very important. So hindus say to pray before you eat and to pray before you go to sleep.
Those two moments are very suggestible - put the idea in at that time. Before you eat, put the idea in the stomach and then eat; press it down with the food. And before you fall asleep, put the idea in; then it is very close to the unconscious. Fall asleep and then it goes on reverberating in the unconscious: the whole night the vibrations will be there and it will condition you.
When a person is ill he is more suggestible than when he is healthy. In these few months while you were losing weight, you became very suggestible and you continued to suggest to yourself the idea that you are becoming weak. And that is the western logic - if you are losing weight you are becoming weak; in fact it is not necessarily so.
If before the age of thirty-five you are losing weight maybe something is wrong, but after thirty-five it is perfectly good to lose weight because your body does not need so much weight.
So start suggesting to yourself that you are perfectly good and you will be perfectly good within a week. It is nothing, you have just put the idea in your mind. Start feeling good! Mm? follow emile coue - that you are getting better and better every day and feeling perfectly good. Enjoy and feel good! Weight is not the problem at all.
And if you feel good, soon you will come to your normal one hundred and sixty-five pounds; there is no problem in it. And I don't see that you should be troubled or anything. You need not go to doctors - you don't have anything. Just enjoy this lightness that has come.
[The sannyasin then says that he just stopped smoking recently after fifteen years.]
For three weeks you will be in trouble... at the most: Three weeks is the time for all kinds of mind change. If one can persevere for three weeks, then anything can be changed. The whole problem arises between those three weeks.
So just for three weeks remain alert and don't relax, and don't say that once in a while nothing is wrong. That 'once in a while' is more dangerous, because the continuity of the habit.... And it is good that you have dropped it.
But that too can give you a kind of feeling, mm? because there are chemicals in smoking, in tobacco, in coffee, in tea, which give you a false feeling of strength - just a false feeling; it is not true, it is just illusory. So when you stop that the illusion disappears. You have lived for fifteen years in that illusion; then suddenly you feel very very weak... but after three weeks it will go.
Things are good. Good.
[A sannyasin says she was counselling and running groups before she came here, but she didn't believe in the philosophy behind what she was doing. She says she believes in the philosophy here and wonders if there is a branch of psychology she can pursue that would be more in keeping with what is happening here.]
Really, nothing yet in existence; mm? - just a few beginnings in the West but nothing in particular that has taken the shape. There are a few beginnings here and there; many people are working and groping in the dark. Something is going to materialise soon but not yet. But in a way this is a very very potential situation. One can contribute much in these days of transition. The future of psychology is going to be altogether different to what it has been up to now: a great change is going to take over - almost a new birth for psychology. Any day it is possible: the coming twenty, twenty-five years, this last part of the century will see a new psychology being born.
So you cannot find a ready made thing, but in a way that is far better. You can help, you can become a contributor... and that is more exhilarating, more ecstatic, to contribute to the birth of a new science. You have been here - you will be going to the east now. Look! There are in the East many trends developed down the centuries. Just be an open mind and find out as many things and absorb them. And don't be in a hurry to formulate; first absorb, absorb as much as you can, digest as much as you can. And don't be worried whether two things are consistent or not - just go on absorbing. Out of the criss-crossing of many things, a synthesis arises on its own accord... not a synthesis made by you but it comes out of the meeting, the cross-breeding of many many trends.
So in the far East you will be moving.... India has worked down the centuries for at least five thousand years and has worked out a totally different outlook - a totally different image of man through yoga, tantra. In the far east, taoists have developed a totally different image of man... zen has evolved many things. And these techniques - T'ai Chi Chuan, Aikido, Karate - all have fragments.
Just go and absorb all of them, and soon you will start feeling new glimpses of new things fitting together; then start writing them and work out your own plan. That will be very very satisfying to you. Rather than borrowing a ready-made branch of psychology from somewhere, why not evolve one? That is more satisfying... and whenever a person evolves something on his own, it works miracles. In fact it is the man who works miracles, not the science.
My suggestion is - and this is my suggestion for everybody - always work a way out for yourself, and when you have found something on your own you will have tremendous power, and through that power you can help many people. So rather than borrowing, why not invent?
And these days are very pregnant... very few people are fortunate enough to live in such pregnant times. When a science settles then there is no scope for invention.
For example, it is very difficult to invent anything in mathematics: now the science is almost settling.
Only once in a century will a person be able to invent something - it cannot be a day to day thing:
once in a century, Albert Einstein. Now after Albert Einstein it will take a hundred years for another man of such genius to come to invent something that becomes an addition, a contribution.
To invent something in physics is more difficult - the science is settling - but with psychology the scope is infinite; nothing is settled yet. In fact psychology is still in the womb, the child is not born yet. There is great scope and great freedom.
So rather than looking for a settled thing somewhere, a ready-made formula, roam around the world... and the east has many things to teach. Remain acquainted with the western methodology and the eastern insight - eastern insight and western methodology, eastern heart and western reason. If they just criss-cross something very beautiful can come out of it... and that will be very satisfying, it will be a great contentment.
[A sannyasin, who has completed individual primal therapy, says he feels really cleansed and clear.
But he has to leave soon to do one year in the army... ]
In fact it can be a very very good training. If you take it positively it can be very good. It can give a tone to your personality, it can give you a certain integration. If you take it positively it can be of tremendous value but if you take it negatively it can be very destructive - it depends on you.
Otherwise one year of military can be very good.
One year live very surrendered, do things as you are ordered to, drop your mind completely. Thinking is not needed in the army - you can pull the head away. You can make that one year an experience of non-thinking, an experience of no head... and that can be very great experience for meditation....
My suggestion is - you do it. It is very good; after one year you will come back very very strong.
[The sannyasin says: I am a little afraid because I get very angry the minute somebody tells me....
I'm very sensitive.]
If you go with that idea, with anger, then it will be destructive. Then you will be continuously fighting and continuously angry and complaining and feeling bad and thinking 'Why have I come?' and 'Why has this been enforced?' then all those negative emotions will be very bad, like wounds, and you will carry those wounds your whole life, as if you have been humiliated.... That is your interpretation.
If you understand me, what I am saying is that you just go and for that one year remain surrendered.
There is no question to ask: whatsoever they say you follow... and that will give you an insight of surrender. Then you will be able to see: yes, the head can be put aside - and then it doesn't disturb at all. Then everything can be enjoyed.
And if you can enjoy it in the army, you can enjoy it anywhere then, because that is the worst place!
It is good to have the training in the worst place because then nothing can be worse than that. Mm?
you have lived in hell and happily; then finished... all hell is finished! Then wherever you are, you will always be in a better position.
In the ancient days that was one of the fundamentals of education. Even the sons of emperors and kings had to pass through very great hardships. They had to live the life of a very ordinary man, and they had to pass through all ordinary hardships; no special concession was given to them.
In the East, particularly in India, every child had to go to the forest to live with the master and for twenty years, twenty-five years, he had to go through all kinds of hardships. Food was not for taste but only for nourishment... no comforts, no luxury. After those twenty-five years of hard living, poor living, whatsoever life was going to give was a great joy - it was a very psychological experiment.
Whatsoever life was - a small hut, a bed to call your own, ordinary food - was great joy compared to those twenty five years. The whole life was full of joy because in the basement of life, they learned what hardship was. Now the whole thing has turned upside-down....
The student in the university lives in a very comfortable way, lives on government money, public money, lives like a prince, and then after twenty-five years comes into life and becomes a clerk or a station master... and life is never satisfying. It is always comparatively less than it was in the university. One is frustrated... one carries a continuous complaint and grudge. The university gives so many promises and all are shattered. The university gives so many hopes and nothing is fulfilled later on.
The eastern method was just the opposite: the university was not going to give any hope - the university was going to give you a hardship, as much as possible, as much as a man can tolerate.
Then whatsoever life was going to give was good, far better, and there was contentment.
That one year can be of tremendous education. My suggestion is - if you can go positively, go; if it is difficult to go positively, then avoid, don't go. But if you listen to me, my suggestion is always to go through as many experiences as possible. The army is an experience - a totally different kind of experience. It will not be available anywhere else. The experience of a civilian is one thing, the experience of an army man is totally different. He lives in a totally different world, and it is good to know it - that that world is also there.
And it is only a question of one year. Don't miss it! And after that, come here, so you will be coming fresh without a head and we start working on you, mm? See me before you go, mm? Good!