Neeraj agyana. This means 'a cloud of unknowing'. Have you ever heard of a christian mystic treatise, 'the cloud of unknowing'? It is one of the most beautiful books ever written. The author is unknown - some medieval christian mystic - but it is one of the most penetrating books ever. Mm?
The name of the book is 'the cloud of unknowing' - and that is the meaning of your name. Neeraj means cloud, agyana means unknowing God is known through a sort of unknowing.
God is not known through learning, but through unlearning.
God is not known through the mind, but by dropping of the mind.
God is known in tremendous ignorance, because ignorance is innocence; knowledge is cunning.
Knowledge tries to control. Knowledge makes you powerful. Ignorance makes you humble. So remember not to become knowledgeable. Never allow knowledge to collect around you. Every day knowledge is accumulated through experience; every day, throw it away. It is dust that gathers on the mirror of consciousness.
Scholars, pundits, are the farthest away people from god. So more and more relax in a sort of unknowing. Know that you don't know - and only that knowledge is valuable which knows that it doesn't know. Not knowing is the way. Only through being like small children - innocent, uncorrupted by knowledge, full of wonder - does one come to the divine.
Anand means bliss and pathik means one who is on pilgrimage, a pilgrim - a pilgrim of the path of bliss. And we are pilgrims on the path of bliss; everybody is seeking bliss. Somebody maybe seeking wrongly, somebody rightly, but the search is one. Even when people are seeking money, power, prestige, they are seeking the same thing. They will not find it there because they are seeking in a wrong direction. But the search is true - the direction may be untrue.
And remember this - that it is not enough that you are just seeking the right thing. If you are not seeking in the right direction, you will go on missing. Sometimes it happens that you may not be seeking the right thing, but the direction is right, and you arrive - because the direction is more basic.
You may he going to the railway station, hut you never reach because the direction was not right.
You may be going to the river, but you have reached the railway station. So where you are going is more important. For what you are going is not so important.
Unless your seeking and your direction meet together, you go on missing.
And bliss is not very far away. It is there by the side. One has to just attune oneself to it. And meditation is nothing but getting in tune with bliss. Just as you fix the needle of a radio - a little wavering and the sound is not clear, or it is getting two, three stations together. Just a little tuning, and when the needle comes exactly right at the station, everything is clear.
The mind is just like a needle. You can tune it to the world - you become worldly. You can tune it to money - you become greedy. You can tune it to god and suddenly there is bliss. It is the same mind, the same needle - just the stations change.
Anand means bliss, prabhata means dawn, morning - dawn of bliss. And remember when the night is very dark, the morning is very close by, very near. The darkness gets darkest just before the sun is going to rise. So don't be afraid of the darkness, of anxiety, of confusion, of suffering,- of pain.
They all come to a climax, and only from the climax is transformation - never before it.
One has to bring all that is dark in oneself to a peak. Because we have been taught to repress all that is dark, it never comes to a peak. Hence I teach catharsis - to bring it to a peak. Anger, hatred, violence, aggression, jealousy - bring it to a peak. Only from the peak is the jump. And once you have known anger in its totality, suddenly you will see - it has disappeared; it no more has a hold on you.
Hence only very courageous people can go into the light, because first they will have to go into the dark - that is the problem. Everybody wants the morning, but nobody is ready to go through the night, through the dark night of the soul.
The morning is very close by. Just gather courage to encounter the darkness that is hidden in your being. And once you start encountering it, you will even enjoy it. Nothing is wrong in it... it is part of the game, part of the play.
Prem means love, nirmal means innocent, pure - pure, innocent love. Love is innocent when you don't demand anything out of it.
Love is innocent when there is no motive in it.
Love is innocent when it is nothing but a sharing of your energy.
You have too much, so you share... you want to share.
And whosoever shares with you, you feel grateful to him or her, because you were like a cloud - too full of rainwater - and somebody helped you to unburden. Or you were like a flower, full of fragrance, and the wind came and unloaded you. Or you had a song to sing, and somebody listened attentively... so attentively that he allowed you space to sing it. So to whomsoever helps you to overflow in love, feel grateful.
When love is not motivated, it is prayer. So remember this... and your name will remind you again and again.
Prem prasadam: life is a gift - we have not earned it....
Hence one has to be grateful for everything - small things - and that gratefulness is all that religion is. Once you understand that your life is a gift, a grace, you start feeling grateful.
Ordinarily people feel very complaining. A mind that complains is a non-religious mind. A mind that feels grateful is a religious mind. So this name will remind you to feel grateful... as grateful as possible.
And once you start looking around you find that god has given so much... and we are so blind, so :deaf, that we don't see at all. Such an incredible world, such a wonderful existence, such a tremendous mystery. Each moment of it is an eternity, a diamond - but we go on losing it and we are not even grateful for it.
Feel grateful, and through gratefulness you will grow. Never complain. If you can drop all complaining, that will be your prayer, your meditation.
So whenever the mind starts creating some complaint, immediately become aware and drop it. And suddenly you will see that once the complaining mind has disappeared and gratefulness has come in, you will start looking at life with different eyes... totally different eyes. You will not see this ordinary world - you will see an extraordinary existence... luminous! It is delight... all over! It is a benediction, but we are blind and complaints are like screens - they don't allow us to see.
And once you know that life is a gift, love is a gift, you start feeling more feminine, more receptive.
Then you become less aggressive. When god has given life and has given love, he will give heaven too... he will give truth too. When this miracle of life has become possible, why not the other miracle?
Then one starts waiting. Even seeking stops. One is simply tremendously trustful that everything has happened, everything will happen, and everything as it is, is good.
To remind you of that I am giving you this name, prasadam. It means everything is graceful, everything is good, everything is a gift, and wrong simply does not happen. All that happens is good. Wrong has never happened. If you feel something is wrong, it is your interpretation; it is your complaining mind. Once you drop the mind, you will suddenly see that everything is as it should be.
And in that understanding is relaxation.
It is going to come, and I am going to continue work on you. Mm? now I will be working more.