Darshan 2 July 1978

Prem means love, virochan is one of the names of Gautam the Buddha. Literally it means 'the shining one'. Love radiates, love is light. Whenever there is love in the heart, it shines like a sun inside. And it is not only that you can see the light, but anyone who is ready to receive it will be able to see it. And love is true only when it radiates. Then it is a sharing, an overflowing.

Ordinarily what we call love is not real love. We are demanding, we are asking. The ordinary love is a kind of begging - 'Give me, give me more.' The real love says 'Take out of me, take out of me more.' When love gives, it is true; when it hankers to get it is false. And when love gives it radiates, it pulsates.

Man has infinite potential to radiate love. It is inexhaustible, there is no way to exhaust it. People are unnecessarily miserly about it. They think that if they give love, that much is gone. They will have less because so much is gone. That is utter stupidity. The more you give, the more you have; the less you give, the less you have. The person who never gives love becomes loveless; he has nothing. And the person who goes on giving for twenty-four hours a day becomes an ocean of love.

Become love radiant.

Harikant. Hari is a name of god, kant means beloved... beloved.

The full name will mean beloved of god. And everyone is a beloved of god. We are here because god loved us. Just our existence is enough proof that this cosmos needed us. We are not accidental, we are essential. It is not just a coincidence that you are. You are a must. Without you the universe will be very much less. And it is not a question of becoming egoistic, because this is true for all, not only true for you.

A small pebble on the shore or a grass leaf - they are needed in existence as much as the greatest emperor, the president of a country or the richest man. All are needed equally. Existence is immense equality. There is no higher and no lower; there is no hierarchy at all. The smallest grass flower and the biggest one-thousand-petalled lotus are the same. God showers on both equally. For god, the sinner and the saint are not separate; there is no distinction. When the sun shines, it shines on both, and when the moon is there in its utter beauty, it is for both.

Once this idea sinks deep into the heart - that one is not unessential - a great respect for oneself arises, and not only for oneself: a great respect for all too. That's what Albert Schweitzer used to call 'reverence for life'. And reverence for life is real religion - when you respect all and everything, with no idea about who is lower, who is higher, who is great, who is small, with no idea about who is needed, who is not needed. When you respect all with any conditions, that's what love is, what religion is, what prayer is.

Chinta means awareness, contemplation; mani means diamond - a diamond of awareness. And that is the only diamond there is, because that is the only treasure. All else is just illusion, because death will take everything away - it is momentary. One can brag about one's riches, power, prestige, but then death comes and in one stroke all is destroyed. The whole edifice disappears in a single moment and all the great castles that you had made in the air and for which you had sacrificed your whole life are gone forever.

The only real wealth is that of awareness because death cannot take it away. And that is the only thing that death cannot take away, because one can be aware even while one is dying. Dying, one can remain aware. Hence in the East awareness is called the real diamond: chintamani. One who has this diamond is rich. One who has not this diamond is poor, is a pauper.

[A sannyasin, returning to the West, asks if she should take a three year course to be a handicraft teacher. Osho checks her energy.]

If you can manage three years training, it is perfectly good, but my feeling is three years will be too long. And don't you want to come back here permanently? Mm? That will be far better - finish things there and come here!

And all that is there in your energy which you are translating as the desire to do some craft work is:

you want to do something with the hands. The energy wants to move from the head to the hands, that's all. Gardening will be good, farming will be good, working with wood, sculpture - anything with the hands, so the head can be put aside. That's all there is. You are translating it as if it is a need to do some handicraft and teach; but the teaching will again become part of the mind. Whether you teach handicraft or anything, teaching is from the head.

And three years is too long a time. My own feeling is that you go, finish things there, come here, and I will give you some work with your hands. So you become part of the new commune. When are you leaving?

[A sannyasin, just back from the West, says he feels a sense of incompletion about the relationship he finished with his wife two years ago. Osho checks his energy.]

It is just a guilt feeling. Simply drop it. Don't go on carrying it - it is futile. But that's how people live:

they never finish anything, and unfinished things go on accumulating. People remain so involved in the past, that's why they cannot live in the present. One part is hanging somewhere, another part is somewhere else; one part may be still a child, another part has become adolescent, the third part has become young, the fourth part is already old. So man remains a mess, not one piece, and that is the root cause of misery.

And now it is not for you to do anything. The woman has finished with it. Why create trouble for her again? Finish it! Always remember that when something is no more a joy, put a full stop to it, close that chapter..Very few people know how to close things. It is very simple to start a thing - any idiot can do that - but to finish a thing beautifully, gracefully, needs a wise man. So it is rarely that people finish things - everything goes on and on and on, and they are lost in the jungle of it.

It is not love. If it were love I would have told you to approach her again. It is just a guilt feeling somewhere deep down: you are feeling that you betrayed her, that it was not good of you, that you have done something wrong to her and you would like to compensate for it. But you cannot compensate - you can only hurt her more. Don't open the closed wounds again. If it is finished, it is finished. You can be friendly to her but don't start any relationship with her again.

If you do, you will be hurting the woman that you are living with, so you will create more confusion.

Then after two years you will start feeling guilty about this other woman - then it is too late. There are a few people who always arrive when the train has left. They always reach the station when the train is moving out from the platform. Don't be that kind of a person.

If you are feeling guilty you can go to the woman, apologise. Say to her 'I feel a great desire to apologise.' That's all... that's all that I feel in your energy. And this can't create any relationship. If because of guilt you create a relationship, soon you will start taking revenge on her, because it is because of her that you felt guilty and you got into this mess again.

These are vicious circles. Just a good apology will do. You can cry and weep and you can say 'Forgive me - I was not up to you.' But what is finished is finished, and it is never good to cry over spilled milk....

[A sannyasin had previously written to Osho about her alcohol problem. She says she wants to be drunk on Osho instead. Osho checks her energy.]

You will get drunk on me - don't be worried, mm ? And it is very easy to drop your alcoholism... it is not a problem. It is just an old habit - there is no need in your energy. And it has not got into your system at all. It is just an old habit; one can go on doing it mechanically. When it gets into the system of a certain person then it is difficult to stop it - it becomes a chemical need. It is not so in you; your energy is completely free of it.

So simply stop it. Don't think that you have to stop slowly slowly; from this moment forget all about it. And for a few days, when doing nothing, sitting alone, the idea will come, but don't be worried about it. Dance, sing when the idea comes, and then in six weeks it will be completely gone. But don't go on prolonging that habit. It is utterly useless, and not only bad for the body but bad for the spiritual growth - and that is the real thing to be considered.

And whenever you feel that the desire is too much, you can ask for a darshan and just sit there and I will make you drunk!

[A sannyasin, who is leaving, says he doesn't know how to show his parents that he loves them... or anyone else. Osho checks his energy.]

You do one thing - it is possible, more so, because now you are a new person: when you go back, make it a point that everybody feels that the old person is dead. You are a sannyasin now, with a new name, with a new identity, with a new vision and a new style of life. It is very difficult to change an old person - that is kind of renovating an old building. It is easier to make a new building. If you were going just as you were of old, it would have been very difficult for you to bring about such a drastic change in your pattern.

You have never shown love. You have always been shy of showing love. You have always thought that showing love is a kind of weakness. You have been strong, hard, independent. Love makes you feel dependent, because love is a need. You have tried to live on your own, as if you don't need anybody, but that is utter nonsense. Even god needs the existence. He cannot be without it; he will be very poor without it. We are all interdependent. Existence is a kind of interdependence. Nobody is independent and nobody is dependent either.

But from your very childhood you must have got the idea that to show love is girlish, feminine - one has to be a man, hard, strong, of steel. And you have managed. You are carrying an armour around you; you are always surrounded by a kind of China Wall; nobody can penetrate you. But then you will suffer, because you are imprisoned in your own idea of protection and safety, of independence.

Now it is possible to change. Just go and tell them that you have changed completely, you have dropped the old pattern. Now you feel you are interdependent. Now you feel that love is a need, a must, and that the people who don't love are dead. And now you have taken something of the East into you - that's what sannyas is. So when you go, touch the feet of your mother, your father. They will be shocked and surprised, but tell them that this is the way a sannyasin is supposed to act. Start by giving respect and then things will start happening.

It is really the first thing - how to start - that is important; then things follow. Start by touching the feet of your father and your mother, and if while you are touching their feet, you feel like crying, cry. Become a child again, and they will be immensely happy. Maybe for the first time they will be* shocked a little - what has happened to their child ? Because they expect you to be just the old; you are not. And then don't stop there. Meditate, sing, dance, hug them, talk to them. Tell them about me and what has happened here; invite them to come here some time.

Now you have a message too - you have something to convey. Take the books, take the tapes, the music tapes, put the music on, start dancing. Forget all that nonsense that you have been carrying up to now. It is only a question of how to start anew. And my feeling is that if you touch their feet and tell them that now you are no more the old person, if you tell them your new name and tell them that the old is gone, things will start happening. One thing leads to another. If you really want it to happen, it will happen.

And it is worth trying, because there are millions of people who have not loved their parents, and when their parents die they suffer their whole lives with the guilt, because now there is nobody even to apologise to and no way to put things right. The father is gone, the mother is gone, and now you will not be meeting them again. They did so much for you and you have not even thanked them.

And in the West it is really becoming ugly, it is taking on ugly proportions.

You go - I will make it happen. But you start by touching their feet... and that will be the beginning.

They will be shocked and they will ask 'What has happened and what are you doing ?' Then things start; tell them. Be a child again. If you cannot bow down to your own parents, where can you bow down?

You have a very very loving heart - just a hard crust around yourself. Once that love starts flowing you will not know how to stop it... and there is no need to stop it either. And why should it stop with your parents? It should spread to everybody you come in contact with. And remember: if you cannot show love to one, you cannot show love to anybody else, because it is the same process.

If you can show your love to your parents, you can show your love to your wife, your children, your friends - it is the same process! If you cannot show it to your parents, you cannot show it to your children either.

We go on repeating the same pattern. Your children will not be able to love you and will not be able to love their children; that's how diseases go from one generation to another generation. Break it!

This whole thing has to be stopped.

Be a child again and do things that you always wanted to do and have not done - laugh, dance, sing before the parents. At the most they will think that you have gone crazy. So what? Your orange, your mala, will already prove that you have gone crazy.