Darshan 20 March 1978
[A sannyasin with terminal cancer and a few weeks to live is returning to the west. Osho blesses him.]
Don't be worried... don t be worried. I am coming with you; don't be worried at all.
You have taken it really as it should be taken. I have been very happy. Just accept everything, and something is possible through that acceptance. Even if death comes one has to accept it joyously, as a gift from god. That is the way we can transform even the nature of death; that's the way to transcend death.
Death is going to come to everybody. It makes not much difference when; when is irrelevant. Today or tomorrow or the day after tomorrow - time is not of any significance. Death comes, death has already come with one's birth, so we are all going to die. All that can be done is in how we die.
Death cannot be avoided, nobody can avoid it; that is the only thing in life which is inevitable. So it is useless to think to avoid it. The only thing which can be done and which is of great significance is how to go through it, how to live it, how to live one's death. Live meditatively, live lovingly, take it as a gift, and you will be surprised: death will reveal to you more than life has given. Your death can become your satori.
And I have been very happy that you have been accepting things so easily, so relaxedly....
I am with you, and I am going to make this death far more valuable than life itself.
There are people who live and live in vain; and there are people who die but who die in such an artistic way, with such skill. with such awareness, that even death becomes a blessing. So if it comes, it comes; that is nothing to be worried about. Never pay a single thought to it....
Just enjoy and be happy. And because days are few one has to live very intensely and joyously.
Others can afford... they will be living for a few more years so they can afford to waste life; You can't afford to. You have to live each moment. Each moment is so precious.
So be meditative, be relaxed, be accepting. If it comes, we are going to transform it. If it doesn't come, we will wait! When it comes we will transform it then....
You will be able to attain to a great freedom through it, so simply go.
And your friends, your family, they may be disturbed. Tell them not to be disturbed, because they can affect you. Just tell them joyously that it is nothing to be worried about.
[Later in the darshan, Osho gives a record of Bach's 'St. John's Passion' to him, saying: Whenever you need me, just listen to this music; keep it with you!]
Apa means self, dipo means light. The light has not to be searched for somewhere else, it is already there within you. It has not even to be kindled, we just have to look within. It has been there forever and ever, from the very beginning. It is because of that inner light that we live. It is our life.
And that source is infinite, inexhaustible. It burns without any fuel. It needs nothing to happen, it is self-sufficient. But our eyes are turned towards the without. All our senses open towards the without, and we exist within. That is the dichotomy: our energy goes out searching and the one we are searching for goes on living inside.
One has to take an about-turn; that's all religion is about: an about-turn, a one-hundred-and-eighty- degree turn, and suddenly that which you were seeking is found.
Upasika means a worshipper - not a worshipper of any image but just a worshipper of life, of all that exists, a reverence for all that exists, a respect for all that lives. That is true religion. The idols that we worship in the temples are just bogus religion, pseudo. To avoid life we have created them, and the worship is cheap: you can go and worship in a temple or in a church and your life remains untransformed by your worship. Unless life is transformed by your worship, the worship is meaningless, a sheer wastage of time and a deception - to others and to oneself.
Be a worshipper of life... of the trees and the mountains and the people and the animals and the birds, and all that exists and lives and breathes. This is true god.
God is not a person but a presence, it is a subtle presence everywhere. You can feel it in the trees; it is there. You can feel it in the silence of the night, in the hustle and bustle of the day. One just needs a little sensitivity and suddenly it is there. That sensitivity is worship. And once you feel the presence, you cannot avoid being respectful towards it.
Anubhava. It means feeling. Thinking has to be slowly slowly dropped and replaced more and more by feeling. Lean towards feeling. Thinking is mechanical, a computer can do it. Feeling is human, no machine can ever do it. Only through feeling do we come to know our very ground, who we are; the question is not answered by thinking. And that's where we are lost. We are hung up in the head asking the question 'Who am I?' and no answer comes. The head cannot supply it; that is not the right place to ask it. The question has to resound in the heart. It has to vibrate in the body, it has to circulate in the blood, it has to move in the breath - and then the answer arises. k never comes from the outside; it comes from your very innermost core, your own innermost heart speaks to you.
Not to know oneself is to live a futile life. That is the primary value, everything else only starts afterwards. The first foundation of a real life is the answer of the question 'Who am I?'
Chetsa means living according to consciousness. There are two types of people in the world: the people who live according to conscience - the orthodox, the conventional, the square.... Conscience is created by the society in which they are born. The conscience is a conditioning from the outside. If they are born in Russia they are Communists; if they are born in a Catholic country they are Catholic; if they are born in India they are Hindus or Mohammedans. These are names of conditionings, and they live according to this conditioning. This is not true life, this is not life in god.
Life in god means a life of rebellion. One does not live by conscience; one starts living through one's own consciousness. Conscience is borrowed; consciousness is individual, it is yours. Conscience comes from the church, society, the priest, the politician, the parent; it is always from the outside. It is a kind of manipulation of the individual by the society. It is destructive of freedom. Consciousness arises in you.
That s why my whole emphasis is on meditation, because meditation is nothing but digging into your consciousness so that all the layers of conscience are broken, dropped. One becomes nude in one's consciousness and one lives accordingly; and that is beauty, that is benediction.
I am giving you one of the beautiful names. Contemplate over it and live accordingly. It will be a dangerous life but only through danger does one arrive.
The orthodox live only for the name's sake; they are dull and dead. Only dust gathers on their being, they don't have any sharpness of being. For that sharpness adventures are needed. And this is the greatest adventure there is: to live according to one's own consciousness.
Rupsa. It means beauty - beauty not of the form but of the formless, beauty not of the body but of that which is hidden in the body, beauty not of the house but of the master of the house.
The body can be beautiful; that does not make one beautiful. And sometimes it happens that beautiful people are very ugly within. The reason is that they think they are beautiful so they don't feel any need to create any inner beauty. And vice versa also happens: ugly people sometimes are utterly beautiful within; because they are ugly outside they have to find some substitute. But a man can be beautiful both on the surface and in the depth. A man can have both beauty of the body and the soul, then beauty has many dimensions to it.
Rupsa basically means the beauty that arises out of the meeting of the soul and the body, out of the meeting of the form and the formless. It is a kind of inner balance, an inner music, an inner melody.
That melody is heard in meditation or sometimes in love....