Darshan 26 September 1977

[Osho tells an initiate to close her eyes and to feel a sound arising from her heart. Let yourself be possessed by the sound. If it starts coming - any sound - allow it. If you start saying it loudly, go with it; go into it.

Osho then explains the meaning of prem bhajan - worship through sound. Bhajan is offering god your heart's song... ]

And it is there - you have just to cooperate with it and it will come. A thousand and one songs will burst out in you.

Everybody carried the possibility more or less, but your predominant character is the possibility of going into god through sound; sound is your element. So don't be afraid. Join all the music groups here - dance, singing - and get in tune with them. Sometimes it will look crazy, because the world does not believe in music, it believes in mathematics. The world does not believe in celebration; it believes in calculation.

The world can allow a few people to sing and dance - just as an entertainment, not more than that. It's okay if music is entertainment because in entertainment nothing is involved; you are not committed to it. But when music becomes life the world is absolutely against it. Then the world will tell you that you are crazy.

But the head has one kind of sanity and the heart has another kind of sanity. The sanity of the head looks insane to the heart and vice versa: the sanity of the heart looks insane So the mind. They don't meet; they are enemies. And you are not a mind person, remember.

But this society goes on teaching everybody the mind stuff. So even the person who is heart-oriented is stuffed through the mind. If he is a mind person there is not much harm because that was his

need, but if he or she is a heart person then the harm is immense. And you are a heart person so you will have to slip out of the head. That is not your way and that cannot be your door.

All this is implied in the name 'love worship' - prem bhajan.

[Osho gives sannyasin to someone who begins crying. She says she has been in primal therapy for five years.]

I had the suspicion! When you started crying I had the suspicion that it was something from the primal, mm? But it has not happened yet; you have not reached the primal. You have tried; you have not reached yet. Once you reach to the primal crying disappears. It has to disappear; that is the indication.

It will become more and more intense when you are moving towards the primal - towards the first moment of life when you were coming out of the womb and you were suffocated by the tunnel. It was narrow and dark, and the child was being uprooted from somewhere where he had lived for nine months.

Those nine months are almost eternal, because the child has no idea of time. And things are so beautiful, so beginningless, so endless, and he is so happy. Psychologists say he is in paradise - floating in the liquid of the mother's womb. Not knowing any worry, not knowing any tension, not knowing any responsibility - absolutely at ease and relaxed. Then suddenly the world starts and there is a great trauma.

When the child is born there is a great shock to the whole system. That shock is the primal. One has to go backwards to relive that shock. Once that shock is relived you are freed from all crying.

Then instead of crying, laughter starts arising in your heart, and real laughter arises only then.

Only a primal process can bring a person to real laughter, otherwise people go on laughing but the laughter is not true. It is just manipulated, managed; it is fake, it is pseudo. It is just on the mask - not on their real face. Just the mask goes on smiling; it does not come from the heart. It is just created in the throat. It is shallow.

Only after a primal experience does one start laughing. Then the laughter comes from the very soles of your feet. It spreads all over your body. It is mad! It is authentic, it is existential, it is great ecstasy! But it has not happened. Maybe you went into primal too early. There are a few other processes to do, mm? then one becomes easily able to go into the primal; otherwise one goes on resisting.

Sometimes it happens that the primal therapist goes on prodding you, provoking you, and just to make him happy you start pretending... just to make him happy - poor fellow, poor chap! He is working so hard that one starts feeling that it is better to give him a little reward. That happens to many people, mm? - to people who feel for others, who care for others. Then you start screaming and he feels very good. You say 'Okay. Even if I am not feeling good, you are feeling good; that is worth it.' One starts obliging the therapist. That's what must have happened: you must have obliged the therapist.

But it is going to happen. Do a few other groups first and then I will give you primal here, mm ?

One has to go with a very very patient mind. One has to allow it to happen. One has to prepare many things before one can go into the primal. That's why it works only on a few people - others are not ready. Not more than five percent of people are benefited by the primal. The ninety-five percent go on hanging - for years they can hang - and one day they get fed-up with the whole thing and they drop out.

Yes, there will be some benefit from it. Even crying so long and kicking and shouting is good, mm?

- that is a catharsis. It is good as far as it goes but it does not go far enough. So a few other groups and then I give you primal!

[Osho tells an initiate to close his eyes and feel as if he is standing before a great source of light.... ]

You are facing the sun and the light is showering on you. It is brilliant, bright, it is dazzling. The body starts swaying and trembling before this experience. Absorb it, drink it, and let the body have its own movements. If it starts shaking, trembling, allow it.

Anand means bliss and rasal means full of juice - full of the juice of bliss. And everybody is full of the juice but we never look at it, we never taste of it. We never drink at our own source - hence we remain thirsty. The waters of life which can quench each and every thirst are just flowing within everybody. That is the meaning of your name. So look within, search within, drink within... and much is going to happen!

[A seeker says she is afraid to take sannyas. In reply to Osho's query she says she has no work.]

Mm mm, then there is no fear! There is only fear that if you work somewhere then problems will arise. Otherwise there is no problem - your life is yours. And if you are going to be here long it will be good if you are a sannyasin; things will happen faster and sooner. Otherwise you will remain a little distant from my people. You will feel that and they will feel that. There will be a kind of gap. And you will always remain afraid of sannyas - that if you go too much into things then maybe sannyas will happen. So you remain a little in control and go only so far.

This is my observation: people who are not sannyasins go only so far because the one fear is always there - that if they go too much into things sannyas will happen. So it is good to become a sannyasin.

Finish that fear from the very beginning so you don't have to fear anymore. Mm? Whatsoever had to happen, has happened. 'The worst has already happened - you have become a sannyasin! Now there is nothing else! What should I do? Should I make you a sannyasin?... Now I take your fear away from you. Now things will be easier.

Deva means divine, mahima means splendour - divine splendour. And each thing in life is nothing but a signal of the divine, god's signature. Rocks and the moon and stars and man and animals and birds are different forms of god's splendour. god's greatness. Everywhere god is expressing himself. Forms are many but behind all forms there is only one formless reality. Songs are many but the singer is one. Paintings are many but the painter is one. So great respect is needed towards yourself, and you cannot respect others if you don't respect yourself. Respecting yourself has nothing to do with ego. Respecting yourself is simply respecting god. And when you respect yourself, you can respect all.

But people have been taught to condemn themselves, to think about themselves in a very horrible way, to think that they are worthless, sinners, worms, ugly. That's what the so-called religions have been teaching people - a kind of self-damnation. And when people feel condemned, how can they respect others? - because they see the same kind of people all around. If they cannot respect themselves, they cannot respect anything, and hence they cannot respect god. Because he is the author of all. If you can't respect yourself, how can you respect the creator who has created you?

So my whole teaching teaches self-respect. And it has nothing to do with self, it has nothing to do with the ego. A really self-respecting person is very humble, simple. He is humble and grateful because god has chosen him to be. That is the meaning of mahima.

[The ashram doctor who is setting up a medical laboratory says that while he really enjoys his work he tends to feel a certain amount of stress with it too... ]

No, that must be just an old habit. You have to drop the stress. The work has to be just a joy. There is no need to be in any stress or strain, because we are not performing anything. This is just your way of worship; this is your way of being here with me. You are not going to gain anything out of it, so why be in any stress?

Stress comes when one is result-oriented. You will not get anything out of it; you are doing it out of the sheer joy of doing it. Stress is irrelevant. Stress is natural when you are looking for some result, mm? Then the result is heavy on the head - whether you will be able to make it or not, whether you will be able to succeed or not, whether you will be able to compete with others or not, whether you will be the first or the second or the third, what is going to happen.

But here there is no competition with anybody; there is no result to be got out of it. It is just for the sheer joy of doing it. Because you know how to do it you would like to share, that's all. So enjoy it.

Learn how to enjoy it more and don't be worried about it. Nobody is observing you and nobody is going to judge you.

This is one of the basic things every sannyasin will have to learn - that there is no result out of it.

Then stress simply disappears.

Stress comes always out of the goal. When there is no goal there is no stress. It is more like a morning walk than going anywhere. You can enjoy the sun and the birds and the trees and the people on the road. And you can turn back from anywhere because you were not going anywhere; there was no target.

[A sannyasin therapist, Veeresh, who works in a drug-rehabilitation centre in Holland is having confrontations with the authorities because of the number of people there who have taken sannyas.]

You will have to give a good fight!...

This is going to happen. This is the same situation as it happened with the early disciples of jesus:

wherever they went there was trouble. It is natural. Now, because you are almost twenty sannyasins there, the powers, the people who possess the institution - or think that they possess - will become afraid. Now you are becoming powerful, the orange is becoming powerful. Twenty persons in

orange; soon there will be fifty persons. And then the whole institute will go to the orange people, that is the fear. What they say is irrelevant - the basic fear is of power.

No need to be afraid. A good fight has to be given. That will be a good challenge for you and for other sannyasins too.

And enjoy it! It has not to become a tension, it should not become a worry - let it be playful. Laugh about it, let it be fun! And give the fight also, in a new way. Not in a political way - in a religious way.

For example, if you want to protest there is no need to shout slogans. Have a good dance around the boss. You can do Kundalini! You can play music and sing songs.

This has to be done and this is a good beginning. More and more people will be coming.

And there is no need to compromise for anything... whatsoever the consequence. If you are thrown out from there then this is your home; you can come any time. Mm? I am making a situation here so that anybody who is thrown out from anywhere will be welcomed home. There is no need to be worried about that. So you can fight with total heart. There is no need to think about the finance and no need to think about what will happen tomorrow and if you are thrown out, fired, then where will you be? No need to worry - I'm your home. So you can fight anywhere, you can go to any extreme, you can accept any consequence that comes out of it... and no need to worry!

And this will become a pioneer thing, because in other places also that is going to happen. If one sannyasin is there in an institute, people will laugh. If two are there they will become a little serious.

If three are there, they will start fighting. One is good - you can laugh about him; no need to take him seriously - but when two are there then people will become serious. When three are there the whole trinity is there; then there is danger. One can be tolerated easily but now you are twenty there.

You are already a force: you can decide the fate of the institution. And we are not going to leave the institution so easily!

If the people who don't want sannyasins there, if they want to leave they can. Just tell them that sannyasins will take over the whole thing....

Collect all the sannyasins and tell them whatsoever I have told you - that it has to become worship.

This will be worship, this will be a gesture of love towards me. This will be sacrifice but let it be. And you will come out of it more integrated, more centred than ever.

There are a few things which happen only when there is a great challenge and great danger, otherwise they don't happen. The greater the challenge, the greater the integration. It is a blessing.

You will become closer. The twenty sannyasins will no more remain aloof and separate from each other - they will become more one. And you will start planning and thinking what to do and how to do it. And this is going to happen to many more people, so it will become a precedent. Others can learn from your experience of what happened.

And as I can see it, if you give a good fight the institute is going to be yours... because I don't teach escapism. Give a good fight... of course, playfully - no antagonism about any person, no personal feeling, nothing. But they cannot force you because that is destroying your freedom.

The institute cannot say to you that you have to come without orange; they cannot say that.

Otherwise go to the court, take it to the court, and let it become a big thing. Let people think about it and talk about it. Let it be in the newspapers and... Perfectly good! Let it be a scandal!