Darshan 24 March 1976

[A new sannyasin said she didn't understand how or why she had come here; it was just that she felt she needed to.

Osho said it was good to move with one's feelings rather than thinking too much, though it was of course safer to think, as society didn't feel threatened by that... ]

Feeling is dangerous for society, because a feeling person cannot be dominated, cannot be regimented; he is a rebel. and a thinking person is always a slave. Once you believe in logic, you believe in regimentation. Once you become too rational you become mechanical. Reason is a mechanism. Then your whole life is turned into a mechanical routine, and society needs, wants, efficient people - not alive people. Mechanically perfect - existentially dead.

So remember that. And whenever you feel that you are shifting towards thinking, always bring yourself back towards feeling. Even if everything is lost and feeling is saved, everything is saved.

And if you lose feeling and everything is saved, nothing is saved, mm? So - good that you came by feeling!

[A sannyasin asked if something could be done to help the discomfort he felt lately as his energy seemed to be moving very quickly and powerfully upwards through his throat 'like a ball of fire'. He said that sometimes the energy moved higher - up to his shoulders - and produced a sensation of much heat.

Osho gave him an 'energy darshan'. The sannyasin let out a series of screams which sounded as if they were just coming from the throat and were not being fully expressed. For a moment he sat silent, then gave out a bloodcurdling scream....

He said: I feel it is not finished.]

No, it will not finish so soon... it will take a little time. You just have to do a few things. Everything is good - the energy just needs to be a little more flowing.

Do one thing. Each night before you go to bed, stand with both hands raised, legs spread apart.

Loose, relaxed; not tight, mm? Then start feeling the energy coming up, and feel that you are joined with the earth. Imagine that you are a tree and your arms are the branches, and your legs, the roots. Branches in the sky spreading you towards the sun, and legs rooted in the earth. This is heaven/earth meeting. Forget yourself completely... just become a tree. Let the sky pull you up and the earth pull you down. Let them create a tension, and that will fix everything within a week. These things will disappear, and many beautiful things will happen. You will feel completely calm and quiet and centred.

So for seven days, do this, and then tell me. Do it for not more than twenty minutes. Even if it is beautiful, don't do it more than that, because then it will be difficult for you to get out of it. It becomes so beautiful that you forget time, so tell somebody that if you don't break it after twenty minutes, they should come and break it for you. The sky and the earth are so powerful that if you Continue, you can go completely mad.

But it is good; there is nothing to worry about. One should be happy about it. Good !

[Another sannyasin also said his energy flow was upsetting him. He said he felt it was unbalanced, and that while he felt comfortable when it moved in a downward direction, when it moved upwards, he felt uncomfortable.

Osho checked his energy.]

Mm mm. . .the energy is not coming in a continuous flow - that's why you feel uncomfortable. It is coming in spurts. It is as if petrol in a car is not coming continuously, so the whole car jogs.

... Good. You start a small method tonight. Have you done any Hatha Yoga - the headstand?...

Before you go to sleep, stand for three minutes on your head, and feel as if the whole of your energy is falling down into the head. Do it just for three minutes, no longer. Otherwise, though it may feel very very good, you will not be able to go to sleep. So do it at least an hour before you go to sleep.

After that, lie down for three minutes and feel that the energy is going back into the body, and then stand for three minutes and have a little dance.

So it will mean about ten minutes - three three minutes. Three minutes standing on the head, three minutes Lying down so that the energy becomes equalised, and then three minutes standing and dancing. Do this for not more than two weeks - and then tell me.

[The Tathata group was present. The group leader said: It was a very low energy group - I think because the weather was hot.

For me every group is like a reflection of life. I don't notice much of a difference between organised groups and day to day living.]

Mm mm.... There is no difference, and there should not be any. Life is a continuous encounter, a continuous growth process. And groups are nothing but intense moments in the same process, more focussed, so that things can be brought within a limited compass, seen more clearly. Ordinary life is like a lamp - the light is diffuse. A group is like a torch. The same light, but focussed so it pinpoints something.

So that's good - one should feel that way. Life and meditation should not be separate things... one ongoing process.

And it is possible that heat can bring people to a low energy level. But sometimes many things happen when people are on a low energy level, so there is nothing to be depressed about. Use all opportunities.

For example if a person is on a high energy level, then he will have more tendency towards anger.

The same mood on a low energy level will have a tendency to become more sad; not anger, but sadness. This too is good to know - that sadness is low energy anger, and anger is high energy sadness.

So never lose any opportunity. All opportunities reveal things. As seasons change, people change - because people are part of the seasons. It is not only the earth that goes on changing; and the climates; it is people also. Summer is not just something outside you. It is part of you... it penetrates you. When it is winter, it penetrates into you. When it is spring, it penetrates you. It is not only that in the spring the whole of nature becomes decorated with flowers and fragrance, there is aliveness...

birds starting to coo and seduce. The whole of nature, man included, becomes more seductive.

So the climate pervades and permeates everything. Man has to come to know himself in all the seasons all around the year. On a cool morning, you can feel very cool - (a chuckle) that is not something to feel very happy about. It is just the coolness of the morning. But when on a hot summer's afternoon you feel hot, it is not only that you perspire; deep down inside you, something else is disturbed.

By and by you will become aware that the climate continuously affects you. Then you have to find a centre in your being which is beyond climate. That is the point which is beyond earth. Then whether it is summer or winter or rain outside, it makes no difference. There is a point somewhere in you which remains completely untouched. It remains completely as it is; unscratched, aloof, far far away.

It never changes with the climate. That is the witness. That is what the Hindus call atman.

That which is affected is the body. That which reacts is the mind. That which is neither affected nor reacts is your soul. But that is the very deepest layer of your being, the very substratum. By and by one comes to it.

So go on working. All the year around you have to work in different situations, different moods, different climates, to help people to come to themselves, through different avenues. Many things will be revealed to them which cannot be revealed when they are feeling high. Many people have their glimpses when they are very ill.

You will be surprised to know that all the great artists, painters, poets, were a little pathological, ill; they were not very healthy people.

In fact healthy and robust people have not been creative. Health was too much. They had so much energy that they wasted it in the restaurants and with the prostitutes. They couldn't write a poem, they couldn't paint; they were boiling too much. And these things looked a little feminine - sitting and painting, or writing a poem. It is okay for someone who is ill and lying in bed, but not for a healthy person. Healthy people should go and fight and compete in the world.

Healthy people have been very destructive. Health has not always proved a blessing. They became generals, but they were never great painters or musicians or poets - not creators. If you look at the creators you will find that many of them were ill; their illness became a blessing.

But the point I would like to emphasize is that when you are ill, your energy is low, and a few things come up only when your energy is low. Otherwise it works like a weight; it doesn't allow things to come up. Have you watched? - if you have been ill for many days, ill, feverish, and suddenly the fever is not there, you are perfectly cool, collected. The storm has gone and there is a silence that you had not known before. You may not like it because it has an association with fever and illness, but if you look directly at it, it has a different quality. It is beautiful. It has its own space that no health can give you.

I am not against health (a chuckle). I am saying that even illness, if you are alert, can give you some spaces which are beautiful. And if you can use illness, of course you can use health. Then health can become a blessing. Always remember that everything can be used, has to be used.

[The groupleader asks: There's another question - of how far to let things go in the group - like anger and sex and things like that.]

Nothing can be decided beforehand. Each situation will decide, so I cannot give you a rigid rule.

It will depend on the person, on the situation, the mood, on the energy that is flowing around the group. It will depend on a thousand and one things. Sometimes small things will be going too much over the limit, and sometimes nothing will be beyond the limit. So no rigid rule is possible; one has to remain flexible.

Remain flexible and spontaneous, and never be afraid of committing a mistake. If you are too much afraid of committing a mistake, nothing can be done. One has to commit mistakes - that's the way one learns. By and by one becomes perceptive.

So always be ready. Whenever you are wondering whether to do or not, always do (laughter). Not- doing is not going to help - do it. If later on you feel that you have erred, tell people and say that it had to be done because you were not in any way experienced about it; that it had to be done for the experience. You can ask their forgiveness. If you become afraid of committing mistakes, that will become limiting, and growth will be hindered. Remain ready to commit a mistake, and ready to admit that you have committed a mistake.

There is no problem - the group will understand. We are working as a family, and the group is an accumulated consciousness, so they will understand. And the leader is not infallible, so there is no

need to pretend infallibility. just say that you are as fallible as they; maybe a step further ahead than them, but on the same path. In many things they may be a step further ahead than you, so you have to learn from them.

It is not a teacher-taught relationship. Rather it is a situation in which everybody is learning. The leader is just a facilitator, a coordinator; nothing more. Remember that learning is the point, and learning is possible only if you experiment. Trial and error is the only way.

So don't make rules, mm? Just float.

[The groupleader asks: It comes up in the group that people say I am ego-tripping. Should I just accept that?]

Accept it. To accept the ego is to go beyond it, because the ego is never willing to accept. That's its defence. The ego is always protective and defensive. It goes on always saying that you are not on an ego-trip.

Once you say 'Yes, maybe I am on an ego-trip', it is finished. Then what is the point of the ego?

Then you become defenceless; you accept it. And if you feel that yes, you are on an ego-trip, there is no need to even say 'maybe'. Say 'Certainly I am on an ego-trip - and I am enjoying it!' In that moment there is no ego, because when you accept, the whole game is gone.

The game consists of not accepting. People are saying that you are on an ego-trip, and you say that you are a humble man, the most humble man in the world (laughter). You say that you are not on an ego-trip. You may be. That i the ego - accept it. If you feel certain, accept it with certainty. If you are not certain say 'maybe', 'perhaps'. If you think that you are not on ar, ego-trip, but the other is feeling very happy saying that you are, then let him enjoy it! That is his ego-trip so why be worried about it! Good.

[A group member says: I felt was a lot of fear and disgust for my parents. I feel that I'm still attached to my mother by the cord, and so I can't be myself....

I think it may be the centre of a lot of fears that I have.

Osho checks her energy.]

Very good. I can feel what it ;s.... It will go. This group has been very good, and has brought up many things. Primal (therapy) will be very good.

It is going to help. That is the group that people don't want to do!

It is something to do with the primal pain, some birth trauma, so it has to be relived. Once you relive it you will be relieved of it; otherwise it will persist. There is nothing you can do about it right now.

You will have to move back, move back to the past and relive the moment again - only then it can be released.

When a child is born many things happen.... A child has very instinctive ways of knowing if he is not accepted or not welcomed, of knowing if he was just an accident and could have been avoided. All

these things the child feels immediately and instinctively. It is not that he thinks about them; he simply feels them. They become a constant impact, an impression that continues in the unconscious.

Then you go on growing and thirty years pass. Now thirty years of experiences are covering that experience, so you cannot do anything immediately because it is almost completely unavailable. You have to penetrate those thirty years' experience and go backwards. You have to reach that point where you can be reborn - and this time you accept the fact.

It is not a question of your parents. It is a question of you now - how to accept the fact. Once the acceptance is there, the problem disappears, and you will start flowing. Otherwise this will become a continuous blocking of energy. And the navel is such an important centre that if it is blocked, many things will be blocked, because every energy has to pass through the navel. It is the life source.

So you book for Primal, mm? Once you have gone through it you will be completely rejuvenated, fresh, and you will be able to forgive your parents. And tell (the therapist) before the group. The cord may have to be cut again - it is still there.

[A sannyasin says: When I first came here, I felt an incredible anxiety building up in my solar plexus, and it seems somehow connected with Tai Chi. When I started Tai Chi, it was like an explosion.

I've seen that meditation seems to be of two types and that I can experience my body through here (indicating hara) or here (indicating third eye) and I wonder which I should do.]

Concentrate on the third eye. The japanese and chinese methods concentrate chi energy in the hara and sometimes it can become too heavy. You can become powerful through it. Those methods are meant really for Samurais, warriors; the whole concept of chi is for a warrior. The effort is how to conserve your energy inside a citadel in your being that is not available to anybody else. It is available only to you when you need it, and it makes you tremendously powerful.

My methods are totally different. I am not trying to make you powerful. I am trying to make you peaceful. The energy is not to be concentrated; rather, it is to be dispersed, it has to be flowing. You are not going to fight - you are going to surrender. It is a let-go.

So I can use Tai Chi and other methods, first to concentrate the energy, then to explode it. But explosion remains the aim. First you collect it and then you let it go - but let-go remains the aim.

My effort is not to make you a warrior. Life should not be looked upon as a conflict. that's where the Japanese missed the whole thing, and that's how they became participants with Hitler... the power-instinct. I am against any power-oriented methods. Use them just so that you can collect energy and then have the feel of explosion, of let-go. Have it, but only so you can lose it, because if you don't have it you can't lose it beautifully. A man who has no concentrated energy finds it very difficult to surrender - from where to surrender?

He has no centre, he does not know where he is. If you ask him, sometimes he says in the head, sometimes he says in the heart, and by the time he has said in the heart, he is in the stomach. He is confused. Unless you know who you are, where you are, it is difficult to surrender.

So Tai Chi is good. I am going to use it. Aikido, Karate is good - but not as ends; they are means.

Once you have the energy, then let it flower, let it move to the winds, released, shared, mm?