Darshan 25 March 1978
[A sannyasin, who is returning to his job as a therapist in the west says: I fear really giving a lot of energy and never getting any of that love back. It's something I realise that I really need since I've been here.... What do I do?]
Go with this new understanding and try to live in the new way. Don't fall back into the old pattern.
And don't be worried about whether anybody is responding to your love or not; go on loving. It will not be long before people start responding; love cannot go in vain. But don't think of returns at all. If you think of returns from the very beginning, then you become hesitant, you become miserly.
You start thinking, 'What is the point? I will give love and nothing will be returned, there will be no response and it will be lost.' Nothing is lost... never!
All that you give is bound to come to you, is bound to rebound, sooner or later. Remember that, it is one of the most fundamental laws of life, it can't be otherwise. Maybe it takes a little time: if people are very insensitive it takes a little time for them to understand your love, to respond to it, to be loving. Or maybe people are very afraid of love, so when you give love rather than opening up towards you, they close, they become afraid. They are afraid because in love they will be vulnerable; they don't want to come that close to anybody. They have learned in life that whenever you come close to somebody you are being cheated, deceived.
But don't be worried - go on giving love, and soon you will see that things have started happening:
one response, then another, and then more and more responses start coming; then all explodes on you.
I know that one needs the feedback, mm? otherwise one feels as if one is alone, just shouting in a wilderness. But wherever people are, they can't be so insensitive that they can go on being non-responsive to love forever; no, that is not possible. Nobody has a heart of a stone. Even stones
don't have that kind of a heart. If you go on pouring love on a rock, sooner or later the rock also responds, starts singing a song to you, becomes soft towards you. It shows its heart to you, it has a different vibe and a different texture for you. Try it!
Never be hopeless about love, because love is the only hope. And make it a point to go on giving whether the feedback comes or not, and you will be surprised that it does come... delayed, maybe, but it comes. Sometimes when it is delayed it is a surprise because you had completely forgotten about it; you had thought that it is lost. But one day suddenly it knocks on the door: it is there. It is a surprise; you cannot find from where it is coming because you have completely forgotten what you have done.
So let this situation be a challenge to your love, and whenever you feel too depleted, come back; just be here for a few weeks and go. And finally you have to be here permanently, mm? - this is just for the time being, coming and going.
Keep this (a box) with you. And when nobody responds, just put it on your heart: it will respond!
[A sannyasin, returning to the West, says that during the couples group she experienced Osho's presence and love very strongly, while she was reliving her birth trauma. She realised she had a great resistance to life, and now she feels transformed.
Osho confirms now that he was indeed with her then.]
It will happen again and again and again, even in America it will go on happening, because once you are in love with me space makes no difference. Wherever you are, on this planet or on some other planet, it doesn't matter. So don't be afraid if it happens there; it will be happening.
Love makes impossible things possible; love is magic. And because we have forgotten the language of love, we have fallen out of the magic of life. Otherwise everything is so magical, so miraculous.
Each and everything is a miracle here but we have become so dull and insensitive that we go on living as if this is nothing. People go on dragging themselves in such a beautiful life. It is such an immense gift but they go on wasting it. They are always full of complaints and grudges and they are always talking as if everything is wrong. Nothing is wrong, nothing has ever been wrong, nothing can ever be wrong. That is the meaning when we say that god exists: it means that nothing is wrong and nothing can be wrong.
Once we start loving and saying 'yes', new doors open; doors whose existence we had never even suspected. They have always been there. When you open you know that it has been there. You had always thought it was a wall but suddenly a door opens and new realities become available.
I am there in your heart so it will happen again and again.
[A sannyasin returning to the west says that she feels enmeshed in parental expectations: They really want to take part in the things I do and I don't want them to. I feel really as if they're holding me so much.
Osho asks if she will be living with her parents, and she replies, 'No'.]
No, because that won't be good for you. Just go and see them.
And this is nothing to be worried about; almost everybody feels more or less like that with their parents. Their expectations are natural because they never think of you as a separate individual; they think of you as their projection, their extension, their child. Naturally they want that you should be this and that - famous, respected, rich. Nothing is wrong in it, because that's how they have been brought up: their parents have been conditioning them in this way, they would like to condition you in the same way. You are fortunate that you are alert and so they will not be able to condition you.
For the first time in human history... this is the first time in the whole of history that a few children have been able to get out of the grip of the parents. This is a great revolution, a silent revolution of immense importance. This is a breakthrough; it has never happened before. Once in a while it used to happen: a Buddha would escape, a Jesus would escape, but they were just single individuals, their impact could not have been much. But for the first time in history millions of young people, men and women, are no more in the grip of their parents. Not to be in the grip of the parents means not to be in the grip of history. Not to be in the grip of the parents means not to be in the grip of the past.
This is a breakthrough, a sunrise. New horizons open now: man will never be the same now. All depends on this new generation because it will create new foundations for the new being to evolve.
Otherwise up to now it has been a constant repetition, the same wheel has been going on moving. It is a very subtle wheel: one generation conditions the other generation according to its conditioning; then that generation in its own turn conditions the next generation, and this goes on and on and on. Things seem to be moving but nothing moves because each father repeats his father's training, practices his father's training on his son, so history goes on moving in a vicious circle. People go on changing but the pattern remains the same.
This is something great, this time which you are passing through. It is bound to be of great crisis, turmoil, chaos.
This generation has to suffer much pain too - pain because you are no more part of your parents'
world. You don't belong to it, you are alienated from it, you are homeless. That is the pain, that there is no home now; home means the parents. You cannot look back, you cannot fall back, you cannot return to the security that parents have always been giving. You have to go ahead into the unknown, into the insecure, into you know not what. The past is closed, only the future is open. It is risky, it is adventurous, it is painful, but it is ecstatic too. All around the earth there is great excitement among the new generation: something is going to happen, something which has never happened before.
My whole work here is with the new generation, and if old people have come to me, they are also in a subtle way young; that's why they have come to me, otherwise they cannot be here. Maybe physically they are old but psychologically they are young and fresh.
My whole work is with youth. I am working to create something about which you are not aware. The end of this century, these coming two decades, are going to be of such value that rarely happens even in centuries. It is going to be a clean cut, a gap between the past and the future; man will never be the old again.
So you have to pass through that pain. Don't think it is something personal, it is not. Fortunate are those young people who are passing through it because only they are young. Those who are not passing through it don't belong to this generation, they belong to the past; they have no future. They will be happy; they will be settling into marriage, into good jobs. They will earn money and they will have bank balances and all those things and then they will die. But they will not create the future and they will not live the excitement of creation. Live this excitement and don't think that something is wrong in it.
Don't be hard on your parents, because what can they do? Mm, whatsoever they can do they are trying to do. Feel compassion for them, be loving towards them, but there is no need to compromise.
Compassion does not mean compromise. Be compassionate, be loving, but don't allow them to destroy you!