Fear Is A Beggar

There is no end to His grandeur. Whatever we say about it is so little as to betray our utter incompetence.

Rabindranath Tagore lay on his deathbed. An old friend sitting by his side said to him, "You can leave this world satisfied, you have accomplished whatever you wanted to do. You have attained great respect, you wrote many songs, and the whole world knows you as the divine bard. Really nothing is left undone."

Rabindranath opened his eyes, looked sadly at his friend and said, "Don't say such things. I was just telling God that all I wanted to sing is still unsung. What I wanted to say is still unsaid. My whole life has been spent merely tuning my instrument!" He felt he had not yet begun to sing His praise and already the moment to leave had arrived.

Rabindranath had written six thousand songs, all in praise of God. Yet he felt he hadn't sung a single word of His glory. Nanak also says the same thing and this is the experience of all the rishis who have known. Whatever is said about Him is only like adjusting the instrument; His song can never be sung. Who will sing it? How can one limited personality contain the boundless expanse? How can you hold the skies in your fist? All our efforts prove futile and only after trying totally can we realize our incompetence.

Only when you realize how insignificant you are can the understanding of His greatness take root.

Fools always think themselves great; wise men are aware of their smallness. As understanding increases the feeling of being too small, too insignificant, parallels the sense of His vastness and all-pervading presence. A moment comes in this quest when you are completely lost, and only He remains.

The speaker is lost - what is there to say? Only he remains: His glory, His grandeur, His endless resonance. The seer is lost; only the seen remains. You are extinct, completely annihilated; then who will give tidings of Him? Whatever discussions men have had about God have been hopeless.

When a tremendous event occurs we are struck dumb; when a person reaches God he becomes speechless. Not only is speech lost, but the very breath stops. You stop completely at the moment of knowing Him: neither thoughts move, nor words, nor breath, nor does the heart beat. Even a single heartbeat would deprive you of His sight, that slight trembling can produce a separation.

In just such a moment of speechless silence, Nanak has uttered these words. They are not to teach others, but to express his own helplessness.

THERE IS NO END TO HIS VIRTUES, NOR TO THEIR NARRATION.

THERE IS NO END TO HIS WORKS AND HIS BOUNTY, AND ENDLESS WHAT HE SEES AND HEARS.

THERE IS NO KNOWING THE SECRETS OF HIS MIND; THERE IS NO BEGINNING OR END TO IT.

SO MANY STRUGGLE TO KNOW HIS DEPTH, BUT NONE HAS EVER ACHIEVED IT; As long as you feel you have known God, you are under an illusion - you err. For whatever you have known cannot be God, whatever you have measured cannot be God, whatever you have fathomed cannot be God. You must be diving into some lake; you are nowhere near the ocean. You have gone into some insignificant valley; you have not known the abysmal depths where falling is endless. You must have climbed some nondescript hill on the outskirts of your village; you have no knowledge of His Everest where climbing is impossible. We have succeeded in climbing the Everest of the Himalayas, though with great difficulty, but to scale His Everest is unthinkable.

Why is it impossible? Try to understand how inconceivable it is to gauge or understand God.... we are a part of Him. How can a part know the whole? I can hold everything of this world within my hand, except myself. How can I hold myself in my own hand? My eyes can see everything under the sun, but how can they look at me? They cannot see me completely for the simple reason that they are a part of me, and the part can never know the whole; it may get glimpses but not the complete picture.

The difficulty is that we are a part of this vast expanse. Had we not been a part of God we would have known Him; had we been distinct and separate from Him, we could have gone around Him and investigated. But we are a part of Him; we are His very heartbeat, His breath! How can we go around Him? How can we grasp Him? Man is but a particle of sand in this vast expanse, a drop in the ocean. How can this one lonely drop contain the whole ocean? How can it know the entire ocean?

This is very interesting: the drop is in the ocean and the drop is the ocean. So in a very profound sense, the drop knows the ocean, because the ocean is not different from the drop. And yet in another sense it cannot know the ocean because the ocean is not separate from it. This is the biggest paradox of religion: we know God and yet we do not know Him at all. How can this be when He throbs in us and we in Him? We are not far from Him; in fact there isn't the slightest distance between Him and us.

So in a sense we know Him well; and yet we do not know Him at all, because we are a part of Him.

How can a part know the whole? We dive in Him, we float in Him, live in Him; at times we forget Him and sometimes we remember Him. Sometimes we feel ourselves very near Him and sometimes far.

In clear moments we feel that we have known Him. When the heart gets over-filled, we know that we have known, because we have recognized Him. Wisdom comes, then again it is lost and there is deep darkness. Then we falter again. But this very state of knowing and not knowing is the basic condition of a religious person.

When anyone questioned Buddha about God he would keep silent. What could he say?

Contradictions cannot be spoken about. If he were to say, "I know," he would be making a mistake, because who can say that he knows? And if Buddha were to say he did not know, he would be making a false statement, because who knew more than he!

Early one morning a very learned pundit came to Buddha to ask about God. Buddha remained silent. Soon the pundit left. Ananda asked Buddha why he had not answered, since the pundit was a man who knew a great deal and deserved an answer. Buddha said, "Just because he is deserving, it is all the more difficult to give him an answer. If I said I have known Him, it would be wrong, because without knowing Him completely how could I claim to know Him at all? I I said I did not, that too would be false. All claims derive from the ego and the ego can never know Him. Since he is deserving and intelligent and understanding, I had to keep silent. He understood. Did you not see him bow before he left?"

Then Ananda remembered how the pundit was so grateful that he bowed reverently at Buddha's feet. "How wonderful! Did he really understand? That never occurred to me."

Buddha replied, "Horses are of three types. The first type you hit with a whip and they will move, inch by inch. The second type you need not whip; just threaten them and they move. For the third, you need not even crack the whip; just the shadow of the whip sets them going. The pundit belongs to the third type. I had only to show him the shadow and he started on the journey."

Words are the whips; silence is the shadow. Words are needed, because it is the rare horse that responds to the shadow of the whip. The condition of one who knows is such that he cannot say he knows, and he cannot say he does not know. He is in between knowing and not knowing.

Nanak says He is without end. Whatever you say of Him is too little. You keep on saying and yet you find that there is so much to say that you have hardly said anything. All expressions regarding Him are incomplete. And all scriptures are incomplete; they are meant for the horses who don't respond to the shadow of the whip.

THERE IS NO END TO HIS VIRTUES, NOR TO THEIR NARRATION.

THERE IS NO END TO HIS WORKS AND HIS BOUNTY.

As religion penetrates a person more and more profoundly, he begins to see His various works and also His beneficence.

His works are manifested all around us but most people are blind to it. They say, "Where is God?

Who is the creator?" Seeing the creation around them, they are blissfully unaware of the creator!

They persist in asking,"Is there a hand behind all this creation? Who could it be?" They are stone- blind, they cannot visualize the hand that has produced this vast creation. The irony is that in other respects they accept and believe blindly.

To date no one has seen the electron with the naked eye. Science says that the electron is the last particle of electricity. As the basis of the world of matter, its various combinations have given rise to the earth. But so far no one has seen the electron, nor is there any hope of seeing it. Then how can scientists believe in the electron? They say that its effects, its results, prove its existence.

The cause is subtle, the effect is gross. We cannot see the hand of God, but we can see His works.

We believe in the existence of electrons because we see the results. Yet we deny the existence of God whose proof lies all around us. The flower opens; some hidden hand must make it bloom, or else how can it? The seed breaks but someone must break it; when the hard shell cracks the tender plant appears bearing delicate flowers.

Everywhere we see His handwriting, but the hand cannot be seen. The hand is not visible because there is a balance between the subtle and the gross. The cause is always subtle; the result is always gross. We cannot see the cause. God is the highest cause, but His handiwork is evident all around us.

So there are three types of people - the three types of horses according to Buddha. first are those who cannot even see His handiwork, they are so blind! They ask: "What is God? Who is the creator?

What proof is there? If the vast creation all around us is not enough for them, if they cannot see His hand behind all creation, what else will make them understand?

What greater proof is there than that life moves in a consecutive and balanced order? There is no disjunction anywhere within this enormous leela, this play. It is a continuous flow. Night and day the music of creation plays its enchanting melody. Everything happens as it should. The universe is not a chaos, but a cosmos; it is not happening by chance but by a well-determined law working all the time.

This law is referred to as dhamma or dharma. Lao Tzu calls it tao, the way; Nanak calls it hukum, divine order. When Nanak says hukum do not imagine that He is standing somewhere issuing orders. Hukum means the universe is an order, not a chaos. Things do not happen here haphazardly. An ordering hand is in everything, providing a purpose behind each event. All happenings are directed towards their ultimate development.

If you have no eyes for creation you are totally blind. There are many who cannot see the hand behind creation. When you see a small picture or statue and you ask who made this, you never for a moment think it may have been formed by chance. But such a vast painting hangs all around you, each leaf a work of His genius, and you cannot see Him behind all this? You must simply have made up your mind not to see Him; you have resolved to turn your back towards Him as if you feel there is some danger and you are afraid.

Certainly the fear is there. No sooner do you recognize His hand behind the canvas of this vast creation than you are a changed person; you cannot remain the same. Whoever hears even the faintest murmur of the divine music in creation has to alter his life, because once you begin to see His hand behind everything, you cannot continue to do what you have been doing; it all appears wrong.

As long as you pretend He doesn't exist you can sin, misbehave, mistreat others, and give yourself full freedom to indulge in any evil; as soon as His hand appears to you that freedom is lost. Then you have to think twice before you act and pay more attention to remembrance, to remembering God, because now you know that He sees, that He is present. He is in and around everyone, everything.

Whatever you do to anyone, you do to Him. If you pick someone's pocket, it is His pocket you pick; if you steal, you steal from Him; if you kill, it is Him you kill.

Most human beings turn a blind eye towards Him. Once aware of His presence, you can no longer remain as you are; you will have to change at your very roots. This change is so sweeping that many prefer to avoid all the trouble, so they deny God and remain as they are.

A hundred years ago Nietzsche declared: "God is dead. Now man is totally free." It is exactly for this freedom that you deny God, because then you are at liberty to do as you please. There is no one to decide for you. You are unrestrained, independent. He who is self-willed and independent persists in denying God no matter how much you try to convince him. It remains easy to deny Him because the gross handiwork can be seen, but the subtle hand remains invisible.

So people say:"Creation happens by itself; everything happens on its own." But this is the definition of God: He who happens on His own, who is swayambhu, the self-created.

The second type of man sees God's handiwork and also accepts the hand behind it, but his acceptance is only mental. He is intimidated and frightened, so you will find him in temples and mosques, in churches and gurudwaras. He goes there because he is frightened, having suffered the lashes of the whip of life. Out of fear he comes to pray, to beg protection and to seek solace in wealth, position, name. He has come to beg. Fear is always a beggar, always asking for something or other. He has an inkling of the hand behind creation and a slight feeling for the presence of God, but only because of his fear. He is totally oblivious to God's munificence, or else he would not beg.

The third type is what Nanak talks about, the devotee. He sees His handiwork all around; he also sees His bounty and His grace in everything. To see His grace is subtle, like seeing the shadow of the whip. The devotee can see at every moment that He showers us with His gifts. What is left to be desired? You can only thank Him, therefore the devotee goes to the temple in thanksgiving, not as a supplicant. He has nothing to ask for.

Were God to appear before him and say, "Ask whatever you wish," he will instead reply, "You have given everything. It is already more than enough, more than I deserve. To ask for anything would imply a complaint that You haven't given enough, but I have been filled to the brim. What more is there when you have been given life?

But you attach no value to life. It is said that a great miser's life was coming to an end. As is usually the case his whole life had been spent gathering wealth which he was hoping to enjoy someday in the future. When death knocked at his door he was frightened that all his endeavors had been in vain. In working untiringly to gather enough wealth he had postponed living.

He told death, "I shall give you ten million rupees; give me just twenty-four hours, because I have not yet enjoyed life."

Death replied, "There can be no bargaining."

The man persisted, "I would give fifty million, a hundred million, just for one day." Ultimately he offered all his wealth for twenty-four hours more.

A whole lifetime lost amassing this fortune, and now he was begging to give it away for just one day more. He had never breathed freely; he had never sat beside the flowers; he had never seen the sun rising at the break of day, nor had he ever talked with the twinkling stars. He had never lain on the green grass and seen the clouds pass by nor heard the birds sing. He had had no time to see life as it passed by. All along he had deferred that moment. "Now I shall work, later I shall enjoy."

That moment never came.

Death said to him, "This is no transaction. Your time is up. Get ready to leave."

The man said, "Give me a few moments. I ask not for myself but for those who come after. Let them know how I toiled all these years and let life pass me by in the hope of enjoying it someday. Let me tell them that day never came." He wanted this inscription put on his grave.

All graves bear this inscription. If you have the eyes, go and read them. And the same will be inscribed on your grave too, if you do not sit up and take notice. If only you could see - you would find that what life has given you is limitless and beyond comparison.

How do you value life? For a moment more of life you are willing to give up everything, but during the years you have lived you were not at all thankful to God. If you were dying of thirst in a desert, you would be ready to part with all you possess just for a mouthful of water, but have you ever looked with gratitude at the rivers that flow, the clouds that bring rain? If the sun were to become cold we would die this very moment, yet did you ever get up in the morning and thank the sun?

Actually man follows a strange logic: what is near him he cannot see, what is not there at all he sees. When a tooth falls out, the tongue goes time and again to the empty space in your mouth.

When the tooth was there the tongue never once stopped in that spot. Now no matter how much you try to stop your tongue, it keeps exploring the empty place.

Man's mind always searches out empty places. He is blind towards all the filled places, but has eyes for all that is empty. Have you ever taken account of all you possess? Unless you do, you will never become aware of God's gifts; they are infinite.

God's bounty is infinite but try to be aware of what He has given you. All around His grace pours.

Just as each handiwork bears His signature, so behind each handiwork His grace lies hidden. All existence blooms only for you, all existence is His gift - to you. When a person becomes capable of seeing this, a new kind of devotion is born.

There is the atheist, stiff with pride; there is the believer, trembling with fear. Both are irreligious.

The really religious person dances and sings in utter gratefulness; he is filled with ecstasy.

THERE IS NO END TO HIS WORKS AND HIS BOUNTY, AND ENDLESS WHAT HE SEES AND HEARS.

THERE IS NO KNOWING THE SECRETS OF HIS MIND; THERE IS NO BEGINNING OR END TO IT.

SO MANY STRUGGLE TO KNOW HIS DEPTH, BUT NONE HAS EVER ACHIEVED IT.

NO ONE HAS EVER KNOWN HIS LIMITS; THE FURTHER YOU LOOK, THE FURTHER BEYOND HE LIES.

THE LORD IS GREAT. HIS PLACE IS HIGH, AND HIGHER EVEN IS HIS NAME.

What does it mean for His name to be high? For travelers on the path, it is only through His name that we reach Him. His name is the bridge; if it got lost the bridge is gone. For us the path is more significant than the destination for the simple reason that the goal cannot be reached without the path.

Therefore, Nanak says, he who knows the name has found the key. The key is more important than the treasure-house. To look at, it is only a piece of iron; but this piece of iron will open the doors to infinite treasures.

His name, which Nanak refers to as Omkar, is the key. This key opens His gate. When this 'remembrance' begins to crystallize in you, you will also have cast the mould of this key inside.

The key is not such as can be given to you; you have to cast it yourself; you have to become the key. Gradually you will find yourself turning into a key through the resonance of Omkar. Then you yourself will open His gates.

Man can find himself either in the state of thoughts or in the state of no-thought. In the first state, storms of thoughts are raging inside you; the mental skies are filled with clouds of argument, debate and discussion. It is as if there is always a crowd gathered in your head, as in the marketplace; it is a schizophrenic state.

The other state is of no-thoughts; the bazaar has cleared, the shops have closed; the market is deserted, there is silence and stillness all around. All thoughts have gone. As long as you are united with the thoughts, you are one with the world; as soon as your mind is freed of all thoughts, in this no-mind state, you are one with God. No sooner are you empty than the door opens.

The key that takes you from thoughts to no-thought is called the name, the resonance of omkar. The first stage is the japa, the repetition of Omkar. Get up in the morning or in the stillness of the night, sit in your room and repeat Om, Om, Om as loudly and quickly as you can, so that it resonates all around you. The Omkar has a very lovely melody. It is not music created by man, it is the rhythmic melody that resounds in existence. As you progress, taking the name louder and louder, its impression will begin to form on you. This is the state of japa, repetition.

Then , slowly slowly, close your lips and begin sounding Om within, as you did without. This time the resonance will be only in the mind. This is the intervening state between japa and a-japa.

Let the resonance increase deeper and deeper within. You must repeat the Omkar as well as hear it; articulate the name and be aware and listen to it also. Gradually you must decrease articulation of the name and concentrate on the resonance within. Then a moment comes when you will stop pronouncing the japa but the resonance continues. Then you only listen. This is the a-japa-jap, the unrepeated repetition.

When the resonance arises on its own, the Omkar has manifested. This is the sound of the stream of life that flows within you. The day you are capable of hearing it, you will discover you can hear it all day long. It is already there so you don't have to bring it about. You merely close your eyes and you will hear.

When anxiety, tension, restlessness or anger take hold of you, just shut your eyes for a moment and hear the resonance within. A moment's touch of Omkar and anger flees. A slight contact with the music within, a faint remembrance of the name, and the mind that made you so restless is no more.

Light a torch in a dark house; at the appearance of light darkness flees. Thus, a slight spark of Omkar and all darkness fades.

So it is that Nanak lays so much stress on Omkar - Ek Omkar satnam. All of his practice aims at attaining the resonance of the authentic Omkar. He refers to it as sabad, the word, or nam, the name.

THE LORD IS GREAT. HIS PLACE IS HIGH, AND HIGHER EVEN IS HIS NAME.

NANAK SAYS: ONE ONLY KNOWS HIS GREATNESS WHEN RAISED TO HIS HEIGHTS, BY FALLING UNDER THE GLANCE OF HIS ALL-COMPASSIONATE GRACE.

Nanak is saying: Greater than You is Your name. You are endless. For us the name is our only clue, through the name alone are we joined to You. Whether You are or You are not, we do not know.

It is the name alone that brings tidings of You. Through the power of the name shall we be drawn gradually towards You. When the resonance sounds by itself you are drawn towards God.

Scientists speak of the force of gravitation. We remain on the ground because of gravitation. If the earth were to lose this power of gravitation we would be flung up into the skies.

Simone Weil, a leading thinker in our century, has written a book called Grace and Gravitation. She says, "Just as we cannot see the force of gravitation that pulls us to the earth, there is another force at work, which is called grace."

Only yesterday it appeared in the newspapers that scientists are worried because the force of gravitation is becoming less. Though it has decreased only minimally, if this continues the earth will disintegrate, because it is gravitation alone that holds things together. It is this invisible magnetic force of the earth that keeps the trees rooted in the soil, allows man to walk and birds to fly.

Simone Weil has asserted that the force of grace also exists, and it too is invisible. She is talking precisely about that which Nanak calls His gift - that is, His compassion or His grace. As gravitation binds us downwards to the earth, grace pulls us upwards - to Him. As the resonance of Omkar intensifies inside you, the pull of gravitation diminishes, and the pull of grace increases proportionately. Then a moment comes when you become absolutely weightless. Yogis often experience this.

Some people intensely practicing meditation here have experienced this sudden feeling of weightlessness. No one can perceive this phenomenon from the outside. If the meditator were to open his eyes, he would find himself seated on the ground just as before; but as soon as he closes his eyes and feels the resonance inside, he experiences a sense of weightlessness. The physical body remains on the ground but the inner body separates from the earth and rises. If you continue in meditation one day you experience two bodies, not one; the body that has risen can see the body sitting on the ground, a thin thread of light connecting them.

Therefore remember, if someone practicing Omkar is deeply lost in meditation, do not shake him or bring him back too suddenly. This can be dangerous, and cause an imbalance between his physical and subtle bodies, which can be irreparable because the balance is very delicate.

In a deep stage of meditation a person steps out of his body, then comes back. When you become perfectly fluent with this art of stepping in and out of your body, you will know how to enter into and emerge from God. Then you see no difference between the material world and God Himself.

You stay in your body but your remembrance becomes uninterrupted; the thread of your thoughts is connected with Him.

THE LORD IS GREAT. HIS PLACE IS HIGH.

AND HIGHER EVEN IS HIS NAME.

NANAK SAYS: ONE ONLY KNOWS HIS GREATNESS WHEN RAISED TO HIS HEIGHTS, BY FALLING UNDER THE GLANCE OF HIS ALL-COMPASSIONATE GRACE.

It is rather intricate and complicated. There are only two systems of sadhana - of spiritual practice.

The basis of one system is resolve, and that of the other is surrender. Both lead to the same goal but they are diametrically the opposite of each other.

The methods of Mahavir and Patanjali and Gorakh are based on resolve, on effort. All life-energy is devoted to the effort. When there is absolutely no energy remaining outside that effort, when you have given yourself up to it wholly, that very day the event will occur; when you have left nothing for yourself, your resolve will be complete and perfect.

Nanak, Meera and Chaitanya have followed the second path, the way of surrender. It is entirely different; the seeker believes that nothing happens through one's own effort - only through His grace do we achieve. Now this does not mean you make no effort, but don't put too much faith in your prowess. Try you must, but remember that the outcome will happen only through His grace.

This is very, very important. If you rely only on your own labors, you will strengthen your ego.

Therefore it is easy for a yogi to be proud, because he begins to believe that things are happening because of him.

Once this ego develops it is very difficult to be rid of it. It is easier to be rid of the arrogance of wealth, it is not difficult to renounce the pride of position, but it is very difficult to be rid of the ego of one's own endeavors. There is every possibility of the seeker feeling that whatever is happening is because of him; the I becomes primary and God secondary. Because of this danger, Mahavir, Patanjali, Gorakh and others who follow this path lay great stress on the annihilation of the ego.

Make the effort, put your all into it, but renounce your ego is what they stress so emphatically. If the ego functions along with the effort, it will get stronger and stronger. Then you feel in whatever you do, I am doing it: I have done japa, I have done penance, I have attained occult powers. And if this arrogance is not eradicated in good time, you will have opened many doors but not the last. All your efforts will have been in vain.

Therefore, Nanak says: Try with all your might, but remember, His grace alone can bring about the happening. With this precaution, the risk in the method of resolve is removed. But there is a different risk in the path of surrender, which arises at the very beginning.

The danger is in feeling that there is no need to do anything. If the happening occurs only through His grace, what can we do? It becomes an excuse for not doing anything. So you remain involved in all the useless daily activities of life. You may assume it is not yet His will that you should set out on this path - and so you wait. Meanwhile you indulge in all that is most contemptible in life; you wander in the maze of the material world. Thus the danger in the path of surrender lies at the very onset - you might become lost in laziness and inertia.

So try you must in the fullest measure, while remembering that the fruit of the endeavor is attained only through His grace. Therefore Nanak repeats over and over: His grace showers only on those within the gaze of His compassionate vision. On whom does this compassion descend but those who prepare themselves for it through their efforts?

Understand that in everyday life the meaning of a compassionate look is quite different. Does He too show partiality? Is He kind to His own but lets the rest be? Does He select a few to shower with His grace while He leaves others to suffer? We cannot associate God with such injustices. Things would become meaningless if a sinner might receive His grace while a saint is deprived of it. There would be no sense in doing anything.

No, this is not the meaning of the compassionate look. It is not that He chooses someone that suits His whim or fancy, or that He favors those who flatter and sing His praises. His grace showers on all, but there are some who have turned their pots upside down, so that they never get filled. If your pot is upright, it is bound to be filled. And don't imagine that your upright pot caused the grace to shower! Grace showers all the time.

Nanak says the filling takes place by His compassion, but some effort you have to make - by placing your vessel in the proper position to receive. And you will have to see that there are no cracks or holes in it, that it is not lying upside down or slanting so that the grace cannot reach the mouth of your vessel and enter it.

His grace pours on everyone incessantly. It is you who are not standing upright to receive it or in your twisting and turning, it slides off you.

There is an apparent contradiction: if you are deprived of grace you have only yourself to blame, but if you attain grace it is only because of Him. You attain through Him, lose through your own self.

When following the path of surrender it is imperative to remember that if I am losing, it is I who am wrong; if I am gaining, it is entirely by His grace. This way the ego cannot be fattened, because there is no space within for it to expand - or even to exist. He who has no ego finds that God is within him.

HIS COMPASSION IS BEYOND ALL DESCRIPTION.

THE LORD'S GIFTS ARE SO GREAT HE EXPECTS NOTHING IN RETURN.

Understand the meaning of dana, charity. You too give in charity, but behind your gift hides some desire. If you give two paise to a beggar you do so with the hope of a return in heaven - if not in heaven, at least your neighbors or your friends should be watching so that you rise in their esteem, or gain some respect from them.

There was a blind, deaf man who attended church regularly although he couldn't see what was going on, much less hear the hymns or sermons. What motivation could he have had but to show how deeply religious he was?

Now you may have eyes, but your reason for coming is just the same; you have ears, but your reason is no different. Going to the temple or church or gurudwara has become a social obligation, a duty to be performed. And when you give a single paise you expect a return. You know nothing of charity, everything is a business deal.

This is the difference between a charity and business. When you expect a return it involves bargaining, it is a business. Then it turns out you have never given in charity, you have only invested for future gains. And those who exploit you know very well that you are striking a bargain, so they explain to you: "Give one paise here, you will get a million there." Whatever you offer will be returned a millionfold, that is the promise. Every exploiter knows for certain that you are a businessman, a trader - that you cannot truly give as charity.

Will you ever donate to a temple when it is proclaimed that you will get nothing in return? It will be difficult to find a donor for such a temple; it will never last, nor even get constructed.

When you think of God's charity, do not think in terms of your charity. He does not give the way you do. Nanak says He gives but expects nothing in return. And what do you have that you can give Him? His charity is pure, unconditional.

What have we given in return for all that we have received? You were given life and in this life you found love; you had faint glimpses of well-being and health, of beauty and of truth, and what have you done in return? It is astonishing that we never think of repaying Him.

Once aware of all that you have received, you would dance in celebration forever, singing His praises not out of fear but out of gratitude. All that was given you was too much, and without any motive. We neither know the way nor have the ability to repay. We can repay the debt owed to our parents, but never can we repay God for all that He has given us, for His gift is unconditional.

HIS COMPASSION IS BEYOND ALL DESCRIPTION.

THE LORD'S GIFTS ARE SO GREAT HE EXPECTS NOTHING IN RETURN.

HOWEVER GREAT A HERO OR WARRIOR, MAN KEEPS ON BEGGING.

Not only beggars, even our warriors beg. There is not much difference between a beggar and a king, only a matter of degree. Remember, when your neediness ends you begin to see and experience His gifts. The smoke of your demands prevents you from seeing what you have already received.

The need to beg hides the gratitude. The day your demands drop, the false form of prayer drops and the correct form of prayer takes shape.

IT IS DIFfiCULT TO CONCEIVE THE COUNTLESS NUMBERS WHO GO ON ASKING.

THEY INDULGE THEMSELVES IN DESIRES AND DISSIPATE THEIR LIVES.

Nanak has made the important observation that your demands are so blind and thoughtless that if you attain them you destroy yourself. Your asking is for the wrong things. Nanak is right; observe your life carefully and you will see that all the ills you suffer are the result of your own desires.

If you wish to rise in status, it entails anxiety and sleepless nights and restless days. In the West they say that if you do not get a heart attack by the time you are forty you are not a successful man; if you do not have a stomach ulcer you are a poor man. These are the signs of success and prosperity.

After all, what does a successful man gain by desiring more success? Whatever a man wishes for, he attains something or other. It may be early, it may be late, but you will find that your desires are fulfilled. Therefore be very careful in what you ask for, so that you won't regret it later. first you waste time in asking, then in repenting and regretting.

Analyze your own life carefully and you will find that you alone have got yourself in the state you are in. You got enmeshed in your desires. You wanted riches, you got it; but along with it came all the worries and anxieties, because they are very much a part of wealth. With wealth comes a constriction of the soul; with wealth comes a thousand kinds of illness; with wealth come pride and arrogance. They are all very much a part of wealth and cannot be separated from it. Then you repent.

THEY INDULGE THEMSELVES IN DESIRES AND DISSIPATE THEIR LIVES.

AND OTHERS RECEIVE, YET DENY IT.

Some are destroying themselves through their desiring. Others receive and yet deny. They offer no gratitude.

Every morning at prayer time Mulla Nasruddin would call out loudly to God: "Remember one thing, I need a hundred rupees, not a paise less. Whenever you feel like giving, remember ninety-nine will not do."

Mulla's neighbor used to hear him every day. He decided to play a joke on Mulla. He filled a bag with ninety-nine rupees and dropped it from the roof into the room where Mulla was praying aloud as usual. He was sure Mulla would not accept the gift for one rupee was missing. As soon as Mulla saw the bag he forgot his prayers and began to count the coins. When he found there were ninety-nine he said, "Well done, Lord. You are a businessman all right: you deducted one rupee for the bag."

Man is not prepared even to acknowledge and offer thanks. He still finds room for complaint - one rupee deducted for the bag!

A wealthy man was returning home after a long sea voyage. A heavy storm overtook them and the ship was in danger of overturning at any moment. Everyone began to pray, including the rich man.

At first his prayers were very vague, but when it became a question of life and death he called aloud to God and said, "If you save us today Lord, I shall sell my castle and distribute the proceeds to the poor." As it happened the storm abated and the ship reached shore safely. Then the rich man was filled with remorse. He thought the storm would have abated anyhow, and he had unnecessarily opened his loud mouth. Now that everyone had heard him, he would have to make good his pledge.

This is why people pray silently, so that no one knows what bargains they strike with God.

Everyone on the boat had heard the rich man's prayer, and as soon as the ship landed the news spread like wildfire. He thought and thought, until finally he announced his decision to sell the castle.

Many buyers came, because it was the largest in the area. Although it was valued at a million rupees, the owner had imposed a strange condition. He tied a cat before the house and said he would sell the cat for a million and the house for one rupee. Whoever buys must take both offers together.

At first people were surprised at such madness. Had anyone ever heard such a fantastic price for one cat - a million rupees? But buyers came all the same. What difference did it make to them about the price of the cat if they would be getting the property? So the deal was struck. The rich man pocketed his million rupees and distributed one rupee among the poor - that being the price of the house.

People establish a business or legal relationship even with God. Even there they are still trying to get off as cheaply as possible. So as Nanak says, there are many who have their wishes fulfilled, yet deny it outright. They say it was a coincidence, that it was about to happen anyhow. Many others don't even say that much; they coolly forget that they had asked for what was given, let alone are grateful.

There are many who keep asking and who keep receiving, who never rise above this tendency of asking and receiving. They keep enjoying, but it never leads anywhere; they only waste their time.

Eat whatever you may, what will you get out of it? Wear whatever you want, what is the gain?

Decorate yourself with gold and precious stones, how will that profit you? While you are doing this the priceless moments of life are slipping by, moments when you should have prayed and attained the wealth of meditation. Life is just passing you by, wasted in the gathering of pebbles and stones.

Nanak says there are many who are suffering from their hunger, yet do not take to remembrance.

We suffer in desiring yet we do not awaken to the fact that we suffer because of our desires. Our woes are the fruits of desires and our hells arise from our longings, but we never connect the two.

Always pleading for happiness, can't we see that the longing itself leads to suffering?

It is just as if a man were to walk with his back to the sun then wonder why he cannot see the sun.

You could see the sun here and now, but your desire-ridden mind goes towards suffering. Then you color your prayers with the hues of those desires. In his prayers, the devotee offers up all his desires as a libation to be burned; whereas you dedicate your prayers to the service of your desires.

Nanak reminds us that many suffer and go on suffering and yet do not awaken. For how many births have you been bearing the weight of misfortune? Buddha said there are three types of horse. This is not correct. I say there are four. The fourth type do not stir an inch no matter how hard and how long you beat them; they are really obstinate creatures. The more you hit them the more stubborn they become.

In spite of your misfortunes you are oblivious to your sufferings. You have become used to them, so much so that you feel that is what life is. You have forgotten - no, you are unconscious of - the fact that life is supreme bliss, one long celebration; and if you are unhappy it is because of some error of your own.

O LORD, THESE TOO ARE YOUR GIFTS.

People keep asking, and the Lord keeps giving. Remember, you will get whatever you ask for.

Existence does not discriminate or judge. Ask for the right things and you will get them; ask for the wrong things and you will get them. Existence gives unconditionally. God puts no obstacles to your freedom, He lets you choose whatever you like. You may wander in the maze of samsara, or you may set out to attain Him. He leaves you free to make your own choice.

This brings up a question: since God knows everything, what is right and what is wrong, why does He comply with our wishes that are wrong? If He were not to fulfill your desires you would lose your freedom. You would be no more than a puppet on strings. Then He would give you whatever He chooses and your wish would no longer matter. Then the whole dignity of man is lost; it lies in the fact of his freedom - freedom even to go wrong. There is the possibility of freedom, you are not entirely tied to chains. You have the opportunity to make a conscious choice. You can go whichever way you please. He does not oppose you or stand in your way; He leaves all paths open to you.

If you choose, you can fall into the deepest hell and He will not stop you. You can rise to the highest heaven, He will not obstruct you. You get His power under all conditions; His grace is unconditional.

His gift does not make you dependent in any way. He gives - you may use His gift as you please.

He does not question.

O LORD, THESE TOO ARE YOUR GIFTS.

YOUR ORDER ALONE GIVES FREEDOM OR BONDAGE.

But it is we who ask to be enslaved, and slavery results. The order is His, the command is His, the law is His, so also the rule.

For instance, if you jump from a high tree you are bound to break your bones. The same gravitational force that holds you to the earth becomes the cause of your fractured bones. If you walk straight this force helps you to walk, but if you sway and stagger you are bound to fall and hurt yourself. The force at work in both cases is the same.

Energy is neutral, impartial; God is absolutely impartial, unbiased. If you use the energy well you can attain the highest experience; use it ill and you can fall into life's deepest abyss. Says Nanak:

"All comes through You - heaven as well as hell." But our desire is behind these. It is Your law that works, but it is we who ask and ask and exhaust ourselves.

A great politician died. When he reached the door of heaven he announced that he would first inspect both heaven and hell before deciding where he would stay. He was taken around heaven and found it too quiet and insipid for his liking. A politician used to living in Delhi with all its excitement is bound to find heaven rather dull. People are relaxed and peaceful; there is no noise, no tumult, no chaos; there is no fighting, no processions, no blockades; in fact, nothing is happening there.

He asked for a newspaper and was told there was none. A newspaper can only be printed when there is news. News requires disturbance and trouble. If you want to be in the news you have to cause some kind of commotion. If you sit under a tree like Buddha, no reporter will come your way.

He said he didn't enjoy such a dull atmosphere and he would like to pay a visit to hell. He reached hell and was immediately impressed. It was more lively and gay even than Delhi; there were lots of newspapers, lots of processions - everywhere there was noise and movement. There was gaiety and mirth all around, with hotels and bars and cinemas. He was very pleased and wondered why people on earth had the opposite impression of heaven and hell.

He asked Satan, who stood at the gate to welcome him, "Why is such a wrong account of hell given on earth? Had I accepted it without looking for myself I would have suffered in heaven. On earth when a person dies it is good manners to say he has left for his heavenly abode. Actually, this is the place to come. There is so much more life here."

Satan answered, "There is a reason for all this false propaganda. The opposition party has campaigned against me. They are always publicizing heaven and who listens to me? Whenever I try to tell someone the actual facts, they warn him, 'Beware of Satan!' See for yourself how unjust this is."

The politician went back to the gate to tell the escort from heaven to leave because he had made his decision to stay in hell. No sooner did he say this than the doors of hell closed suddenly and the conditions inside changed drastically - just like in the films. He found a crowd of people attacking and manhandling him. When he shouted in protest and demanded to know what was going on, Satan answered, "Before you were on a tourist visa. Now you are an immigrant. What you saw was meant for visitors only. Now you will get the real taste of hell."

People choose hell all the time, because the initial stage of every desire is 'for visitors only'. Every desire seduces in the beginning. It is the display window, not the real thing - only an advertisement.

Once you choose a particular desire the real hell starts. You alone select your particular path to hell.

Heaven is dull at first glance. Bliss is bound to appear uninteresting, because it is the supreme peace. Suffering appears much more interesting and exciting in the beginning because it is provocative. And you choose excitement; you succumb to its provocation, and then suffer. Once you choose tranquillity you will attain bliss. Everything happens by His order, by His rule; but His order shapes to your desire. He is neutral. He does not impose His will on you. Even were He to do so, you would not be ready to accept His will.

If heaven were given to you by force, it would seem worse than hell; and if hell is chosen by your free will, it seems like heaven, because your independence is whole and challenged.

A subtle philosophical question is involved: how can man's freedom and God's independence exist together? On this basis Mahavir denied the existence of God, because if the will of God is supreme man cannot be independent. And if there is no independence, what value has the soul? Therefore Mahavir insists: There is no God, there is freedom! Others have disagreed: There is no freedom!

Only destiny is, God is.

Nanak's concept is between these two. He says man is free and God also exists. Man has the freedom of choice; he can ask for whatever he desires. He can work towards attaining his desires, but he succeeds only through His compassion. Ask for joy or ask for sorrow - you will get it.

Now this is interesting. Why do you go on asking for suffering? The fact remains that if you do not ask for happiness, try as He may, God cannot give it to you.

Junaid, the fakir, used to say that you cannot give happiness by force, you cannot force tranquillity.

He would say, "I am eager to give joy and peace to others, I have tried many times, but it is impossible. The more you urge upon a person, the more you startle him and he becomes suspicious.

You cannot give bliss to anyone, because no one is ready to take it."

One of his devotees said he could not believe this and he would like to try an experiment. He chose a pauper as the subject, and told Junaid: "The king is your devotee. Ask the King to give him ten million asharfis, then let's see if he still remains a pauper." Junaid agreed. On the day fixed for the experiment the asharfis were placed in a pot which was placed in the middle of the bridge that the pauper crossed every afternoon. All traffic on the bridge was closed for that day. Junaid and his followers and the king stood on the other side and watched from their hiding place.

Now the man came along. The bridge was empty. There was not a soul to be seen and there was the open pot with the golden coins shimmering in the sun. But wonder of wonders, the man passed the vessel without so much as looking at it and crossed the bridge. Junaid and his followers ran up to him and asked, "Couldn't you see the pot filled with coins?"

"Which pot?" he asked. "For such a long time I wanted to cross the bridge with my eyes closed, but as there was always such heavy traffic I couldn't do so. Today when I saw the bridge empty the thought came to me that I should take this opportunity to try my skill. I succeeded in crossing the bridge with closed eyes. I am sorry. I didn't see the pot you are speaking about."

Junaid told his disciples, "Do you see this? He who is going to miss will fail by some means. He will create a thought that will make him fail. He who is bent on missing the opportunity cannot be helped under any circumstances."

Even God cannot give you what you are not ready to take. If you are ready for suffering you get suffering, if you are ready for happiness you get happiness - you get only that for which you are prepared. And you receive it only through His grace, whereas you attain through your own effort.

His grace is forever showering on all but you are filled only when you are ready and eager to be filled.

O LORD, THESE TOO ARE YOUR GIFTS.

YOUR ORDER ALONE GIVES FREEDOM OR BONDAGE.

NOBODY CAN DEBATE THIS FACT.

HE WHO INDULGES IN USELESS BABBLE REALIZES HIS FOLLY WHEN STRUCK IN THE FACE.

HE ALONE CAN KNOW HIMSELF, AND ONLY THE RAREST CAN DESCRIBE HIM; HE BEQUEATHS THE QUALITY OF HIS STATE TO WHOMEVER HE CHOOSES.

NANAK SAYS, HE IS THE KING OF KINGS.

There are many who indulge in this prattle in the sphere of religion. In no other field is it so easy to say whatever you please, because the whole field of religion is mysterious and there are no proofs, therefore anything passes.

Thus there are three hundred different religions. Could there have been so many otherwise? And in these three hundred religions there are three thousand sects - both big and small. A lot of useless junk has been introduced in the name of religion. Besides, there is no way to judge what is true and what is untrue. And the one who sermonizes is usually so glib!

Mahavir used to speak of seven hells. There was an opponent of Mahavir by the name of Makkhali Gosal. When his disciples asked him whether he knew about the seven hells that Mahavir spoke of, he said, "Mahavir doesn't really know. There are really seven hundred hells."

What are we to do now? Is Makkhali Gosal stating the truth or Mahavir? Who is right? What is the truth?

In the life of Makkhali Gosal it happened exactly as Nanak would predict. Having made far-fetched statements his whole life, he repented at the time of death. As death approached he began to tremble with fear. He called his disciples together and said to them, "Whatever I have told you is a lie. Drag my body along the road when I am dead and tell people to spit on my face, because with this mouth I have uttered nothing but falsity."

This man Makkhali Gosal must have been a man of courage and honesty, or else he would have kept quiet a few moments more. Having spoken lies his whole life, he could have remained silent and died quietly. Then perhaps there would have been a sect or a religion following after him, because there were many who believed in him. He was one of the greatest opponents of Mahavir, though he started as Mahavir's disciple. As soon as he learned something he began to create his own new order, because he was clever and able and a good orator.

When Mahavir came to the village where Makkhali Gosal was staying he insisted on meeting him.

"He is my erstwhile disciple. I will ask him why he is indulging in this foolishness." When they met, Makkhali Gosal pretended he was seeing Mahavir for the first time. One can never trust a liar.

Mahavir said to him, "Have you forgotten completely the years when you were with me?"

Makkhali replied, "You are mistaken. The soul that stayed with you left long ago. Now the soul of a Teerthankara has entered this body. This body may have been with you - I have heard so - but I am not the same one who was with you. He who was your disciple is long dead. Now don't ever say that Makkhali Gosal was your disciple."

Mahavir must have remained silent. What could be said to such a man? And he had a large following and was very influential. However, he must also have been a good man, because at the time of his death he owned up to his hypocrisy.

Nanak has spoken of just such examples. He who preaches false sermons will realize his foolishness when fate slaps him in the face, when death confronts him and life ebbs away. Then he realizes the utterly useless nonsense he spoke about heaven and hell, when in fact he knew nothing. Now life has passed out of his hands and he had laid no firm foundation. All life long he floated paper boats, now when the time has come to sink, alas, it is too late!

Beware! When it comes to religion, speak only if you know, or else hold your peace! For the mind endlessly investigates and makes discoveries; it is a skilled explorer. Once the mind begins to search and debate, a discussion begins and a web of thoughts and words is woven that expands on its own. Then you have nothing to do. Automatically one word gives rise to another, one theory expounded leads to another, and then another....

It once happened: A well-known priest came to a rest home. He tied his horse under a tree and went in to rest. Mulla Nasruddin happened to be looking on. The priest was known to be attached to his horse, which was a fine animal and very valuable. Everywhere he went to preach, he would go on his favorite horse.

The Mulla went up to the horse and began to rub its neck gently. At that moment a man came along and asked, "Is that your horse?"

Now such a fine animal - it was a shame to admit it did not belong to him. So the Mulla said, "Yes, it is mine."

Do you want to sell him?" the man asked.

Things were now becoming complicated. "Have you the courage to buy him?" the Mulla asked. The horse was worth a thousand rupees, but Nasruddin was looking for a way out so he asked for two thousand, thinking it was too stiff a price and the man wouldn't pay. But the man agreed. Now the Mulla was in a fix. He could not go back on his word. Then he thought, "What is the harm? I'm making two thousand rupees, and besides, the priest is sleeping."

Just as he pocketed the money and the buyer had left with the horse, the priest came out. The Mulla thought fast. There was no time to run. He quickly tied the rope around his neck and shoved a bit of straw in his mouth.

The priest was frightened. He began to tremble. But he put up a brave front and asked the Mulla, "Where is my horse? And what are you doing here?"

"Your horse and myself are not two," replied the Mulla. "I am your horse."

"What? Are you mad or are you drunk?" demanded the priest.

"Neither," replied the Mulla. "Please hear me out. Twenty years ago I committed adultery. God was angry and he turned me into a horse - your horse. Now it seems my sentence is over and I have become a man again. My name is Nasruddin."

The priest now was really frightened. Such divine wrath - a man turns into a horse! He went down on his knees and implored God to forgive him for all his sins. So many sins had he committed, he pleaded for His compassion.

Then he spoke to Nasruddin. "Brother, it is all right. What has happened has happened. I have to go ahead to the next village. You go home, and I will go to the market and buy a new horse."

He went to a horse-dealer, and there he saw his horse. He was beside himself with fear. He went up to the horse and whispered in his ear, "Nasruddin, how come?... And so soon?"

Once the mind starts a lie, they sprout like leaves on a tree. One lie gives rise to four others, and these in turn produce more lies. To save one lie we have to tell a thousand more. Then the number of lies becomes so astronomical that you even forget they are lies. Frequent repetitions gives them the garb of truth, and these very falsities then hypnotize you.

Thousands of such untruths prevail that have no bearing on truth. With religion this is very easy because there is no way to test, no institute where one can investigate, no criterion by which to judge. Religion lives on faith; no scientific research can help.

Therefore remember: do not ever utter an untruth, or else you will repent. The habit of lying is very deep-seated in the mind.

People come to me and say, "I have been doing Vipassana meditation for the past ten years." When I ask if something has happened I see from their expression that nothing has changed, but they say, "Yes, a lot has happened."

Then I talk of other things and ask again, "Tell the truth, have you experienced anything? If something had been happening there would have been no need to come to talk to me in the first place, so make up your mind and say nothing has happened so that I can take your case in hand."

Then they admit it, "Nothing has happened."

Now a few minutes before, this very man was claiming so much success. The mind refuses to admit that ten year's effort has yielded no result. The mind is very deceitful. Beware of it. The more you fall into its trap the more you will regret. Life will pass away and death will stand at your head; then you will repent and wonder why you wasted yourself in all these lies.

God alone knows Himself. God alone gives. Knowing is His; giving is His. For us it is enough to be the recipient. Knowledge is His. Existence is His. We shall receive both when we are open and eager to receive them, when we have our gaze turned toward Him.

There is no need to fall into the mind's trap. The mind can give neither knowledge nor existence; it can only give untruth. He who listens to the mind falls into falsity.

In an old story, the gods were once so pleased by a man's devotion that they gave him a magic conch shell that would fulfill any wish expressed to it. You say a palace and immediately a palace appears. You say a banquet fit for a king and there is a great feast laid out before you. The man was very happy as he began to enjoy all the good things in life.

One day a priest who was passing through the town halted at this man's palace for a night's rest. He had heard about the magic shell and wanted to possess it. He too had a conch shell which he called Maha-shankha, great conch shell. He said to his host, "Your shell is nothing compared to mine. I too practiced many austerities and the gods favored me with this Maha-shankha. You ask one thing of it, it gives two."

Now as is human nature, the man's greed was awakened. He said, "Show me the magic of your conch shell."

The priest took out the Maha-shankha and placing it before him said, "Brother, make a palace."

The conch said, "Why one? Why not two?"

The host was impressed. He gave his conch to the priest and took his Maha-shankha in return. The priest then soon left. Almost immediately the man tried frantically to find him again, because the conch only spoke but did not perform. You say two and it will say,"Why not four?" You say four, it will say "Why not eight?" This was all it could do.

The mind is a Maha-shankha. Whatever God gives it says, "Why only this much, why not more?"

The mind is only a babble of words. It is all lies. It can produce nothing. But we are such that we have let go of God and cling to the mind. For the mind talks in a duplicity that sets fire to our greed. Just think, has the mind ever given you anything? Have you ever attained anything through the mind?

HE ALONE CAN KNOW HIMSELF, AND ONLY THE RAREST CAN DESCRIBE HIM; HE BEQUEATHS THE QUALITY OF HIS STATE TO WHOMEVER HE CHOOSES.

NANAK SAYS, HE IS THE KING OF KINGS.

One last priceless thing in this sutra. Dhun-Nun was an Egyptian fakir. When he realized God he heard a voice in the skies which said, "Dhun Nun, before you set out in search of Me, I had already chosen you. Had I not, you would never have set out in search of Me."

Nanak says that He ordains the one He chooses with the quality to sing His praise. The fact is, you set out to seek Him only when He has knocked at your door. How can you set out on this tremendous quest all by yourself? How can you arrive at the idea of the quest, how can you acquire His remembrance, how can His praise be born within you, if He does not will it?

Then no matter how long it takes in the quest, the fact is that He has already chosen you. Your search has begun; He has already entered into your life. He has awakened the thirst within you and Nanak says: It is He alone who awakens the thirst for Him.

Nanak's method is: leave all to Him. Keep nothing in your hands because the arrogance of the ego can arise very subtly. You may begin to say, "I am a seeker, I am in quest of God." But Nanak, so that this I does not take root anywhere, says it is His grace that confers the quality to sing His praise.

We can only sing Your praise if You will us to do so. How can we sing Your praise without Your direction? We cannot even raise our eyes towards You unless You give support to our vision. Our feet can never walk along Your path unless You direct them. We cannot think of You, or dream of You, or ponder over You, unless You have already chosen us.

Nanak plucks out all roots of the ego. Where ego is not, there His doors open to us; where ego is not, the resonance of Omkar starts on its own. Only because of the tumult and noise of your ego, can you not hear the faint resonance within.