Deva means divine, manglam means blessing... and that's how I look at life - it is a divine blessing. Many people think so negatively about life that it almost looks like a curse. And there are philosophies that think that life is an accident... meaningless. If one starts looking that way, life becomes that way, because your outlook is going to become your reality. Whatsoever you think is going to become your being.
And then it is a vicious circle. When you think life is a curse and you create things which - because of your thinking - make life appear like a curse, then you say, 'Of course, I was right - life is a curse!'
Then you go on feeding the same vicious circle again and again. It becomes more and more of a misery. And the more miserable it is, the more your basic misconception is felt... becomes stronger.
Somewhere one has to break this circle, this vicious circle. And I would like that by changing your name, you get out of that vicious circle. Start looking positively, start looking meaningfully. Once you think life is a blessing, god's blessing, you start preparing... and it starts changing immediately. It is your outlook, it is your eyes - how you look at things.
I have heard about two prisoners who were confined in the same cell. They were standing near the bars, and one looked at the sky - it was a full moon night... the other looked at a dirty pond just in front of the cell - mosquitoes and smell and dirt. They were both standing at the same door, and one became so full of happiness - looking at the full moon and the white cloud - and felt so happy that he forgot completely that he was a prisoner. In that moment, at least, his soul became free. The other did not look at the sky. He looked at the dirty pond, the smell, and started complaining.
We can live the same life and can look at it differently. So by changing your name, I would like to change your attitude. Try this - start looking at life as a blessing. There are moments when it is very difficult to think of life as a blessing. Those are the moments which test you; those are the moments which function as a touchstone. And if you can remember - even in those moments when it is very easy to be tempted by the negative, if you can remember the positive, and still remain in the positive moment, soon you will see that all negative moments have started disappearing from your life.
Yes, there is a possibility that the whole life can become a bed of roses.
[The new sannyasin said he had a problem of expressing love... and that because he had a physical disability, he felt some difficulty in relating to people.]
Mm mm. Accept it. Whatsoever has happened, has happened. And there is no point in continuously thinking of the past - it is pointless. And your body is perfectly okay. The body is a mechanism, and anything can go wrong with anybody's body. But that is nothing to be bothered about. Never cry and weep for the spilt milk.
And sometimes it happens that people who have suffered, can be more loving than people who have not suffered. You have suffered! You can love more... you can feel more. You can see misery, sadness, unhappiness, more clearly. So don't remain confined in it - come out of it! There is nothing to be worried about. Start loving people, and you will be surprised that the body is not a hindrance at all.
You can see in many beautiful people who are perfectly healthy, the same problem. It has nothing to do with your particular situation. Beautiful people, young, healthy - everything is okay - and still they find it very difficult to communicate, to love people. Everybody is conscious of his limitations - and everybody has limitations. It is impossible to find a person who has not limitations. Maybe they are different....
Napoleon was not very tall, and that was his problem for his whole life. A beautiful man, a successful man - what more could you ask? But his height.... And he felt so jealous - his own soldiers were taller than him.
Once it happened that he was trying to take something from the wall - some photograph or something - and it was too high. His bodyguard was there and he said, 'Wait, sir. You will not be able to reach. I am higher than you, and I can get it very easily.'
Napoleon said, 'Stop that nonsense! Higher? Simply say you are taller!' Mm? even the word 'higher'! He said, 'Simply say you are taller than me, but don't say you are higher than me!' The whole life he suffered from it.
Lenin had a very disproportionate body. His legs were very small, his upper part was bigger - that was his trouble. He came to dominate the greatest empire of the world - Soviet Russia... the greatest territory. But he was continuously afraid of somebody seeing him naked.... He was so conscious of it that he would continuously hide. And his legs were really small - they would not reach to the floor when he sat on a chair. He wouldn't allow a smaller chair, because then everyone would see that he was sitting on a smaller chair.
You cannot find a single person who has not problems. So don't be worried about it. It is only a question of not identifying with your problems any more. Start loving people! Become friendly. Start laughing.
People never look at your body - they look at your soul. In fact the body becomes very important only when you don't have a soul. Sometimes it happens that an ugly person may grow such a beautiful soul that you forget all about his ugliness, and when you are in his presence he looks tremendously beautiful. And the contrary is also happening. There are beautiful people who have only beautiful bodies. Look at them and you see a very ugly soul within.
So if some accident has happened with the body, it has happened. Nothing to worry about. Why not make your soul more beautiful? Maybe it is a chance that you can emphasise your soul more than your body.
This is my observation - that beautiful people, bodily beautiful people, never grow beautiful souls, because they become too egoistic about their body - they think that this is enough.
Have you ever seen a beautiful woman doing any creative work? They never do! They simply live by their body, they never grow their soul. And if you hear about some woman who has done something beautiful, creative, you will always find a homely woman.
It happened once I was staying in a house in calcutta and there was a poets' gathering - a woman poets' gathering - so from all over the country, thirty women poets had gathered there. My host was going, and he said, 'Would you like, sir, to come with me? It is going to be something beautiful.' I said, 'You simply go and tell me one thing: if you can find any beautiful poetess there, tell me.'
He said, 'But why you are interested?' I said, 'Just go and come back and tell me.'
He came and he said, 'It is amazing - not a single woman was beautiful... all the thirty, very homely and ordinary.' He said, 'But why did you ask?'
I said, 'I was just enquiring as to whether ever any beautiful woman would do anything beautiful.
They never do! They think the body is enough - finished!'
So take it as an opportunity. Maybe god has given you a challenge. Now the body is not going to be perfect, why not use it as an opportunity, and work on your being? Work on your consciousness.
Grow a beautiful soul!
And the body is not your reality - it is just the house you live in. Don't get attached to it too much.
It is just a dress that you are wearing. If it is torn apart, okay; it is just a dress. Don't be too much obsessed with it. Just shift your attention. Meditate... Love... create.
And you have beautiful work - architecture is something beautiful. It is going to become more and more important every day in the world. The coming world is going to be of the architect. So many possibilities are there in architecture; so much! No other dimension is as potential as architecture.
Tremendous things have to be done, because the world has become so overpopulated. Sooner or later we will have to float cities in the ocean, fly cities in the sky. We have to do that. So think about these things! Why are you worried about small things?
We will have to make cities on the moon - think about that! It is a very thrilling subject right now. If I were to choose I would like to become an architect (chuckling). It has tremendous potentialities.
So think of big things - why be worried about a small body? And by thinking about big things you become big, you become vast! And when you forget your body, you help others also to forget. If you remember it, and if you are too self-conscious about it, you don't allow others to forget it. Your very self-consciousness creates the trouble. It is not in the body - it is in your self-consciousness.
Try this - for one year, you simply forget the body.... And come back next time for a longer period.
[A visitor says she has been travelling around Asia but not enjoying it; she has been with a teacher before but gave it up. She is not enjoying the meditations. She wants a better relationship with her boyfriend.]
Mm mm. You have come with many expectations and ideas. You have not come to me. You are not here because of me - you are here because of you. So, much will not be happening to you. This is not the state in which something happens. You have too many ideas... you have not come open.
You have come here full of greed - that greed will create trouble. So if you want to be here, you will have to drop all ideas.
Don't be bothered about what is going to happen, otherwise nothing will happen. And don't get in these things: this place is crowded, india is crowded. If you are going to create these problems, better go back, otherwise you will be wasting your time and my time, it will not be of much use. This is how things are. Accept them if you want to grow.
Growth starts only when you are not expecting too much and you do things. You are not to decide that you become tense so you will not do meditations. One day you have done meditation and you think you become tense, so you will not do them anymore - this won't help.
Here you have to pass through meditations, do a few groups.... Tension will come because you are carrying it in yourself. It is not coming because of the meditations. The meditation is simply bringing it up - you have tensions, so tension will come. And you have to go through groups. Whatsoever groups you have done have been useless - they have not done anything.
So be here, do the meditations, join the sufi dancing and do a few groups. And for one month at least, don't bother about what has happened - just go through the processes without waiting for something to happen and things will start happening. If you cannot wait that much, if you are too much after instant results, it is better to go. Why waste time? So you decide. For one month no greed, no idea, and nothing from your side. Things are as they are - you have to fit into these things.
And they are perfect - that's how they should be.
This situation is bringing all your tensions up: the crowd, the people, the touching. They are bringing your real mind up. This is what you are hiding inside yourself. So this is a good situation. Going where you are alone will not help.
You can go to goa or you can go to the himalayas, and be alone, absolutely alone - for miles, thousand miles there will be nobody - but that is not going to help. You need this human situation to force you to explode. Of course, the explosion is painful, but only after that, growth starts, never before it. It is a primal pain - one has to go through it.
So you decide. If you want to be here, then these things I don't take much notice of. Mm? I am completely indifferent about these things. If you want to be here, then do all the meditations. And I am hard on people like you. Do all the meditations with no complaint. Then sufi dancing and then join two, three groups, and if you feel that this is too much and you cannot, you had better go - no need to be getting into it, mm? You decide... And do all the meditations - whatsoever tension happens, let it happen. I am here to help - you just go through it, mm? Good!
[A sannyas couple ask about the woman's energy which is very strong, fiery or aggressive and misdirected. Osho checks her energy.]
Energy is there and a great amount - but nothing to be worried. And it is not misdirected - it is simply undirected. It has no direction... not misdirected. Because when energy is misdirected, then it is very difficult. But it is simply there, undirected. So whatsoever situation allows it any movement in any direction, it takes that. That movement is accidental.
If you are angry, then that becomes the direction. If you are loving, then that becomes the direction.
If you are sad, then the energy becomes sadness. If you are happy, then it goes and becomes happiness. It is not misdirected at all; it is simply not directed. It is there, and you don't know what to do with it. It has to be directed.
And it is more in the lower part of the body, more in the legs, so it is not well spread all over the body.
The first thing is, it has to be directed. The second thing is, it has to be spread all over the body, proportionately. Otherwise you will feel very heavy and cloudy. When the energy is spread rightly, proportionately, one feels very joyous. When the energy is spread not rightly, disproportionately, and some parts of the body become misers and start hoarding it, then it becomes heavy. Your legs are hoarding it.
So dance will be very very helpful. Energy has to be released from the legs so it rises and spreads all over the body. Your upper part of the body is not getting the right nourishment from the energy; the lower part is getting too much. When the lower part gets too much energy, lower emotions will get more. For example, anger will get more than love, because love is a higher centre than the anger. Destructiveness will get more energy than creativeness, because creativeness is a higher centre than destructiveness. Then rather than becoming compassion, it will become more violence.
That's what [your partner] has felt; that's why he says it is misdirected.
So the first thing here is to go into deep dancing. After the camp join sufi dancing. And remain aware that the energy has to be released from the legs upwards, so it arises, comes to the stomach, comes to the heart, comes to the head, spreads to the hands.... And you have to direct it first into your whole body, so it is well-spread.
One day, whenever you will feel that that moment has come when the energy is well proportionately spread, suddenly you will feel light... as if you have grown wings. This is the first thing to be done, because this is a question of the body.
When this has happened, we will do the second thing. The second thing is that you should become interested in some creative work.
That is one of the very basic problems women are facing all over the modern world. It is not just your question - it is a problem for the modern woman. The problem is that for centuries they have never done any creative work - they were not allowed; they were repressed. So they had lived with ordinary day-to-day household work. They have lived below their capacities.
Now suddenly in the modern world that has disappeared. Women have become free. Now they are no more tethered to the household affairs, and they don't know what to do with their energy, because for centuries they have been doing only that work. Now that work is no more there, or even if it is there, it takes only a part of their energy and the remaining part remains unapplied. That unapplied and unoccupied part of energy will become destructive.
Either you make your energy creative, or it will turn sour and become destructive. Energy is a dangerous thing - if you have it, you have to use it creatively, otherwise sooner or later you will find it has become destructive. So find something - whatsoever you like - to put your energy into. Just loving [your partner] won't do! You have to find your own energy outlet. Help him, love him, but you should have your own individuality. Whatsoever you feel like doing, you do. If you want, painting; or if you want, dancing or singing; or if you want to play an instrument.... Whatsoever you want, find a way in which you can become completely lost.
If you can be lost playing a guitar - good! In those moments when you are lost, your energy will be released in a creative way. If you cannot be lost in painting, in singing, in dancing, in playing guitar or a flute, then you will find lower ways of being lost: anger, rage, aggression; these are lower ways to be lost.
One needs to lose oneself. There is a necessity about it, otherwise one becomes too self-conscious.
Moments of complete forgetfulness are needed - they unburden you.
So find something, whatsoever you feel for. And there is no need that it should be something great.
Mm? if you like cleaning the house, then clean the floor - that will do! If you want cooking, cook, but make it an art! Become an artist! You can clean in such a way that it becomes prayer, worship. One can chop wood, and can chop it so artistically - then it is good!
You will be surprised to know that woodcutters are never found with any anger, and woodcutters are never violent, and wood-cutters have never committed murders, because cutting wood, their whole energy.... They are good people. You will always find hunters very good people. Logically they should not be. Logically they should be very violent people. Hunters - they are doing such an ugly thing as killing animals, innocent animals, but you will find them very good people. They will be very very non-violent - because their violence is released.
And non-violent, so-called religious people, you will always find very violent. The sages, the saints, you will always find very very violent... subtly violent, because they don't allow their energy to move anywhere, nor are they creative. They are not destructive, they are not creative - then where is the energy going to go? It becomes heavy. It makes them sad, wooden, dead.
So the first thing, start dancing after the camp - sufi dancing. Put your whole energy into it. And the second thing, find anything that you like, and make it a devotion; The old days are gone; women are no more confined to the house - and that is creating the problem.
They have chosen to be free, but yet they don't know how to be free. Freedom comes through creativity. It is not a political question. Only by being creative will they become free. Political freedom is one thing - it simply negatively removes the barriers, that's all. So the barriers have been removed, the prison wall is no more there, but just to be out of the prison is not enough. Now one has to enjoy the birds and the breeze and the sun and the moon.
Politics cannot do that. No government can force you to enjoy the moon. You can be released from the prison - but now what to do? You have lived in it for so long.... The woman has lived so long in the prison that she does not know anything about the cosmos.
She has never been creative. Now freedom is there, but creativity is not there.
So the modern woman is almost continuously angry and is becoming incapable of love, because anger creates so much disturbance that love becomes difficult. Love needs a certain harmony, silence, melody. Anger creates much disturbance, such incoherence, that when it has gone, then too you are not in a mood - even when it is gone! When it is there, of course you cannot be loving, but then when it is gone, it has devastated so much, it has ruined you so much, that then too you cannot love. And by the time energy is created again, you will become angry again.
That's what you have to do - become creative. And these problems will disappear....