Accept Your Reality

MAN IS UNCONSCIOUS, ALTHOUGH HE BELIEVES HE IS CONSCIOUS. That very belief protects his unconsciousness. Man is ignorant, although he believes he knows. That very belief keeps the ignorance intact. Man is just the opposite of what he thinks he is. To understand this is the beginning of a great revolution.

To see where you are, what you are in actuality, needs courage. It is nice to believe in beautiful ideals. All ideals function only for one thing: they hide your reality; that's why we go on creating beautiful ideals. Not that we are really interested in those great ideals; our real interest is how to hide the ugly facts.

People go on talking about non-violence, and all that they do in their lives is violence, sheer violence and nothing else. The more violent they are, the more they talk about non-violence. The talk about non-violence becomes a camouflage.

This country has talked about non-violence for centuries, and it has not happened; and it is not going to happen because the very talk creates an illusion. And slowly slowly, you are not only capable of deceiving others, you start deceiving yourself. When you have talked for centuries about non-violence you start thinking that you have become non-violent. That is really the purpose of talking about non-violence.

Just a few days ago the president of India stayed in a circuit house in Madras, and because he could not get non-vegetarian food there - meat, eggs, et cetera - he was very annoyed. If he had not been annoyed, the country may not have come to know that he is a meat-eater; a Gandhian and a meat-eater. And these are the people who go on talking about non-violence.

They go to the samadhi of Mahatma Gandhi every year, ceremoniously, ritualistically. These are the people who have taken vows on the samadhi of Mahatma Gandhi, and they continue to eat meat, they continue to kill animals. What kind of non-violence is this?

But this is how man is: very deceptive, very cunning.

Those who are moving on the path have to be aware of this stupid ideological camouflage. It is very easy to have beautiful ideals. And you will be surprised if you watch people: if you know their ideals you can be certain that they will be just the opposite of their ideals. Knowing their ideals, you can deduce logically that their life must be the very opposite of it. The ideal only proves that there is something that they are hiding behind it.

A conscious person has no ideals at all. A conscious person lives through his consciousness. He is one; his inner and outer are not divided.

But all kinds of idealism divide the outer and the inner. It does not allow you to be natural, spontaneous; it forces you to be something other than you are. It gives you shoulds - you should do this, you should do that. Because of those shoulds you start believing that you are aspiring very high, that you are soaring very high: "Look what beautiful ideals I have got"and behind that empty talk your reality is just the opposite. The greedy person wants to become non-greedy. The angry person wants to become compassionate. The unloving person has the ideal of love. All the religions talk about love, and all that they do on the earth is create hate. All the nations of the world talk about peace, and all that they do is prepare for war.

See it. This is what we have become: pseudo, hypocrites.

No nation prepares for peace - not even India, which is a non-violent country, the great religious country. All nations talk about peace and prepare for war. War remains the reality and peace remains just smoke around it, to hide it.

Unless we see it through and through there is no way to get out of it. Whenever you want some ideal to be fulfilled in your life, watch why. How can an angry person practise compassion? How? It is impossible. If the angry person practises compassion he will be, at the most, repressing his anger, that's all. What else can he do? He has been angry with others, now he will be angry with his own anger, that's all. The anger has taken a new form, a new shape.

The violent person wants to become non-violent: what is he going to do? He has been violent with others, now he will become violent with himself. That's what you call asceticism? Asceticism is basically masochism: it is a joy in torturing yourself. And these people become great mahatmas, they are worshiped, but all that has happened is that their violence has turned inwards. You torture others, they torture themselves; but the torture continues, and the pleasure in torturing continues.

The man who lies on the bed of thorns - do you think he is religious? What is religious in it? He is simply torturing his body, but you will find people worshiping him. He is neurotic, but he will be thought of as a mahatma.

If it is cold and snow is falling and somebody is standing naked under the skies, what is he doing?

He is simply torturing the body, but people will think, "What a great soul." He simply needs a few electric shocks; he is psychiatrically ill, he is mad, he is suicidal.

It is very easy to catch hold of the murderer, it is very difficult to catch hold of the person who is suicidal, but both are murderers. They both enjoy violence.

That's why Mahatma Gandhi's violence is not visible. He is as violent as Adolf Hitler; the only difference is of direction. Mahatma Gandhi's violence is very invisible: he tortures himself. If you keep somebody else hungry for many days, that will be violence, but if you keep yourself hungry and call it upavas, fasting, then this is something religious. It is not. It is the same game, and more dangerous, because when you keep somebody else in a state of torture he at least can defend, but when you start torturing your own innocent body, the body cannot defend. There is no defence possible, your own body is utterly helpless.

If you are violent with others the law can defend, the police can defend, but if you are violent with yourself there is no law against it. In fact even the magistrate and the lawyer and the policeman will come and worship you: you are doing something beautiful. Man has remained in darkness because of such stupid ideas.

The first thing to be remembered is: the violent man cannot become non-violent by any effort. Then is there no possibility? Yes, there is a possibility, but it is not through effort, not through will, not through practising being other than you are. The possibility is by becoming aware.

Rather than trying to be non-violent, become aware of your violence, of how your violence functions.

See the roots of it. Go deep into it, into how it arises, into how it permeates your being and your activities. Watch violence, and in the very watching, becoming aware of it, you will be surprised: it starts disappearing.

Nobody can be consciously violent: this is a fundamental law, the secret. Nobody can be consciously violent; so all that is needed is to bring consciousness, to become more conscious, to become more meditative. Nobody can be meditatively angry; that is not possible. At the most, yoU can act.

That's what Jesus did when he took a whip and went into the temple and threw out the money- changers, started beating those money-changers, turned their tables. That's what he was doing - acting. It was just an act, a put-upon act. A meditative person cannot be angry; that is impossible.

Meditation means you are so conscious of whatsoever you are doing; in that very consciousness the quality of doing changes. You need not have ideals. Ideals are simply postponing the revolution, the mutation.

Just a few days before somebody was asking me, "I feel I am stupid. What can I do to become intelligent?" Now, I had to tell him that if a stupid person tries to become intelligent, he will remain stupid. At the most he will become an intellectual, but never intelligent.

That's how intellectual people are: hiding their stupidity behind words, knowledge, information. If a stupid person tries to be intelligent, how can he become intelligent? In the first place, he will be doing everything oUt of his stupidity; and when you do something out of your stupidity your stupidity is going to be strengthened. But he can do one thing: he can gather information, he can gather knowledge, he can start having an illusion of knowing through knowledge. That's how people become pundits, scholars, learned professors; that's how it happens, but the stupidity remains there.

In their very foundation, the stupidity goes on remaining as an undercurrent. They just have a good show on the outside; deep down they are still stupid.

Then what to do? How to get out of stupidity? The only way is, watch your stupidity. Go into its working, its mechanism. Go into how yoU act, go watchfully into it. See it, how it is there, how it affects your behavior. Watch it in its multidimensional reality, and in that very watching you are becoming intelligent - because watching is intelligence.

And if you become really alert about your stupidity, the one who has become alert is no longer stupid. Stupidity is left out. You have become awareness, you have become a witness; and out of this witnessing another kind of life arises which has beauty, which has benediction, which has a grace of its own. But it is arduous to be watchful; it is easier to have ideals.

Drop all ideals. Don't try to become somebody that you are not. On the contrary, just watch whatsoever you are. Watch the fact, don't create a fiction against it; otherwise you will always be divided. You will remain the fact and you will start believing in the fiction - that's the meaning of hypocrisy. Your reality goes on persisting in the same way, and just on the surface you have a painted mask. That is not going to help; that has not helped humanity up to now.

The new man is possible only if we drop all kinds of idealisms. Hindu, Christian, Mohammedan, Communist, Gandhian - all kinds of idealisms have to be dropped. The moment you drop all kinds of idealism, suddenly you have dropped your schizophrenia; you are not two, you are one. You are simply whatsoever you are. Then you have the innocence of a tree, the innocence of an animal, the innocence of a bird, and something more: the consciousness of a human being. And the meeting of the innocence of a bird and the consciousness of a human being creates the Buddha. Buddhahood is nothing but innocence plus consciousness.

But the man who carries great ideals can never be simple and innocent; it is impossible. He is always cunning, trying to be somebody, trying to reach somewhere. All that he can do is pretend.

And when I am saying this, I am saying it to you: my sannyasins have to drop all kinds of idealisms; that's the revolution I am initiating you into. You have to forget the future, you have to forget what should be. You have to only watch that which is; and that can be done right now, you need not postpone it. At any moment you can watch what you are. Don't condemn, because if you condemn then you cannot watch. Don't judge; if you judge you have already taken a prejudice. Don't be in a hurry to conclude. Life never comes to a conclusion; it cannot, because there is no death. It goes on and on, it is an eternal process, it never comes to a conclusion. Only stupid people come to conclusions.

The intelligent person goes on moving, flowing, growing. There is no end to it; even the sky is not the limit. The intelligent person goes on learning. He is a learner, and a learner forever. He never becomes knowledgeable.

This story is beautiful.

BAHAUDIN EL-SHAH, GREAT TEACHER OF THE NAQSHBANDI DERVISHES ONE DAY MET A CONFRERE IN THE GREAT SQUARE OF BOKHARA.

What is the meaning of "the great teacher"? The ordinary teacher only indoctrinates you, he gives you information. In the school, college, the university, that's what the teachers go on doing: they simply give you information, they feed you knowledge. Their whole function is to transfer knowledge from the older generation to the newer generation. They function as mediators between the going generation and the coming generation. They are agents of the past.

That's why your whole education system is always orthodox, conventional, conformist. It is never revolutionary. That's why revolution has not happened up to now, because revolution can happen only through education, only through right education. And your education is wrong education; it is mis-education.

Why is it wrong? It is wrong because it perpetuates the past against the future. It is wrong because it perpetuates the dead against the living. It is wrong because it goes on molding small children into patterns that their fathers and forefathers have decided. It is wrong because these children will not be living in the same world in which their fathers and forefathers had lived, so they will always be misfits. They are prepared for something, for some world, which exists no more.

Our whole system of education is stupid. It prepares you for a world which is no more in existence and it does not prepare you for a world which is coming, arising, which is dawning - so you will remain a misfit. You will never be able to live rightly. If you follow your education you will feel yourself out of date. If you follow the new world that is happening, then your education will not be of any help in it. You will be almost uneducated, and that hurts the ego.

The ego does not want to accept the fact that "I am uneducated." The ego always wants to be somebody special. That's why people go on bragging about their education, how many degrees they have. People enjoy degrees, certificates, diplomas very much; they are always exhibiting them.

Why? because the ego wants to be somebody special, and your education makes you special. You are a doctor, you are an engineer, a scientist, this and that. If you have no education you are simply a human being; you don't have any adjectives, you don't have any specialities with you. So people decide finally to cling to their education.

Clinging to the education is, in an indirect way, clinging to the past, and to cling to the past is to live a ghostly existence. You will never belong to this earth, you will never belong to the present. That you can sec. The more educated a person is, the less relevant he is to the times he lives in. He is very competent about the past, he is very competent about all that has been; but he is incapable of living herenow, and he is utterly incapable of penetrating into the future. He cannot be an inquirer, he cannot investigate. He becomes a believer. The teachers are agents, political agents, of the past - poisoning the future.

Then who is the great teacher? The great teacher is not in the service of the past. The great teacher is in the service of the future. The great teacher is in the service of the new, not of the old; that is the difference to be remembered.

This man, Bahaudin el-Shah, is a great teacher. He does not impart information, he imparts being.

He does not teach in an ordinary way, he finds extraordinary ways of provoking awareness. Rather than giving you verbal information, he creates situations.

Because I am creating situations here, I am in constant difficulty with this society, this rotten society that exists all around. I am creating situations here, and they have become accustomed to teachers, they have become completely unaware of the great teachers. They want me here just to read the Geeta and comment on it. I am creating situations, psychological situations and devices in which you can become aware of the great truths of life. Of course, those truths are contained in the Geeta, in the Bible, in the Koran too; but they are contained in a very ancient language which you cannot understand at all. And they were also given in particular situations. For example, the Geeta was given in a very particular situation: on the battlefield. Krishna was a great teacher. He had not chosen a secluded hermitage in the Himalayas to teach his disciple, Arjuna. He had chosen the battlefield. Armies were facing each other, everybody was ready to kill and murder or be killed and murdered. He had chosen such a tense situation, such an alive situation, such a dangerous situation, to impart something to his disciple. This is a great teacher.

And the people who have been commenting on the Geeta continuously, for CentUries, are just teachers, not great teachers. They are just informing people about what is the meaning of this word or that. Words don't count. Tn the final reckoning, only true situations count.

A great teacher is one who uses all kinds of living situations to provoke awareness in you - but then there are bound to be problems. The society feels angry. It is perfectly happy if you go on talking about the Koran, the Bible, the Vedas, because it doesn't do anything in the world; the reality remains the same, the vested interests remain the same. Nothing is harmed; on the contrary, all this spiritual talk helps the vested interests. It is safer if people are religious, because the so-called religious people are afraid people. They can't make any revolution, they can't move in any rebellion.

They can't disobey, because all these religious teachers and commentators go on teaching them the beautiful world of absolute obedience, conformity, contentment. They always go on teaching you how to become imitators, they don't teach you how to become authentic.

The authentic person will always be in conflict with the vested interests. If he wants to be authentic and true, he is bound to come in conflict with a false society. With whatsoever is false, he is bound to come in conflict.

The great teacher is not only a mediator between the past and you. A great teacher is a herald of the future. He makes you aware of the possible, of the potential.

BAHAUDIN EL-SHAH, GREAT TEACHER OF THE NAQSHBANDI DERVISHES, ONE DAY MET A CONFRERE IN THE GREAT SQUARE OF BOKHARA.

THE NEWCOMER WAS A WANDERING KALENDAR OF THE MALAMATI, THE "BLAMEWORTHY".

That is another order of the Sufis; Sufis have many orders, many schools. Those schools have arisen through different Masters. Whenever a Master exists on the earth, he introduces many methods, he creates many devices, and around the Master a school arises, a school where people go through alchemical changes.

Around a real Master a scientific lab exists. It is not just a retreat for the old people, as Indian ashramas have become. Old, retired, almost dead, one leg in the grave, just waiting to be thrown in any moment - for all these people Indian ashramas have become shelters.

This is not the purpose of an ashrama. An ashrama has to be a great lab, a great eXperiment into people's lives. It has to be a scientific process. If people are ready to pass through those processes, they come out totally changed. A mutation has to happen; only then have you been near a Master.

And it can happen only near a Master; the school arises only near a Master.

The great Sufi Master, Rumi, has said:

Footprints but come to the ocean's shore.

Therein, no trace remains.

All your scriptures only come to the ocean's shore. They can't take you into the journey of the unknown, they remain part of the known.

Then who is going to take you into the ocean, into the uncharted? Only if you trust somebody, only if you love somebody so deeply that you are ready to risk your life... A Master is a person who creates trust in you that, "Yes, it is worth risking." His presence is charismatic, magnetic. Once you have tasted the love of a Master, you are ready to go wherever he is going, not knowing where he is going. He cannot convince you of where he is going because the unknowable cannot be communicated through words. And even if he tries to communicate, you will not understand it; you will understand something else.

Between a Master and a disciple there is a problem: the Master speaks from his vision, from his Everest, from his peak of consciousness, and the disciple hears from his darkness, his valley. The moment the words reach to the disciple, they have changed their color, their meaning.

Just the other day I was reading:

In the UN they have developed computers that can translate one language into another. Ideally, if the translated passage Were then translated by computer back into the first language, the original words ought to be regained. This, however, does not allow for the ambiguity of languages. There is the story of the computer that was ordered to translate a common English phrase into Russian and then translate the Russian translation back into English.

What went in was: Out of sight, out of mind.

This phrase was to be translated into Russian and then back into English.

What came out was: Invisible insanity. That's what happens continuously between a Master and a disciple. And remember, the difference is far greater than between Russian and English. Russian and English are not so different, the distance is not so big; but the distance between a Master and a disciple, between the one who is awakened and the one who is fast asleep and snoring, is immense. They are worlds apart. So even if the Master tries - and he tries hard, but the result is very disappointing - what reaches to the disciple is something absolutely different; and not only different, but diametrically opposite. Then the Master has to find some other ways, not direct, but indirect. Bahaudin used this situation.

The Sufi dervish that had come to Bahaudin's school was a wandering Kalendar. "Kalendar" is the name of the Sufis who belong to the Malamati Order. Their name is beautiful, just as the name of the school of Bahaudin is beautiful. Bahaudin's disciples are known as Naqshbandis; it means "the Designers". He was a great designer, and you will see it in this story. He used this design to provoke something. He was a great designer, a naqshband; hence the order is known as the Order of the Naqshbandis.

But the Order of Malamati is also one of the most beautiful orders. Malamati means the "Blameworthy". The basis of the Malamati Order is: never blame others, always blame yourself; that will bring transformation.

The general tendency of the human mind is to throw the blame on somebody. That is a way to protect yourself, but then you remain the same.

Watch. We know at least five thousand years' history that has been going on and on in different names, but the same thing goes on. In the beginning people used to believe, "What can we do? The real doer is God, so whatsoever he is doing, he is doing. It is beyond our capacity to change. " That is a trick to throw the whole responsibility on God's shoulders; then you are freed. Then if you are a thief, what can you do? And if you are a murderer, you are a murderer - what can you do? It is God who decides. In India they say - for five thousand years they have been saying this - that not even a leaf moves without his order. The very idea has kept the East poor, starved, ugly, dirty. The very idea: "What can we do? God is the doer," has created a subtle, spiritual laziness, a very deep sleep. The East has lived in deep sleep, in an utterly helpless way.

But this has happened in other countries too, in different names. In the beginning it was always God, then by and by people started suspecting whether God exists or not. Slowly, slowly the existence of God became doubtful, but we needed some scapegoat to throw our responsibilities on - then the idea of fate, then the idea of your past lives, karmas: that you have done something in the past life and now everything is determined by it. You cannot do anything, you are caught in the trap of your past lives.

Now, you cannot go back and change your past lives, so everything is destined. Just see the point: God is no more there, so you need something else - the theory of karma, or fate, kismet, luck. Slowly, slowly these things also became worthless; then new ideas, but the game remains the same.

Then Darwin said that it is evolution, the evolutionary forces: man is not free, he is just a part of the evolutionary forces - and they are tremendous! Man is simply moving in those forces. Those forces are the determining factors; you cannot do anything else, you are just a by-product. Whatsoever you are, you are at the mercy of the evolutionary forces.

Now, it is another name for God, another name for karma, another name for fate. Nothing has changed. Just a scientific explanation, but the psychological trick is the same.

Then there was Karl Marx, and he said: it is not evolution, it is the economic structure of the society that determines everything. He said it is not consciousness that determines the society and its structure; just the vice versa is the truth: it is the society and its economic structure that determines consciousness, so you cannot do anything directly unless the society changes.

It is the same: unless God's mind changes, unless fate changes; now it is the economic structure.

And it is very inevitable you cannot go against it, everything is determined by it.

Then came Sigmund Freud, and he said: it is the unconscious that determines everything, your instinctive nature.

These are all explanations for the same trick, and the trick is one: blame something on someone so that you can feel good and you can continue as you are, so that there is no need to go through any change.

This Order of the Sufis called the "Blameworthy" say, "I am responsible, all blame is mine." Just for a moment let this thought sink into your heart: I am responsible. Then suddenly two things start happening in you: one, if I am responsible, then change is possible; second, if I am responsible, then there is no point in blaming others and constantly quarreling. And then there is no point in waiting for the whole world to change. You will not be here. Even if the whole world changes some day - it is not going to change; but even if it changes - you will not be here.

Something has to be done right now, immediately, because your life is very short. You cannot wait for eternity - for communism to come, for a classless society to happen, for a utopia to be fulfilled, or for the second coming of Christ; or when things have gone very badly, Krishna will come and deliver you. All nonsense!

But the basic trick is the same: that "I am not responsible. Something has to happen to me; I cannot do anything."

This is my approach here too, the same approach. All of these psychological groups that you have to go through are basically rooted in the idea that you are responsible, take your responsibility on your own shoulders. In the beginning it hurts. It hurts because when you see the stupidity of your behavior - that your misery is created by yourself - it hurts. It always feels good and nice that somebody else is responsible for your misery, what can you do? The moment you see that you have been slapping your own face, nobody is slapping you, then it looks very stupid to continue.

Then it seems meaningless to go on crying and complaining, "Why am I being beaten?" - and you are slapping yourself. If you don't want to be beaten, don't slap yourself. If you enjoy it, then don't complain.

This is the latest development in humanistic psychologies, but this has been the foundation of the Order of the Blameworthy. Sufis were the first psychologists in the world. Their approach is very psychological.

In the beginning, certainly, it feels very bad, because suddenly all the burden that you had been throwing on others falls on your own head. You feel crushed, but only in the beginning. If you can survive the beginning...

And that's the whole purpose of living in a commune where you know that others have survived, that you will not be killed by this burden; where you know that others have gone through it and have become silent and blissful; where you know others have gone through it and not only survived, but have become purified; that the fire is not your enemy; that the suffering gives you maturity; where you can see all kinds of people in all kinds of stages. That is the meaning of a school, a spiritual school: a place where you see the beginners, where you see the people who have gone a little farther ahead than the beginners, and the people who have reached almost to the middle of their journey, and the people who have gone beyond the middle, and then the people who are just reaching to the goal; and at least one Master who has reached. It is a place where you can see the whole spectrum of spiritual stages, where you can see the whole journey. It gives courage. You know that you are not moving in a cul-de-sac, that you are not moving in darkness, that you are not moving into some kind of illusion, hallucination, that your efforts are going to bring results. You can see the results all around.

When a seed can see that the other seeds have sprouted, when the seed can see that a few other seeds have not only sprouted but become great bushes, when the seed can see that a few bushes have started giving fruit and flowers and are in bloom, a great desire, a longing, arises in the heart of the seed to jump into the soil and die. Then the seed is not afraid of dying because he knows through dying is resurrection. He can see the resurrection: the whole garden is the proof.

The schools of the Sufis have always been called " the garden of the Master." They have been called "the garden of the Master" for this particular purpose: they are places where you can see all the stages possible. That very experience of meeting people at different stages keeps you on the go.

Otherwise the journey is really in the dark, unknown. If there is only the Master and the disciples and there are not people in between, it will be very difficult for you to connect with the Master. A chain is needed.

You cannot see Everest, it is too far away beyond the clouds; but you can see a few people who are ahead of you, and then a few people who are still more ahead of you; and then you can see a few people who are just near the clouds, and they are shouting to you, "Don't be worried. We can see beyond the clouds; there is a peak." This helps. This is the meaning of a school.

Malamati is one of the most significant Sufi schools, and its basis is now a recognized fact - that you are responsible for whatsoever you are. If you are miserable you are responsible. In the beginning it hurts; the old joy of blaming others is gone. It is a joy when you can blame others.

Freudian psychoanalysis goes on blaming the mother, the father. It is a great joy: so you are not responsible; your mother is responsible, your father is responsible. It is the old game.

First God was responsible; he is the Great Father. And what else? Now you cannot believe in the Great Father, but you can see that your father is there, your mother is there; psychoanalysis throws the responsibility - your mother is responsible.

All these schools keep you tethered to your ignorance. All these doctrines are hindrances for growth.

Growth is possible only when you have taken the whole responsibility on yourself. In the beginning it hurts, but soon you start feeling a new thrill, a new adventure, because soon you become aware that if you are responsible, then there is a way to go beyond. If others are responsible, then there is no way to go beyond. Then you are doomed. If you are responsible, then certainly something can be done. If you are creating your misery, you can uncreate it. If others are creating it, what can you do?

And remember, it is not only the ordinary, worldly people who have been thinking in this way. Even the so-called spiritual people think in this way. People come to me and they say, "What can We do?

We live in the family, in the marketplace. We have wives and children and parents and we have to look after them. How can we meditate? How can we be pure and honest and authentic? First we will have to leave the whole world. We will have to renounce the world. We will have to go to the Himalayan caves, then." But that day never comes. This is a way of postponing.

And the trick is the same: the wife is responsible. It is not your sexual lust, it is the wife. There are scriptures which go on condemning women. They must have been written by neurotics. How can a man of understanding condemn women? - they have not done anything to you. But there are scriptures and so-called saints who have been declaring down the ages that the woman is the door to hell.These people must have been in a very perverted state. It is your lust. Rather than understanding the ways of lust, the ways of greed, the ways of possessiveness, the ways of jealousy, you throw the responsibility on the poor woman. And where is the poor woman going to throw the responsibility? Women have not been allowed to write scriptures, otherwise they would have thrown it on the man. Man has been very cunning. He has not allowed them to read scriptures, to write scriptures; no, not at all. They have been kept completely ignorant. Otherwise they would write, "The man is responsible; man is the door to hell. " That would hurt your so-called saints very much.

Nobody is responsible for whatsoever you are. Only you are responsible. This is the beginning of real spirituality.

That's why I don't say to my sannyasins to leave the world, renounce the world, no. Renouncing is based on a false logic that the world is responsible. You can renounce the world and you can go to the Himalayas, but you will be the same person there. How can you leave your mind? You have only left the outer situation, and the inner is with you; it will again create the outer situation. It is not going to help.

One man came to me once and he said, "I want to commit suicide. " So I said, "Okay, go and do it.

Why have you come to me? Why waste time?" He was shocked, because he had really come so that I could console him, convince him, that there was no need to commit suicide, that it was not right, that it was a sin. When I said, "You go and commit. Why have you come? Why are you wasting your time?" he was shocked, taken aback. For a moment he could not say a single word. I said, "What are you waiting for? Go and commit! I want to tell you just one thing: you are in for a surprise." He said, "What do you mean?" I said, "You will know: Commit suicide... you will still remain. That's what I am saying. You are in for a surprise; you will still remain after suicide. Then come and tell me. And you will be the same, and soon you will be in another womb and you will start the same nonsense again.

"This is not a right way to commit suicide. If you really want to commit suicide, then become a sannyasin."

He said, "What do you mean?"

"Then we can really kill you, and then there is no possibility to survive! And then you will not enter into another womb again. But the real thing has to be done in your interiority. Dropping the outer body won't help, but changing the inner mind certainly brings great transformation. "

So first it may look a little sad, that "I am responsible," and you may cry for a few days and weep - and that's good, it cleanses the eyes. Then suddenly, by and by, you will start becoming aware that you are free. Just the idea that "I am responsible" brings freedom. No, you are no more in the hands of others. You are free to be miserable if you choose to be so; you are free not to be miserable if you choose not to be so. You are free.

That is the meaning of sannyas, that is what sannyas is all about: freedom. But freedom has nothing to do with outer changes, freedom has something to do with inner understanding. And this is the basis of freedom: that I am responsible. Responsibility brings freedom. Throwing responsibility on others keeps you a slave.

BAHAUDIN WAS SURROUNDED BY DISCIPLES.

" FROM WHERE DO YOU COME?" HE ASKED THE TRAVELER, IN THE USUAL SUFI PHRASE.

"I HAVE NO IDEA," SAID THE OTHER, GRINNING FOOLISHLY.

This story has two meanings. The first is given by Bahaudin himself, the second is only indicated - and I will give you the second meaning too. Bahaudin has given only the first meaning because the people he must have been surrounded by were not yet capable of understanding the second meaning. But he has indicated it, he has left the seed of it. Unless you are worthy, nothing can be told to you.

Now there are a few sannyasins here who are worthy of receiving the second meaning too, so first we will see what meaning Bahaudin gives.

He asked, "From where do you come?" It is just a formal question.

"I HAVE NO IDEA," SAID THE OTHER, GRINNING FOOLISHLY.

Bahaudin says that he is pretending, he is playing the role, acting the role of humanity; and this is the situation. From where have you come? You don't have any idea. You are here, but from where?

Why? To where?

I have heard...

A man who had a few drinks too many fell from a fifth floor window.

Soon a crowd of people had gathered around him. Then a policeman came along, pushed his way through the crowd and said, "What is going on here?"

"I don't know," said the drunk. "I have only just got here myself. "

This is the situation that you are in: fallen from some unknown, from the blue, not knowing at all from where you are coming. And if you don't know from where you are coming, how can you know where you are going? still you think there is great purpose in life; still you think that your life is meaningful.

You are deceiving yourself.

And you have got all that is needed for you to know, but you are not using it. You have got the guitar but you are not playing it, so the music is not heard. You have got the potential of being aware, which can reveal all the secrets of - from where you are coming and where you are going and who you are, but you have not been digging into it; and that is the first thing any intelligent person will do.

I have heard the story of a courting couple:

One night they were sitting on a bench in the moonlight, and the odor of flowers permeated the atmosphere. It was a time and a circumstance which would inevitably engender romance in the heart of anybody. And John said to Mary, "Mary, if you was not what you is, what would you like to be?"

And Mary said, "John, if I was not what I is, I would like to be an American Beauty rose." Then Mary turned the question on John and said, "John, if you was not what you is, what would you like to be?"

John said, "If I was not what I is, I would like to be an octopus."

Mary said, "John, what is an octopus?" John said, "An octopus is some kind of fish or an animal or something that has a thousand arms. "

Mary said, "John, if you was an octopus and had a thousand arms, what would you do with all those arms?"

John said, "I would put every one of them around you."

Mary said, "Go away, John. You ain't using the two you already got. "

But this is the situation of humanity: you are not using that which you have already got - and you have got all that is needed. God never sends you into the world unprepared. Everything that is needed on life's pilgrimage is provided, already provided.

"Where are you going? From where are you coming?" The man said, "I have no idea."

SOME OF BAHAUDIN'S DISCIPLES MURMURED THEIR DISAPPROVAL OF THIS DISRESPECT.

There are people who only see the outer; they cannot see the inner. They could not see the man, that he was acting a role. He was not a fool, but he was behaving foolishly. But great intelligence is needed to see things as they are. Fools can deceive you if they pretend to be knowledgeable, and intelligent people can befool you if they pretend to be idiots.

You can't see, you have lost all vision and perspective. And the reason you can't see is because you have not even;seen yourself.

"WHERE ARE YOU GOING?" PERSISTED BAHAUDIN.

"I DO NOT KNOW, " SHOUTED THE DERVISH.

"WHAT IS GOOD?" BY NOW A LARGE CROWD HAD GATHERED.

"I DO NOT KNOW."

"WHAT IS EVIL? "

"I HAVE NO IDEA. "

" WHAT IS RIGHT?"

"WHATEVER IS GOOD FOR ME."

"WHAT IS WRONG?"

"WHATEVER IS BAD FOR ME."

Just listen to these answers, and you can see that the man has a great vision. Whatsoever he is saying is true about ninety-nine point nine percent of people; and it was true about the crowd that was standing there, but nobody could detect it. It was so simple; nobody could think that he was simply answering the way humanity is behaving.

If somebody asks you, "From where are you coming?" what answer are you going to give?

A Zen Master asked a newcomer, "From where are you coming?" and the newcomer said, "The trees are green, and flowers have bloomed, and it is tremendously beautiful here." Now this is the answer of one who knows. The man is saying, "I am not coming from anywhere; I have always been here. "

Raman Maharshi was dying, and the disciples started crying and weeping, naturally. Raman opened his eyes and he said, "Why are you crying?" One disciple asked, "Bhagwan, where will you be going?" Raman said, "What nonsense are you talking about? I am going to be here. I have not come from anywhere and I am not going anywhere. I have always been here and I will always be here. "

Because the innermost core is eternal, it never comes, never goes. It has no birth, no death. If you know, then your answer will be this. If you don't know, then you will say, "I am coming from Bombay,"

or from London or from New York. And where are you going? Then you will say, "To Kathmandu, to Kabul, or to Goa."

That man could have answered the same way, but he really played a beautiful drama: he behaved like humanity.

If somebody asks, "What is right?" what are you going to answer. What is right? You may quote scriptures, but that won't do. If you really look inside yourself, the man has answered for you; he said, "Whatever is good for me." Whatsoever is good for me is right - that's how people are behaving.

I have heard:

Herman Katz lay dying. He called his wife Rebecca to his side and said, "Rebecca, I am dying, I am not going to be around much longer, so please do me a favor. Put on your green silk dress and your alligator shoes and red nail polish and fix up your hair and put on your mink coat and all your jewelry. "

"Herman, have you gone crazy?" asked Rebecca. "This is the middle of August in New York City, you are a dying man, and you want I should put on my green silk dress, my mink coat, my alligator shoes, all my jewelry, and red nail polish? What is the matter with you?"

Herman Katz groaned in pain and said, "Rebecca, please, is this the moment to argue with a dying man? Please, do me this favor: put on your green silk dress, your alligator shoes, your mink coat, all your jewelry, and red fingernail polish, and come sit by the side of the bed. "

So Rebecca, to humor him, puts on her green silk dress, her alligator shoes, her mink coat, all her jewelry, fixes up her hair, puts on red fingernail polish, and sits down by the side of Herman's bed.

Herman Katz looks at her admiringly. His eyes shine with love and he says, "Rebecca, you are a beautiful woman. You are still, even after all these years, a stunningly attractive woman. Rebecca, when the good Lord God comes to finally take me away - who knows - maybe he will change his mind and decide to take you instead. "

That's what everybody is doing in the world: whatsoever is good for me is right, even if the other has to die. This is the whole politics of the world. Everybody is political in this world because everybody is living with this idea: whatsoever is good for me is right. Then by right means or wrong means, it doesn't matter. Everybody is selfish.

Even your so-called spiritual people are selfish, very selfish - maybe more than you. If they renounce the world, they are renouncing only to gain the joys of heaven. It is just a projection of greed, ambition, lust, and nothing else.

And Bahaudin asked, "WHAT IS WRONG??"

"WHATEVER IS BAD FOR ME. "

THE CROWD, IRRITATED BEYOND ITS PATIENCE BY THIS DERVISH, DROVE HIM AWAY. HE WENT OFF, STRIDING PURPOSEFULLY IN A DIRECTION WHICH LED NOWHERE, AS FAR AS ANYONE KNEW.

"FOOLS" SAID BAHAUDIN NAQSHBAND. "THIS MAN IS ACTING THE PART OF HUMANITY. WHILE YOU WERE DESPISING HIM, HE WAS DELIBERATELY DEMONSTRATING HEEDLESSNESS AS EACH OF YOU DOES, ALL UNAWARE, EVERY DAY OF YOUR LIVES."

Bahaudin has used the situation in a tremendously beautiful way. The crowd must have been shocked; for a moment the thinking of those people must have stopped.

Truth always shocks, because we have lived so much in lies that whenever a fragment of truth even a fragment - reaches into our hearts, it is an electric shock. One is stoned, one cannot even breathe for a moment.

Now, to say it verbally would not have served the purpose. The situation revealed it. This is a design.

There is every possibility that the dervish was invited by Bahaudin. There is every possibility that he was a guest, and Bahaudin had asked him to come behave in such a way so he could show people how unaware they were.

Sherlock Holmes, that master detective, was sitting in his favorite chair smoking his pipe and reading a book when he heard a knock at the door. It was his loyal friend and assistant, Doctor Watson.

"Ah, good morning, Watson. Don't you find it a bit warm to be wearing your red flannel underwear"

Doctor Watson was astonished by this brilliant stroke of deductive logic. "Holmes," Doctor Watson said, "how on earth did you guess that I was wearing my red flannel underwear?"

"Elementary, my dear Doctor Watson. You forgot to put your pants on. "

People are moving without pants - without awareness of what they are doing, of what they are not doing, of where they are going; and when you tell them the truth, they think you have revealed something great, "a great experiment in deductive logic".

Buddhas have been telling you simple truths. No logic is involved at all. Just looking at you is enough: you are not wearing pants! But you go on believing that you are wearing pants.

Man is unawareness, and man need not be. Man can become a light of awareness. And only when you are a light of awareness is your life worth living, is your life LIFE; otherwise you are simply dragging, somehow managing, pulling. It is ugly, it is desert-like. It has not known anything worth knowing. It has not seen beauty, it has not experienced good, it has not been able to touch anything that is sacred. It has not come across truth; it cannot - if you remain unaware.

The only thing needed is to wake up.

And remember, you can even dream that you are awake, and many are doing that too. Have you not dreamed sometimes that in the dream you think you are awake and that you are going to the office?

And then your wife comes and pulls you out of your bed and says, "What are you doing? And you are getting late, you have to go to the office, and it is not Sunday. " Then you jump out of the bed, then you become aware that you were dreaming. That dream was a trick of the mind.

Have you not dreamed sometimes, when your bladder is full in the night and you start dreaming, that you are going to the bathroom and you are in the bathroom? That is just a trick so that the sleep remains undisturbed.

Dream is a support to your sleep. Ordinarily people think that dream is a disturbance in sleep; that is not right. All the psychological investigation that has gone into dreaming has proved something just the opposite. Now the psychologists who have been working on dreaming and sleep say that dreaming is a friend of sleep, not a disturbance. It keeps you asleep; otherwise there are a thousand and one chances of your waking up in the night. But the dream gives you an explanation, a beautiful explanation.

For example, you have fixed the alarm and the alarm goes off. You want to get up; it is three o'clock.

You wanted to get up to catch a train, and it is cold, and you are sleepy, and the alarm goes off: you start having a dream that you are passing by the side of a hillock, and on the hill there is a beautiful temple, and the temple bells are ringing. Now a trick, a rationalization: the mind says, "It is not the alarm clock, it is just temple bells ringing." And you turn over and pull up your blanket and tuck yourself in well and go to sleep.

Your dreams are in the service of your sleep; they serve your sleep. They always manage to give you some explanation.

There are many people who think that they are alert. They are not. There are many people who think they are virtuous. They are not. There are many people who go on thinking a thousand and one things, but they are not those things; those are just dreams.

And remember this faculty of the mind: that it can rationalize anything.

A man walking along a country lane encountered an old lady who was holding two kettles up to her ears. He could not help asking her what she was doing.

"Well, if you hold two kettles to your ears," the old woman said, "you can hear a noise like a football match."

The man took the two kettles, held them up to his ears for a while, then said, "I can't hear anything."

"Ha ha ha " cackled the old lady. "It must be halftime."

You can always find an explanation. Explanations help you to remain the way you are.

If you really want to move in a new world, in a new consciousness, stop making explanations for your dreams. And even if the fact hurts, let it hurt, but don't hide it behind a fiction.

You go on doing things that you don't want to do. You go on not doing things that you always wanted to do. You live in a very divided way. See to it that this division disappears. This division is the cause of all your misery and hell. A divided person is a miserable person, and a divided person is in constant turmoil; he is in a civil war, fighting with himself. And all your politicians and priests want you to continue fighting with yourself so that they can go on exploiting you, so you don't have enough energy to fight with them.

If you are fighting with yourself you can't have energy enough to be rebellious. This is the basic strategy which has been perpetuated down the ages by all kinds of exploiters: divide the man and rule. And they have divided you in two: the outer and the inner, the lower and the higher, the good and the bad, the actual and the ideal, the earthly and the heavenly, the worldly and the other-worldly.

They have divided everything. You are living in thousands of fragments.

Drop all these divisions. See it: that these divisions are your enemies. Renounce these divisions, become utterly one.

And what is the way to become one? Just accept your actuality. There is no other reality. You are the reality. Accept your reality, and in that very acceptance, grace descends. In that very acceptance, intelligence arises, because you accumulate so much energy. Not fighting, energy goes on and on; you become a reservoir of energy. And energy is delight. And great energy is great delight.

You can become infinite energy. You are, but you are caught in traps. Those traps have beautiful names, names of religion, morality, ethics, virtue; beautiful names.

Your prison is called the temple, the mosque, the gurudwara, the church. Your jailers have become your priests. Your scriptures have become your knowledge and are preventing your wisdom from arising. And all that you have been doing has not helped you to become aware, so now do something that can make you aware.

What can make you aware? Seeing the point that the society is not interested in your blissfulness or in your awareness, one drops out of this society. And by dropping out I don't mean that you escape to the Himalayas. You remain in it, but deep down you are no more in it. That is sannyas. That's what it means to become a Sufi.

A man wanted to commit suicide. To make sure he did the job, he got a bottle of poison, a rope, a gun, some gasoline, and matches.

Pouring the gasoline all over his clothing, he climbed a tree and crawled out on a branch overhanging a lake. He hung himself from the limb, drank the poison, set his clothing on fire, and then shot himself.

Alas! He missed his head, the bullet hit the rope, he fell into the water and the water put the flames out. He swallowed so much water that the poison became harmless. Then he had to swim as hard as he could in order to save his life.

This is your situation. Beware. Watch what you are doing. Watch each act. De-automatize each act. Remain constantly alert. Walking, watch each step. Eating, watch. Even while going to sleep, go watchfully into it, into what is happening: slowly, slowly the body relaxes, the limbs relax. Watch, feel... the coolness of the bedsheet, the softness of the pillow. Be sensitive, be watchful: then slowly, slowly the mind is moving into an her dimension, the dimension of sleep; you are just in between - a little awake, a little asleep. Watch. Go on watching, go on watching as long as you can, and one day it happens: you fall asleep, and yet watching continues. Then one learns how to watch the dreams.

Then on another level, one day you can even watch your deep sleep, dreamless sleep. And then finally, when you have been able to watch your waking life, your dream life, your sleep life, you have arrived to the fourth state. Just the other day I was talking about turiya, the fourth state. You have come home, you are alert.

This is one explanation that Bahaudin gave to his disciples, but hidden in it is another. Those disciples must not have been worthy enough, so he only indicated.

He says, "FOOLS! THIS MAN IS ACTING THE PART OF HUMANITY. WHILE YOU WERE DESPISING HIM, HE WAS DELIBERATELY DEMONSTRATING HEEDLESSNESS AS EACH OF YOU DOES, ALL UNAWARE, EVERY DAY OF YOUR LIVES."

But who can act? Only one who has gone out of the act. Who can behave in such a way and depict humanity in its actuality, without any pretensions? Only one who has reached to the fourth stage, only one who is a witness now, aware, alert.

It is reported that Jesus was thought to be a fool. It is also reported that Francis was also thought to be a fool; and so was the case with Bodhidharma, the founder of Zen in China; and so has the case been with thousands of Zen, Sufi, and Hasid mystics. They have been thought to be fools, and they were the most alert people. But they behaved like fools just to make you aware. If you could not see it in your own life, they fUnctioned as mirrors so that you could see your ugly face.

But people are such that if they see some mirror reflects their ugly face, they will destroy the mirror.

They will say, "This mirror is not right. I am such a beautiful person, and this mirror must be a distorting mirror.

That's why people killed Jesus; he was a mirror, and showed you in your total ugliness and nakedness. And they poisoned Socrates; he was a mirror, one of the best mirrors ever.

Why do people become so angry with these people? Why are they so angry with me? Their anger is that what they are doing unconsciously is being done consciously here, deliberately. They can't understand it. They can't see the point. They become angry against the mirror.

This place is a mirror: it will show you in all your dirt, it will show you in all your perversions. It will need courage to be here. And if you are really courageous, then yours is going to be a great blessing. You can go beyond those perversions, because the only way to go beyond is by becoming aware, alert, watchful, a witness.

This man must have been a great mystic in his own right. He must have been invited by Bahaudin.

He belonged to another school; that's why he must have been invited, so nobody would recognize, so nobody would think that he was a Sufi at all, so his behavior would be thought of as the behavior of a madman. It is very easy to understand the behavior of someone who belongs to your own school; it is difficult to understand the behavior of one who does not belong to your own school.

For example, Christians will not be able to understand Mahavira standing naked, and Jainas will not be able to understand Jesus being crucified either. Do you know what Jainas say? Once a Jaina monk came to see me and he said, "You talk about Mahavira, but in the same breath you talk about Jesus. That doesn't look right. Jesus cannot be compared to Mahavira. Mahavira is the enlightened one. Jesus is not the enlightened one - maybe a good man, but not enlightened." I said, "Why do you say that he is not enlightened?" He said, "How can he be enlightened? The theory of karma proves that: he was crucified, and one can be crucified only if he has committed great sins in his past." Now that is a Jaina explanation.

They say when Mahavira used to move - he was naked, barefooted - on the mud roads of Bihar, if there were thorns on the road, either those thorns would jump outside the road because Mahavira was coming, or they would turn upside down so his feet were not hurt - because he was the purest one. All his karmas were burned; now no suffering was possible for him.

If this is the explanation, then certainly Jesus was a sinner, not a savior at all. If Jesus comes in the community of the Jainas, he will be thought of as a sinner. They may have compassion on him, but they cannot respect him.

And the same will happen to Mahavira, because the Christians will ask, "What service have you done to humanity? The savior is one who serves." Now Mahavira never opened a hospital, never ran a school, never went in search of lepers to kiss them. He will look utterly selfish just standing under beautiful green trees, meditating. "The world is suffering and you are meditating? What more selfishness is possible?" The world is on fire and Mahavira is enjoying ecstasies. What kind of man is this? He may be a good man, but not a savior - and utterly selfish.

It is very difficult to understand somebody who belongs to a different gestalt of thinking, a different style of life. Only a man who has arrived can see that Jesus, Mahavira, Krishna, Buddha, and many others, are all the same. Only one reality has expressed through them - in different languages, of course, in different styles of course. They have all painted the same reality; their paintings are different.

For example, if you bring ten painters and the sun is setting and you tell them to paint, do you think their paintings will all be the same? Although they are painting the same reality, they are going to be different. And the greater the painters, the greater will be the difference. If they are just photographers, not real painters, then maybe the paintings will look alike. If they are real painters, geniuses - if Van Gogh is painting, and Picasso and Goya and Gauguin - then those paintings will be utterly different. You will not be able to figure out that it is the same sunset. Their individuality, their signature, will be there.

When Mahavira reflects, he is reflecting the same God, the same truth as Jesus, as Mohammed, as Bahaudin; but it is always difficult to recognize somebody who comes from a different gestalt.

That's why those people missed; otherwise he would have been seen as an awakened soul, an awakened consciousness. He must have been an enlightened person. His answers are almost like Bodhidharma's: that is the second meaning, the deeper meaning of the story.

Emperor Wu in China asked Bodhidharma, "Who are you?" and Bodhidharma said, "I don't know, sir. " And Bodhidharma was the one who knew. If he did not know, then nobody knew. And he said, "I don't know." Even Emperor Wu missed. Thinking that he himself had said he did not know, then what was the point? He felt frustrated, because he had been waiting for Bodhidharma to come from India; it had taken years for him to reach China. Seeing Wu, Bodhidharma felt, "He has not understood my answer"; he turned back. He crossed the border of Wu's kingdom, went into the mountains.

Later on Wu repented very much, because another Zen Master told him, "You are a fool. You could not understand. His statement was the absolute statement - 'I don't know' - for many reasons. First, he was no more as an individual, his ego had disappeared" - what Sufis call FANA FI'LLAH, 'the drop has dropped into the ocean', so who is there to know? - that's why he said,'I don't know.'

"And secondly, in that ultimate knowing, there is nobody who knows and nobody who is known. The division between the subject and the object disappears; there is nobody who knows and nobody who is known. The knower becomes the known. Yes, there is a kind of awareness, but it is neither subjective nor objective. It is "transjective"; it is transcendental to both. That's why he said,'I don't know.' How could he claim knowledge? Knowledge is claimed only by stupid people. He had claimed ignorance and innocence. You missed the whole point. "

But then it was too late. They searched for Bodhidharma. By the time they found him in the mountains, Wu had died. On the grave of Wu it was written: "I am sorry. If you ever come here, please forgive me, Master Bodhidharma. I am utterly sorry and repentful I could not understand your answer; it was too big for my understanding. It was beyond me. " This is another explanation.

Remember both, one from your side, one from my side.

Meditate over this beautiful parable.