Come out and I'll Show You

THOMAS SAID TO THEM: IF I TELL YOU ONE OF THE WORDS HE SAID TO ME, YOU WILL TAKE UP STONES AND THROW AT ME; AND FIRE WILL COME FROM THE STONES AND BURN YOU UP.

Whenever there is a man like Jesus or Buddha, you try to escape from him in every possible way because he is just like a death to you. Of course, you will rationalize your escape, you will find clever reasons why you are escaping. You will argue in your mind, "That man is not a Christ, that man is not yet enlightened." You will find something wrong in that man, so that you can feel at ease. You will avoid that man. It is dangerous to encounter him because he can live, he can see through you; you become transparent to him. You cannot hide yourself from him, you cannot hide the falseness that you are - before him, you are just like an open book.

And your whole life you have been hiding. Your whole life you have been trying to live a false, inauthentic life; you have been living in lies, and he will see through you. Before him you will become a trembling leaf; before him you will be reduced to your truth; before him you cannot manage your false image - he will be a catastrophe. So only those who are very courageous can come near to a Jesus. The greatest courage is needed to come near a man like Jesus. That means you are ready to take the jump into the abyss, you are ready to lose yourself.

To move with Jesus in the insecurity of the unknown, in the uncharted, in the ocean where the other shore is not visible, tremendous courage is needed. And this is the problem: very few will follow Jesus. Those who escape, they will miss him, and they will miss the very meaning of their own lives, because deep down, when you try to escape Jesus, you are trying to escape from your own truth.

He is nothing but your future - you are a seed, he is the tree; he has come to bloom, he is your future, he is your possibility. Escaping from him, you are escaping from your own ultimate possibility.

But those who come near, it is not certain that they will encounter Jesus just by coming near. Those who escape, they have escaped - finished! But those who come near, live near, even living near they can avoid Jesus, because they can be near him for the wrong reasons. So, out of thousands, few will choose him. And those few who choose him, they will not all be with him for the right reasons.

And those who are with him for the wrong reasons will also miss him.

You can be with an enlightened person for the wrong reasons. Look for the reasons why you seek:

why do you go to a master? What are your real reasons? Are you seeking truth? Rarely is a man seeking truth. You may be seeking happiness, but not truth. Happiness happens when truth is achieved. But if you are seeking happiness you cannot achieve truth, because happiness is a byproduct; you cannot achieve it directly, there is no way to it - it comes via truth. If you reach the true, happiness will happen; it is a shadow, it comes with the truth. But if you seek happiness, then happiness is not possible and truth is missed.

Out of one hundred seekers, ninety-nine are for happiness. They have suffered - life has been a misery, much pain: they are seeking the antidote, they are seeking the opposite. To be with a Jesus or a Buddha in search of happiness is to miss him again, because your eyes are closed. Happiness can never be the goal; it is achieved, it comes automatically, you need not bother about it. It is always a byproduct: you simply take care of the tree, and flowers come. You need not go directly to the flowers - if you do, you will miss. If you are after flowers you will miss; but if you take care of the tree, flowers come in their own time. You need not worry, you need not even think about them.

In your ordinary existence also this is known, but you never make it a deep experience. Whenever you are happy.... You have been happy for a few moments; it is difficult to find a man who has not been happy even for a few moments - because if you have never been happy for a few moments, if you have never tasted happiness, then you cannot seek it. Then why would you search for happiness? Without having tasted it, how could you make it a goal? You have tasted it. It was momentary, a glimpse - and then again darkness; a glimpse - and then again anguish. The morning comes only for a moment, and then midnight again. You have tasted it, but you have not entered into it. How does it happen? Try to enter into it.

Whenever you feel happy, you were not looking for it. That is the first basic thing about happiness:

it happened when you were looking for something else. For example, you have heard the story of Archimedes: he was in search of a scientific truth. He worked, experimented, thought, pondered over it many days and nights. He forgot himself. Then suddenly, when he was in his bath one day, lying down in his tub, it happened, it bubbled up - he realized. He was naked, but he forgot that he was naked. When you are happy you forget yourself; if you cannot forget yourself you are not happy.

Happiness means you are no longer there; it happens only when you are not.

The problem was solved, the whole tension relaxed. Archimedes ran into the street shouting, "Eureka, Eureka! I have found it, I have found it!" People thought he had gone mad. They had always been suspicious of this man, this Archimedes, and now their suspicion was proved right.

"Too much thinking is bad" - they had always been of this opinion, and this man was thinking too much. Now he had gone mad and was crying, "Eureka!" on the street - "I have found it!"

What happened? How ecstatic he was in that moment! And it was not the ultimate truth, it was just an ordinary problem. Now it is ordinary - once discovered, scientific truths become ordinary, common. But he discovered it. In that moment of discovery, all tension relaxed, and he was so happy, so ecstatic, that he forgot himself. Whenever you are happy, the first basic thing is to remember that you were searching for something else, not for happiness. If you search for happiness directly, you will miss it forever and forever. It is a byproduct: you are engaged in search of something else, and then that something else is discovered. The discovery makes you so fulfilled, the whole effort relaxes, the whole tension goes; you are at ease, at peace, at rest, and you feel filled with happiness. Happiness is a byproduct.

The second thing to remember: if you seek after it, how can you lose yourself? The seeker can never lose himself; the ego remains, you remain a point of reference. Whenever happiness happens, you are not there. Remember moments of happiness: you were not there. It may have happened in a deep love, it may have happened in a discovery, or it may have happened just when you were playing cards, but you became so lost... suddenly the upsurge! Anything can trigger it, but a direct search is dangerous because you will miss it.

If you come to a master in search of happiness, you are near him for the wrong reasons. Then you remain hidden in your wrong reason. You remain close physically, spiritually there is much distance.

Your eyes are blind, you will not be able to know this man, Jesus or Buddha. It is impossible, because your eyes are filled with the wrong goals.

Or you may not even be in search of happiness, there are even lower goals. You may be near a master to attain power, you may be near him to attain some siddhi, you may be near him to attain a more egoistic state; then you will miss him completely. There are even lower aims. And the lower the aim, the more possibility there is of missing because then you are more blind. You may be near him just for very ordinary reasons like seeking health. You are ill and Jesus will cure you: or you are poor and Jesus will give you money - his blessings will become money to you; or you don't have a child and he can give you a child.

The lower the aim, the more you will miss, because the lower the aim, the more you are in the deep valley - and Jesus exists on the top of the hill: the distance goes on becoming more and more.

Many have escaped, but those who have come near, not all of them have come near either - only one who comes for the right reason. And that right reason is truth. But why do you never seek it?

Truth seems to be so bare, truth seems to be so dry, there seems to be no urge to seek it. Happiness seems worthwhile, and if I insist, "Seek truth and happiness will be the byproduct," you may even agree to seek the truth, because the byproduct, happiness, will be there. But you are still seeking happiness. If you come to know that to seek happiness, truth has to be sought, you may start seeking truth - but you are not seeking truth, your mind remains focused on happiness. That focusing is wrong.

Only when you are a truth-seeker do you come near Jesus, Buddha, Zarathustra; otherwise you never come near. For any other reason you are near physically; spiritually, you are very, very far away - vast spaces exist.

Now look at this saying of Jesus:

JESUS SAID TO HIS DISCIPLES: MAKE A COMPARISON TO ME AND TELL ME WHOM I AM LIKE.

Why has Jesus asked this question? Is he not aware who he is? Is it to be known through the disciples who he is? Why does he want to know through the disciples who he is? - because whatsoever they say will show why they are near Jesus. You create the image of your master according to your desire. If you are near Jesus because you are ill, Jesus will be the healer. You look through your desire, you project your desire. If you are there to seek power, then Jesus is the omnipotent, the most powerful, because only when he is the most powerful can he give it to you. If you are seeking immortality, if you are seeking a state of deathlessness, if you are afraid of death, then the image of Jesus will reflect your search.

Why did Jesus ask his disciples, "Tell me who I am"? He asked just to know what they are projecting.

If you project anything you will miss, because to know Jesus or Buddha, nonprojecting eyes are needed. You should not project anything, you should simply look at the fact. Jesus is a fact, the most vital fact that is possible in the world. Look at him directly, immediately. Don't bring your desire in between. Don't make a screen of Jesus; otherwise, you will see but you will see your own desire reflected.

JESUS SAID TO HIS DISCIPLES: MAKE A COMPARISON TO ME AND TELL ME WHOM I AM LIKE.

SIMON PETER SAID TO HIM: THOU ART LIKE A RIGHTEOUS ANGEL.

This man must have been a moralist, a puritan. This man must have been guilty of his immorality, because whatsoever you say about others never shows anything about others, it simply shows something about you. Whatsoever you judge is not a judgment about others, it is a judgment about you.

Jesus says again and again, "Judge ye not!" because all your judgments are going to be wrong - you will be there. A thief is a sinner for you. Why? - because you are so attached to your private property. It doesn't show anything about the thief, it simply shows your possessiveness.

I have heard that one Englishman died and he reached hell. The Devil asked him, "Which hell would you prefer?... because we have all sorts of hells here: the English, the German, the Chinese, the Russian, the Indian...."

The Englishman said, "The Indian of course!"

The Devil was puzzled. He said, "You look like an Englishman, so why do you choose the Indian?

He said, "I am an Englishman, but I have been in India and I know well that in the Indian hell the heating won't work!"

Your mind accumulates experience. Whatsoever you say about hell or heaven or other persons, it is your experience speaking; it is you reflected in each word you assert.

This Simon Peter said: THOU ART LIKE A RIGHTEOUS ANGEL.

Two things he is saying: first, 'righteous' - he must have always been afraid of wrong, he must have been afraid of sin, he must have been afraid of being immoral. The opposite he projects on Jesus - that's why he is with Jesus.

Remember one thing: opposites attract each other. If you are a man, you are attracted to a woman - and that is the trouble! Because she is the opposite, that's why she is attractive. But to live with a woman will be difficult, because she is the opposite. This is how the misery of marriage arises: it begins in the attraction for the opposite, but when you have to live with the opposite, then there is trouble because in every way she is opposite. Her logic is totally different from yours. A man never comes to understand a woman. It is impossible to understand her, because a man thinks like a man and a woman thinks like a woman; they have different dimensions. A woman is more intuitive; she is not logical, she jumps to conclusions - and almost always she is right! That makes more trouble.

She cannot convince you; she cannot convince you whatsoever she says, because she has no logic about it. But she has insight, she looks immediately.

Once, Mulla Nasruddin was caught in a legal case. He looked in the court: twelve woman jurists.

And he said to the judge, "I confess! ... Because I cannot deceive one woman at home, so twelve in the jury - impossible! I have committed this sin, simply give me the punishment."

Every husband knows it is difficult to deceive a woman. Howsoever you plan, everything goes wrong the moment you reach home. The wife simply catches you, she hits exactly right at the wound. She is not aware either how she functions; her functioning is different.

A woman can never understand a man. This is also the reason why they attract each other, because only mysteries attract. But to live with someone you cannot understand is bound to create trouble, then there is going to be fighting. So wherever there is love continuous fighting happens, each moment a fight.

The opposite attracts: if you are a greedy person, you will be attracted by a man who has renounced; you will go to a saint who has renounced all if you are a greedy person. This is very difficult because this creates many troubles.

Look at the Jainas in India: they are the most rich - and riches don't come without greed, you have to be greedy - but they worship saints who have renounced all. They will not allow their saints to even wear clothes. No, that too is not allowed. The authentic DIGAMBER Jaina saint remains naked with no possessions, not even clothes. He possesses only his body, that's all. He has to take his food in his hands; he is not allowed to take food twice, once is enough. He sleeps on the ground, and that's why he is called digamber: the sky is his only covering, the sky is his only house, his only roof. But why this phenomenon? Why does this happen?

Mohammed talked about peace: the word islam means peace. But look at Mohammedans - they have been the most violent people on earth. Why were they attracted to Mohammed and to the religion of peace? The opposite attracts. The opposite is always attractive because this is the basic pattern of sex, and this basic pattern of sex follows you everywhere, whatsoever you do.

This Simon Peter said to Jesus: THOU ART LIKE A RIGHTEOUS ANGEL. This man must have been guilty about his immorality - rightly or wrongly, but he was guilty. He was attracted to Jesus because Jesus looked like an angel: pure, innocent, he had never committed a sin. That's why Christians go on insisting that he was born of a virgin mother, which is absurd! Why do they insist that he was born of a virgin mother? - because sex looks immoral. And if you are born out of immorality, how can you become absolutely moral? Impossible! If the very source is poisoned then how will you be moral? You can try but you can never be perfect. The immorality should be cut at the very source. Hence their insistence that Jesus was born of a virgin mother.

Nobody is born of a virgin mother - it is absolutely wrong, it cannot happen! But they insist, they depend on it. If it is proved finally that Jesus had a father, then Christians will desert him, they will immediately escape: "This man is just like us! We are immoral, we are born in sin, and if he is also born in sin then what is the difference?"

THOU ART LIKE A RIGHTEOUS ANGEL.

Angels are just symbols of absolute perfection, purity, innocence. This shows something about Simon Peter. And Simon Peter became the rock of the whole Christian church, he became the base. Hence, the Christian church is continuously involved with what is moral, what is immoral. The whole church has become a morality, not a religion. This Simon Peter is the root cause: he created guilt, because whenever you are too concerned with what is wrong, what is right, you become guilty - because life knows neither.

Life is absolutely amoral. It is neither moral nor immoral, it is amoral. It knows nothing of what is wrong and what is right. It moves in both directions, it is both together. A river in flood - what will you call it, moral or immoral? Thousands of villagers are drowned, hundreds of people dead, thousands homeless. What will you call this river in flood - bad? No, you will not use that word, because you know the river does not know what is good, what is bad. And God exists in the river as much as in you. A tree falls down where a saint is meditating, he is killed. What will you call this tree - a sinner, a murderer? Will this tree have to be forced to appear in a court? No, you will simply say, "This is a tree. Our morality - sin or non-sin - doesn't apply to this tree."

Morality is man-created, God seems to be amoral. The whole of existence is amoral. Amoral means neither - or both. But if you go to Jesus with a moralistic attitude you will miss him. Saint Peter, this Simon Peter, missed Jesus completely. He was in search of a moral man; he was in search of a saint, not in search of a sage.

And this is the difference between a saint and a sage: a sage is as amoral as life, he has become one with life, he doesn't think in terms of opposites; a saint has chosen the right, denied the wrong; he is half-alive, he has not taken the whole of life. A saint is really not religious, because a religious man will accept life as it is. He will not deny, because whatsoever you deny is a denial of God. Then you try to prove that you are better than God. Look: God creates sex - otherwise, who will create it? - and you deny it. Then you can become a saint but your sainthood will be just moral, it cannot be religious.

Hindus understood it very well. If you go back to the days of the Vedas, the rishis used to live a very ordinary life: they had wives, children; they were householders, they had not renounced.

Renunciation entered with Jainas and Buddhists. Otherwise, Hindu rishis always lived in a very ordinary way, because they knew, they came to know that life has to be accepted in its totality; nothing has to be denied, everything has to be accepted. This is what theism will really mean:

astika means one who says yes to the whole of life, he is not a no-sayer. This Saint Peter can become a good priest, he can become a saint, but he cannot become a sage. He has his own conceptions, that's why he has come to Jesus.

When you are filled with too many moral concepts, what do you do? You condemn yourself, because there are things that are not dissolved just by saying they are wrong; they remain. This man will become attracted to women; they are beautiful, and the desire exists - it is a gift of God. It is deep in your every pore, every cell of your body. Scientists say there are seventy million cells in the body, and each cell is a sexual being. Your whole body is a sex phenomenon! Whatsoever you do - you can close your eyes, you can escape to the Himalayas, but beauty will always attract you.

A flower looks so beautiful - have you observed? That too is sexual. A bird singing in the morning near a saint's cottage or hermitage looks beautiful, but have you observed that this singing of the bird is a sexual invitation? He is inviting the partner, seeking the partner, the lover. What is a flower?

A flower is a sexual phenomenon, a flower is just a trick; because the tree cannot move, its sexual cells have to be carried by bees, butterflies and others to other trees. Remember, there are female trees and male trees, and they cannot move because they are rooted in the earth. The flower is a trick to attract the bees, butterflies, other insects: they will come on the flower, and with the bees the sexual seed will go; then they will go to the female plant and that seed will fall there.

Wherever there is beauty there is sex. The whole of life is a sexual phenomenon. What can you do?

You can reject it, that is in your hands, but when you reject you feel guilt, because deep down the suppressed remains. You continuously feel guilty; something is wrong. You cannot be happy with guilt, remember, you cannot dance with guilt. Guilt will paralyze you: wherever you go, you cannot laugh, you cannot move in ecstasy, because you will always be afraid of the suppressed.

If you dance, sing, if you feel blissful, what will happen to the suppressed? It may come up, so you have to be constantly on watch. You become a watchman, not a master of your life, not an enjoyer of your life; you become just a watchman. And the whole thing becomes ugly because there is conflict, continuous conflict. Your energy is dissipated in inner struggle. And this type of man, who has suppressed his own being somehow, will always look at others with condemning eyes - it is bound to be so.

A moralist is very difficult to live with, because his eyes are continuously condemning you: you are wrong because you have taken tea. Are you drinking tea? Then you are thrown into hell - you cannot drink tea. Really, anything that can give you any enjoyment.... In Gandhi's ashram, you were not allowed to taste food - aswad, tastelessness, was the principle to be followed; you could eat, but you should not taste.

Why? Why be against taste? - because taste is enjoyment, and saints are against enjoyment. You cannot find a saint laughing or smiling - impossible. He looks sad, always condemning himself and others. His whole life is ill, he cannot be happy.

This Simon Peter is symbolic. He said: THOU ART LIKE A RIGHTEOUS ANGEL. He is saying, "I have come to you because you are pure: born of a virgin mother, never married, never enjoyed life, never lived. You are pure, so I see you as an angel."

MATTHEW SAID TO HIM: THOU ART LIKE A WISE MAN OF UNDERSTANDING.

This Matthew is not in search of morality, this Matthew is in search of knowledge - more scientific.

And Jesus looks like a man of understanding, he thinks he can get some clues about the mystery of life from this man: "This man carries some keys. He knows, I can gather information from him."

Matthew is in search of knowledge.

But when you come to Jesus or a man like Jesus, don't come in search of knowledge. Jesus looks a wise man, because whatsoever he says hits directly, whatsoever he says sounds true. Whatsoever he says is very meaningful, but you are paying too much attention to his words and not to his being.

This Matthew is a pundit, a scholar; he is in search of principles, theories, systems, philosophies. If you come to Jesus with such a mind you will miss him, because Jesus is not a man of knowledge - he is a man of being. And what is the difference?

Knowledge is superficial, borrowed, dead. This man is alive, absolutely alive! This man has not borrowed anything from anybody - he has come to realize himself. He can share his being with you, and you are foolish if you just carry words from him. These words can be carried from books, there was no need to come to Jesus. A library would have been better; there is more knowledge in a library, accumulated for centuries.

You come to this man where your being could have quenched its thirst and you simply carry away words. You come to an emperor and he is saying, "Ask, and it shall be given to you," and you ask only for one piece of bread and go away happy. The whole empire was at your feet, just for the asking - you carry words, you learn theories, you become a theologian. This Matthew is the root theologian for Christians.

And then the whole church got entangled in two things - that's why these two are mentioned. Peter became the base of church morality, antisexuality, and he continues to be the base; and Matthew became the base of theology, and he continues to be the base. Christianity is involved with two things, not with Christ at all: with morality - what is wrong and what is right, and with theology, theories about God. Theology means theories about God - and there can be no theory about God.

God is not a theory, it is not a hypothesis which has to be proved or can be disproved; you cannot argue about it. And when Jesus was there, you could have encountered God. God was there, he had penetrated this man - but a search for knowledge is a barrier. You should not ask Jesus for knowledge, you should ask for being. But to gather knowledge is easy, because you need not transform yourself. You simply listen to the words and gather them; no transformation is required on your part. But if you ask for being, then you have to be silent, then you have to be in deep meditation, then you have to become just a silence, a presence. Only then can Jesus pour his being into you.

This Matthew said to him: THOU ART LIKE A WISE MAN OF UNDERSTANDING.

Jesus is not a wise man. He is wisdom itself, but not a wise man - because you can be wise without becoming enlightened There are wise men: Confucius was a wise man, but not enlightened. Manu was a wise man, but not enlightened. Buddha was enlightened, Lao Tzu was enlightened: their wisdom comes from a totally different source. They have reached the very center of life - they have known. Their knowledge is not through intellect, their knowledge is through being. That's why I will call Jesus a man of being, not a man of knowledge.

Wisdom you can gather through experience - any old man becomes wise. Even a foolish man becomes wise, because they say if you persist in your foolishness you will become wise. Just time can give you wisdom; just living through life, committing the mistakes, going astray, coming back; many experiences gathered, you become wise.

Jesus is not wise in that way: he was not an old man, he was just thirty, he was a very young man. He did not really have much experience of life, he is not wise in that way. But he has known something, something that is the very base of life. He has not moved on the branches of the tree of life, he has reached to the root. This is a totally different thing - and Matthew will miss it. He will gather notes; whatsoever Jesus says, he will gather. He will create a gospel out of it, he will spin theories. Both these men miss him totally.

Thomas, the third, who has reported these sayings, he is the disciple closest to Jesus. But his sayings are not included in the Bible, because Jesus and his closest disciples have to be excluded - they are dangerous.

THOMAS SAID TO HIM: MASTER, MY MOUTH WILL NOT BE CAPABLE OF SAYING WHOM THOU ART LIKE.

It is impossible to say. You are so many things, and you are so much - you are so overflowing, you are so multidimensional, my mouth will not be able to say it. I am unable to say anything, words are not enough. You cannot be compared to anybody, you are incomparable. And whatsoever I say will be wrong, because it will not be enough. Words are very narrow, and you are vast!"

So says Thomas: MASTER, MY MOUTH WILL NOT BE CAPABLE OF SAYING WHOM THOU ART LIKE. "No, impossible! I will not say anything, because it cannot be said. You cannot be caught in words, you are inexpressible!" Thomas comes nearest, but even the nearest is far away, the gap exists.

A similar story exists with Bodhidharma. He lived in China for nine years. He taught people, many meditated, many came nearer and nearer, and when he was leaving he asked his four disciples to say something about dharma, to say something about truth. The first three are just like these three:

Simon Peter, a man of morality - the most superficial; then Matthew, the man in search of knowledge - a little deeper than Simon but still very far away; then Thomas who said, "I cannot say anything."

But Bodhidharma was more fortunate than Jesus, because there was a fourth who really remained silent. He didn't even say this: "I cannot say." ... Because when you say, "I cannot say," you have said something; this has to be understood. The fourth remained absolutely silent. He simply looked in Bodhidharma's eyes, bowed down at his feet, and Bodhidharma said, "One has my bones, another has my flesh, another has my blood - and you are my very marrow." This fourth one would not say even as much as Thomas has said. He came closest, he became the marrow.

Jesus was not so fortunate. There are reasons: the climate was not good, the situation was absolutely different. China had known Lao Tzu, but the Jews have never known a man like Lao Tzu.

Lao Tzu created the very soil in which Buddha's seed could sprout beautifully. When Bodhidharma went to China the soil was ready. It had been tilled by Lao Tzu, Chuang Tzu - rare phenomena!

- and then Buddha's seed was carried by Bodhidharma. It flowered beautifully, it blossomed beautifully. Jesus was not so fortunate, the soil was not ready. There have been prophets in the Jewish culture, but not sages like Lao Tzu and Chuang Tzu, no. There have been saints, so Simon Peter was available. There have been moralists, because Moses put morality at the very base of Jewish culture: the Ten Commandments - they are the base.

There were men like Simon Peter because nothing exists without cause, nothing exists without a long tradition. A Simon Peter is not just an accident, a long history is needed behind him. Moses is the deepest cause, the root from where Simon Peter came: the Ten Commandments, the moral attitude towards the world, towards life. But there was no man like Lao Tzu who says, "All distinctions are false: the moment you say, 'This is good and that is bad,' you have divided life and killed it" - a man who was for the whole, not for the division. Bodhidharma was fortunate, and that is the reason he had four disciples, not three.

In a Jewish culture, at the most Thomas was possible. Look at the phenomenon of Thomas, what he is saying - and this is one of the basic problems. There are people who say, "Nothing can be said about God," but they have said something. Even if you say, "Nothing can be said about God,"

you have said something. If you are correct then you have made a mistake. If you are correct - nothing can be said - then this should not be said either; you should remain completely silent. You have created a dilemma: on the one hand you say nothing can be said, but if this much can be said then why not a little more? What is the problem? If this much can be asserted, then why not more?

If assertion is possible, then more assertion becomes possible.

That is why Buddha remained absolutely silent. He would not even say, "Nothing can be said about God." He would not say even this much. You ask about God and he would talk about something else. You ask about God and he would not listen - as if you had not asked about God - he would simply drop the subject, he would talk about something else. He would not even say this much, that nothing can be said, because this is absurd. Then why are you saying it? Even through negation we indicate. Not only is positive assertion an assertion, negative assertion is also assertion.

You say, "God has no form." What do you mean? Have you known him? And have you known him so totally that you can say, "He has no form"? If you have known him totally, then he has form. For example, you say that this ocean cannot be measured; it is so deep, it cannot be measured. Then there are only two possibilities: either you have measured it, because only then can you say it is so deep that it cannot be measured; or if you have not measured it, how can you say it is so deep it cannot be measured? Even depth is measurable - has to be, it cannot be immeasurable; howsoever deep it is, it can be measured.

When you say, "God has no form," have you come to his boundaries and seen that there is no form? Because you have come to the boundaries, he has form. And if you have not come to the boundaries, then don't say he is formless, because he may have form. When you come to the boundaries, only then can you know. So those who have really stumbled upon God - it is a stumbling - who have fallen into him, will not say anything, not even this, because this is contradictory.

One of the keenest logicians of this century, Wittgenstein, has written a beautiful sentence. In his book Tractatus Logico Philosophicus, he has many beautiful statements. This is the best: he says, "Nothing should be said about something which cannot be said. If nothing can be said about a thing, one should remain silent."

Thomas comes closest, but remains distant. He has still tried to say, tried to express the inexpressible.

THOMAS SAID TO HIM: MASTER, MY MOUTH WILL NOT BE CAPABLE OF SAYING WHOM THOU ART LIKE.

JESUS SAID: I AM NOT THY MASTER... because nobody understands me, so how can I be thy master?

If you understand, only then can you be a disciple. If you understand, only then can you enter into the temple. If you understand, only then can you enter the being of the master.

JESUS SAID: I AM NOT THY MASTER....

To all the three he says: I AM NOT THY MASTER. Thomas came closest but still missed. He is the best, but still not perfect - just approximately the best. He comes closer but a barrier remains: he still believes in words, because he tries to express that which cannot be expressed.

I AM NOT THY MASTER, BECAUSE THOU HAST DRUNK, THOU HAST BECOME DRUNK FROM THE BUBBLING SPRING WHICH I HAVE MEASURED OUT.

Here he is stating a very profound truth. He is saying, "All three of you are talking from the mind - THE BUBBLING SPRING WHICH I HAVE MEASURED OUT - which I have gone beyond - MEASURED OUT. You are still talking from the mind: one is talking through the moralist mind, another is talking through the theological mind, the third is talking through the mystic mind - but still, all are part of the mind. And if you talk from the mind, I AM NOT THY MASTER... because the whole emphasis is: drop the mind!"

That is what a master goes on insisting: Drop the mind! And you play a trick: you start talking about the master from the same mind he has been insisting to drop. That's why I say Bodhidharma was more fortunate: he had a disciple who remained really silent, he would not answer.

There have been even more fortunate masters. One of them was Rinzai. He asked the same thing - because really it is the same story again and again: Buddha and his disciples, Jesus and his disciples, Bodhidharma and his disciples, Rinzai and his disciples - the story is the same. It cannot be different because the relationship is the same, the phenomenon is the same. Rinzai was even more fortunate. What happened? When he asked his chief disciple, "Say something about truth,"

what did the disciple do, do you know? You cannot even conceive. He slapped the master! And the master laughed and he said, "Right, you did well, because how can one answer when the very question is wrong?"

And this is the most fortunate master! How can you answer a question when the very question is wrong? The disciple is saying, "Don't be foolish, don't play games with me, don't try to put me in a puzzle. Don't throw me in illogical nonsense, because if I answer it will be wrong, and if I don't answer that will also be wrong - because a master is asking. If I answer it will be wrong, because the very nature of truth is such that it cannot be expressed; if I don't answer, that will be impolite - a master is asking, I have to answer." This is what he said when he slapped the master. Rinzai laughed and he said, "Right! When a disciple can slap the master, he has become a master in his own right. Now you go and teach others."

JESUS SAID: I AM NOT THY MASTER, BECAUSE THOU HAST DRUNK, THOU HAST BECOME DRUNK FROM THE BUBBLING SPRING WHICH I HAVE MEASURED OUT.

You are all still drunkards, drunk with the same madness of the mind! Mind is the source of all madness - there can be degrees, but everyone who has a mind is more or less mad. Mind is equivalent to madness. You may not be too much, you may be just lukewarm mad, so you are not boiling, not evaporating - nobody is thinking of sending you to the madhouse. You are just lukewarm mad, workably mad; you can work, you can move around and keep your madness inside. A man goes beyond madness only when he goes beyond mind. That's why Jesus says you are drunk:

... THOU HAST BECOME DRUNK FROM THE BUBBLING SPRING WHICH I HAVE MEASURED OUT. All three of you are speaking from the mind. You have not looked at me, because when you look there is no mind.

Don't carry a mind to a master. It is stupidity, because if you carry a mind to a master, you are not going nearer to him. You will not attain to satsang, you will not be in his presence; you will be filled with your mind, you will be drunk with your mind. When he is there you will be thinking, chattering.

Inside, the mind will go round and round and round and will create a wall, and it will be impossible for Jesus to penetrate you.

AND HE TOOK THOMAS - BECAUSE HE WAS THE NEAREST, THE BEST; HE WITHDREW - INTO ALONENESS - AND HE SPOKE THREE WORDS TO HIM.

NOW WHEN THOMAS CAME TO HIS COMPANIONS, THEY ASKED HIM: WHAT DID JESUS SAY TO THEE?

He had to work with the second best, the best was not available. Thomas was chosen. He took him and said three words to him.

NOW WHEN THOMAS CAME TO HIS COMPANIONS, THEY ASKED HIM: WHAT DID JESUS SAY TO THEE?

They are still interested in what Jesus says, not in what Jesus is. They are still interested in knowledge, words, not interested in the being.

THOMAS SAID TO THEM: IF I TELL YOU ONE OF THE WORDS HE SAID TO ME, YOU WILL TAKE UP STONES AND THROW AT ME; AND FIRE WILL COME FROM THE STONES AND BURN YOU UP.

This is very mysterious. Those three words have not been recorded, and Thomas never told the other disciples what those three words were. But he gives indications - because when you are not ready only indications can be given; when you are not ready only hints can be given. If you are really an inquirer, through the hints you will reach the secret. The final secret cannot be given, you have to be ready for it. The more ready you are, the more it becomes revealed. He gives hints, so first try to understand the hints.

IF I TELL YOU ONE OF THE WORDS HE SAID TO ME, YOU WILL TAKE UP STONES AND THROW AT ME; AND FIRE WILL COME FROM THE STONES AND BURN YOU UP.

One thing he says: "If I say even a single word" - Jesus has said three, but "If I say even a single word, you will immediately start to throw stones at me." What does he mean?

Man lives in lies - every man, because lies are very convenient, comfortable. Truth is hard, inconvenient, uncomfortable. Lying is just like going down - you go easily, with dancing feet. Truth is going high, up - it is difficult, arduous, you perspire, it is not comfortable. Lies are convenient, comfortable, because you can make them, you can invent them. You can invent your own lie to fit you, but you cannot invent truth. This is the problem, the rub.

You can invent lies: you just go to a tailor and he makes a garment for you; you can make lies for yourself like garments, lies that fit you. But truth is not going to fit you, you cannot invent it; you will have to fit with the truth - you will have to cut yourself. Truth cannot be cut like a garment; to fit truth, you will have to change. Lies are beautiful because you need not change - you simply change the lie and it fits you. It is very cosy, it clings to you, it never forces you to change, you can remain static, stagnant.

The lie is always with you, never against you. And truth - truth does not bother: if you want to be true, you have to change yourself. Truth cannot be invented, it has to be discovered - it is already there. That's why man lives in lies, because you can invent your own lies.

Each country has its own lies, each race has its own lies, each religion, church, temple, gurudwara has its own lies. And they are very cosy, they cling to you - they protect you from the truth. That's why, whenever truth is asserted, you will start throwing stones at the man who asserts it: because if he is true, your whole life is false. That's very difficult to realize - you have invested so much in it, you have lived for it. Your dreams are all that you have got, your lies are all that you have got, and somebody comes and throws a truth...?

So there are only two possibilities: either you are ready to collapse completely, or you will throw stones at this man, because throwing stones at this man will not allow his truth to shatter your lies - you can move again in your lies.

Psychologists have come to understand that man cannot live without lies. And as far as ninety-nine percent of people are concerned, they are right; the one percent we can leave - they are exceptional.

Freud, Jung, Adler, all three great discoverers of the mind of man, are absolutely in agreement on one thing: that as man is, he cannot live without lies, he needs lies; they are a basic necessity like food, even more basic. You can live without food for three months, you cannot live without lies for even three seconds - it is like breathing.

Look what type of lies you live in! And whenever somebody supports your lie and makes it appear like a truth, you bow down to him. You are afraid of death, so you believe in the immortality of the soul. That is a lie for you - you don't know anything, not even the ABC about the soul; you don't know whether the soul exists or not, but you believe in its immortality. And when somebody argues and proves that the soul is immortal, you bow down to him, you pay respect and you say, "Here is a man who has known!" What has he done? He has simply supported your lie; now he has given more life to your lie. You remain the same: you don't know what the soul is, you never bothered to know it. But the lie helps you to live. Then you are not afraid of death because there is no death - the soul is immortal.

Hence, a very strange phenomenon has happened: this country, India, is the most cowardly on earth. Otherwise, how was it possible to make such a vast country a slave for hundreds of years?

... And to small races like the English - not even equal to a province! Five hundred million people being enslaved by thirty million people looks illogical. But whosoever came - Huns, Moghuls, Turks, the English - whosoever came, India was always ready to be a slave. Why so much cowardice?

And these people are the 'knowers of the self', and they say that they have the root knowledge and they know that the soul is immortal!

If the soul is immortal, how can you be a coward? If the soul is immortal, then nobody can be braver than you, because nothing is going to die; even when somebody is murdering you, you will not be afraid, because nothing is going to die. But this is not the thing - just the contrary is the thing: the soul is immortal, and yet Indians are the greatest cowards. Really, because they are cowards they hide their cowardice in the philosophy of the immortality of the soul. This immortality is not their knowledge. Buddha may have known, Yajnavalka may have known, but this is not a knowledge which can be transferred.

Self-knowledge remains individual. No country can possess it, it cannot become a heritage, it is not a tradition. A man knows and when that man dies that knowledge disappears from the world. It has to be discovered again and again and again, you cannot make it a possession.

This country is cowardly, but they have a beautiful theory. They are so afraid of death, you cannot imagine. Even to conquer Everest, foreigners have to come. Indians won't bother because everybody will say, "What foolishness are you going to do? And what are you going to get there?

Why put yourself in danger?" Indians are always afraid of danger; wherever there is danger, they will not move. And these people think that they know that the soul is immortal. No, that is a lie! Not that it is not true - for you it is a lie, and you are protecting your cowardice by it.

Look! India is a phenomenon - look around. You cannot find such a greedy people, miserly people, anywhere in the world. And they call the whole world materialist - a beautiful trick of the mind. They are spiritualists and the whole world is materialist; whenever they look at a Western man, deep down they say, "You materialists!" And you cannot find a more materialistic man than the Indian. He lives for money, is greedy for possessions; it is impossible for him to give anything, he has forgotten how to give, he clings to everything. But he calls the whole world materialist, "And we are spiritualists" - a lie, a patent lie, but repeated so many times it looks like truth. It is false.

Everybody invents his private lie also. These are public lies, then you invent your private lies, and you live in them. They help you in a certain way: you may be a coward, but you think yourself a brave man, and you try to act like a brave man. That helps a little, because really if you are a coward and you feel that you are a coward you will stop moving in life. You will say, "I am a coward"; you will be paralyzed.

So psychologists say that without lies man cannot live - even a coward moves into life. And this happens almost always: whatsoever you are, you will create the opposite lie, and you will overact it to make others believe and to make yourself believe. You will overact it - a coward will overact: he will become a daredevil, but he is a coward, otherwise there will be no overacting. He may move into danger even where there is no need to move, just to show others and to convince himself that, "I am not a coward." But deep down he is afraid of his cowardice; fearful, so he projects the opposite.

A greedy man can renounce the world, become naked, just to convince himself that, "I am not greedy." But this is not going to help. This is a lie. Just by throwing clothes and leaving the house you cannot leave greed, because greed is not outside. It is not part of the house, it is not part of your treasures, it is part of you. Wherever you go - naked or in clothes - it makes no difference.

Now greed is trying to hide itself by overacting, by moving to the opposite extreme of renunciation.

A man who is without greed will be without renunciation, because he doesn't need to overact. A man who is without fear will be without so-called bravery, because he doesn't need to overact. A man who has come to understand his being will be neither on this extreme nor the other. He will be balanced, his life will be a balance.

What do you think? A Buddha is moving and a snake comes. What will he do? He will simply jump out of the way! What will you call him, a coward or a brave man? He is just a sensitive man, a man of understanding. You will like that man who remains there, doesn't bother what the snake is doing - the snake even bites him and he remains there - you will call that man brave. But he is foolish, not brave. And deep down he must be a coward; to hide this cowardice he remains there.

But if you see Buddha jumping out of the way of the snake you will feel, "What type of man have I been following? This is a coward!" He is not a coward. When a snake is there, one has to move out of the way. This is simple intelligence. It is just as if somebody is honking his horn and you are standing in the middle of the road and you think you are a brave man. You are simply stupid! And standing there, whom are you convincing? Yourself, deep down, that "I am a brave man."

A man of understanding never moves to the opposite; he moves with understanding. Whatsoever the situation that arises, whatsoever the situation is, he responds with his awareness; he is neither brave nor a coward. You are either a coward or brave, but the other is hiding there: even a cowardly man can become brave in certain situations, even a brave man proves to be a coward in certain other situations.

Look at this problem: the bravest man, when he comes home, becomes a coward - even a Napoleon before Josephine is a coward. Why does it happen that a husband who is such a great fighter in the world, in competition, in the market, simply becomes a coward before his poor wife? What happens?

And don't think that this is about others, that you are not the man - every husband is henpecked!

This looks like an exaggerated statement. It is not, because out of sheer necessity, every husband has to be henpecked: the whole day he is brave, so at home he wants to relax from the bravery. And if he is not relaxed even at home, then where will he find the relaxation? So the moment he enters his home, he puts aside his armor.

He has been brave in the market, fighting continuously - competition, enemies. There is war, a continuous war in the world; the whole day he fights. When he comes home he is tired of fighting, tired of bravery - you cannot be brave twenty-four hours a day. Remember, nobody can be brave twenty-four hours a day - you can only be alert twenty-four hours a day. Except that, everything moves with the opposite.

You come home, you are tired, you want rest; now you cannot fight - you have been fighting the whole day. And what has your wife been doing the whole day? She has no competition, she has no war going on around her; she is just in the home, protected, the whole day she has been resting. In a way, there was no point during the whole day where she could show her bravery. So she is tired of being a coward, just a wife. You come home - she is ready. She will jump on you!

Once it happened: There was a lion-tamer, a very brave man. But he was always afraid of his tiny wife. And whenever he was late there was trouble. One night with friends he forgot completely, drank too much, and then by midnight he became aware, remembered that he had a wife and a home. And to go back home now would be very difficult, so where to hide? Not finding any place - because it was a small town and if he went to any hotel his wife would come and catch hold of him - not finding any place open, he went to the lions' cage in the zoo where he was a tamer. The key was with him, he opened the door: six big ferocious lions in the cage! He slept - he used a lion's back as a pillow.

His wife searched all over the town. In the early morning, not finding him anywhere, she went to the place where he was working as a lion-tamer. He was sleeping, fast asleep, snoring. She poked the man inside the cage with her umbrella and said, "You coward! Come out, and I'll show you!"

This is bound to happen: if you choose one extreme, the other follows you. You may be a brave man somewhere, but you will be a coward somewhere else. It has to be so, because cowardice will be a relaxation. So that's why I say, out of sheer necessity a husband has to be henpecked. There is only one way that a husband is not henpecked: if he functions as a wife at the house, and the wife goes out and works. Then he is not henpecked, because then he is no longer a husband - he is really a wife, and the wife is the husband.

Every extreme hides the other in it, and you have to show it somewhere; otherwise it will be too burdensome, it will be impossible to live under it. Only intelligence, awareness, what Buddhists have called prajnyan, a meditative state which is of balance, is always relaxed. A state of awareness is just like a cat: even when she is asleep she is alert. Just a little sound in the surroundings and she will jump on her feet, fresh, alert, awake. A mind who has remained in the middle, balanced, even if he is asleep, remains alert. There is no relaxation, because relaxation is not needed - he has never been tense, he has never been a brave man nor a cowardly man. He has understood both and gone beyond.

Man lives in lies. He has to because he is trying not to accept the whole of his being, only part is accepted. Then what to do about the other part? He has to create some lie to hide it.

THOMAS SAID TO THEM: IF I TELL YOU ONE OF THE WORDS HE SAID TO ME, YOU WILL TAKE UP STONES AND THROW AT ME....

Truth has always been welcomed that way. It is not easy to assert truth: those who listen to it will become your enemies, they will start throwing stones. They are not really against you, they are only protecting themselves, their lies: ... YOU WILL TAKE UP STONES AND THROW AT ME....

And then he says a very beautiful thing: ... AND FIRE WILL COME FROM THE STONES AND BURN YOU UP. You will throw stones at me, you will throw stones at the truth - but from the stones a fire will come up and burn you.

You cannot burn truth, you cannot crucify truth. You crucified Jesus. That's why I was saying yesterday that when Jesus was crucified by the Jews, he was not crucified - they crucified themselves. And the fire has been burning since then, and they avoid and they escape from the fire - but it follows. You can throw stones, but truth is never hurt.

The moment you throw stones at the truth, it means that you will be hurt, finally you will burn; a fire will come out of your own stones. And this is the whole history of the Jews: for twenty centuries continuously they have been burning. And I am not saying that those who have been torturing them are right. No! I am not a supporter of Hitler, or others who have been burning and destroying Jews; no, they are not doing right. The Jews are carrying their wound within themselves - they create their Hitlers. This will look very, very difficult to understand.

A guilty man moves around to find someone who will punish him. When nobody is punishing him, he feels living more difficult. When someone punishes him, he feels at ease. Have you seen children?

If you don't punish them, they will punish themselves; they will slap their own faces - that relaxes them. A child has done something wrong and he looks to see whether father or mother or somebody has come to know or not, he is in search of that. If they have come to know, they can beat the child, and the child is at ease because now he has been punished. Finished. The account is closed; he did wrong and he has been punished. But if nobody knows, then he is in difficulty: something remains incomplete. He will move into a corner and slap his own face. Then he is at ease.

That is what is happening with people who do austerities: they have done something wrong - whether it is wrong or not is not the question, they think they have done something wrong - then they go on punishing themselves. You think they are moving into a deep tapascharya, austerity; they are great saints. They are simply guilty people punishing themselves. They may fast, they may beat their own chests, they may even burn themselves alive, but they are simply guilty children, immature, punishing themselves; they have done something wrong and they want to create the balance. They want to say to God, "I have punished myself enough, now you need not punish me." This is what Jews have been doing. This is one of the very deepest complexities of the human mind.

Jews are always in search of their Adolf Hitlers, somebody who can kill them - then they feel at ease. When nobody bothers about them, then they are uneasy; the guilt follows. When you throw stones at truth this is bound to happen, and even after twenty centuries of suffering the Jews have not confessed that they did wrong. No! Jesus is still unaccepted, they go on behaving as if Jesus never existed; Jesus is still not part of them. And I tell you, unless they reclaim Jesus they will remain in trouble. And the trouble is not being created by others, they seek it. They are guilty people, and their guilt is very great.

Crucifying a Buddha, crucifying a Jesus, crucifying a Krishna - can you conceive of anything more guilty? Jesus who was to be followed and worshipped, Jesus who was to be followed and lived - and you did just the opposite. Jesus who should have become your life, your very life, your throbbing heart - you did just the opposite: you killed him. Rather than making him your life, you destroyed his life. This wound will follow the Jews. It is difficult to get rid of it - unless they reclaim Jesus.

The Hindus are better. That's why they are less guilt-ridden: they never killed Buddha. Buddha was more dangerous than Jesus, he uprooted the whole of Hinduism - from its very roots. Jesus said, "I have come not to destroy the tradition, but to fulfill it." Never Buddha! He said directly, "I have come to uproot the whole tradition. All the Vedas are rubbish!" But Hindus never killed him, that's why Hindus could live without guilt. Not only did they not kill him - they are very clever and prudent people - they even made him an avatar. They accepted him - just a little gone astray, but nothing much to bother about. They accepted him into the tradition. They say, "He is our tenth avatar," and they created a story around him - that's why I say they are very clever and prudent people.

No other race is so clever; it has to be, because Hindus are the oldest, more wise. Experience has taught them much: that if you crucify Buddha you will never be free of him, because he will follow you, haunt you, so don't crucify - neglect. But even if you neglect him, something of you will again and again look back. The man is there, so it is better to accept him - and they accept him in such a rejecting way. This is prudence.

They created a story: God created hell and heaven, but for millions of years nobody reached hell because nobody was sinning. Everybody was religious, righteous; everybody was going to heaven.

Then the Devil went to God and said, "Why? What have you created hell for? This is useless.

Nobody comes, and I am tired of waiting and waiting. So do something - otherwise close it down!"

God said, "Wait, I will send a man - Gautam Buddha - to the world. He will confuse people, and when people are confused they go astray, they will start entering into hell." And since then hell is overfull. But Hindus accepted Buddha as an avatar sent by God - and they rejected him in a very subtle way. They have never been guilty.

The Jews have remained guilty; the wound follows them and they are still not reclaiming Jesus.

They should reclaim him. He was a Jew - born a Jew, lived a Jew, died a Jew - he was never a Christian; they can reclaim him. And no other Jew has come of that caliber. Many great Jews have been born, even in this century. The greatest in this century have been Jews - Jews are people of very great potential: Freud is a Jew, Marx is a Jew, Einstein is a Jew - all the three greats who have created this whole century - but nothing to compare with Jesus! They have rejected the greatest of the Jews. Once they reclaim him, they will be at ease, their wound will heal. They will be healthy and whole, and then there will be no need for Adolf Hitlers.

They create their Hitlers, and when I say this to you, you also remember: whenever you feel guilty you create the punisher. You seek for punishment, because the punishment will make you guilt-free, then you can come to rest. Don't feel guilty, otherwise you will seek punishment.

Enjoy life in its totalness, otherwise you will feel guilty. Accept life as it is, and be thankful for it as it is; have a deep gratitude - that's what makes a religious man. And once you accept the whole, you become whole. All divisions disappear, a deep silence ascends in you... you are filled with the unknown, because when you are whole, the unknown knocks at your door.

Enough for today.