One day the Lord Vishnu was sitting in a deep cave within a far mountain meditating with his disciple.
Upon the completion of the meditation the disciple was so moved that he prostrated himself at Vishnu's feet and begged to be able to perform some service for his Lord in gratitude. Vishnu smiled and shook his head, "It will be most difficult for you to repay me in actions for what I have just given you freely." "Please Lord," the disciple said, "allow me the grace of serving you." "Very well," Vishnu relented, "I would like a nice cool cup of water." "At once Lord," the disciple said, and he ran down the mountain singing in joy.
After a while he came to a small house at the edge of a beautiful valley and knocked at the door.
"May I please have a cool cup of water for my Master," he called. "We are wandering sannyasins and have no home on this earth." A wondrous maiden answered his call, and looked at him with undisguised adoration. "Ah," she whispered, "you must serve that holy saint upon the far mountain.
Please, Good sir, enter my house and bestow your blessing therein." "Forgive my rudeness," he answered, "but I am in haste. I must return to my Master with his water immediately." "Surely, just your blessing won't upset him. After all he is a great holy man, and as his disciple you are obligated to help those of us who are less fortunate. Please," she repeated, "just your blessing for my humble house. It is such an honor to have you here and to be enabled to serve the Lord through you."
So the story goes, he relented, and entered the house and blessed all therein. And then it was time for dinner, and he was persuaded to stay and further the blessing by partaking of her food (thereby making it also holy), and since it was so late - and so far back to the mountain, and he might slip in the dark and spill the water - he was persuaded to sleep there that night and get an early start in the morning. But in the morning, the cows were in pain because there was no one to help her milk them, and if he could just help her this once (after all, cows are sacred to the Lord Krishna, and should not be in pain) it would be so wondrous.
And days became weeks, and still he remained. They were married, and had numerous children.
He worked the land well and brought forth good harvests. He purchased more land and put it under cultivation, and soon his neighbors looked to him for advice and help, and he gave it freely. His family prospered. Temples were built through his effort, schools and hospitals replaced the jungle, and the valley became a jewel upon the earth. Harmony prevailed where only wilderness had been, and many flocked to the valley as news of its prosperity and peace spread throughout the land. There was no poverty or disease there, and all men sang their praises to God as they worked. He watched his children grow and have their own children, and it was good.
One day as an old man, as he stood upon a low hill facing the valley, he thought of all that had transpired since he had arrived: farms and happy prosperity as far as the eye could see. And he was pleased.
Suddenly there was a great tidal wave, and as he watched, it flooded the whole valley, and in an instant all was gone. Wife, children, farms, schools, neighbors - all gone. He stared, bewildered, at the holocaust that spread before him.
And then he saw riding upon the face of the waters his Master, Vishnu, who looked at him and smiled sadly, and said, "I'm still waiting for my water!"
This is the story of man. This is what has happened to everybody. We have completely forgotten why we are here, why we came in the first place, what to learn, what to earn, what to know, who we are and from whence and to where, what is our source and the cause of our journey into life, into body, in the world, and what we have attained up to now. And if a tidal wave comes - and it is going to come, it always comes; its name is death - all will be gone: children, family, name, fame, money, power, prestige. All will be gone in a single moment and you will be left alone, utterly alone. All that you had done will be undone by the tidal wave. All that you had worked for will prove nothing but a dream, and your hands and your heart will be empty. And you will have to face the Lord, you will have to face existence.
And the existence has been waiting for you; long, long it has been waiting for you to bring something for which you had been sent in the first place. But you have fallen asleep, and you are dreaming a thousand and one dreams. All that you have been doing up to now is nothing but a dream, because death comes and all is washed away.
Reality cannot be washed away by death. Reality knows no death. Reality is undying. Reality is deathless. Reality is eternal. All that dies simply proves by its death that it was unreal, that it was illusory, maya, a dream - maybe a nice dream, but a dream all the same. You may be dreaming of hell or you may be dreaming of heaven; it does not make much difference. The moment you will be awakened you will find yourself utterly empty - and empty in a negative sense, not in the positive sense as Buddhas know it: not empty of the ego, but empty of all that your ego has been trying to do; full of ego, but empty of any attainment, empty of any realization, empty of any knowledge. And it is not that the ego does not claim knowledge; it claims. The ego is very knowledgeable, it collects information. It is a great collector: it collects money, it collects information, it collects every kind of thing. It believes in accumulation. It is greed and nothing but greed; ego is another name for greed.
It wants to possess, but all that you possess will be gone. And all that you have done, you have done in your dream. The moment you will be awakened you will be surprised at how much time has been wasted, at how many lives you have been living in a dream, at how many dreams you have lived.
To be a seeker means to come out of this dream, to come out of this dreaming state of consciousness. To be a seeker means: making an effort to wake up. To wake up is to become a Buddha - to be alert, to be conscious, to be full of light within so that all unconsciousness disappears, so that all sleep disappears, so the darkness of sleep is no more inside you and you are fully awake.
A great astrologer saw Buddha. He could not believe his eyes - that body, that golden aura around the body, those beautiful eyes, as silent as any lake can be, and as deep and as pure as any lake can be, that crystal-clarity, that walking grace. He fell at Buddha's feet and he said, "I have studied astrology, palmistry. My whole life I have been studying types of men, but I have never come across a man like you! To what type do you belong? Are you a god who has descended on the earth? - because you don't seem to belong to this earth. I can't see any heaviness in you. You are absolutely light, weightless. I am wondering how you are walking on the earth, because I don't see any gravitation functioning on you. Are you a god who has descended from heaven just to have a look at what is happening on the earth? a messenger from God? a prophet? Who are you?"
And Buddha said, "I am not a god."
The astrologer asked, "Then are you what in Indian mythology is called a YAKSHA?" - a little bit lower than the gods.
And Buddha said, "No, I am not a YAKSHA either."
"Then who are you? What kind of man, what category to put you in?"
And Buddha said, "I am not a man or a woman."
Now the astrologer was very much puzzled, and he said, "What do you mean? Do you mean you are an animal, an animal spirit, or the spirit of a tree, or the spirit of a mountain or the spirit of a river?" - because Indian mythology is pantheistic, it believes in all kinds of spirits. "So who are you, the spirit of a rosebush? You look so beautiful, so innocent."
And Buddha said, "No, I am not an animal, nor the spirit of a tree, nor the spirit of a mountain."
"Then who are you?" The astrologer was puzzled very much.
And Buddha said, "I am awareness and nothing else. You cannot categorize me, because all categories are applicable to dreams."
Somebody is dreaming he is a man, somebody else is dreaming she is a woman, and so on and so forth. Categories belong to the world of dreams. When one becomes awakened one is simply that principle of awakenedness, awareness. One is just a witness and nothing else, a pure witness.
All clouds have disappeared: the cloud of a man or a woman, animal, god, trees - all clouds, all forms have disappeared. One is just a formless awareness, the pure sky, endless, infinite, vast. This awareness is empty of clouds but full of the sky. This is positive emptiness, this is NIRVANA.
Then there is a negative emptiness. You are full of clouds - so much so that not even a bit of sky can be seen You are full of knowledge - so much so that not even a little space is left for meditation.
It is said: He who knows not and yet knows that he knows, is a fool - usually called a pundit or a scholar; shun him. He who knows not, and knows not that he knows not, is innocent, a child; wake him. He who knows not, and knows that he knows not, is a Buddha; follow him.
To come to this realization: "I am nobody", is the meaning of being a Buddha. Buddha is not the name of somebody. Buddha is the name for 'nobody-ness'. Buddha is not an entity. Buddha is just space, open space, openness, a name for openness, for open sky.
Watch your mind: how much dreaming continues. And it is not only that you dream in the night, you are continuously in a dream. Even while you think you are awake, even in the daytime, the continuity is not broken. At any moment close your eyes and relax and you will immediately see dreams floating. They are always there, like an undercurrent. They never leave you, they are constantly present, and constantly affecting your being. Their existence is subliminal. You may not be alert about them, you may not even suspect their existence, but they are continuously there. Even when you are listening to me, there is that movie continuing, that drama of dreams. Hence you cannot hear what I am saying. First it has to pass through your dreams and your dreams distort it; you hear something else that has not been said. Your dreams distort, your dreams manipulate, your dreams project, your dreams change things.
I say one thing, you hear quite another. And those dreams are very powerful inside you, and you don't know what to do with those dreams. In fact, you have become so identified with the dreams that you don't know that you are separate, that you can watch, that you can be distant, that you can be just an onlooker. You have become too identified with the dreams.
Just the other day I was talking about poor Habib. Now he has become so identified with being a Jungian analyst that he cannot watch what is happening. I had mentioned that, just two days before, I had finished my talk at nine forty-five, and he wrote a letter at nine fifty-five, after just ten minutes. Yesterday he went even further: while I was talking he was writing the letter! While I was discussing him, he could not wait even ten minutes. And that's what I was saying: "Wait a little, be a little patient, meditate over it. You cannot understand these things immediately; you are not in that state of understanding, of clarity, of perception." But while I was talking he started writing the letter.
At exactly the same time, while I was talking, he was writing the letter. Now what could he write?
I had not even talked, I had not even spoken. He must have heard, he must have taken the clue from his own mind. He could not understand a single word. His dream seems to be too strong; he is burdened by his knowledge. And I was saying "Let your Jungian ego drop."
But do you know what happened? Habib died - he renounced sannyas rather than dropping the Jungian ego. That's what he heard. I was saying "Drop the Jungian ego!"; he heard something else.
He heard, "Then this sannyas is not for me. I cannot drop my knowledge; that's all I have. And how can I drop it? How can one put the mind aside? It is impossible! So it is better to drop sannyas." He dropped sannyas. Now Habib no longer exists; he died a very early death. In fact, he died before he was born.
What happened? Could he not see the point?Who prevented him from seeing the point? His mind must have become too crowded. All that he has been reading, accumulating - he has become too attached to it. He had come here to seek and search. What kind of search is this if you are not ready to leave anything of your ego? What kind of inquiry is this?
People usually think they are spiritual seekers if they can add something more to their egos. Your so-called spiritual trips are nothing but subtle trips of the ego. People want more gratification for the ego, more strength for the ego, more vitality for the ego. They want a holy aura around the ego, and the holy aura arises only when the ego is gone; they cannot co-exist.
And it is very rare to come across a teaching which can awaken you. It is very rare to come across a Master who can shake you up into wakefulness, who can pull you out of your long, long deep-rooted dreams. It is a rare phenomenon to come across a Master; it is very easy to miss. It is easy to miss because the basic fundamental of being with a Master is: to put your head in front of him so that he can crush it with his sledgehammer. A Master is a sledge-hammer. People search for a different kind of situation where the Master - they think he is the Master if he buttresses their egos - says to them, "Good! You are a great spiritual seeker."
That's what the late Habib wanted: he wanted me to say that he is a great spiritual seeker, that whatsoever he has done is perfectly beautiful, the right foundation for the temple; that he is almost ready, just a little bit has to be added to him and all would be perfect. That's what he wanted. That is not possible - because first I have to destroy you. Only through your utter destruction is the possibility of your awakening. And destruction is hard, painful.
A great Hassidic saying says: God is not nice. God is not an uncle, God is an earthquake!
So is it with a Master: a Master is not an uncle, a Master is not nice. A Master is an earthquake.
Only those who are ready to risk all, in toto, who are ready to die as egos, can be born. This is what Jesus means when he says, "You will have to carry your cross on your own shoulders. If you want to follow me, you will have to carry your cross on your own shoulders." Kabir has said, "If you really want to follow me, burn your house immediately!" What house was he talking about? The house of dreams in which you have lived has to be utterly burned so that you can be again under the open sky and the stars and the sun and the moon; so you can again be in the wind, in the rain; so you can again be available to nature - because God is nothing but the hidden-most core of nature. God is not a kind of knowledge, God is a kind of innocence. You know God not by knowledge but by becoming utterly innocent.
But it is very difficult for the ego... even to hear these words is difficult. And the ego will immediately distort them, manipulate them, change them, color them, paint them and make them in such a way that they support the ego rather than destroy it.
One story reflecting this observation concerns a man who had an obsession that he was dead. He went to a psychiatrist for help. The psychiatrist used all the known techniques at his command, but to no avail. Finally the psychiatrist tried appealing to the patient's logic.
"Do dead men bleed?" asked the doctor.
"No, of course not," answered the patient.
"All right," said the doctor. "Now let us try an experiment." The doctor took a sharp needle and pricked the man's skin, and the patient began to bleed profusely.
"There! What do you say now?" asked the psychiatrist.
"Well, I will be darned!" answered the patient. "By gosh! Dead people DO bleed!"
That's how the ego functions, the mind functions: it turns things into proofs, supports, food for itself.
The ego is very subtle and its ways are very cunning, and it can convince you that you are right. It will try in every possible way to convince you that it is right and anything that goes against it is wrong.
Remember, the ego is NEVER right! And anything that goes against it - don't miss the opportunity, use that occasion to destroy your ego. The moment you can destroy your ego will be the moment of great blessing, because when you are not, God is, and WHEN YOU ARE NOT, YOU ARE. This is the greatest paradox of life and existence: when you are not, you are.
That's why Vishnu was not willing... Vishnu said to his disciple, "It will be most difficult for you to repay me in actions for what I have just given you freely." Why? Why would it be most difficult?
Because the Master knows that the disciple is still in dreams, he is still in his ego. In fact, the very idea "I want to repay you, I want to do something for you because you have done so much for me,"
is an ego-idea. When the disciple has dropped the ego, who is there to repay? Who? Who is there even to thank? There is nobody. There is utter silence. And in that utter silence the Master is happy:
the disciple has repaid through this utter silence.
A man went to Buddha. He wanted to do something for humanity; he was a very rich man. And he asked Buddha, "Just tell me what I can do for humanity? I have much money, no children, the wife has died, I am alone. I can do much."
Buddha looked at him with very sad eyes and remained silent. The man said, "Why are you silent?
Why don't you speak? You always talk about compassion, and I am here ready to do something.
Whatsoever you say I will do. Don't be worried - I have enough money! Just give me any task and I will do it."
Buddha said, "I understand what you are saying, but I am feeling sad: you cannot do a thing because you still are not. Before one can do something, one has to be. It is not a question of money that you have - but that YOU are not!"
That quality of compassion is a shadow of being, and the being is missing. The ego can never be compassionate. The ego is cruel; even in its games of compassion it is cruel. And when th. ego is gone, even if the egoless person looks to you to be very cruel, he is not; he cannot be. Even his cruelty must be a deep compassion.
When a Zen Master hits the disciple's head with his staff it is not cruel; it is tremendous compassion.
When a Zen Master jumps on his disciple and beats him it is not cruel, because sometimes it has happened that with the hit of the Master, th. disciple has become enlightened - in a single moment, in a single lightning experience.
Buddha said, "You cannot do anything. I know about your money, I have heard about you, but when I look into you I feel very sad for you. You want to do something, but the element that can do something is missing. All that you can do is dream."
That's why Vishnu says, "It will be most difficult for you to repay me in actions what I have just given you freely." That's what George Gurdjieff used to say to his disciples. The first thing that he had said to P.D. Ouspensky was this, exactly this. Ouspensky was a great seeker, a seeker of knowledge.
When he had gone to see Gurdjieff for the first time, he was already a world famous mathematician, philosopher, thinker. His greatest book had already been published, TERTIUM ORGANUM. It is a rare book - also rare because the man was not awakened. How could he manage to write such a beautiful piece? Only an awakened man can see a few faults; otherwise it is very difficult to find any fault in it. It is almost perfect, as if a Buddha has written it.
But when George Gurdjieff looked into the book, he just turned here and there and threw it out of the room. And he said, "All nonsense! You know nothing! And how can you know, because you are not! Before one can know one has to be!" And Ouspensky had travelled all over the East in search of a Master. It is a beautiful story, almost a parable.
He had travelled in India. He had gone to Ceylon, to Burma. He had lived in monasteries, in Himalayan caves. He had met lamas and swamis and many Hindu mystics, but nobody could satisfy him. Why? - because all that they said was nothing but a repetition of the scriptures that he had already studied. Not a single word was their own. Frustrated, he went back, back to Russia, to Petrograd where he used to live. In Petrograd, in one coffee house, he met Gurdjieff. And just the first meeting, and the Master's look at him... and the revelation: "This is the man I have been searching for. This is the town I have lived in my whole life, and this is the coffee house I have been visiting for years, and this man is sitting here in the coffee house! And I have been searching for him in Ceylon, in Nepal, in Kashmir, in faraway places."
The first thing that Gurdjieff said to Ouspensky was, "Unless you are, you cannot know a thing.
Unless you are, you cannot do a thing." And the paradox is that you are only when you have disappeared, when the word 'I' is no longer relevant.
These sutras are the keys to create that state of Buddhahood - when you are just awareness, and nobody; full of light, but utter emptiness.
Master Lu-tsu said: THERE ARE MANY KINDS OF CONFIRMATORY EXPERIENCES.
A confirmatory experience means that you are coming closer to home. One has to understand, one has to be aware of confirmatory experiences because that gives courage, hope. That gives vitality. You start feeling that you are not searching in vain, that the morning is very close by. Maybe it is still night and dark, but the first confirmatory experience has started filtering in. The stars are disappearing, the East is becoming red; the sun has not risen, it is early dawn - it is confirmatory that the sun is not far away. If the East is becoming red, then soon, any moment, the sun will rise on the horizon. The birds have started singing; the birds are praising the coming morning. Trees look alive, sleep is disappearing, people are waking up. These are confirmatory experiences.
Exactly like that, on the spiritual path, there are experiences which are very confirmatory. It is as if you are moving towards a beautiful garden you cannot see, but the closer you come to the garden, the cooler the breezes are that you can feel. The farther away you go, the more coolness disappears; the closer you come, the more the coolness appears again. The more close you come, the more the breeze is not only cool, but there is fragrance too, the fragrance of many flowers. The farther away you go, the more the fragrance disappears. The closer you come the more you can hear birds singing in the trees. The trees you cannot see, but the song of the birds... a distant call of a cuckoo...
there must be a mango grove: you are coming closer. These are confirmatory experiences. Exactly the same happens when you move towards the inner garden, towards the inner source of life, of joy, of silence, of bliss. When you start moving towards the center a few things start disappearing and a few new things start appearing.
ONE MUST NOT CONTENT ONESELF WITH SMALL DEMANDS BUT MUST RISE TO THE THOUGHT THAT ALL LIVING CREATURES HAVE TO BE REDEEMED.
And remember, when confirmatory experiences start appearing, don't be satisfied too soon. The cool breeze has come, and you sit there and you think that you have arrived. The coolness is beautiful, the coolness is blissful, but you have to go far. Don't be satisfied with small things. Feel happy that they have started happening, take them as milestones, but they are not goals. Enjoy them, thank God, feel gratitude, but go on moving in the same direction from where the confirmatory experiences are coming.
And don't be contented with small demands. For example: peacefulness is a small demand, it can be easily attained. The state of a non-tense mind can easily be attained; it is not very difficult. To be happy and cheerful can easily be attained, it is not much. To be at ease, unanxious, without anxiety is not something very great. Then what is great? And what should one keep in mind as the goal?
ONE MUST RISE TO THE THOUGHT THAT ALL LIVING CREATURES HAVE TO BE REDEEMED.
You will be surprised to know that this is the criterion, and this has always been the criterion. In Buddhism it is called 'the principle of Bodhisattvahood'. The closer you are coming to your own inner center, the more you will start feeling the suffering of all beings of the world. On the one hand you will feel very calm and quiet, and on the other hand you will start feeling a deep sympathy for all those who suffer. And there is suffering and suffering and suffering: the whole place is full of suffering. On the one hand you will feel great joy arising in you, and on the other hand a great sadness too that millions are suffering - and ridiculously suffering, suffering for no reason! This is their birthright, to attain to this blissfulness that is coming to you. And don't become satisfied that you have become blissful, so all is finished. If you become blissful, all is not finished, really. Now the journey takes a new turn. When you have attained to Buddhahood, when you have come home, now the real work starts.
Up to now it was only a dream. Now the real work starts: help others to come out of their dreams.
When the disciple has attained, he has to become a Master.
This is what in Christianity is called 'the principle of Christ-consciousness'. Christians have not really been able to understand it; they have misunderstood it. They think that Jesus is the only Christ.
The word 'christ' comes from Krishna. It is a principle. The principle is that when you are redeemed, you have to redeem all. To be redeemed from misery is blissful, but nothing compared to when you start redeeming others from their misery. To redeem oneself from misery is still selfish, self- oriented. Something of the self still lingers, you are only concerned with yourself. And when the self disappears and you are redeemed, how is it possible to stop the journey? Now you have to redeem others. That's why Jesus is called 'the Redeemer'. But he is not the only Christ. There have been many before him, there have been many after him, there will be many in the future. Whoever becomes a Buddha has to become, OF NECESSITY, a redeemer of all.
One's joy, one's peace, one's blessings are small things; don't be contented with them. Remember always that one day you have to share, one day you have to help others to be awakened. This seed must be planted deep in your heart, so that when your Buddhahood blooms you don't disappear from the world.
Buddhists have two words; one is ARHAT. ARHAT means: the person who has become enlightened but thinks all is finished, his work is complete. He disappears. The other is called BODHISATTVA:
he has become enlightened; he does not disappear, he insists on being here. He prolongs himself, to be here as long as it is possible.
The story is that when Buddha reached the doors of NIRVANA the doors were opened, celestial music was played, golden flowers showered, angels with garlands were ready to receive him, but he refused to enter. He turned his back to the door. The angels were surprised, they could not believe it. They asked him again and again, "What are you doing? Your whole life - not only one but many lives - you have been searching for THIS door. Now you have arrived, and you are turning your back to the door? And we have been waiting for you, and the whole paradise is full of joy - one more person has become a Buddha. Come in! Let us celebrate your Buddhahood together."
But Buddha said, "Unless all those who are in suffering are redeemed, I'm not going to enter. I will have to wait. I am going to be the last, let others move first." And the beautiful story says that he is still waiting at the door. The door is open because the angels cannot close it; any moment he may want to enter. That is his right, to enter, so the door is open. He's keeping the door open, and the celestial music continues, and the flowers are still being showered, and the angels are waiting with garlands... and he's standing outside the door. And he's calling people forth; he's calling, challenging, he's provoking. He's telling people, "The doors are open, don't miss this opportunity.
Come in! And I am going to be the last. Now the doors shall never be closed. They will be closed only when everybody is redeemed and enlightened."
This is just a parable, tremendously significant. Don't think of it as history, otherwise you will miss the point. There is no door, no angels, no garlands, no celestial music. And Buddha, the moment he became enlightened, has disappeared. How can he stand and keep his back to the door? Who is there to stand? But the principle...
The energy that Buddha released into existence is still functioning. That energy is still available to those who are REALLY searching. The energy goes on and on working, and it will go on working for eternity.Jesus is no more, but his Christ-consciousness has entered into the new sphere. Mahavir is no more, but his consciousness has entered into this oceanic life. These people have become part of existence; they vibrate. That is the meaning of the parable: they still provoke you, and if you are ready to receive their message they are still ready to take you to the other shore.
The moment a Master dies he becomes part of that infinite energy which Buddha has joined, Mahavir has joined, Zarathustra, Lao Tzu, Jesus, Mohammed. Whenever a Master dies, more energy is redeemed - and it is becoming a tidal wave. So many enlightened people have existed; it is becoming a continuous tidal wave. You are fortunate. If you really long, if you really desire, this tidal wave can take you to the other shore.
Keep it in your deepest heart: don't be satisfied with small things. Many things happen on the Way, many MIRACULOUS things happen on the Way, but don't be satisfied with anything. Remember, you have to become a Christ-consciousness. a bodhisattva - less than that is not going to make you contented.
This is divine discontent.
ONE MUST NOT BE TRIVIAL AND IRRESPONSIBLE IN HEART, BUT MUST STRIVE TO MAKE DEEDS PROVE ONE'S WORDS.
And the life of a seeker should not be that of trivia, because each small thing that you go on doing wastes time, energy, life. The seeker cannot waste. His whole life has to be devoted and dedicated to one single point. He cannot waste here and there: he cannot go and sit in the coffee-house and gossip unnecessarily. He cannot read that which is not going to help. He's not going to do a single thing which is not going to help his journey, and he's not going to collect a single thing that will become a burden later on and will have to be dropped. He remains simple. This simplicity has nothing to do with asceticism. This simplicity is simply scientific: he does not accumulate garbage because then you have to carry it. He remains unburdened. And the greatest garbage is that of knowledge, because all other garbage is outside you: knowledge gets inside. It makes your head very heavy, and the head should be very light.
Have you watched, or have you seen a Japanese doll called daruma? Daruma is the - Japanese name for Bodhidharma. The doll is beautiful. It represents the enlightened man - the daruma doll.
It's beauty is that you can throw it any way but it always sits back in full lotus posture. You throw it - you cannot topple it - it again comes back. Its bottom is heavy, its head is light, so you cannot put it upside-down. It is always rightside-up.
Just the opposite is the case with human beings: they are upsidedown. Their heads are very heavy, they are top-heavy. They are standing on their heads. A man who is knowledgeable stands on his head. He is in a continuous sirshasana, a headstand.
The man who has no knowledge in the head, whose head is empty, silent, is rightside-up. He is in a lotus posture, he is a daruma doll. You cannot topple him, there is no way; he will always come back. You cannot disturb him, there is no way; his undisturbedness remains continuous.
ONE MUST NOT BE TRIVIAL AND IRRESPONSIBLE IN THE HEART...
What is responsibility? Ordinarily the meaning of the word has become associated with wrong things. The real responsibility is towards God and towards nobody else; or, the real responsibility is towards your own nature, and to nobody else. You are not responsible to the society or to the church or to the state. You are not responsible to the family, to the community. You are responsible only to one thing: that is your original face, your original being. And in that responsibility all other responsibilities are covered automatically.
Become natural. And the man who is natural is responsible - because he responds. The man who is not natural never responds, he only reacts. Reactions mean being mechanical, response is non-mechanical, spontaneous.
You see a beautiful flower and you suddenly say something: "It is beautiful." Watch whether it is a reaction or a response. Go deep into it, scrutinize it. What you have said - that "The flower is beautiful" - is it your spontaneous response this moment, herenow? Is this your experience, or are you simply repeating a cliche because you have heard others saying that flowers are beautiful. Go into it, watch: who has spoken through you? Maybe it is your mother.... You can remember the day, for the first time she had taken you to the garden, the public gardens, and she had told you, "Look at this rose. How beautiful it is!" And then the books that you have been reading, and the films that you have been seeing, the people you have been talking to - and they all have been saying "Roses are beautiful." It has become a programmed thing in you. The moment you see the rose flower your program says "It is beautiful," not you. It is just a gramophone record, it is a tape. The rose outside triggers the tape and it simply repeats. It is reaction.
What is response? Response is unprogrammed experiencing in the moment. You look at the flower, you really look at the flower, with no ideas covering your eyes. You look at THIS flower, the THISNESS of it! all knowledge put aside. Your heart responds, your mind reacts. Responsibility is of the heart. You may not say anything; in fact, there is no need to say, "This is beautiful."
I have heard...
Lao Tzu used to go for a morning walk. A neighbor wanted to be with him. Lao Tzu said, "But remember, don't be talkative. You can come along, but don't be talkative."
Many times the man wanted to say something, but knowing Lao Tzu, looking at him, he controlled himself But when the sun started rising and it was so beautiful, the temptation was so much that he forgot all about what Lao Tzu had said. He said, "Look! What a beautiful morning!"
And Lao Tzu said, "So, you have become talkative You are too talkative! You are here, I am here, the sun is here, the sun is rising - so what is the point in saying to me 'The sun is beautiful'? Can't I see? Am I blind? What is the point of saying it? I am also here." In fact, the mall who said "The morning is beautiful" was not there. He w as repeating, it was a reaction.
When you respond words may not be needed at all, or sometimes they may be needed. It will depend on the situation, but they will not necessarily be there; they may be, they may not be.
Response is of the heart. Response is a feeling, not a thought. You are thrilled: seeing a rose flower something starts dancing in you, something is stirred at the deepest core of your being.
Something starts opening inside you. The outer flower challenges the inner flower, and the inner flower responds: this is responsibility of the heart. And if you are not engaged in trivialities, you will have enough energy, abundant energy, to have this inner dance of the heart. When energy is dissipated in thoughts, your feelings are starved. Thoughts are parasites: they live on the energy which is really for the feelings, they exploit it.
Thoughts are like leakages in your being: they take your energy out. Then you are like a pot with holes - nothing can be contained in you, you remain poor. When there are no thoughts your energy is contained inside, its level starts rising higher and higher. You have a kind of fullness. In that fullness the heart responds. And then life is poetry, then life is music, and then only can you do the miracle of making deeds prove your words, not before it. Then you don't only say "I love you", your very existence proves the love. Then your words are not impotent words; they have a soul to them. And to live like that is the only life worth living: when your words and your deeds correspond, when your words and deeds are not opposites, when your words are full of your sincerity, when whatsoever you say you are.
Before that, you live in a kind of split: you say one thing, you do another. You remain schizophrenic.
The whole humanity is schizophrenic unless one comes to this point where words and deeds are no more separate, but two aspects of the same phenomenon. You say what you feel, you feel what you say, you do what you say, you say what you do. One can simply watch you and will see the authenticity of your being.
IF, WHEN THERE IS QUIET, THE SPIRIT HAS CONTINUOUSLY AND UNINTERRUPTEDLY A SENSE OF GREAT JOY AS IF INTOXICATED OR FRESHLY BATHED, IT IS A SIGN THAT THE LIGHT-PRINCIPLE IS HARMONIOUS IN THE WHOLE BODY; THEN THE GOLDEN FLOWER BEGINS TO BUD.
"When there is quiet" - a great confirmatory sign - then "the spirit has continuously and uninterruptedly a sense of great joy". For no reason at all you suddenly feel yourself joyous. In ordinary life, if there is some reason you are joyful. You have met a beautiful woman and you are joyous, or you have got the money that you always wanted and you are joyous, or you have purchased the house with a beautiful garden and you are joyous - but these joys cannot last long.
They are momentary, they cannot remain continuous and uninterrupted.
I have heard...
Mulla Nasruddin was sitting, very sad, in front of his house. A neighbor asked, "Mulla, why are you looking so sad?"
And Mulla said, "Look! Fifteen days ago my uncle died and he left me fifty thousand rupees."
The neighbor said, "But this is no reason to be sad! You should be happy."
Mulla said, "First you listen to the whole story. And seven days ago my other uncle died and left me seven thousand rupees. And now, nothing.... Nobody is dying, nothing is happening. The week is passing by, and I am really sad."
If your joy is caused by something it will disappear, it will be momentary. It will soon leave you in deep sadness; all joys leave you in deep sadness. But there is a different kind of JOY that is a confirmatory sign: that you are suddenly JOYOUS for no reason at all. You cannot pinpoint why. If somebody asks, "Why are you JOYOUS?" YOU cannot answer.
I cannot answer why I am JOYOUS. There is no reason. It's simply so. Now THIS joy cannot be disturbed. Now whatsoever happens, it will continue. It is there day in, day out. You may be young, you may be old, you may be alive, you may be dying - it is always there. When you have found some joy that remains, circumstances change but it abides, then you are certainly coming closer to Buddhahood.
This is a confirmatory sign. If joy comes and goes, that is not of much value; that is a worldly phenomenon. When joy abides, remains uninterrupted and continuous - as if you are intoxicated, without any drug you are stoned; as if you have just taken a bath, fresh as morning dewdrops, fresh as new leaves in the spring, fresh as lotus leaves in the pond; as if you have just taken a bath - when you remain continuously in that freshness that remains and remains and nothing disturbs it, know well you are coming closer to home.
IT IS A SIGN THAT THE LIGHT-PRINCIPLE IS HARMONIOUS IN THE WHOLE BODY.
Now your whole body is functioning as a harmonious unity, your whole body is in accord. You are no more split, you are no more fragmentary. This is individuation: you are one whole, all parts functioning and humming together, all parts functioning in an orchestra of being. Nothing is out of tune - the body, the mind, the soul, the lowest and the highest, from sex to SAMADHI - all IS functioning in a tremendous harmony and an incredible unity.
... THEN THE GOLDEN FLOWER BEGINS TO BUD. WHEN,,FURTHERMORE, ALL OPENINGS ARE QUIET, AND THE SILVER MOON STANDS IN THE MIDDLE OF HEAVEN, AND ONE HAS THE FEELING THAT THIS GREAT EARTH IS A WORLD OF LIGHT AND BRIGHTNESS, THAT IS A SIGN THAT THE BODY OF THE HEART OPENS ITSELF TO CLARITY. IT IS A SIGN THAT THE GOLDEN FLOWER IS OPENING.
Then, furthermore, when all openings, all senses are quiet, not only the mind... Mind is your inner sense; that has to be made silent first. Then there are five senses which are mindfeeders: your eyes, your ears, your nose, all the senses. They continuously bring information from the outside and they go on pooling the information inside, in the mind. When they are also quiet, not bringing anything, they are utterly silent, passive - eyes look but don't bring anything in, ears hear but don't cling to anything heard, the tongue tastes but hankers not for the taste; when all your senses are quiet and the silver moon stands in the middle of heaven - the silver moon represents the feminine principle; when the silver moon stands in the middle of heaven, when all senses are passive, mind is passive and quiet, that means you have attained to the feminine principle of passivity, awaiting.
You have become a womb.
It is a full moon night. All is cool and silent and passive. Nothing stirs. The joy is infinite!
... AND ONE HAS THE FEELING THAT THIS GREAT EARTH IS A WORLD OF LIGHT AND BRIGHTNESS...
And it is not only that you feel it within. When it is within, you immediately start feeling it without too - that this whole earth is a world of light and brightness.
... THAT IS A SIGN THAT THE BODY OF THE HEART OPENS ITSELF TO CLARITY.
You are becoming transparent, clear, clean, perceptive. The feminine principle brings clarity because it is a passive principle. It brings rest, utter rest. You are simply there doing nothing, all is clear, all clouds gone. You can see through and through into reality. Inwards there is silence and joy, and outwards there is silence and joy.
IT IS A SIGN THAT THE GOLDEN FLOWER IS OPENING.
First, it was just beginning to bud; now it is opening. One more step has been taken.
FURTHERMORE, THE WHOLE BODY FEELS STRONG AND FIRM SO THAT IT FEARS NEITHER STORM NOR FROST.
As your silence and joy deepen, you start feeling that there is no death for you. In death only the persona dies, the personality; the essence never dies. When you know something abiding in you, something that never changes - the joy that continues irrespective of conditions - then you know for the first time that something is deathless in you, something in you is eternal. And that moment is the moment of strength, potentiality, fearlessness. Then one is not afraid. Then trembling disappears.
For the first time you look into reality without fear. Otherwise your so-called gods are just out of fear: you have created them to console yourself, you have created them as props for your fear, as protection, as armor. You are afraid; you need somebody to cling to. These are false gods, these are not true gods. Out of fear how can you find the true God?
And the so-called religious people are known as God-fearing. The real religious person has no fear, neither of the world nor of God. In fearlessness a totally different vision of God arises.
THINGS BY WHICH OTHER MEN ARE DISPLEASED WHEN I MEET THEM, CANNOT BECLOUD THE BRIGHTNESS OF THE SEED OF THE SPIRIT.
Now nothing clouds, nothing can overwhelm you and distort your clarity. Your vision remains intact.
Somebody insults you but it doesn't become a cloud. Somebody is angry, you can see through and through: you really feel compassion for the angry person because he's unnecessarily burning in a fire. You shower your bliss, your peace, your love on him. He is a fool, he needs all compassion.
YELLOW GOLD FILLS THE HOUSE; THE STEPS ARE OF WHITE JADE. ROTTEN AND STINKING THINGS ON EARTH THAT COME IN CONTACT WITH ONE BREATH OF THE TRUE ENERGY WILL IMMEDIATELY LIVE AGAIN.
And if you can come in contact with such a man whose inner steps are of white jade, whose inner sky is full of the moon, and whose inner house is full of yellow gold; if you can come in contact with such a man, even if you are dead, you will immediately revive. That is the meaning of the story of Lazarus: Jesus calling Lazarus forth out of his grave. All Buddhas have been calling people forth out of their graves.
I am calling you out of your graves, because the way you have lived is not the true Way. You have become concerned with trivia and you have forgotten the essential. You are just collecting seashells and colored stones on the sea beach and you have forgotten all about the diamonds which are very close by. You are collecting rubbish which will be taken away by death.
I am calling you forth to attain to treasures which no death can take away from you.
Lazarus! Come out of your grave!
And the one who listens becomes a disciple. The one who listens becomes a sannyasin. The one who listens starts moving into the inner world. His journey is totally different from other people's journey: he may live in the world, but he's no longer there. His concern is utterly different.
RED BLOOD BECOMES MILK.
This is the meaning of the famous parable about Mahavir. It is said that a snake, a very dangerous snake, attacked Mahavir, bit his foot; but instead of blood, milk started flowing. Now Jains take it literally, and then they become a laughing stock. It is not a literal message, it is a parable: red blood represents violence and milk represents love.
The moment the child is born, the mother's breasts become full of milk - out of love, out of feeling for the newborn babe. Suddenly her blood starts changing to milk. Suddenly a miracle starts happening in the chemistry of the mother: up to now she had been just a woman, now she is a mother. When a child is born, two persons are born - on the one hand, the child, on the other hand, the mother. The mother has a different chemistry from the woman. The miracle has happened: out of love, blood starts turning into milk. It is symbolic: blood is violence, milk is love.
When a person reaches to this state, all violence disappears. He's all love, love and nothing else.
THE FRAGILE BODY OF THE FLESH IS SHEER GOLD AND DIAMONDS.
And those who can see, those who have eyes to see, will be able to see in the body of the Buddha not fragile flesh, but sheer gold and diamonds. That's why disciples are not believed by others.
Others think the disciples have become hypnotized because they start seeing things which nobody else can see, which are available only to the close disciples. They start seeing, in the ordinary physical body, something else - another body, the body of gold and diamonds, the body of eternity.
This body of flesh is the body of time. Hidden behind it is the body of eternity... but for that one needs eyes to see... and only love and surrender can give you the eyes to see.
THAT IS A SIGN THAT THE GOLDEN FLOWER IS CRYSTALLIZED.
But when one is moving in this inner journey and one can see one's own body as gold and diamonds, then one can be certain that the Golden Flower is crystallized.
First it was just budding, then it was opening, now it is crystallized.
THE BRILLIANCY OF THE LIGHT GRADUALLY CRYSTALLIZES. HENCE A GREAT TERRACE ARISES, AND UPON IT, IN THE COURSE OF TIME, THE BUDDHA APPEARS.
Now you can be certain that the Buddha is not far away, the dawn is close by, the night is over. On the terrace of this vision of gold and diamonds, of the eternal body... as this brilliance crystallizes a terrace arises... in the course of time, the Buddha appears.
One cannot do anything beyond this point. When the Golden Flower has crystallized, when the lotus has crystallized, you cannot do anything beyond that point. Now one has simply to wait: sitting silently, doing nothing, and the spring comes, and the grass grows by itself.
One moment - IN THE COURSE OF TIME - when the spring comes - BUDDHA APPEARS. WHEN THE GOLDEN BEING APPEARS WHO SHOULD IT BE BUT THE BUDDHA?
In the East we have called it Buddha, in the West you have called it Christ - it is the same principle.
FOR THE BUDDHA IS THE GOLDEN HOLY MAN OF THE GREAT ENLIGHTENMENT. THIS IS A GREAT CONFIRMATORY EXPERIENCE.
And when you have seen within yourself a terrace of brilliancy, a crystallized light, and on the terrace of it Buddha appearing; when you have seen the Golden Flower open, bloomed, and on the golden lotus Buddha appearing, you have come home.
This is the ultimate goal. This has to be found. This can be found. This is your birthright. If you miss, only you will be responsible, nobody else. Risk ALL, but don't miss it! Sacrifice ALL, but don't miss it!