Diamonds Regained

The first question:

Question 1:

The first thing: before you can get to yourself, you will have to lose yourself. The child is born in innocence, and if the child never loses his innocence he will never become enlightened.

Enlightenment means that you have lost it and regained it - paradise lost and regained. It is part of enlightenment that first you must lose it.

It is like a fish who has always lived in the ocean - it is impossible for the fish to know the ocean. It is very obvious to those who are standing outside but it is not so obvious to the fish. It has been born into it, it is part of it, it is like a wave. To know the ocean, a little separation is needed, a little distance is needed. The fish will remain unaware of the ocean and will die. But take the fish out, let the fish out, throw the fish on the bank, on the hot sand, and there will be pain and there will be suffering - but in that suffering the fish will know for the first time that she has been living in the ocean. And for the first time a great thirst, a great desire will come to go back to the ocean. And she will make efforts to go back.

And if she succeeds and reaches back into the ocean there will be great joy. She had been in the ocean forever but there had been no joy. But now there will be joy, now she will be thrilled, blessed!

Now each moment will be a kind of ecstasy. And it is the old, the same ocean she was born in. What difference has happened? A new consciousness has arisen. The fish is no longer innocent, the fish is enlightened.

In primitive societies you will not find Buddhas, you will not find Christs. Primitive societies live in the ocean. Innocence you will find, a childlike innocence you will find, an animal-like innocence you will find - but you will not find a Buddha. A Buddha is one who has recognised his innocence. This recognition makes the difference. But to recognise, you first have to lose.

I can understand. Your question is very relevant. If this insane society drives you into neurotic paths, then the logical mind will say then why are the primitives not all enlightened? This society drives you into madness but through that very driving you start moving away from your innermost core.

Suffering arises, and a great desire to come back home arises. That desire is what religion is all about - to come back home.

What the society has done you will have to undo. Religion is against the society, the antidote to society. That's why when religion becomes part of society it is no longer religion. It becomes Christianity, Hinduism, Jainism, Judaism. Then it is no longer religion. Religion is basically against society. It has to be - because society takes you away from yourself and religion brings you back to your own being. It destroys, demolishes, all that the society has done. But before it can demolish, the society has to do something.

So Buddhas exist only in a very cultured society. Enlightened people exist only in a very insane society. It will look paradoxical, but this is how it is.

If you look from this standpoint then you will be rebellious but you will not be against the society.

There is a difference. You will be very compassionate, even towards all this insanity that is created by the society. It is part of the game. It makes enlightenment possible.

Take another example. A man has lived always in health. He does not know what a fever is; he does not know what a headache is. He does not know any kind of illness. Can you imagine him feeling his health? It is not possible. In the very nature of things he will never know what health is. And he is healthy. So to know that one is healthy and the well-being of health, health alone is not enough. One can be healthy, perfectly healthy, and one may not be aware of it - because the awareness comes from the opposite. The awareness comes from a dialectical process. The thesis must be opposed by the antithesis. Health must fall into illness, then you become aware of what you have lost. And if you can regain it there is great joy.

There is a Sufi story....

A very rich man was searching for bliss, for truth - or whatsoever name you want to give to his search. He had much money and he was ready to offer any amount of this money to anybody who could give him a key. He went from one teacher to another, but nobody could supply him with happiness. He was ready to pay any price; that was not a problem at all.

He was carrying a big load of diamonds in a bag and he would put the bag before a Master and he would say, 'Now take this, but tell me the secret of bliss.'

Then he came to a Sufi teacher. The Sufi was sitting under a tree. The rich man came on his horse with his famous bag - it had become famous all over the country - and he put the bag before the Master and said, 'I am in search of happiness and I am ready to pay anything. Here are many diamonds - crores of rupees worth. You can take them, but give me happiness.'

And the Sufi Master did something. Sufis are people who do. Rather than answering, they create a situation. The Master simply jumped upon the bag and ran away!

For a second, the rich man could not believe what was happening. Such a famous Master! And then he suddenly realised what had happened. The Master had gone with his diamonds! So he started shouting and running after the Master. But in that village the Master knew every street every nook and corner. And the rich man was running after him and shouting, 'I have been robbed! My whole life's treasure has been robbed! This is a thief. Catch hold of him. This is no longer a Master. This is a fraud. This man is a cheat.' And he was shouting and running. But he could not get hold of the Master because the Master knew the streets of the town.

The whole town gathered. The whole town started collecting around the rich man and they said, 'Don't be worried.' But he said, 'Why should I not be worried? I have been completely destroyed.

All that I had was in the bag and that man has escaped with it.' And he was crying and he was as miserable as one can be.

Then the whole crowd and the rich man went in search and found the Master sitting back under his tree with the bag in the place where the rich man had put it. And his horse was standing there. The rich man came and jumped on his bag. Holding the bag close to his heart he gave a great sigh of relief and he said, 'Thank God!'

And the Sufi Master said, 'Are you happy or not? This is the key to happiness. Are you happy or not? Tell me.' And the man said, 'Really, I have never been so happy!'

In a primitive society people are innocent. They are like Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. They have not yet tasted the fruit of the tree of knowledge. A civilised person is Adam expelled. He has tasted the fruit of the tree of knowledge. He is no longer innocent, he is corrupted.

But Adam cannot become Christ. That is not possible. You first have to fall to rise, you have to lose to get. Adam prepares the way for Christ. By being expelled from innocence, a new possibility arises - he can re-enter again, he can re-enter the innocence. This second innocence - what Hindus call 'second birth', DWIJ - this second birth, this second innocence, is qualitatively different from the first. The first was ignorant innocence. It was not aware of itself. It was not luminous, it was dark.

The second kind of innoCenCe is luminous. A light burns in it. It is aware of itself. It is not only innocence, it is innocence plus awareness.

So in a way even this insane society does something beautiful to you - it takes away your bag of diamonds. It creates the possibility of being happy. If you are stuck in it then something has gone wrong, otherwise there is nothing wrong. Going away is part of coming back. Go as far away as possible and coming back will be as beautiful as can be. Go as distant from God as you can. The farther you go, the more ecstatic the coming back will be.

So in a primitive society enlightened people don't exist. They exist only in an insane society. That is the first thing.

The second thing: even a primitive society is not really absolutely primitive. In fact, no society can be absolutely primitive. Society as such means that civilisation has entered, even if it is primitive. It may be a primitive civilisation, maybe it does not have cars and roads and aeroplanes - that does not matter. That does not make a society a society.

A society is made out of rules, regulations, taboos, inhibitions. Even in a primitive society they are there. they are crude, gross, as primitive as the society is primitive. but they are there. No society can exist without rules. Society means rules. No society can exist without taboos. Society means taboos. No society can exist without repressions. Society means repressions. Society means that the individual has to ht with the mass. In that very fitting, the individual loses his innocence. He becomes corrupted.

So the second thing to remember is that even a primitive society is a society, so there is some possibility of being enlightened. But the more the society becomes complex, the more there is a possibility of becoming enlightened. The more there is a possibility of becoming insane, the more there is a possibility of becoming enlightened.

Now it will depend on you how you use the situation. A civilised society creates a great possibility.

You can get obsessed, you can get stuck, you can become frozen - that is your choice. Otherwise, the more complex the society is, the closer you are to becoming enlightened. You can use that opportunity.

Buddha was born in a very complex Hindu society. That was the peak of Indian civilisation, the golden age. The society was very complex, very sophisticated. Buddha was born into it. And all the twenty-four TEERTHANKARAS of the Jainas, Buddha, and all the AVATARAS of the Hindus - Krishna, Ram and others - they all came from the very sophisticated layer of the society. They were all aristocrats. They didn't come from the low strata. They were all kings or sons of kings. Why?

Because at that peak the insanity drives you really the whole distance away from God. And then the turning becomes possible.

I am not saying that the turning is going to happen inevitably - I am not saying that. It will depend on you. If you become aware of the insanity that you are living in, you will start turning. If you don't become aware of the insanity and you remain asleep in it, you may continue to remain insane.

It is not an accident that the East is no longer much interested in religion. The East is so poor now and society has fallen so low; it is no longer sophisticated, it is no longer aristocratic. Its problems are very physical, down-to-earth. It cannot think of spiritual problems.

It is no accident that the West is becoming more and more interested in religion. The Americans particularly are becoming very deeply involved with religion - because now America is at the peak of civilisation, of sophistication, of luxury, of affluence. Exactly the same thing happened two thousand and five hun-dred years ago in India, when India was the golden bird - just as America is today.

America is modern India.

The sun is going to rise in the West. The East is deserted. The East is a potential field for communism, not for religion. Eastern countries are by and by turning communist. Communism can only be the religion of the East - it is the lowest kind of religion.

So the American mind, particularly the cultured American mind, is interested in Buddha, not in Marx; is interested in Krishna, not in Marx. But the Chinese mind is interested in Marx, Lenin, Mao. The Indian mind is interested in Gandhi, in Marx, in socialism, in communism. When you are hungry, your religion can only be communism. When your bodily needs are fulfilled, when your mental needs are fulfilled, then there is no way other than to be religious. Then you will start seeking meditation, satori, samadhi.

The second question:

Question 2:

Now you are in fact beginning to be a helper, a therapist. When you start losing that ego of being a therapist, feeling starts flowing through you. That ego is an obstruction. A real therapist does not know that he is a therapist, he is just a medium for God to flow through.

And I can understand why you are feeling scared - because all your expertise and all your past has existed around a subtle ego, around 'I'. Now that seems to be relevant no more. When the past seems to be relevant no more, one feels scared. One is losing knowledgeability and that was your support, that was the ground on which you were standing. You used to know this and that, you used to know how to help, what to do, what was needed... now all that is disappearing. Now you will not know what to do and you will not know the right answer to every question.

But now, for the first time, if you remain available to the patient, your client, the right answer will come through you. It will vibrate through you. It will not be your answer, that is true, it will be no longer your answer - it will be God's response through you.

That's my whole work here. I am preparing a new kind of therapist, a totally new kind of therapist, whose function is not to do something to the patient, but just to be available. Their presence will be a healing presence, miracles will happen through them, but they will not be able to say, 'I have done this.' God will be doing the miracle, or the unknown, or the whole. And for the first time you will be really a help, a great help.

But for a few days, a few months, a few years.... It depends. If you relax into this, surrender into this, this hesitation will disappear soon. If you don't surrender, if you go on resisting, then it will take many months or many years. Or maybe you may succeed in resisting and it may disappear again.

Then you will miss a great opportunity - a door was opening but you didn't allow it to open.

My observation is that when a musician becomes a real musician, he throws away all musical instruments. He need not have them. Now the music arises in his innermost core; it is not produced by any instruments. When an archer becomes a real archer, he throws away his bow and arrows.

There is no need for them. When a healer really becomes a healer, he forgets that he is a healer.

A man of knowing becomes completely innocent, unbur-dened of knowledge. And the process is....

I am not saying that you need not have any training - no, not at all. I am not saying that you need not know anything about psychoanalysis, psychiatry, medicine - I am not saying that. I am saying that you have to know all that and one day you have to forget it too. I am not saying that suddenly a man who does not know anything about archery can become an archer just by surrendering, no.

First one needs to know - that is the first part. One has to learn. Then the second part, and the higher part, is that when you have learned all, forget the learning.

In Zen they say that if a person wants to become a great painter he should first learn painting for twelve years - day in, day out. He should go on learning all that is possible about colours, painting, canvases, techniques, and after twelve years he should throw away his canvas, his brush, his colours, and for twelve years he should forget all about painting. He should never touch it, never talk about it. And then one day he should start painting again. Now the painting will have something original about it. All that is needed as technique is there, but it is no more in the conscious mind, it is no more a part of the ego. It has gone deep into the unconscious. Those twelve years of training, learning, have become part of his blood and bones.

Then for twelve years he has simply forgotten about it. So from the conscious mind all has disappeared. If you ask him anything, he will not be able to say anything. He will not be able to talk about painting any more. Now he will paint like an innocent child who does not know anything, and yet in his painting will be all the expertise of the technician. Now two great things will be meeting in him: the innocence of the child and the knowledgeability of the expert. When these two things meet, there is great creativity.

What happens ordinarily? One can become just an expert, a technician... then you can paint, and you can paint perfectly, but something will be missing. The soul will be missing. The painting will be perfect. Nobody will be able to find any fault, that is true, but that is not enough for a painting - that nobody can find any fault. That is not enough. It is needed, but it is not enough. It is necessary, but not enough. Something more is needed. Just to say about a painting that there is no fault in it, is not praise.

If a poet brings a poem and you say, 'Yes, it is perfectly as it should be. There are no mistakes, no linguistic mistakes, no grammatical mistakes, no mistakes in the rhythm - everything is perfectly okay,' this is not praising it. It may be dead. It has to be dead. Life is not there. It is a corpse.

Everything seems to be perfect but something very essential is missing.

I have heard about a madman who escaped from his mad asylum. He was a professor of philosophy - and a very clever man. When he escaped from the mad asylum, naturally he started thinking about how to avoid detection - because they would be searching for him immediately. All over the country a search would be made. He was a dangerous madman and the police would be looking for him.

So he thought it over. What to do? How not to be caught again? And he found a very, very perfect solution. He knew why people had started to think that he was mad - it was because he used to make such absurd statements. So he thought, 'I should do one thing. I should never make any absurd statements. Secondly, I should make only statements which are absolutely certain, with which nobody can find any fault. I will say only things which are proved by science and I will not say a single thing which cannot be proved. Unimpeachable, impeccable will be my statements.'

So he searched in his memory. He was a great scholar, a very famous professor. He remembered a few statements which were perfect. Nobody could find fault with them. For example: 'The earth is round. Two plus two is four' - things like that. That was his whole conversation. You could say anything and he would say, 'The earth is round. Two plus two is four.' He would say things like that.

He would only say things like that.

Within three days he was caught. He was very much sur-prised. Why? When he was caught he told the superintendent, 'But I am puzzled. Not a single statement have I made which can be proved wrong. Can you prove that the earth is not round? What was wrong in it? How could they detect that I am mad?'

There was nothing wrong in it - obviously, certainly. The statement was perfectly true - the earth is round and two plus two is equal to four. But it is irrelevant! Somebody is talking about his woman and you say, 'The earth is round.' It is irrelevant. It is meaningless.

A technician goes on doing the right things but they have no meaning. He can make a beautiful painting but something is missing - meaning is missing. You cannot find any fault with his colour, you cannot find any fault with his drawing - you cannot find any fault. If you have to find fault you will be not able to. But that is not the point. Where is the meaning? Where is the significance?

Something is missing. The total is missing. It is a mechanical phenomenon. The organic unity is missing. That organic unity comes out of innocence, not out of expertise.

So there are painters who are only technicians. Because of these technicians there was a great revolt in the world of painting. People revolted. They stopped going to the art colleges, they stopped learning painting, and they said, 'We will be free painters.' So they started free painting. Now their painting may be original, it may have some significance, but they are incapable of painting it on the canvas. They don't know how to mix colours, they don't know how to draw. The idea in their mind may be great, but they have no expertise to bring to the canvas. That's what has happened to modern painting. Looking at a modern painting it is very puzzling. You don't know what you are looking at. The man seems to be original but he seems to know nothing about painting.

I have heard....

Once a rich man came to Picasso. He wanted two of his paintings and only one painting was ready.

And the man was ready to give him any amount of money. So Picasso said, 'You wait. I will bring two paintings.' He went in and he cut the painting in two.

Now if you cut Picasso's painting in two, or even in four, it does not make any difference - because it is just a mad jumble of colours. And he sold that one painting as two.

Another story about Picasso....

His paintings were being exhibited and the critics were surrounding one painting especially. His paintings were strange, but that was the strangest he had ever done. And they were really full of praise - like anything. And then came Picasso and he said, 'Who has put it upside-down?' The painting was upside-down!

Or another story....

A rich woman asked Picasso to do her portrait. He did it. He took many months. And he was going to get millions of dollars out of it.

Then the woman came and she said, 'Everything is okay, but I don't like the nose.' So Picasso said, 'Okay. Come after seven days.'

And then he was sitting before his painting, very much worried. And the woman who used to live with him in those days asked, 'Why are you so worried? I have never seen you so worried.' He said, 'The problem is - where have I painted the nose? I cannot find it.'

Somebody can be very technically expert - then the thing goes dead - and somebody can be very innocently, childishly original but then, then again it can't be a real painting. Zen people are right. A painting needs both the innocence of a child and expertise - both together. Then a great synthesis arises.

One has to learn and then to forget - that's my whole approach here. My approach about therapy is the same. This is my approach about everything - that first you have to know, and then you have to forget all that you know. Then the knowing goes into your blood. It becomes an unconscious milieu around you. It goes on functioning from the unconscious. And in the conscious you remain very, very innocent, original. Then there is great joy.

You ask me: BEFORE COMING TO POONA I THOUGHT I KNEW SOMETHING ABOUT HELPING.

NOW I FEEL I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT HELPING. Good! That's how it should be. Now the real helping will start.

THE MOST I CAN DO IS TO BE PRESENT WITH A CLIENT AND FOLLOW MY INSTINCTS AT THAT MOMENT. That word 'instinct' will change soon and you will start feeling intUitions instead of instincts. I can understand why you have used the word 'instincts' - because you don't yet know about the phenomenon of intuition. Let me explain it to you.

When the body functions spontaneously, that is called instinct. When the soul functions spontaneously, that is called intuition. They are alike and yet far away from each other. Instinct is of the body - the gross; and intuition is of the soul - the subtle. And between the two is the mind, the expert, which never functions spontaneously. So there is no corresponding word for the psychological realm. For the physical, instinct; for the spiritual, intuition - but between the two is the mind. Mind means knowledge. Knowledge can never be spontaneous. So there is no corresponding word like intuition or instinct for the psychological realm.

I can understand why you have used the particular word 'instinct'. In the beginning it will feel like that because you are not aware of your soul yet. But good, let it be instinct. Instinct is far better than intellect. Instinct is deeper than intellect and intuition is higher than intellect. Both are beyond the intellect, and both are good.

First one becomes alert about instinct, then by and by one will become alert about intuition. And then there will be a kind of meeting of these two. Then both words disappear; then there is totality, TATHATA. Then one functions as a total organic unit. That is the moment when you become an instrument of God.

The third question:

Question 3:

The question is from Sucheta. She has stumbled upon one thing which is very significant - energy.

That's what we are producing here.

To those who come as spectators, it remains unavailable. Those who come just to see what is happening will not be able to see it. And this is the real happening. But it is invisible. You have to become a participant, only then will you know about it.

There are two ways of knowing a thing. One is that of the spectator. You go to the movie, you sit in your chair and you see whatsoever goes on moving on the screen. You are a spectator. This is one of the problems for the modern mind. The modern mind has become a spectator. Somebody is dancing - you are watching. People are glued to their chairs before their TV sets for five, six, seven hours. The average in America is five hours. It is as if the TV set is their god and they are worshipping. They are just glued. They cannot get up, they are almost paralysed - just watching, just looking. Somebody is making love - people are watching. Somebody is wrestling - people are watching. Somebody is dancing - people are watching. Somebody is singing - people are listening.

People have become spectators.

And when you become a spectator, much is lost. Your life becomes very superficial - because God is not available through being a spectator, God is available only through participation. If you want to know what dance is, dance. Don't be a spectator. Don t go on looking. You don't know what dance is if you only see a dancer. You just know the movements of the dancer, you don't know how it feels from within the dancer - how it feels to the dancer, what joy, what ecstasy, what is happening in the innermost core of the dancer. Great things are happening. If there is a real dancer, great things are happening.

When Nijinsky used to dance, sometimes he would make leaps which were physically impossible.

Scientists could not figure it out. That big a leap was not possible because of gravitation. And another phenomenon was that when he jumped, coming back to the earth he would fall as if he was a weightless feather. So slowly! It had never happened before. It couldn't happen. It should not happen. But it WAS happening. And they were puzzled.

And it did not always happen. If Nijinsky wanted it to happen, it would not happen. The moment he would will it, he would miss. If somebody had come just to photograph him, he would not be able to make that kind of leap. And he would feel very humiliated. It was nothing that he could do. It only used to happen when he used to disappear in his dance. Then by and by he became more aware of it - that when he was not, when the dancer disappeared in the dance, then it happened.

Then suddenly gravitation no longer functioned; it was as if another kind of law started working - levitation. It was as if he started being pulled upwards.

You cannot know it from the outside. You can see Nijinsky jumping, you can watch - but you don't know what is happening inside him. Inside him something like a satori was happening. The West was not aware of these phenomena, that s why nobody told him that this was a satori. Had he been to the East - in a Sufi country, in a Zen country, or a Taoist country - it would have been immediately recognised. And great possibilities would have opened.

Just the reverse happened in the West. Nijinsky went mad because he became so disoriented.

He could not figure out what it was. He became so afraid of it - as if he was being possessed by some evil spirit or something. That which could have become the door to God became a door to a madhouse. He needed a Master in that moment. He needed one who had realised this inner phenomenon. The Master would have been of great help. But he was not aware that he needed a Master; he was not aware that anything religious was happening. He became disturbed. He became afraid of himself.

How can you see what is happening to Nijinsky? I am here. I am talking to you. You can listen to my words but you can't see from where they are coming. You cannot see my heart.

So one way is the way of the spectator. Another way is the way of the participant. Two kinds of people come here. Spectators come; they miss the whole thing. The whole thing looks like a crazy trip. What are people doing? What is happening to these people? Why so much dancing? Why so much singing? Why so much crying and weeping? What is happening to these people? What kind of meditation is this? Spectators come, and they are puzzled. They cannot figure it out.

Only by being a participant will you know what is happening. And if you are a participant then 'energy' will be the word that will become the most important - that is what is happening around here.

Sucheta is right. She has stumbled on the right thing. ONE OF THE KEY WORDS TO ME AND TO OTHERS' EXPERIENCES HERE IS 'ENERGY'. I CAN FEEL IT - SOMETIMES MORE, SOMETIMES LESS - AND I ALSO FEEL THAT OPENING MYSELF MORE TO EXPERIENCING IT, IS LETTING IT DO THE JOB OF CHANGE.

Perfectly true. You will feel it sometimes more and sometimes less, not because it is sometimes more and sometimes less, but because you are sometimes more sensitive and sometimes less sensitive.

The energy is continuously flowing, the river is continuously flowing - it depends on your sensitivity how much you will be able to feel it in a certain moment. It is not that sometimes the energy is here and sometimes it disappears, it is here twenty-four hours. It is going to be here as long as I am here, or, for those who are sensitive enough, it will be available after I am gone. It depends on you.

So when it is flowing less, then watch - you must have become a spectator. Then it is flowing less.

When it is flowing more, watch. You must be a participant - then it is flowing more. So keep it as a key. Whenever it is less, just become aware that you must become more of a participant. You must have fallen into the trap of being a spectator.

That's why I insist that while you are meditating, keep your eyes closed, have a blindfold, so that you don't become spectators. Otherwise the tendency is there. It is so ingrained. Your whole culture has prepared you to become spectators. So even if meditation is happening to you, and you are moving into energy, suddenly the idea arises, 'See what is happening to others.' And you miss. If you open your eyes, a great change has happened: you have fallen from being a participant and you have become a spectator. And this is not a small distance, it is as far away as earth and sky. And then suddenly it is no longer flowing. You are no longer here. If you want to be here, the only way to be here is to be a participant.

And if you are a participant, you need not do the job of change. The energy will do it. Let me do it.

Allow me. It will happen. All that is needed from your side is not to resist. All that is needed from your side is openness, co-operation - a loving co-operation, not a fearful defence. And, yes, you need not bother about change. The change happens very easily.

STILL IT PUZZLES ME. It will puzzle you in the beginning. The puzzling phenomenon comes because you are no longer In control, you are no longer the master of it. You cannot manage it, you cannot will it; it is beyond you, it is bigger than you. That's why it puzzles you. We are always puzzled by the bigger because we always want something which we can define, which we can hold in our hands, which we can possess. Anything bigger than you puzzles you - because the mind feels so tiny. It falls short and cannot figure it out. And once the mind feels 'I cannot figure it out' it starts freaking, it starts getting so frightened that it can start thinking of escaping.

Many people escape from here. Once the energy takes possession of them and things start happening.... And they always wanted them to happen - this is how human mind functions. They came here in the first place for something to happen. If it doesn't happen, they are angry. If it starts happening, they are frightened. Fear and anger are the same energy. Fear is negative anger and anger is positive fear. The difference is only of positivity and negativity. And this is how people are working. If it doesn't happen, they are angry - as if I am not doing it to them. They are not co-operating, that is the only thing. But they are angry at me - as if I am doing it to others and not to them. They go on writing letters to me. That something is happening to somebody else, why is it not happening to them? - as if I am responsible. It is not happening to you because you are not co-operating.

And it cannot happen to you if you are expecting. Your very expectation is a barrier. And it cannot happen to you if you are competitive, if you are thinking that it is happening to your girlfriend or your boyfriend or somebody and it is not happening to you. If you are competitive, it is not going to happen to you. All competition is out of the ego. Then you are angry.

And if it happens, then you become frightened. Then you become so afraid that you start thinking of where to go now and of how to escape from this place - because something is happening which is crazy. It is crazy - crazy in the sense that you don't have any idea of what it is, you don't have any mind to explain it, you don't have any philosophy to make it clear to you.

STILL IT PUZZLES ME, Sucheta says, AS IT IS A TOTALLY NEW CONCEPT TO ME. Right, it is a totally new phenomenon. Don't call it a concept. It is not a concept, it is a reality. It is not an idea. This energy is not an idea. It is the most pregnant force in the world. It is through this force that people are transformed. It is alchemical. It is about this force that alchemists have been talking down the ages. It is this chemistry that transforms the gross into the subtle, that transforms the iron into gold, that changes the lower into higher, that transforms sex into prayer energy, that makes you capable of moving into different planes, higher planes, higher plenitudes. It is not a concept.

But I can understand what she means. she is saying that she has no philosophy to figure it out. But there is no philosophy and I cannot supply it. Nobody has ever been able to supply any philosophy to figure it out. It is so big; philosophies are so small. Philosophies are in the mind of man and this is universal energy. Mind cannot contain it. And you should not try to do that, otherwise the mind will come in and will disturb your receptivity for it.

AND I SHOULD LIKE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT IT. Forget. Knowing more about it is not going to help; being more into it is going to help. And being more into it is the only way to know more about it. Don't do the reverse.

Ordinarily our mind says, 'First know more about it, then go into it.' That seems to be more clever.

But it doesn't work. The mind says, 'First know, then go into it. Without knowing, jumping into it is dangerous, can be dangerous. You may be lost. Or you may not come back again. Who knows?

Whether this is good or bad, divine or devil, who knows? So first know everything about it.' But there is no way to know anything about it without going into it. That is the danger, that is the risk, the gamble.

That's why I call sannyasins the gamblers. They are ready to go into the unknown with me without any hitch or hesitation. I cannot give them any guarantee. It is not possible in the very nature of things. A guaranteed truth is a lie. The truth cannot be guaranteed. One has to go into it with a throbbing heart. One has to take the risk. The danger is there. Either you will become enlightened or you will go mad - that danger is there.

That is why a Master is needed, and a great love for the Master is needed - so you can trust him. So that when things start going out of your hand, he can take them in his hand. If you don't trust him, then madness is going to happen. So I never suggest to anybody to go into this unknown without a Master.

I know that sometimes it happens that a person can go without a Master, but that should be an exception, it should not be made a rule. We can forget about it. Yes, it happens that once in a while a man escapes danger and reaches to truth without being guided. But that should be thought of as accidental; one should not make an ideal of it. It is far better, far happier, far more joyous and celebrating, to go with somebody who knows the way, who has been on the way again and again.

Sufis say that if you want to ask the way to a certain peak, ask the man who comes down and goes up every day. Ask the postman who goes to the mountain peak to deliver the post - who comes every day and goes every day. Ask the man who knows the path so perfectly that he can go with a blindfold, he can go in darkness without any light. Ask that man.

But I cannot give you any knowledge about it. There exists none. Experience is the only way to know it. I can give you an invitation; I can tell Sucheta, 'Come along with me. Drop your resistances - ConsCious and unconscious. Drop your fears. And also drop this mind which wants things to be explained.' There are things which cannot be explained because there are things which are mysterious. And those are the real things. That which can be explained is meaningless; it is trivial, it is mundane. All that is beautiful, all that is true, all that is great, is beyond explanations. It is a mystery. You have to go into it. You have to savour it.

AND I SHOULD LIKE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT IT. It is good that you want to know more about it but the way to know is to be more into it.

IS IT AN INNER OR AN OUTER PHENOMENON, OR BOTH? It is neither - because for energy there is no in nor out. In and out are our divisions created by the ego. It is like your house. You say that this is inside my house and this is outside. Do you think that the sky is divided between the inner and the outer because you have made a small wall? The sky is not divided. The sky remains undivided, indivisible. There is no in and no out. It is one sky. The sky that is inside your house is the same sky that is outside your house. And there is no way to cut it into parts.

And so is energy. It is one vitality, it is one God, it is one life. All is one unto it. It is neither lower nor higher, neither inner nor outer, neither material nor spiritual. All divisions are egoistic. It knows no divisions.

IS IT AN INNER OR OUTER PHENOMENON, OR BOTH? CAN ONE MISUSE IT? No, there is no possibility. You cannot misuse it because before you can get it, you have to disappear. You get it only with the condition that you are not - so who can misuse it? If you are, you never get it. This is a built-in protection. Nobody can misuse it - because before you can get it, you have to disappear utterly. That is a basic requirement. Nobody can misuse God. It is prohibited by its inner mechanism - because before you enter the shrine of God you have to disappear.

And once you are not, who is there to use or misuse? Forget the word 'misuse'. You cannot even use it! It starts using you. You become just instrumental - a passive vehicle, a hollow bamboo. God starts flowing through you. When he starts singing, you become a flute; otherwise you are a hollow bamboo, you remain a hollow bamboo. All songs are his. He uses you. You cannot use, you cannot misuse, because you are no more.

The fourth question:

Question 4:

The question is from Anand Vimoksha. I go on repeating it because although I may be in front of you, you are not in front of me. And unless we both confront each other, unless we are face-to-face, heart-to-heart, I will have to go on repeating it.

Vimoksha, I am in front of you, but where are you? You are not in front of me. You are still hiding; you are still hiding in your cave. You are still afraid to come out and confront me. It is a confrontation, it is an encounter. And I have to go on calling you, 'Come forth! Come out!' That's why I have to repeat again and again, 'When you find a Master.'

The Master has found you but you have not yet found the Master. I have chosen you but you have not yet chosen me, Vimoksha. It has to become your choice too - then there will be a meeting. And in that meeting will be a disappearance of me and you.

The fifth question:

Question 5:

The question is from Hannah.

First, there is no existential humiliation as such. There are only psychological humiliations. And they are created by you.

Existence knows nothing of humiliation because existence knows nothing of the ego. Have you ever seen a tree humiliated? Have you ever seen a rock humiliated? Have you ever seen anybody except man humiliated?

Watch nature and you will be surprised. If two dogs are fighting, they don't start fighting like human beings. They are not so foolish. They first show to each other how much 'I am.' They bark, they jump, they show their chests, they show their teeth. They simply show that this is 'I am.' What you are, you show, and the other shows, and then it is decided - because they are not foolish. There is no need to fight. Then it is decided who is stronger. Then the one who is the weak one shows his back, puts his tail between his legs and goes away.

But there is no humiliation. Remember, if you think that the one who is going away with his tail between his legs is humiliated, you are wrong. You are bringing your human mind in it. It is a simple decision. If I ask you which is bigger - two or three? - and you say three, is two humiliated. Foolish!

Just foolish! They are wise people, these dogs. They have decided without any violence, without any conflict. Just by a mock fight they have decided. What is the point of going into a real fight when it is decided that one is weak? Of course the stronger will win, so why go into it?

The one who has left the field is not a coward, remember. He exposed his whole heart, put everything on the table, was not hiding any card, not even a trump card. Seeing that the other has all the great cards and he doesn't, it is finished. There is no need to fight and there is no need to feel humiliated - 'God has made him a bigger dog and God has made me a smaller dog - so it is finished.'

A man came to a Sufi Master and asked him, 'Why am I not like YOU?' And the Sufi Master said, 'You puzzle me. I can ask the same thing - "Why am I not like YOU?" - and become very humiliated.

I am not like you either. God never makes two persons alike. You are you, I am me.'

A man came to a Zen Master and asked the same thing, 'Why are YOU so pious, so beautiful, so graceful? Why am I not like you?' And the Master said come outside.' And he took him outside and he showed him two trees standing in his garden. One was very big, whispering to the clouds; another was very small.

He said, 'Look, one is big and one is small, but I have never seen the smaller one asking the bigger one, "Why am I not like you?" And I have lived here for many years. There is no problem. The big is big; the small is small. The small is happy in being small; the big is happy in being big. There is no comparison so there is no humiliation.'

Hannah is an egoist. I remember many years ago when she took sannyas. It was not much of a sannyas either. But I never say no. Just out of politeness I never say no. Why should I say no?

She took sannyas at Mount Abu - it must be five or six years ago. When I gave her a name.... I remember the name I gave her; it was one of the most beautiful that we can give in India. I gave her the name 'Ganga'. That is the most beautiful river, the most sacred to the Hindus. And on the sides of this river Ganga has flowered all that has been beautiful in India. The Vedas were written there, the Upanishads were sung there, Buddha talked there, Mahavira walked there. All the twenty-four TEERTHANKARAS, Krishna and Ram and Buddha, and all the great saints - they all owe something to the Ganges, to Ganga.

Hannah immediately refused. She said, 'I don't like this name. My name, Hannah, is beautiful.' Just out of politeness I said, 'Okay, I will keep your old name.' But that very moment, she became closed to me and she has remained closed to me. Since then I have not been able to make any contact.

She refused me! I gave her sannyas, but she refused me. Her own ego and her own name and her own past was too much.

Remember, it is the ego which feels humiliation, it is not existence. Existence has no humiliation.

The bigger the ego you have, the more humiliated you will feel. And remember, the reason is your ego. Existence is completely unaware of any kind of humiliation. The rose is not humiliated before the lotus because the lotus is so big. And the marigold is not humiliated before the rose because the rose has such a beautiful fragrance. Nobody is comparing. Nobody has any ego to compare. Nobody is competing. Existence is pure silence as far as comparison is concerned. It is our psychological cancer, the ego, which feels humiliation.

The second thing: You SAY ONE SHOULD NOT FEEL GUILTY, BUT HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO AVOID IT? THE SLIGHTEST NEGATIVE EMOTION OR QUALITY, IF TURNED INWARDS, KILLS ONESELF; IF TURNED OUTWARDS, KILLS OTHERS. There is no need to turn it anywhere, in or out. You can simply watch it and it disappears, evaporates. It goes neither in nor out.

For example, anger has arisen in you. It is a negative poison. Now there are three possibilities of response. Hannah mentions only two; she knows only two. Many people know only two. One is to throw this anger, this fire and poison onto the other. Then it is destructive. And naturally, after you have burned the other, wounded the other, you will feel guilty. I can understand. You will feel foolish, you will feel stupid, you will feel that you have done something wrong. You should not have done this.

Or the other possibility is that you don't throw the anger on the other, you turn it inwards. Then you hurt yourself. Then you wound yourself. Then you will have stomach ulcers. Then this fire will rage inside you. Then you will always be sitting on top of a volcano. You will never be at ease; you will be always restless. All joy will disappear from your life.

The society, the church, the state, is in favour of the second. The society says, 'Don't be angry with the other. Do whatsoever you want to do with it - swallow it - but don't be angry with the other.' If you suffer from ulcers, that is your business. If you suffer from cancer, that is your business. And the society has given you explanations such that the cancer need not be connected at all with your anger; the ulcer need not be connected with your anger.

If you swallow anger today the ulcers won't appear just today - they will take years. Maybe after forty years of swallowing the anger, the ulcers will appear. And after sixty years of swallowing the anger, cancer will appear. So you will not be able to relate anger with the cancer. You will not be able to find any reason to show that it is anger that has created the cancer. That seems to be so far-fetched.

The society has decided that you should just behave rightly. The society protects the other because the society consists of the other. The society says that you can be self-destructive, that is your business. The society is against murder but it is not against suicide. It is suicide if you turn your negative emotions inwards. I am against both because both will create guilt and both will create complexities.

What is my approach? My approach is that if anger is there - watch. Witness that anger is there.

Don't do anything about it. There is no need to do. Just look at it. And you will be surprised that just by looking at it, it starts disappearing. The cloud sooner or later disperses, is gone. And when the cloud is gone and you have not done anything about it - neither throwing it out nor throwing it in - you will not feel any guilt ever.

And this is how one should relate to all kinds of negative emotions. Be a witness. Just watch it.

Sufis call IT SAHADA - be a witness. Hindus call it SAKSHIN - be a witness. Just watch. Don't do anything. Doing is not needed. All doing is wrong. If you do anything about it, something is going to be wrong - because you will be doing under its impact. If you do it to others, it will be wrong; if you do to yourself, it will be wrong. Anything done under the impact of a negative emotion is going to be wrong. And then later on guilt will arise.

But there is a way not to do - be a watcher, just be a witness. See it. It is there. You are not it, you are the seer. Sit silently when you are angry, when you are jealous, when you are full of hatred.

Close your doors. Sit silently. Let the anger be there, let the anger flash in front of you, let the hatred move like a movie - and you be a watcher.

And you will be surprised. It cannot be there forever, one thing is certain. Sooner or later it goes.

It only takes minutes to go. And when it is gone, it is gone; it leaves no trace behind it. No guilt is created. And a man who does not create guilt is religious. I call a man who does not create any kind of guilt religious.

The sixth question:

Question 6:

The question is from Sheela.

I have not answered it up to now because each day when I wanted to answer she was asleep again!

It is not a new question! I have been waiting. But today she is awake so I thought that this is the moment.

Sheela, can't you recognise my hand when I wake you?