Darshan 12 September 1977

Anand means bliss, vasant means spring - bliss spring. And when bliss comes it comes like a spring. It was not there and suddenly it is there; suddenly the whole climate is different. It takes you unawares. It comes very unexpectedly, and one never knows from where it will start and begin.

which tree will bloom first, will have the first taste of spring, nobody knows. what part of your being will bloom first, nobody can say. It can be love, your heart. It can be intelligence, your head; it can be something else. It can be creativity - that suddenly you become creative, suddenly you start outpouring yourself into songs or poetry or painting. Or it may be that your silence blooms and all expression disappears and you are utterly silent. And that is the blooming of the spring - the flower of silence.

One never knows which tree will start, which tree will be the first receiver, what part of your being will receive it first and when. Neither the time is known nor is there any way to figure it out. But when spring comes then everything changes. Then the whole life has a totally different quality. Birds are singing in a different way. There is fulfillment and trees are delighted. The whole feel on the earth has a new verve, a new joy.

It is exactly the same when bliss comes: for the first time you start feeling that life has meaning - that it is not a meaningless desert, that it is not just a drag, that there is joy, there was joy, there will be joy; it was just that you were not aware of it. And once you are aware, you are a different man, a new man.

Orange in India is the colour of the spring, the colour of flowers, the colour of life. It symbolises many things. It symbolises the fire because fire is life. It symbolises the sun because the sun is the source of life. It symbolises blood, because blood is the source of life. And finally, it symbolises the colour of the spring.

So orange in India is called 'vasanti' - the colour of the spring... when the whole existence becomes colourful, psychedelic.

I am giving you this name so that you can remember two things: one, wait for bliss. You cannot grab it; it comes like spring. One can only wait. One can wait hopefully. One can wait very expectantly.

One can wait with great thrill. But one can only wait - nothing can be done about it. You cannot bring it; spring cannot be forced to come. It comes when it comes.

So the first thing to remember is that all that a man can do for god or for bliss or for truth, is to learn how to wait. But the waiting should not be the waiting of despair, anxiety, hopelessness. The waiting should be full of thrill, enthusiasm, trust, hope. And then it comes... it certainly comes! It is sure to come.

The moment waiting is total and you are utterly open for it, exactly in that moment, immediately, it happens. And when it happens, then only do you know what joy is. Before that, whatsoever you had known as joy was nothing but a kind of entertainment, merriment. Those were toys that you were playing with because the real thing was missing. Then all those joys of the past suddenly fade out.

When the real comes, then only do you have the criterion to know what is unreal. All that you had known before simply becomes shadowy....

[A sannyasin who is leaving says she wants to say something to Osho but cannot think of anything.]

There is nothing or there is so much that it is difficult to say, but both are the same. Language is mediocre. If there is nothing to say, it cannot say it; if there is too much to say, it cannot say it. It is just luke-warm, just utilitarian... is needed for the day-to-day world.

Whenever you go beyond the day-to-day world - if it is love, if it is trust, if it is beauty - then suddenly the language flops down; it becomes absolutely inadequate. But there is no need to say everything that one wants to say. Sometimes it can be said without saying it. There are other ways to say it. One can just be silent; one can just be in deep love and gratitude. And the very vibe, the very pulsation, becomes communion.

Language at the most can communicate, but silence can create a communion. It goes far deeper because it comes from the depth. So no need....

[The sannyasin then asks: I was wondering if I could perhaps have a name for a centre there.]

You start! - that's what is needed now. That will be your way of saying things to me, mm?

This will be the name for the centre: prahari. It means the watchman. And everybody has to become a watchman in the inner world. Unless you start watching yourself, the ultimate mystery remains far away. We see things, people, but we don't see ourselves. Meeting people, seeing people is a kind of encounter, but unless our energy moves from encounter to 'in-counter', we will never be able to see the ultimate source of reality.

Becoming a watchman means entering into the world of in-counter. In encounter you face somebody, you respond to somebody... but the other is there. In in-counter there is nobody else. Only you are

there... open to yourself, singing a song to yourself, dancing a dance to yourself. You are all and all - the doer, the watcher, the object and the subject. But that is where the source of all consciousness is.

[A sannyasin, who had previously written a letter to Osho, is leaving and says she wants to bring her husband with her next time.]

It is not much of a problem. The mind is greed - and unless the mind disappears, greed goes on lingering in some way or other. Greed is simply nothing but the constant fear of the emptiness of the mind. It is an effort to somehow stuff the emptiness. So it can take any form. Sometimes you can go on stuffing food or relationships or love affairs and the mind can move from the world, can become spiritual. But it remains the same - the greed is greed; there is no worldly, no other-worldly greed. Greed is simply greed. You can be greedy for money and you can be greedy for meditation; it is all the same.

You can be greedy for power, you can be greedy for paradise - it is all the same. In fact the second greed is more dangerous because it is very subtle and you can pretend that you are not greedy.

Somebody searching for god can easily pretend he is not greedy. He has left his home, money, prestige. How can you say he is greedy ? He is standing naked in a cave, just searching for god; how can you call him greedy? He is greedy... but his greed is very subtle.

The worldly greed is very gross; it shows on the surface. His greed is deep inside him; will not show on the surface. And then it is more deceptive and more dangerous because even he may not be able to see it.

... But this is the nature of the mind. You cannot drop greed without dropping the mind itself. So don't make greed the problem - that's what I want to say: don't make greed the problem. The problem is the mind.

And this happens many times, that if you make greed the problem - which is just a symptom, not a cause... And whenever you start working from the effect, the symptom, you will be lost in a long struggle, unnecessary and futile, fruitless, because the cause is not there. The cause is hidden somewhere else - and you fight with the symptom.

Sometimes it is possible if you go on fighting too much that you can make the symptom disappear but then somewhere else, some other symptom will bubble up. The greed may disappear, anger may come; the anger may disappear, fear may come. The fear may disappear, then something else... because the cause is there.

It is as if you have put water on to heat and it is evaporating. Now, you don't allow the vapour to go out from this side, so you close that part. The vapour starts moving from another side - you close that; the vapour starts moving from the third side. And it is good that it goes on moving. If you really close it in from every side then you will go mad. You will simply explode into bits and pieces. That's what happens sometimes: a man can be so successful in stopping the symptoms of the disease that there is no 'let-out'. There is no safety valve allowed to work. The vapour can go on accumulating and can explode your whole being and throw you into pieces.

So never fight with any symptom; always look for the cause. The work has to be done where the cause is. And the cause is one and symptoms are many; then the problem is very simple. There is no need to fight with the greed, anger, sex, etcetera. They are all symptoms of an empty mind which is constantly hankering to fill itself because the emptiness creates fear. It is frightening that one is empty, that one is nothing. Although that nothingness is our nature we don't accept it; we go on rejecting It.

So my suggestion is that you start accepting emptiness. And you will be surprised: just by that acceptance, the strength of the symptoms will become very very very weak. They will start disappearing; they will start dying on their own accord.

First, accept emptiness; second, start rejoicing in it. And then the third experience will be there - that emptiness is your nature; there is no way to fill it. There is no need to fill it because it is you! And the more you fill it, the more you will be burdened, and the more you will be dragged downwards.

The more you will not be able to fly into the sky. For that, weightlessness is needed.

So accept, rejoice, and then see what happens. And sometimes emptiness has to be rejoiced in in other forms also; that will be helpful. For example, make your room completely empty and rejoice in emptiness. That's what zen people do. Their rooms are utterly empty. Just the most essential is there, otherwise it is empty. You can remove the essential within minutes and the room is completely empty. This is just acceptance of emptiness.

See a zen painting: the painting is just somewhere down in the corner and the whole canvas is empty. Now the western painter cannot figure it out. Why this wastage of canvas ? If you are going to just paint in a small part of the canvas, then why this big canvas? The western painting covers the whole canvas - it does not leave a single spot empty; it is too much afraid of emptiness. But the zen painting is really empty... as if those small figures and trees and rocks are just to emphasise the emptiness, to create a contrast so you can see the emptiness clearly - but that is the right proportion. Just look at the sky and the earth and the trees. They are just small, and the whole sky is empty; that is the proportion. Emptiness is more in life!

So keep zen paintings, keep your room empty. And sometimes start enjoying the emptiness when you are feeling hungry; rejoice in it. That is the meaning of fasting.

Fasting does not mean to force yourself to remain hungry, no. It simply means rejoicing in the emptiness when the stomach is empty, because when the stomach is empty there is a great door opening inside you. When the stomach is empty, one is more conscious; otherwise the energy gets involved in digesting. And you are not so conscious as you are when you are hungry. That's why if you are hungry you cannot sleep in the night. Food creates a kind of drugged state; it makes you unconscious.

So sometimes just enjoy the emptiness of the stomach. Feel the hunger, dance with hunger, sing a song with hunger. There is no hurry to fill it; one is not going to die. At least for three months... if you continuously don't eat for three months you will not die, so there is no hurry. One day one can miss! One can easily miss one meal, and you will be benefited by it.

And I'm not saying to force. Fasting should be a feasting; only then is it beautiful. So sometimes just enjoy a half an hour of hunger. Enjoy it, and just see what can happen when you are hungry. You will

feel more intelligent, you will feel more alert, more alive, more fresh; you will feel more weightless.

You can run, dance, in a better way, and you will feel more in tune with existence. That's why all the religions by and by started loving the idea of fasting. It was not a torture - it was a joy!

So anything that gives you a feeling of emptiness, start enjoying. Keep your bathroom completely empty, your room empty. Sometimes simply sit without doing anything; don't fill your life with activities. Sometimes just sit outside, doing nothing - watching the trees, the river, the clouds.

It will not be paying for you: they won't fill you; they will not do anything to you. You will just be doing something utterly useless but immensely beautiful. By and by you will be able to enjoy, and this enjoyment will change your greed. Nothing has to be done directly with greed.

And don't force your husband to come; just invite him. If he enjoys coming, bring him. But in no way should you put your trip on him... in no way. Otherwise that very thing becomes a barrier. He will come because you dragged him, you nagged him into coming, but then he will not feel in tune with me. So just make him available to me, share me with him; just let him be acquainted, that's all. If the desire starts coming in him, and it will come... Seeing you, watching you, feeling you, the desire will come because he will see that something immensely valuable has happened to you. And he will become interested; then it will be good.

[A sannyasin had submitted a question for discourse which Osho answered. Now the sannyasin is disturbed about the answer, and says that he now feels that what he has been experiencing was not real.]

No, it was real, but real things can be disturbed very easily. Never think that because something has been disturbed it was not real. That idea persists in people's minds - that reality has to persist.

Reality is very fragile. Unreality is very persistent. Misery persists more than blissfulness and any small thing can disturb it. In fact, if some small thing disturbs it that simply shows it was real.

So nothing to be worried about. And when you ask a question you get into trouble!

You have been happy too long so that can be... One starts looking for trouble. But nothing to worry about. No, everything is good - just a little noise in the mind - otherwise nothing to worry about.

It will come again - mm? tonight it will come. And you will start crying and weeping in gratitude.

Right?!