How Can You Deceive?

The first question:

Question 1:

VIDYA, IT IS SO, YOU ARE CLOSE AND YOU ARE DISTANT, and at the same time. Your being is close, but your dreaming is not close and cannot be close. You ARE close, but your mind - which is not really you - cannot be close. The more mind you have, the more distant you are.

Right now you are two: one is your authentic being, your essential being, your unchanging, eternal being. You are close. Not only close but you are one with me, because the eternal being is only one.

It is a flight, as Plotinus says, of the alone to the alone. But you are a duality. Your being is hidden behind many layers of becoming. You are like an onion: layers and layers of becoming. You want to be this, you want to be that....

Those layers keep you far away - not only far away but unbridgeable far away, unapproachably far away. I cannot approach you when you are in a dream. The dream is unapproachable. In your dream, you are absolutely lonely. You cannot invite even your beloved, your friend; in your dream you cannot invite even your Master. Your dream is utterly private. Hence, it is false.

Reality is universal. It is not private. Your dream is idiotic - that is the actual meaning of the word 'idiot': to live in a private world, which does not correspond with reality, to live in IDIOT. The idiot lives in a private world. The wise man lives in the universal - that which is.

And you are living in both! Hence, this split. You will feel close to me when you look at your being, and there will be moments of being. Watching a sunset, suddenly you are close to me. Listening to the song of a bird, suddenly all distance has disappeared. Looking at a flower, and there is not even an inch's difference between me and you.

These moments of eternity will be there. But then again you fall in the dream, in the sleep, in your private world - then you are far away. Don't be puzzled by it. This is so with everybody. Slowly slowly, help those moments when you feel close to me, because THEY are the only real moments.

To gain them is to gain the kingdom of God. To miss them is to miss all.

Come out of your IDIOT! Come out of your idiotic world of dreaming! You cannot become anything else than you already are - hence the whole effort is idiotic. You can only become that which you already are. Remember it again and again: you can only become that which you already are. And, hence, there is no need to become because you already ARE it. Rejoice in it! Celebrate it! Be it!

The second question:

Question 2:

KRISHNA, DESIRE IS DESIRE FOR SOMETHING that is outside you. Desire is objective. Longing is not objective. Longing is for that which wants to explode in you. It is inner, it is subjective. If a rose wants to become a lotus, it is a desire. But if the rose LONGS to become a rose, it is longing. If the seed wants to sprout and become a tree, it is a longing! It is perfectly in order. It is how it should be.

But if a seed wants to become a butterfly, it is a desire.

Desire is absurd: longing is existential. Longing is perfectly beautiful: desire is dangerous. And the distinction is very delicate and one has to be very much alert.

Longing is opening of the inner: desire is accumulation of the outer. Man desires money: man longs for meditation. Man desires power: man longs for purity. Man desires knowledge: man longs for awareness. Man desires the world: man longs for God.

That which is intrinsic to you is longing. Divert your energies from desire into longing. Desire distracts you from your Tao, from your Dharma, from your nature. Desire takes you astray. It allures you into fantasies which are not possible. It drives you crazy, because it gives you hopes which cannot be fulfilled, which are unfulfillable. Time, energy, life, will be wasted, and in the end only frustration in the hands and in the heart.

Longing is fulfillment.

If you want to become a rich man, you are desiring. But if you want to become a sannyasin, it is a longing. Desiring depends on others: in longing there is no need to depend on anybody else. It is your own flowering. It is already there - just it needs the right soil and the right time It is waiting for the spring to come....

The third question:

Question 3:

YES, IF THE MASTER WILLS SO. Sometimes the Master wants to be deceived. If it is for your growth, he is ready to do anything - even to be deceived. If that is the only way to help your cheating characteristic to surface, he will allow himself to be deceived by you. Otherwise not.

How can you deceive a Master? He knows you - as you your-self don't know yourself. He knows the secret most desire of your heart. It may not be conscious even to you. He knows the subtle ways of your ego. And you CANNOT deceive. You can try, but from one point or another, from one side or another, they will be revealed. You will say one thing from your mouth: your eyes will say something else.

And the Master is not very much concerned with what you say - he tries to read you through subtle manifestations. He looks in your eyes, he looks at the way you walk, he looks at the way you sit...

from the superficial to the deepest. He is not very much concerned about what you say. Your saying is almost meaningless; it is babbling. You don't exactly know what you are saying. And even if you know, you don't mean it. And even if you mean it, the next moment you will change it. It is not worth paying attention to.

That's why psychoanalysis has to go into your dreams. Rather than watching your day it watches your night. Why? Because in the day you are cunning, deceptive. You live through a masquerade, a camouflage. You have many masks. And it is not that you are deceiving others: you are deceived yourself by your masks. You. believe in your masks. You think these are your faces. You have completely forgotten your original face.

Psychoanalysis looks into your dreams, because in your dreams your constant pretending relaxes.

You come in your true colors.

The Master goes even deeper than psychoanalysis, because there are people who can deceive even in dreams. One can train oneself to dream certain dreams. And now, after one hundred years of psychoanalysis, this fact has become very very apparent. Patients start dreaming according to the expectation of the analyst. If a patient goes to a Freudian, he dreams one kind of dream. If he goes to the Jungian, he starts dreaming another kind of dream. Now this is an accepted fact. How does it happen? Even un-consciously he is trying to be clever, cunning.

When you go to a Freudian, he is waiting for some sexual dream. Even if you don't dream it, he will impose an interpretation of sexuality on your dream. Your innocent dreams will be painted in such a way that they will look utterly sexual. For example, if you are flying in your dream, the Freudian will say, "This is nothing but sexuality - flying is a phallic symbol. You want to go high and high and high; you want to reach a climax of sex. It is pictorial. You want to reach to a peak. It simply represents a peak."

It may be so, it may not be so, but the analyst has imposed a certain pattern on your dream. Now, slowly slowly, you will start dreaming according to him, because every human being has a deep need to be approved. And when you really dream a Freudian dream, the analyst is so happy that

the patient also feels happy that he is doing something really great. Because of this, by and by he will dream more and more sexual dreams, remember more and more sexual dreams. May start editing dreams - and VERY unconsciously. May drop a few things, may add a few things. Will give it a color - a Freudian color.

After six months of psychoanalysis with a Freudian, ALL your dreams will be just sexuality and nothing else.

Go to a Jungian and things start changing. Now, flying is no more a sexual symbol - it is occult.

It is the desire of the human soul to reach to the ultimate. It is esoteric. Another interpretation is enforced, and soon you will have visions of Masters talking to you, pure voices descending upon you, great light, kundalini, lotuses opening within you... and things will start happening. And within six months you will be a perfect Jungian dreamer.

Go to the Adlerian, and the same dream, that you are flying, and the interpretation is different. The Adlerian says, "Flying high is nothing but an effort to become superior - man suffers from inferiority complexes. To be low is inferior; to fly high, above everybody else, is to be superior." Another interpretation is enforced on you.

People start dreaming the way they are expected to dream. So even dreaming is not so innocent as you think. The Master cannot depend on your dreaming either. He simply goes beyond ALL your layers; he looks through all the layers. He looks through all the chaos that you are. You are not in order, you are not a discipline. There are a thousand and one contradictions in you, so no one particular idea can be imposed on you.

The Master's work is not to impose any particular interpretation on you - he has none. He simply tries to see the whole chaos that you are, the whole contradiction that you are, the crowd, the mob, that you are, the so many small selves in you without any real center, the civil war that goes on within you. He goes on seeing it.

And if he feels that it will be helpful for you, then he can be deceived by you - but that is willed by him. You cannot deceive him on your own. There is no way. He has eyes! He is no more blind. He looks through and through. And, in fact, to deceive a Master is impossible, but even to deceive a man who has a little observation is difficult. If you just start a little observation, it will be impossible for anybody to deceive you. Just a LITTLE observation!

For example, a woman says to you, "I love you." Watch her eyes - if she really loves you, you will see her eyes changing, her eyes expanding, the black dot in the eye becoming bigger - immediately! if she really loves you. She is opening up. And this is not DONE by her: she is opening up in the eyes because she wants to drink more of you.

Just as eyes change: when you go into the sun the eyes become smaller, because too much sun is not needed to go in. When you come back to the home in the darkness, the pupils dilate, they become bigger; more light is needed to come in. When a woman says to a man, "I love you," if she is falsifying, if she is just trying to deceive the man, maybe is interested in his money or in something else, her eyes will not cooperate with her statement. And there is no way to will the cooperation of the eyes. Spon-taneously, if she loves you, pupils dilate, become bigger. She opens up. She wants you to be in.

Just watch people: they say one thing, and their face says another thing. They may be saying one thing with their mouth, and another thing with their hand gesture. Just a little observation and nobody can deceive you.

A Broadway agent returned home and found one of his biggest clients in the arms of his wife. "Stop sounding like a TV melodrama, Harry," the client told him, cutting short a tirade of denunciations.

"Let's treat this situation like adults. We both love your wife. All right, then, let's play one game of gin rummy - and the winner gets her."

The agent thought for a moment, then said, "Okay, but just to make it interesting, let's play for a dime a point on the side."

How long can you deceive? How can you deceive?

Danny was an inveterate bargain hunter. He hadn't a penny to his name, but whenever he saw a bargain he couldn't resist it.

One day a friend of his came to see him. Jim said, "Danny, I've got a terrific bargain for you. A boat-load has arrived for the Barnum and Bailey Circus and they have an overstock. They've got an elephant on board, a baby elephant, that's worth at least Danny looked at Jim as if he were half crazy. "What! An elephant! An elephant in my one-room apartment? You must be out of your mind! In the first place, there's no room for it. And in the second place, how could I feed it? In the third place, what could I do with it? Don't be nuts!"

"But," persisted Jim, "I'm telling you this elephant is worth two thousand bucks and I can get it for you for a mere three hundred, maybe even two hundred and fifty."

Danny was adamant. "Get the hell out of here, will you? You're off your rocker. I don't need an elephant. I don't want an elephant. Leave me alone with elephants."

But Jim knew his friend and he continued hammering away. "Listen, Danny," he said, "the fact is they have an overstock. You know, I think if I put it to them I could get you two elephants for the same two hundred bucks."

"Now you're talk in'," said Danny.

Your reality, your mind, is always there below your skin. It is just skin-deep - scratch it a little and the truth comes out.

You cannot deceive even a man who knows a little observation - how can you deceive a Master?

But if the Master feels it is good for you, it may be helpful for your growth, it may bring something up, it may take you through a breakthrough, then the Master is ready to do anything. Yes, he is ready even to be deceived by you.

The fourth question:

Question 4:

IN THE FIRST PLACE, RAGA, Dede would not have asked the question of me. He would have immediately recognized. He has already recognized - that's why he sends the greetings. He is a man of understanding, of great love and compassion.

But he asked you, not because he has any suspicions or doubts about me - he asked you just to see your response. He asked your not for an answer but for a response - and you missed. It is true there is no way to reply to it satisfactorily, but he was not asking for any reply from your side - he wanted a response.

You could have danced, and he would have understood. You could have hugged him, and he would have understood. A mad laughter would have been THE answer.

It is not a question of intellectual curiosity. He is not an intellectual man at all - he is a real Sufi.

He would have understood it. Sufis know how to understand the ways of lovers. You could have just looked into his eyes with great love. He was not asking anything about me: he was asking something about you. These are the ways of the Masters.

He apparently asked how you could know a true Master. In fact, he was asking, "Are you a true disciple?" You could have shown your disciple hood. You could have touched his feet. You could have cried in joy - or anything! Not ready-made, not manipulated by the mind, but spontaneous, on the spur of the moment... and he would have been immensely satisfied with you.

The fifth question:

Next time when you go to him, don't miss. If he asks again, this time DO something. And remember, I am saying DO something. A Sufi Master does not ask for an intellectually satisfying answer: he asks for something existential, an indication.

He was saying to you, "If you have found a true Master, what happened to you? Show me! Give me a hint! Has love arisen in you? Have you become capable of abandoning yourself in a dance? Have you become capable of seeing the beauty of existence? Has humbleness arisen in you? Have you become prayerful?..."

Question 5:

CHARANA, ASSAGIOLI HAS MOVED TO THE OTHER EXTREME in reaction to Sigmund Freud.

His vision is not balanced, cannot be. It is a reaction. Reactions are never balanced. And I say to you that he is far higher in his understanding than Sigmund Freud, but still the imbalance remains.

Sigmund Freud's whole process was just to make you aware of your deep-rooted problems. If you become aware of your deep-rooted problems, they dissolve - that is Freudian analysis. Nothing else is needed. One has to take a conscious note of one's unconscious problems. The moment consciousness penetrates the unconscious, a little light arises in the darkness of your being, problems start changing.

Freud was on the right track, but got stuck in the world of dreams. Never went deeper than that.

Let me remind you: wakefulness is the first state, dreaming the second state, sleep the third state, and TURIYA - samadhi - the fourth state. Sigmund Freud created a revolution just by changing the emphasis from the first state to the second. The whole psychoanalytical revolution consists in that.

Up to that point, the Western man particularly had lived with the idea that wakefulness is all. The dreams were never taken into account. The credit goes to Sigmund Freud that he expanded human consciousness. He brought dreams in. He moved into the darkness of the inner world. ONE step, but that one step is pregnant, very pregnant, very potential. But got stuck there.

It takes years of psychoanalysis to make you a little alert. That little alertness helps, but the process is too long. In the East, we have methods which can make you immensely alert within a VERY short period. Vipassana can do within months what psychoanalysis will do in years. And Vipassana works on the third, goes deeper than psychoanalysis. And when you work deeper, the problems that were very important before simply fade away. If dreaming becomes a conscious process, it will change your waking awareness. If in sleep you become conscious, it will change your dreaming awareness.

And there are ways to take the quantum leap from the third to the fourth. That is what is called satori, the quantum leap, when you become aware of the fourth. When you are simply aware, neither of waking nor of dreaming, nor of sleep - but just aware. There is no content to your awareness. This fourth state, TURIYA, is the highest point of consciousness. One who has achieved that, all his problems simply disappear. They need not be changed. There is nothing left to change. No other remedy is needed.

Freud is on the right track, but got hooked and became too much involved in the dreaming world.

And if you become too much involved in the dreaming world, the main goal is forgotten. You start moving sideways. And then there is no end to it. You can go ON analyzing and analyzing dreams for years and for lives... it will help, but the transformation is not going to be total ever. You can solve one thing here, another thing will arrive. You change something on one point, another point goes wrong. But the total situation remains the same.

Assagioli became aware of it and started thinking that just by being aware transformation is not going to happen - you have to will. He reacted to Sigmund Freud. He reacted on two points: one is analysis - he created a new philosophy he called 'psychosynthesis' - and on another point: just observation is not going to help, because he had seen that Freudian work takes you nowhere.... You change one thing, and another thing goes wrong, but the total remains the same. So he brought will into it, that one has to will. This is moving to the other extreme, because with the will ego enters in.

Will is nothing but an expression of the ego. And through will all kinds of repression... you will start repressing. What IS will? You choose this against that - what are you going to do with that which you are against? You will repress it. The pendulum moved back. Where it was before Freud, it went back again to the same situation.

Assagioli's insight is beautiful, that analysis is not enough - because analysis only dissects. And by dissecting, you destroy. And by dissecting, you can know only dead things, because in dissection they become dead. If you dissect a flower, how are you going to know the beauty of it? - it will disappear. If you dissect a child, it is dead. ALL dissection is post mortem. So whatsoever you come to through dissection will never give you any clue to life and life's mysteries. It may help you to understand matter, dead matter, but all that is alive disappears. For that, a more synthetic vision is needed.

Assagioli is right - about THIS point he is right. But about will he is absolutely wrong. If you will, of course you can change. That's what humanity has been doing in pre-Freudian days, for centuries. You have anger - will compassion, and repress anger. Then anger becomes repressed and compassion becomes cultivated. You have a beautiful personality, but not a beautiful soul. A polished personality, but deep inside is just hell-fire. You look very heavenly on the surface, but in your depth all that you have repressed goes on boiling within. It WILL explode. And it will go on poisoning your life in millions of ways.

Will is not the way. About that, Freud is far more right than Assagioli. The problem with Freud is he never went deeper than the dreaming. But I can understand: he was the pioneer in the West; pioneers cannot go very far. They only break the ice, they only begin. Much has to be done.

But the East has done the whole work. You will be surprised to know: one of the most perceptive Indians of this century, Ananda Coomaraswamy, claims that for one psychological term in English there are four psychological terms in Greek. And for one psychological term in Greek there are forty psychological terms in Sanskrit. For one English term you can find hundreds of psychological terms in Sanskrit, with subtle nuances and differences.

Five thousand years of work.... You may be aware that Eskimos have twelve words for ice - naturally, they live there. They have many many understandings about ice that nobody else has. No other language has twelve words for ice.

Psychology in the East has been the ancient most science. In fact, the only science the East has worked hard for. Our experience down the ages has been this: that awareness is the only remedy.

But it has to become more and more total.

When awareness is total, it transforms. NO other act is needed. Just to SEE a thing totally is to be free of it. To understand is to be transformed. If after understanding a thing something needs to be done, that will be only an indication that you have not understood it yet.

For example: if you really understand that anger is poison, not because I say, not because Buddha says, but you understand by your own observation, meditation, that anger is poison, that it poisons your being, then will you ask, "Now what to do to drop anger?" If you ask the question "What to do to drop anger?" that will simply show you have not yet understood. If you have really understood and seen that anger is poison, it is dropped. In that VERY understanding, it is dropped.

Awareness is transformation. No other discipline is needed.

Assagioli falls back again. In one point, he brings something beautiful: synthesis. But on another point, on another account, he falls back: he goes to the old repressive mind - will means repression.

I don't teach you will. It is because of will that you have become so miserable. It is because of will that you feel guilty. It is because of will that you go on carrying scorpions, snakes and crocodiles and all kinds of things inside you. You have lost all beauty and grace.

What is will? Will means struggle against the whole. The real man of understanding is absolute will- lessness. That's why Jesus says: THY KINGDOM COME, THY WILL BE DONE. How is Assagioli going to explain it? - THY WILL BE DONE.... Not mine! Because whatsoever is MY will is going to be against God's will. I have to efface my will completely. I have not to be. When I am in an absolute will-lessness, then God's will starts functioning.

And about synthesis too - Assagioli's idea of synthesis is more philosophical than existential. There are two possible kinds of synthesis. One: put together. Mahatma Gandhi did it in India. He tried to put Islam and Hinduism together. He tried to create a kind of synthesis. The motivation was political, so that Hindus and Mohammedans wouldn't fight. The motivation was not religious: it was political - so that India would remain undivided. It didn't work, because political motives can never work. They are dishonest, fundamentally insincere.

And how did he try to make the synthesis between Hinduism and Mohammedanism? Just a superficial synthesis: choose a few theories from the Bhagavad Gita and a few theories from the Koran, and try to show that they mean the same. It is very easy! But to contradict it, there are a thousand things in the Koran and a thousand things in the Gita which are against each other. Don't talk about them. Don't bring them in. Just bring those points which correspond.

This is a superficial synthesis.

There is another kind of synthesis - Ramakrishna did it. He practiced all religions, almost all that were available to him. For six months he became a Mohammedan. Just see the difference. What did Gandhi do? - he just looked into the Koran, looked into the Gita, tried to find some intellectual synthesis, and created a kind of synthetic philosophy. But it is not existential, it is in-tellectual. And the motivation is political.

What did Ramakrishna do? He achieved the ultimate samadhi through Hinduism. No man before him has ever done such a thing. And then he said, "Now I would like to follow the path of Islam."

His disciples were bewildered. They said, "For what? You have attained!"

He said, "Now I want to see whether I can attain from that path too or not. I have come to the peak of the mountain by one path. I will go down into the valley again, and I will start trekking on another path. I would like to see whether I can reach to the same peak."

It was one of the greatest endeavors in human history. Ramakrishna stands very alone in his effort, solitary. He became a Mohammedan. And when he became a Mohammedan, he stopped going

into Hindu temples - he was no more a Hindu! He started wearing Mohammedan clothes, started eating Mohammedan food. He had a Mohammedan cook to make food for him. Practiced Sufism for six months. Then the mosque was his place.

After six months he reached the peak. He declared to his disciples, "This path, too, leads to the same place. Now I will follow other paths.... "

He became a Buddhist , he became a Christian... and the strangest thing that he did, the most strange of all these paths was this. In Bengal there is a sect, Krishnaites, who believe in Krishna.

And one of their fundamental beliefs is that Krishna is the only male in existence, and everybody else is just a girlfriend to Krishna - all ARE GOPIS. All! Even men. There is only one man, the center, and all are the girlfriends dancing around him. So the follower of that path has to believe that he is a woman. He may be a man or a woman - that doesn't matter. This is one of the funda-mentals.

Ramakrishna followed that path for one year... he lived like a woman, in women's dotes. And the miracle was this, that within a few weeks he started walking like a woman - which is very difficult. It is really difficult, because it needs a totally different anatomy. It is not a question of just belief. The woman walks in a certain way because of the womb. The man cannot walk that way. Because of the womb inside the woman her physiology moves in a different way. But he started walking like a woman. People were puzzled.

Not only that: his voice changed - he started talking like a woman. Not only that: his breasts started growing. His disciples were very much worried. And not only that: the most miraculous thing that happened was that after six months he started menstruating. Regular period! It was unbelievable.

Doctors came and could not believe it was happening - regularly, every month.

He became a woman! And he attained through that path too.

This is existential synthesis. This is REAL synthesis. The Gandhian synthesis is hocus-pocus.

Utterly meaningless. This is real synthesis.

Assagioli has done something which is just intellectual.

What WE are doing here is real synthesis. And not only of all religions, but of all psychologies, all yogas, too. We are trying to move existentially into all the possibilities that any human being has ever moved. We can create here the greatest synthesis that has ever been created anywhere else.

But this synthesis is not intellectual: it is existential. We are living it. When I talk about Sufis, I am a Sufi. And when you listen to me about Sufis, those who really listen to me become Sufis. Then all else disappears. When we move in the world of Zen, we are PART of it! We are not alien and outsiders. When I am speaking on Zen Masters, I am not speaking from the outside. I am not a scholar, and you are not here like students. These are not discourses, these are communions.

When I talk about Zen Masters, I am one! And those who love me, and those who are intimate with me, those who are sannyasins, they become one with that approach. And in that oneness, understanding arises.

And we are moving through ALL kinds of climates, all kinds of paths. Slowly slowly, we will have on the earth not one Ramakrishna but thousands...

The sixth question:

Question 6:

LIFE IN ITSELF HAS NO MEANING. Life is an opportunity to create meaning. Meaning has not to be discovered: it has to be created. You will find meaning only if you create it. It is not lying there somewhere behind the bushes, so you can go and you search a little bit and find it. It is not there like a rock that you will find. It is a poetry to be composed, it is a song to be sung, it is a dance to be danced.

Meaning is a dance, not a rock. Meaning is music. You will find I only if you create it. Remember it.

Millions of people are living meaningless lives because of this utterly stupid idea that meaning has to be discovered. As if it is already there. All that you need is to just pull the curtain, and behold!

meaning is here. It is not like that.

So remember: Buddha finds the meaning because he creates it. I found it because I created it. God is not a thing but a creation. And only those who create find. And it is good that meaning is not lying there somewhere, otherwise one person would have discovered it - then what would be the need for everybody else to discover it?

Can't you see the difference between religious meaning and scientific meaning? Albert Einstein discovered the theory of relativity; now, do you have to discover it again and again? You will be foolish if you discover it again and again. What is the point? One man has done it; he has given you the map. It may have taken years for him, but for you to understand it will take hours. You can go to the university and learn.

Buddha also discovered something, Zarathustra also discovered something, but it is not like Albert Einstein's discovery. It is not there that you have just to follow Zarathustra and his map and you will find it. You will never find it. You will have to become a Zarathustra. See the difference!

To understand the theory of relativity, you need not become an Albert Einstein, no. You have to be just of average intelligence, that's all. If you are not too much retarded, you will understand it.

But to understand the meaning of Zarathustra, you will have to become a Zarathustra - less than that won't do. You will have to create it again. And each individual has to give birth to God, to meaning, to truth; each man has to become pregnant with it and pass through the pains of birth.

Each one has to carry it in one's womb, feed it by one's own blood, and only then does one discover.

Now, you ask me: WHY CAN'T I SEE ANY MEANING IN LIFE?

You must be waiting passively for the meaning to come... it will never come. This has been the idea of the past religions, that the meaning is ALREADY there. It is not! Freedom is there to create it, energy is there to create it. The field is there to sow the seeds and reap the crop. ALL IS THERE - but the meaning has to be created. That's why to create it is such a joy, such an adventure, such an ecstasy.

So the first thing: religion has to be creative. Up to now, religion has remained very passive, almost impotent. You don't expect a religious person to be creative. You just expect him to fast, sit in a cave, get up early in the morning, chant mantras... and this kind of stupid thing. And you are perfectly satisfied! What is he doing? And you praise him because he goes on long fasts. Maybe he is a masochist; maybe he enjoys torturing himself. He sits there when it is icy cold, naked, and you appreciate him. But what is the POINT, what is the value in it? All the animals of the world are naked in the icy cold - they are not saints. Or when it is hot, he sits in the hot sun, and you appreciate him.

You say, "Look! here is a great ascetic." But what is he doing? What is his contribution to the world?

What beauty has he added to the world? Has he changed the world a little bit? Has he made it a little more sweet, more fragrant? No, you don't ask that.

Now, I tell you, this has to be asked: Praise a man because he has created a song. Praise a man because he has created a beautiful sculpture. Praise a man because he plays such a beautiful flute.

Let these be religious qualities from now onwards. Praise a man because he is such a lover - love is religion. Praise a man: because of him the world is becoming more graceful.

Forget all these stupid things! - fasting and just sitting in a cave, torturing oneself or Lying down on a bed of nails. Praise a man because he has cultivated beautiful roses. The world is more colorful because of him. And then you will find meaning.

Meaning comes out of creativity. Religion has to become more poetic, more aesthetic.

And second thing: sometimes it happens that you search for the meaning because you have already concluded. Out of a conclusion you search for it. You have already decided what meaning should be there, or has to be there... and then you don't find it.

The inquiry has to be pure. What do I mean when I say the inquiry has to be pure? It should be without any conclusion. It should not have any A PRIORI in it.

You ask: WHY CAN'T I FIND MEANING IN LIFE?

What meaning are you looking for? You must be looking for a certain meaning. You will not find it - because from the very beginning your inquiry is polluted, your inquiry is impure. You have already decided.

For example, if a man comes into my garden and thinks if he can find a diamond there then this garden is beautiful, and he cannot find the diamond, so he says there is no meaning in the garden....

And there are so many beautiful flowers, and so many birds singing, and so many colors, and the wind blowing through the pines, and the moss on the rocks. But he cannot see any meaning because he has a certain idea: he has to find the diamond, a Kohinoor - only then will there be meaning.

He is missing meaning because of his idea. Let your inquiry be pure. Don't move with any fixed idea. Go naked and nude. Go open and empty. And you will find not only one meaning - you will find a thousand and one meanings. Then each thing will become meaningful. Just a colored stone shining in the rays of the sun... or a dewdrop creating a small rainbow around itself... or just a small flower dancing in the wind.... What meaning are you searching for?

Don't start with a conclusion, otherwise you have started wrongly from the very beginning. Go without a conclusion! That's what I mean when I say again and again: Go without knowledge if you want to find truth. The knowledgeable person never finds it. His knowledge is a barrier.

Goldstein had never been to a show in the legitimate theater. For his birthday, his children decided to give him a present of a ticket for the Jewish theater.

The night after the show, they came to visit him and asked him eagerly what he thought of the show.

"Ash," he answered, "it was simply nonsense. When she was willing, he wasn't willing. And when he was willing, she wasn't willing. And when they both were willing, down came the curtain!"

Now, if you have a fixed idea, then you are only looking for it, only looking for it.... And because of this narrowness of the mind, all that is available is missed.

Meaning has to be created. And meaning has to be searched for without any conclusions. If you can drop your knowledge, life will suddenly take on color, it will become psychedelic. But you are continuously carrying the load of your scriptures, books, theories, doctrines, philosophies... you are lost in all that. And everything has become mixed, hotchpotch. And you cannot even remember what is what.

Your mind is a mess. Clean it! Make it a blank. The empty mind is the best mind. And those who have been telling you that the empty mind is the Devil's workshop are the Devil's agents. The empty mind is closer to God than anything. The empty mind is not the Devil's workshop. The Devil cannot do without thoughts.

With emptiness the Devil cannot do anything at all. He has no way Into emptiness.

So many thoughts in the mind, mixed up; nothing seems to be clear; you have heard so many things from so many sources - your mind is a monster. And you are trying to remember, and you have been told to remember: Don't forget! And, naturally, the burden is so much that you cannot remember.

Many things you have forgotten. Many things you have imagined and added on your own.

An Englishman visiting America attended a banquet and heard the Master of Ceremonies give the following toast:

"Here's to the happiest moment of my life, Spent in the arms of another man's wife - my mother."

"By Jove, that's ripping," the Englishman thought to himself. "I must remember to use it back home."

Some weeks later when he returned to England, he attended a church luncheon and was asked to give a toast. In thunderous tones he addressed the crowded room:

"Here's to the happiest moment of my life, Spent in the arms of another man's wife..."

After a long pause the crowd began to grow restless, glaring at the speaker indignantly. The speaker's friend sitting next to him whispered, "You had better explain yourself quickly."

"By Jove," the speaker blurted out, "you will have to excuse me. I forgot the name of the bloomin' woman."

That is happening. You remember this - Plato has said this. And you remember that - Lao Tzu has said that. And you remember what Jesus has said, and what Mohammed has said... and you remember many things. And they have all got mixed up. And you have not said a single thing on your own. Unless you say something on your own, you will miss the meaning.

Drop the knowledge and become more creative. Remember, knowledge is gathered - you need not be creative about it; you have only to be receptive. And that's what man has become: man is reduced to being a spectator. He reads the newspapers, he reads the Bible and the Koran and the Gita; he goes to the movie, sits there and sees the movie; he goes to the football match, or sits before his TV, listens to the radio... and so on and so forth. Twenty-four hours a day he is just in a kind of inactivity, a spectator. Others are doing things, and he is simply watching. You will not find meaning by watching.

You can see a thousand and one lovers making love and you will not know what love is - you will not know that orgasmic abandonment by watching. You will have to become a participant. Meaning comes through participation. Participate in life! Participate as deeply, as totally, as possible. Risk all for participation. If you want to know what dance is, don't go and see a dancer - learn dancing, be a dancer. If you want to know anything, participate! That is the true and the right way, the authentic way, to know a thing. And there will be great meaning in your life. And not only one-dimensional - multi-dimensional meanings. You will be showered by meanings.

And life has to be multi-dimensional, then only is there meaning. Never make life one-dimensional.

That too is a problem.

Somebody becomes an engineer, and then he thinks all is finished. He becomes identified with being an engineer. Then his whole life he is just an engineer. And there were millions of things available. But he moves only on one track, becomes bored. Is fed up. Is tired, wearied. Goes on dragging. Waits only for death. What meaning can there be?

Have more interests in life. Don't be always a businessman. Sometimes play too. Don't be just a doctor or an engineer, or a headmaster, or a professor - be as many things as possible! Play cards, play the violin, sing a song, be an amateur photographer, a poet.... Find as many things as possible in life, and then you will have richness. And meaning is a by-product of richness.

I have heard a very meaningful story about Socrates:

Socrates, while awaiting death in prison, was haunted by a dream that kept urging him, "Socrates, make music!" The old man felt he had always served art with his philosophizing. But now, spurred on by that mysterious voice, he turned fables into verse, indited a hymn to Apollo, and played the flute.

In the face of death, philosophy and music briefly went hand in hand, and Socrates was as blissful as never before.

He had never played on the flute. Something inside him persisted, "Socrates, make music!" Just in the face of death! It looked so ridiculous. And he had never played, he had never made music.

A part of his being had remained suffocated. Yes, even a man like Socrates, had remained one- dimensional. The denied part insisted, "Enough of logic - a little music will be good, will bring balance. Enough of argumentation - play on the flute." And the voice was SO persistent that he had to yield to it.

His disciples must have been puzzled: "Has he gone mad? Socrates playing on the flute?" But to me it is very significant. The music could not have been very great, because he had never played.

Absolutely amateurish, childish it must have been - but still something was satisfied, something was bridged. He was no more one-sided. For the first time in his life, maybe, he was spontaneous. For the first time he had done something for which he could not supply any reason. Otherwise, he was a rational man.

Just the other night I was reading a story about the great Hassidic mystic, Baal Shem:

It was a holiday, and the Hassidim had gathered to pray and to have a communion - sat sang - with the Master.

A man had come with his retarded child. He was a little worried about the child, the boy. He may do something, so he was keeping an eye on the boy. When the prayers were said, the boy asked his father, "I have got a whistle - can I play on it?"

The father said, "Absolutely no - where is your whistle," because he was afraid. He may not even listen to his 'no'. He showed the whistle and the father kept his hand on his pocket, the boy's pocket. Then there was dancing, and the father forgot and he also started dancing. And Hassids are dancers, joyous people - the cream of Judaism, the very essence of Judaism is with them, with those mad people.

When everybody was praying to God and dancing, suddenly the boy could not resist any more. He took out his whistle and blew on it. Everybody was shocked! But Baal Shem came, hugged the boy, and said, "Our prayers are heard. Without this whistle, all was futile - because THIS was the only spontaneous thing here. All else was ritual."

Don't allow your life to become just a dead ritual. Let there be moments, unexplainable. Let there be a few things which are mysterious, for which you cannot supply any reason. Let there be a few doings for which people will think you are a little crazy. A man who is a hundred percent sane is dead. A little bit of craziness by the side is always a great joy. Go on doing a few crazy things too.

And then meaning will be possible.

The last question:

Question 7:

THERE IS NO SELF. Self is another name for the ego. And what do you mean by 'self-respect'?

There is a quality of consciousness - it can be called 'reverence' - but it is always unaddressed. It is not for the self, not for the other. It is simply reverence for life.

When it is addressed it is just a rationalization. And man is clever at finding beautiful words for ugly things. We can always hide our wounds and put flowers on them. And that's what you are doing - and you are also aware of it. That's why you ask: AM I WRONG? You know you ARE wrong.

And I am not saying don't respect life - be full of respect for ALL life. Your life is included in it! You are not excluded from it. But it has to be reverence for all life. When it is only for the self, then what is it for the other?

And what exactly is this self?Just another name for the ego - ego is not anything else. The idea of I... and the idea is false, because whenever you go in it is never found there. Nobody has ever found any self. Just go and see... you will not find it.

Bodhidharma was asked by Emperor Wu, "I am very much disturbed by my ego, by this self. And I have tried everything, but I cannot get rid of it. Help me!"

Bodhidharma said, "Come early in the mowing tomorrow, three o'clock in the morning. And come alone, and don't forget to bring your self with you - and I will finish it forever."

The emperor was afraid. This man looked mad. "How can anybody finish the self? And what does he mean when he says, 'Don't forget to bring it'?"

The whole night he could not sleep, tossed and turned. Many times he decided not to go, and he had said, "Come alone" - and he was a very dangerous looking man. In China he was known as the Barbarian Buddha. He had very dangerous eyes. If he looked into your eyes, then for months you would not be able to sleep. And he looked murderous - and he WAS a murderer. He murdered many disciples. Many people became enlightened through him. And he was really a hard taskmaster.

Three o'clock, in the dark, alone, to be with this man... and one never knows - he was unpredictable.

When he had entered China, he had come with one shoe on one foot, the other shoe on his head.

The emperor was puzzled and he said, "What are you doing?"

He said, "I am trying to show you - this is the way I am. Just to give you a taste of what type of man I am, so you know from the very beginning with whom you are dealing."

Now, to go to this man in his mountain cave in the dark.... M any times he decided not to go, but the attraction was also great - because this man was no ordinary man. Yes, on the surface he looked very hard, but deep down there was the kindest heart possible. He was all compassion. Even if he was hard, it was because of his compassion.

Finally, he had to go. And the moment he reached in front of Bodhidharma... he was sitting there with his staff, and he said, "You have come?.Where is your ego? Where is your self? Have you brought it with you? I am going to finish it forever."

The emperor said, "What are you talking about? Is the self a thing that I can bring with me?"

Bodhidharma said, "Then what is it?"

The emperor said, "Of course, it is something inside."

Bodhidharma said, "Okay, inside or outside, it makes no difference. My staff can reach anywhere!

You just sit in front of me, close your eyes, and try to find it. And the moment you have found it, just tell me that 'I have found,' and I will kill it."

Shaking and trembling, the emperor sat before Bodhidharma. Hours passed. The sun started rising.

He looked and looked... he had to look! because this man was sitting there with his staff. He could hit hard. And by the morning when the sun was rising, he was totally a different man. Bodhidharma said, "Now you can open your eyes. Where is it? For three hours you have been looking."

We touched Bodhidharma's feet and said, "I cannot find it. I looked hard - I have never looked so hard. Your presence made me look HARD. I SEARCHED with all my energy possible. I was not holding anything back, but I did not find it."

And Bodhidharma laughed and he said, "So you see? I have finished it forever."

It is not! When you don't look it is. When you look, it is not. Go in... and you will not find any ego, any self, anything. What you will find is eternal, infinite life, and then there is really respect for it. But it has nothing to do with you or me - it is reverence for life.

Albert Schweitzer used to use this term, 'reverence for life'. It is synonymous with religion. But, please, don't get into rationalizations.

Harry Robinson had just entered the parlour of a familiar bagnio when, to his utter shock, he spotted his own father coming down the stairs. Harry reeled back in surprise. "Dad!" he cried out. "What in God's name are you doing in a place like this?"

Cold Robinson was equally stunned, but quickly recovered. "Now son," he said, nonchalantly brushing off his suit, "for twenty lousy bucks, would you want me to bother your dear, hard-working mother?"

People can always find rationalizations for ANYTHING and everything.

A Jewish mental patient was causing quite a stir in the institution because he wouldn't eat the food.

"I'm kosher!" shouted Moskowitz. "I won't eat this food. I want kosher meals!" So the staff hired a Jewish woman from the community to cook special kosher meals for Moskowitz. Everybody was envious, for Moskowitz's meals were much better than theirs.

Friday night rolled around, and Moskowitz pushed back his chair after a delicious chicken dinner, and lit up a big cigar. This was too much for the director, who called Moskowitz into his office.

"Now, see here, Moskowitz. You're getting away with murder. You get the best meals because you claim you only eat kosher food. And now, on Friday night, on your Sabbath, you flout your religion and smoke a cigar!"

Moskowitz merely shrugged his shoulders. "Why are you arguing with me?" he said. "I'm crazy, ain't I?"

Remember, the mind is very cunning. It can always find rationalizations. It can call ego 'self', 'soul'.

It can call egoistic attitudes self-respect, and hide itself behind those words.

You have to be hard. You have to expose your mind to the very roots. only then is there a possibility of your being exploding in bloom. The mind has to be dropped, and it is dropped only when it is exposed. It is a cheat, it is a fraud.