Anand vipal - bliss moment.
And remember that the moment is the penetration of eternity into time. The moment is not part of time; the moment is something that comes beyond time. In fact, the real moment is between two moments of time. It is just as these two fingers are there and there is a gap. One second passes; another has not come yet, is just coming. Between the two is the vipal, the gap between two time moments. And that gap is from eternity. It has not time in it... it is timelessness.
That is where one finds bliss, that is from where bliss enters your being. Bliss is transcendental to time. Time is misery, time is hell. Time is madness, because time is a constant hurry - rushing somewhere, not knowing where exactly, but rushing... trying to reach something somewhere in the future. Time is desiring.
In the moment, vipal, there is no time and no desire. And one is not going anywhere. One cannot go... there is no space to go. It is just a gap between two moments. And there is your home. There is what we call samadhi - the ultimate in meditation. When time disappears, the mind also disappears with it, because the mind can exist only in time.
And these moments, these vipals come. Even in ordinary existence they come. Sometimes making love to your woman that gap comes. Suddenly time disappears. All desiring disappears. You are utterly contented in that moment: you are not going anywhere, you don't want anything. You are not a beggar in that moment. You have all! Or sometimes looking at nature or listening to music or just sitting silently not doing anything, those moments come. They cannot be brought. At the most we can invite them and wait for them, but we cannot manufacture them, we cannot order them. We cannot even expect them and we cannot earn them.
We can never be in a state where we can say 'I am worthy of this moment' - no, never. They come out of the blue. They come suddenly; they always take you unaware. Hence the beauty, because they are so unexpected. They suddenly knock at your door. The world disappears and you are transported into another dimension.
Yes, those moments sometimes happen in drug trips too, hence the appeal of drugs... through alcohol also, but that is forcing your body chemically, coercing your body chemically. That is a kind of rape on the body chemistry. Rape can look like love but it is not. Yes, physiologically the same phenomenon happens when you rape a woman, but spiritually there is as much distance as is possible.
When you make love to a woman it has a totally different quality to it. You are not doing anything really; it is happening. It is not that you are making love to the woman; the language is wrong. It is not the vice versa - that the woman is making love to you; that too is not true. You are both engulfed, encompassed, by something called love. A climate called love, a cloud called love has possessed you both. You are not doing anything; you cannot do anything. It is happening... it is raining on you.
You are both bathed in it but it is something from the beyond. It is a gift from god.
Through drugs we can rape our body chemistry but that is foolish and stupid. I don't say to be on a drug trip is to be a sinner. I say it is simply stupid, it is simply foolish. It is a mistake, not a crime...
but a great mistake, because the more one gets accustomed to these moments of rape, the further away love will become. One will forget the language of love. Love is persuasion, never coercion.
So these moments come in ordinary life too. One has to watch out for them and one has to learn the knack of how to invite them. I call it a knack - it is not an art; it is far more subtle than art. And it is not a science at all. Nobody can teach it to you. You will have to learn, you will have to be observing continuously. When these moments come you have to be a witness and you have to see what is happening all around. Why has this suddenly come? What have you done? How have you accidentally stumbled upon it?
If you are looking at a sunset and somebody is playing on the flute, watch the whole that is outside and inside and try to find the knack of it. After watching many moments of this joy you will know the knack and you will never be able to express it to anybody. It is beyond language, and it is so individual that your knack will not be of any use to anybody else either. It will be utterly yours; it will be something personal. It is your direct line to god; it is nobody else's direct line. That is the way you connect with god and god connects with you. There is no other you and there has never been any other you and there will never be. Once you are gone, that direct line will disappear with you. It comes into existence when a man is born.
That is called 'vipal'. It is of great significance, the word. 'Pal' means moment and 'vipal' means the gap between two moments, just the gap. It is so small that it cannot rightly be called even a moment. It is just a meeting place of two moments, just a boundary line that divides two moments.
One has to be very very alert; only then can one see this gap. And you will be able to see - just go on watching....
[A sannyasin, returning to the west, says that she doesn't think she can make it alone; she needs somebody to help her.... ]
That's true! I am there! No need to go there alone. I will be there to the very end with you! Just don't start fighting and arguing with me, that's all! If you can go on saying yes, there is no problem.
[She says she has been alone a long time; that's why she is always fighting.]
Now you will not be - I will not leave you alone anymore. And you cannot fight with me either, because my presence will not take your aloneness or your freedom from you. It will enhance it. It will make it beautiful... it will make it an ecstasy.
People who have lived alone for long are naturally afraid. They fight. They are afraid because if they relate and go into any relationship too deeply their freedom and their aloneness will be lost.
Because aloneness is not only aloneness - it is freedom too. But with me there is no problem: I never encroach on your boundary.
I will only give your aloneness the quality of a song, music.... And now you are not alone on the path.
[A sannyasin couple are present. The woman has just returned from the West. The man says he had more energy and was dancing while she was away: Maybe I should be doing dancing and active meditations every day, because the energy just stays inside me and goes bad.]
[Your girlfriend] is not preventing you from doing those things, mm?
This is very simple.... If you love a woman or a man, then being together naturally a routine is created, things become routine. You start moving in a circle, and the joy of being related to the other by and by is dissipated, disappears. So if one has gone away for a few days you will feel real freedom. That simply shows that you love her - nothing else. If you had not loved her there would have been no problem. If she were here or gone away would not have made much difference.
If you love a person, only then do you start being heavy on each other. And it is natural; you cannot avoid it right now. It can be avoided only when you have become very very conscious of things, otherwise not. She went away; you felt a kind of relief and you had more time and more energy.
But if you drop her or you drop out of relationship, you will not enjoy your dancing anymore. You enjoyed it because she had gone! If you drop out of relationship, within a few days your meditation and your dancing will become just like [your girlfriend]. That will be your relationship then. Soon that will become a routine and you will start hankering to find a woman. When you meet a woman you will be relieved of the meditation and the dancing. That's how the mind goes on.
So there is no problem. Your relationship is going so beautifully. There is no need to create some trouble in it. Learn one thing: sometimes it is good to be on holidays from your relationship, that's all. That is the lesson to be learned - not that you have to drop out of relationship.
So sometimes manage it that [your girlfriend] goes away for a few days and you go for a few days, and that is perfectly good. In fact, that should be done very very knowingly. After two, three months for three, four days, be separate. There is no need to go anywhere - just be here but be separate.
For four days don't see each other. It is good - it brings appetite again - and nothing is wrong in it.
But dropping out of the relationship is not going to help.
You will not find that joy again, because that depended on [her] going to London. It had nothing to do with meditation and dancing. It had something to do with her going. A burden disappeared; you felt free. You felt that now you are not to take any responsibility, any care of anybody, that you have not to look to [her] for what to do and what not to do, that you need not have any orders from anywhere; you are perfectly independent. So you enjoyed! But that independence cannot last long; soon it will become a tyranny.
This is to be understood - that people are such that they cannot live together and they cannot live alone either. When they are together they think about aloneness, the beauties of aloneness, the joy of aloneness, the silence of aloneness. All kinds of poetry arises in them about aloneness. When they are alone, they start thinking about the joy of love and the relationship and the ecstasy of it.
That's how the mind works: whatsoever is the case it tends to forget; it thinks about the opposite.
Watch this duality of the mind and by and by go beyond it. Then you can be in love and alone.
And [your girlfriend] is becoming very very understanding; she will help you in every way. People who are around me here are changing tremendously. Their insight is growing deeper. They are becoming more understanding and more compassionate. And by and by you will see here relationships flowering and yet nobody trespassing on anybody's being.
When one can be alone and yet in relationship that is the highest synthesis - the synthesis of love and meditation. It is very simple to meditate, it is very simple to love; nothing much to brag about, a very simple phenomenon. The real poetry arises when love and meditation go together... when love enhances your meditation and meditation enhances your love.
So good. (to the woman) It is a good insight, mm ? - just give him a little more rope!
[A sannyasin says that words cannot communicate what he wants to say. Osho checks his energy.]
Words are inadequate. When you really have something to say they are always inadequate. When you have nothing to say they are very adequate....
Knowing this, one can do two things: either one can become a poet or one can go into silence. And my suggestion is that to go into silence is negative. The positive is to become a poet. Knowing this - that words cannot say much - try to say through some other means. Poetry is that. What prose cannot say, poetry tries to say.
Poetry does not depend on words. It uses words but it doesn't depend on words. It is as fire comes out of wood but is not wood; it is the same with poetry. It comes out of words but it is not words. It is not wood - it is fire. The beauty is that the fire comes out of the wood and consumes the wood finally. And it is the same with poetry: it comes out of words and consumes the words finally. Only silence is left, but not a dead silence - a singing silence, a silence with the throb of life, a silence full of music and harmony.
Knowing this - that words are inadequate - become a poet, become a painter, because these are the ways to say without words. Become a musician, because music is the ultimate in saying things without words. The other way is: become silent, don't say anything. But that is very uncreative. The east has chosen that and suffered much.
If one feels that there is no possibility of being positive, then it is okay, but first try. If you think words are foolish - and they are - then only these two alternatives are left: either keep quiet, don't say a thing, or say things knowing well that words are inadequate so they should not be taken very seriously. They should be used as a vehicle - as fingers pointing towards the moon. That's what poetry is... and I am in immense love with poetry. Become a poet!
[The sannyasin says: Before I was aware of you I was a painter, but this interest and this fire for you... The painting has dropped.]
It will come again and it will come with a new vitality and with a new message. It has not gone out - it is just waiting for- the right moment to come back. It will come. No need to force it; just when it comes welcome it, embrace it. It will come.
Because my whole approach is creative. My whole approach is that we participate in god by being creators - in whatsoever way. Maybe you are a potter; you just create pots. That's okay: god is a potter too! One should worship god through creativity. One should offer one's whole being in creativity.
Prayer should not be impotent. Prayer should be a real effort to offer whatsoever you have to god...
whatsoever you have. You can paint; then that is your prayer. You can dance; then that is your prayer. And there is no other prayer. Other prayers are just impotent.
It will come - it is waiting right now. And it is good that it dropped for the time being, so the continuity will not be there. It will be something new this time, mm ? It will erupt as something absolutely unknown to you.
Then it will have the joy and the wonder and the awe of something unknown. It will possess you one day....
[A couple, newly returned from the West, are present. The man says that whenever he has to deal with authorities - for example to get a visa - or even see a policeman, he feels tense.]
I understand. The world is run by fools, and it is very difficult to live in it. The more wise you become, the more difficult it is. The more intelligent you become, the more difficult it is, because then you see the whole nonsense that goes on... for no reason at all. Nations are no more needed, boundaries are no more needed. The earth has become such a small village... and we all belong to this earth, so why distinctions, why divisions and why passports, why visas? But the world is run by fools, and the fools are very powerful. Only fools seek power, so the more foolish a person is, the higher he will rise because the more stubborn he will be.
And their whole game depends on these things: nations, religions, churches, politics, ideologies; their whole game depends on these things. If all these disappear then where will be your prime ministers and your presidents and your police and your magistrates ? They will be just meaningless, irrelevant. They are irrelevant! They are out of date. They should be finished by now but they have the power so they go on persisting. They go on creating wars, conflicts, and they go on destroying humanity.
It is difficult. When you start understanding things it becomes more difficult. When you are also a fool and live in a stupor there is no problem; you think everything is going perfectly well. Nothing is going perfectly well - everything is going wrong and everything has been going wrong down the ages. Man has not yet found a civilised world. Civilisation has not yet happened - it is just a word.
How can a Christian and a Hindu be civilised? And how can a Mohammedan and a Christian be civilised? And how can Indians exist in a civilised world... and german and dutch and english and americans; how can they exist ? These things are so foolish and so childish! So many flags and so much antagonism and ego. That simply means that the world is still not civilised, still not cultured. It is a very very stupid world but there is nothing you can do right now to change it.
When you cross the boundary of a country then you become aware that you have been living in a prison. You only come to know when you cross the boundary. Then you know that the prison is a big prison. But you are a part of a prison; it is not a country. No country is yet free because a single country cannot be free: either the whole world can be free or not. These are just small or big prisons.
Inside the prison you don't become aware because you are free to move. You can go from Poona to Bombay and from Bombay to Delhi so you feel you are free. But just try to go from Calcutta to Dacca and there will be problems, or from Bombay to Karachi, and the problem. Suddenly you find that there is no respect for you, for your freedom, and petty officials start tyrannising you. They enjoy it - that is their power.
They can destroy you. They can say no to you. They enjoy the trip of being authoritative, authorities, and the whole game is based on stupidity. But right now you cannot do anything. You have to live with these fools and in such a way so that you don't start fighting with them; they are powerful and they are in the majority.
Sannyas is just the beginning of a civilised humanity. My whole effort here is to create a miniature world in which no distinctions exist. Nobody bothers whether you are a catholic or a protestant, hindu or a mohammedan, indian or a german - nobody bothers. And by and by a point has to be reached when you are not even bothered about whether you are man or woman... because those are also distinctions.
When you see a human being as a human being, when no caste, creed, sex, ideology, country, divide, then for the first time you become a human being. Then you have a vision, a perspective, in which truth can happen - not before it. But we cannot fight, because if we start fighting our whole energy will be lost in that. That's why I am not a fighter: I know that that is pointless. All that energy that I have got or the time that I have got has to be used creatively to create a few human beings, to create a small human community. Then they will function as seeds.
It is a very slow thing, it will take hundreds of years for the earth to become civilised, but we should start. Even if we can make a few people civilised... And the whole earth will be against you.
Wherever I am, people will be against me because deep down I am cutting their roots. Consciously or unconsciously they are feeling it - that something is going on which can take away the very earth beneath their feet.
So no country will be a support to me. No politician will be a support to me, no religious organisation will be a support to me. I have to depend upon rebellious individuals. But the rebellion has to go so silently that we don't come in direct conflict with any nonsense, because that is destructive to our energy.
So don't be worried about it; it is so. Just make ways so that you don't get caught in any trap. Just that much alertness is needed.
[The sannyasin says that perhaps he does not trust himself enough.]
No, nothing, just the foolish situation all around. Nothing to do with you... nothing to do with you.
And there was a deep longing for me so the fear arose as to whether you would be able to come back or not. They can create situations - they can stop people coming to me. They do whatsoever they can do.
[The gestalt group is present. One participant says she was beaten in the group and wanted to defend herself but couldn't because of a burning pain in her head and chest. She has the same feeling of exploding in her chest during Kundalini.]
That has created your headache and the burning sensation: you really wanted to fight but somehow you managed not to. You were not true to your feeling - hence the headache and hence the feeling that you wanted to explode and something was holding you.
Next time, go with the feeling. Nothing is wrong in defending yourself: it is very natural. When others are attacking you, you have to defend yourself. If you don't you will become a buddha! So beware!!
[The sannyasin says: I would like to be a buddha!... I really have the feeling of being a killer.]
This is there, so first go through it otherwise you will remain a killer. You can pretend and sit like a buddha under a tree; that won't do. You should listen to your feelings. If you were feeling like defending, you should have defended yourself. You would have felt very very relaxed, and there would have been great joy, because whenever you go with your feeling wholly, totally, there is harmony.
Now, your being wanted to do one thing and you pulled back. That's why the headache and that's why the feeling that something is not exploding and wants to explode. You missed a moment. And I am not saying that you have to defend yourself whether you feel like it or not. If you don't feel like defending and then you defend, again it will be untrue. No, if you don't feel like defending then it is perfectly okay. You should lie down there and let them beat you and enjoy it! You don't want to defend so there is no problem. You would have enjoyed that too!
Joy always comes when you are true to your feeling. Misery arises - not only mental but bodily problems and illnesses can arise - if you are not true. Then you are creating a kind of conflict within your being: one part wants to do this, another part goes on holding it. It is as if you are accelerating the car and braking it also; you will destroy the whole mechanism. If the engine becomes hot it will be perfectly natural. You accelerate and you go on braking it. You don't allow it to go fast and you go on accelerating. The engine will become hot because the engine will be confused. The engine will not understand. 'What are you doing? Are you mad or something?'
That's what happened to your head. You wanted to fight, you really wanted to hit back hard, and somehow you managed not to do that. You thought it was wrong, you thought it was not good. Next group go totally in it. Nothing to be worried about.
One day it will happen that you will not like hitting back. You will lie down there enjoying their beating. Then those beatings will fall like flowers on you. There will be joy in that, because your whole vision will be different. There will be no fight, no defence; you will simply absorb the energy.
When somebody hits you he is throwing energy at you. If you can absorb it he will soon be tired.
That is the whole secret of judo. By defeating a person, not by fighting with him, the judo expert will simply exhaust you, provoke you to hit him, and will not do anything. He will simply absorb the hit.
Energy will go on jumping from you to him and he will go on absorbing it. Soon you will be weak:
you will hit him and you will fall down because that hit will be too much. He will be standing there laughing and enjoying - fresher than he was ever before, more vital than before, because he has absorbed your energy....