A master in your own right

(JUST BEFORE OSHO'S CAR COMES, A BIG BLACK GORILLA ENTERS THE HALL AND SITS BEHIND MANEESHA.)

Life has never been taken with such ecstasy, joy and bliss as Zen has done. The common religions of the world, Hinduism or Christianity, Mohammedanism or Jainism, are all too serious. And their seriousness keeps them imprisoned in words, in theories, in philosophies. Their seriousness does not allow them to laugh, to sing, to dance, to be merry. They have spoiled the whole of humanity, they have destroyed the laughter of every child who has been born.

It seems there is something in laughter of which our so-called society is afraid. It is afraid, because laughter is going to expose its hypocrisy. Then you will see laughter everywhere, because hypocrisy is all around; but society has forced you to be insensitive to it.

Now look, just by the side of Maneesha, a gorilla is sitting. Gorilla, sir, will you stand up?

That's good.

Soon it is going to be very difficult, if tigers and gorillas hear you - and they are bound to hear, be-cause here is a place where they can be respected.

So playful, so childlike, so non-serious, so alive is the approach of Zen.

It is perfectly good for tigers and lions and deer to come to this gathering. They will appear, for this gorilla is going to spread the news. Gorilla sir, please be silent, although it is not your way, neither is it in your nature; but please don't start gossiping about this temple. We don't want tigers and lions, because we don't have space. Just wait a little... once we have got a bigger space, which we will be getting, then you can bring all the gorillas - you must have friends, a wife, children. A gorilla does not believe in celibacy, he is not a Catholic monk.

And having a few gorillas here dancing with you will be a real joy. Today you will have to be satisfied with only one. But when one comes, a second will be close behind him.

Just a few miles from here there is an ancient lake, Tadoba, deep in the forests. Its beauty is its deer, thousands of deer. You just have to be there at the time when the sun sets, when thousands of deer come to the lake to have a drink. The beauty is, as it becomes darker - you will be puzzled - their eyes shine like candles, as if thousands of candles are moving all around the lake, in a line.

I would love every species to be represented here, but unfortunately there is not much space and when such great people as gorillas start coming... They are your forefathers, be respectful. This is not me, but Charles Darwin speaking.

This story about Hyakujo, when he became a master in his own right... When one becomes a master in one's own right, when one dissolves, when one is no more, but just a pure energy, a space, nothing is written in this space - no scripture, no sermon...

There exists only one book in the whole of the world's literature which can be called religious. It belongs to the Sufi tradition; for a thousand years it has been given from master to successor. The first master who had it, Jalaluddin Rumi, has not been surpassed by any other Sufi. He is the only man who has been called Mevlana - Mevlana means master of masters. He had this book, though nobody knows from where he got it. But he would not show it to anybody; he would not take it out.

He kept it hidden under his pillow and whenever he moved anywhere he kept the book with him.

The disciples asked - and he had hundreds of disciples - "Why don't you say anything about this scripture?"

And he always said, "It is impossible to say anything about this scripture. Ask about anything, but not about this scripture; it is a religious scripture."

They said, "If it is a religious scripture, then it should be given to us, so that we can understand what religion is."

Rumi said, "You will get it only when I die. Wait."

When he became old and was on his deathbed, rather than being shocked that their master was dying, they were all curious: "As soon as he dies, we can take out the book from underneath his pillow. While he is alive, he won't allow it."

Rumi died. Nobody bothered about him; they rushed to take out the book, opened the book and got a greater shock than at Rumi's death: the book was empty. They turned every page - perhaps somewhere something is written - but from the beginning to the last - it must have been three hundred pages - it was empty, nothing was written in it. And Rumi used to say to them, "This is a religious scripture; perhaps this is the only religious scripture."

To become a master in your own right means to dissolve like snowflakes into the thin air of silence.

Still, a certain space will remain throbbing within you; that is your truth, that is your Zen. And to jump from your body, from your mind to that inner space, unspoiled, untraveled, untrodden by anybody, you have taken the quantum leap. This quantum leap makes you a master in your own right.

HYAKUJO ASKED OBAKU WHERE HE HAD COME FROM.

OBAKU SAID, "FROM GATHERING MUSHROOMS AT THE FOOT OF MOUNT DAIYU."

Zen has a special language. I have been insistently reminding you not to take these words as ordinary; they belong to a different kind of consciousness.

When Hyakujo asked, "Where are you coming from?" he is asking, "Do you have a beginning?" If you have a beginning, then you will have an end, they come together. He is asking Obaku not about the place he is coming from, but the space in which he is.

"DID YOU SEE THE TIGER THERE?" ASKED HYAKUJO.

OBAKU ROARED LIKE A TIGER.

I don't know whether this gorilla can give a good gorilla shout.

(THE GORILLA SCREAMS LOUDLY.)

Don't make Maneesha afraid! Be a gentleman! It is a question of the dignity and respect of gorilla culture. Anyway, everybody is happy that you have come. I hope you will give a dance too at the end. So get ready.

This is a strange dialogue, but both have recognized each other, their mastership.

HYAKUJO SANG OUT AND LAUGHED. He has been slapped by a stranger. Rather than replying, he went out, sang and laughed AND WENT BACK TO HIS SEAT.

He informed his disciples that Obaku has also become a master in his own right: he has given the lion's roar.

The falling snow,

the sound of it, the dance of it,

that peace that it brings

and the coolness that comes through it...

the sermon is going on!

Without any word these snowflakes are already saying it. What is the need for me to go to the seat and to give you a sermon? If you have eyes, ears, if you have your senses open, from every corner, from all directions the sermon is coming to you. You just have to be silent enough to feel it, to touch it, to taste it. It is not a word, certainly: it is an utterly living, dancing silence.

When Obaku slapped Hyakujo, do you see the response? If somebody slaps you, are you going to dance and laugh? If somebody slaps you, if you are strong enough, you will give him a good slap in return. And if you are the weaker one, you will turn tail and escape.

A Christian missionary was teaching. His whole teaching consisted of a few things in which this statement of Jesus was always present: "If somebody slaps you on one cheek, give him the other one too."

He had been preaching for years and the statement was clear. But one day a man stood up and slapped the missionary. For the first time the missionary was in trouble. He could not understand, "What kind of person is this?" But according to his own teaching he had to be consistent. So he gave him the other cheek, thinking he would be kind, but the man wanted to test the missionary to see whether he was preaching a truth of his own, or just something borrowed. He slapped harder.

Now the story turns completely upside down. The missionary jumped on the man and started beating him. The man said, "What are you doing? Have you forgotten your sermon?"

He said, "Jesus only talked about turning your cheek once. Now forget that, come on, man to man!

To hell with Jesus! You have slapped me twice. I will kill you. That was only a sermon; you don't have to practice it; it's just a beautiful statement."

IT WAS SNOWING, AND THE MONK IN CHARGE ASKED HYAKUJO TO GIVE A SERMON.

In the first place Zen does not have any sermons; nor does it have any commandments, or discipline, or rules. It is a unique style of living so that you can come in contact with the divineness of existence itself.

Jews have ten commandments. Perhaps you know why there are ten. At that time, four thousand years ago, man used to count on his fingers. Ten is the ultimate figure, then there is repetition; for eleven and twelve, you are repeating another set of ten. You can go on repeating as many sets of ten as you want, but you cannot go beyond ten. Ten is the basic, because man learned arithmetic by counting on his fingers.

The story is that God created the world and went around asking the Babylonians, the Egyptians, the Arabs a single question, "Do you want a commandment?"

They all asked, "What is the commandment? Of course first we want to know what it is. In the dark we are not going to take anything."

And when he said, "Simple! Never, never look at another woman. Avoid all kinds of corruption."

The Babylonians said, "Then what else should we do? The whole joy of life will be gone. Keep your sermon to yourself."

The Egyptians did not ask, "What is the commandment?" They simply said, "Go ahead, find somebody else. Why should we listen to any sermon or any commandment? We are enough unto ourselves."

God was very sad; he has made these people and they are not ready to accept even a single sermon, a single commandment.

Finally he asked Moses, "Would you like to have a commandment?" And God forgot completely that a Jew responds differently from anybody else. Moses did not ask, "What is the commandment?" He asked, "How much does it cost?"

God said, "Absolutely free!"

Moses said, "Then why one? I will have ten!"

The poor Jews are carrying those ten commandments and from those ten commandments, Christians have borrowed, Mohammedans have borrowed... It seems there is some need in man that says to him that unless somebody else guides you, you will be lost. So he is always seeking guidance, without knowing the simple fact that in this world advice is the only thing which is given and never taken. You cannot become wise by asking wise people. The only way is to hear very closely the heartbeat of existence.

The poor Polack pope goes on kissing airports everywhere around the world. I would suggest to him that rather than kiss, please listen. Put your ears to the airport; that way perhaps you may hear something, but why taste it? Of course everywhere the taste is different. In India he tasted Hinduism for the first time when he tasted the cow dung. Stupid behavior! But it is thought he is very humble.

It is not true. Just a few days ago my secretary told me that he was in Brazil. The country is eighty percent Catholic, but that is all a formality.

In Greece I asked my sannyasins, "How many people are Greek Orthodox?"

They said, "Almost everybody is, ninety-two percent."

I asked, "How many people go to the church?"

They said, "Only four percent."

I said, "Are those four percent living or dead? Who are these four percent?"

They said, "Mostly old women, who have nothing else to do and the world wants to get rid of them."

It is only the priest who pays attention to them, because for that he gets his salary, that is his audience. He does not bother whether they hear or can hear; that is not important. He delivers the sermon; it is a profession.

But in these professions you will not find the truth. You will have to come closer to nature, not by touching airports, kissing airports. I have never read in any scripture that kissing airports is a religious duty. And this Polack pope thinks that this way he shows his humbleness.

Anando, my secretary, has brought the news that the Polack was very interested in Brazil, but very few people came to receive him at the airport. Where eighty percent of the people are Catholics, very few came to receive him. He was very angry. He asked the prime minister of Brazil, "What is the matter? Why has such a small group of people come?"

This is not humbleness... and he is wasting so much money. Each tour - and in a year he has three or four tours to different countries - each tour wastes eight million dollars, because people have to be brought to receive him. Everybody is in it as a business, "Unless you give a ten dollar note..."

Because of this fellow, for the first time the Vatican is in debt; before him, it was the richest religion in the world. But thirty million dollars per year have to be wasted and what do you see? You see the pope kissing the earth.

This seems a totally new way to connect directly with God. When I say, "Be in touch," I don't mean start kissing the earth. I mean become more sensitive to everything the universe consists of.

Open all your doors, drop all your fears and paranoia and let existence come like a breeze dancing in you, laughing in you... and you will know what cannot be said.

Question 1:

Maneesha has asked:

Maneesha, you are right. You can leave me, but I will follow like a shadow.

Wherever you go I will haunt your heart.

I will come in your dreams.

I will meet you in different places.

Wherever five sannyasins are meditating together, the sixth... I will be present. It is a promise.

(THERE IS LOUD LAUGHTER COMING FROM OUTSIDE BUDDHA HALL.) This must be Sardar. After the meeting, Sardar Gurudayal Singh, you have to encounter the gorilla who is sitting behind Maneesha. In fact he should sit behind you! Don't provoke him, he can be dangerous.

But Sardar cannot resist... he laughs wholeheartedly, without bothering whether it is time for laughter or not.

Now, for Sardar Gurudayal Singh and for our guest, the gorilla, if he can understand... If he cannot understand, at least he can understand your laughter.

Captain Fearless, the infamous pirate, is standing on the deck of his ship, 'The Dirty Doc' - that is the name of the ship. When the lookout calls, "Italian merchant ship ahead!" Fearless calls his cabin boy and says, "Bring me my red coat, we are going into battle." Soon the Italian ship is overpowered and that night there is a feast of spaghetti and garlic.

The next day Captain Fearless hears the cry, "Three German merchant ships ahead!" Fearless calls for the cabin boy. "Bring me my red coat," he cries, "we are going into battle."

Soon the German ships are captured and that night during a feast of beer and sausage the cabin boy asks, "Excuse me, Captain Fearless, sir, but why do you always ask for your red coat before battle?"

"In case I am wounded," cries Fearless. "Then my men won't see the blood and become disappointed or disheartened."

The next day the lookout cries, "A fleet of English warships ahead."

Fearless turns to the cabin boy and whispers, "Bring me my brown pants."

Sidney and Sadie have had a lovers' quarrel and they have not seen each other for two days.

Sadie is sitting moodily, staring out of the window when the phone rings. It is Sidney.

"I am coming over to your house tonight," he says.

"Oh no you are not!" snaps Sadie.

"And I am going to throw you on the bed," Sidney announces.

"Oh no you are not," says Sadie.

"And I am going to tear off your clothes," says Sidney, "and make love to you!"

"Oh no you are not!" says Sadie.

"And," says Sidney, "I am not even going to wear a condom!"

"Oh yes you are," says Sadie.

It is raining one afternoon, so Virgil, the ventriloquist, goes into a bar. As he opens the door a stray dog pushes past him, nearly knocking him over, and then it goes to sit down near the bar.

Virgil sits on a bar stool near the dog and orders a drink. When he is served, Virgil looks at the dog and then asks the bartender if he is interested in buying a talking dog for five hundred dollars.

The bartender laughs at the idea, but then the dog says, "Please mister, please buy me. This man is so mean to me, he doesn't look after me and never feeds me!"

The bartender is shocked. "Did you say you wanted five hundred dollars for him?" he says. "Why do you want to sell him?"

"I hate liars," replied Virgil, taking a drink.

The bartender hands over five hundred dollars and Virgil gets up and goes towards the door. "So long, you ungrateful creature," he says to the dog.

The dog looks up, "Ungrateful, is it?" says the dog. "Well, just for that, I am never going to speak again!"

Rupesh, give the first drum...

(Drumbeat)

(Gibberish)

Rupesh...

(Drumbeat)

Be silent, close your eyes

and gather your whole being in.

This is the quantum leap,

from mind to no-mind.

This space is you

and this moment is your only time.

In these two words

'here' and 'now',

the whole of religion is complete.

Rupesh, give the drum...

(Drumbeat)

You fall dead.

Utterly dead.

I am not telling you to stop your breathing; your body can go on breathing.

You be in,

deeper and deeper in!

Rupesh, the last drum...

(Drumbeat)

Everybody has to come back to life.

This is resurrection!

One special beat for the guest gorilla.

(Drumbeat)

No, Rupesh! Gorilla cannot understand it, do it totally!

(Drumbeat)

(RUPESH GIVES A REALLY GOOD DRUMBEAT AND THE GORILLA SHOUTS WITH JOY.)

Okay, Maneesha?

Yes, Osho.

Can we celebrate now?

YES!

(AFTER THE ECSTATIC YAA-HOO CELEBRATION, THE GORILLA STARTS DANCING WITH MANEESHA AND AFTER A WHILE SARDAR, COMING FROM OUTSIDE, JOINS THE DANCE.)